words in movies
Phoebe: Hey Ross! Doesnt Ben go to the Smithfield Day School?
Ross: Yeah I know; hes in Bens class.
Ross: Well actually, Im picking Ben up tomorrow, maybe hell be there.
Ross: Hey I uh just picked up Ben from school
Ross: Well it turns out that Ben and Stings son do not get along.
Ross: Apparently, Stings son made fun of the fact that Bens moms are lesbinims.
Ross: Playpen?! Bens seven!
[Scene: The Midfield Day School, its after school and Ben is taking a drink of water as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: Oh, there you are Ben!
Ben: Aunt Phoebe, what are you doing here?
Ben: Jack? I hate him! Hes a jerk.
Phoebe: Now Ben, sometimes people may seem like jerks on the outside, but they have famous fathers.
Ben: I have to go. My friend Doug is waiting for me over there. (Goes over to Doug.)
Phoebe: Uh-huh, Im with Ben.
The Teacher: Are you one of Bens mothers?
Phoebe: I am one of Bens mothers. Im a lesbian. It was, it was difficult coming out to my parents.
The Teacher: Right. Are you looking for Jacks parents to discuss the problems hes having with Ben? (Phoebe nods Yes.) Yeah. Because I really do think the parents should sit down and have a conversation.
Trudie Styler: You must be Bens mum.
Trudie Styler: I gather Jack and Ben havent been getting along lately.
Trudie Styler: Im told there are two sides to this story, but all Ive heard is that Bens a bit of a poo-poo head.
Trudie Styler: So, I guess you and I should talk about Jack and Ben right now.
Phoebe: Oh good! Then youre in luck! Bens not my son!
Amanda: Hi Ben!
ROSS: [reading his list] Ok, ok, number one: The way you cry at game shows. Number two: how much you love your friends. Number three: the way you play with your hair when you're nervous. Number four: how brave you are for starting your life over. Number five: how great you are with Ben.
[Scene: Amanda's apartment, Ross is arriving with Ben.]
Carol: Hey, Ben! Hey!
Monica: Lips moving, still talking. I mean it may not be ideal, but I'm so ready. No, I-I-I see the way Ben looks at you. It makes me ache, you know?
Ross: Ill be right there. (He goes over and opens the door to Carol, Susan, and Ben.) (To Ben.) Hello! (To Carol.) Hello! (To Susan.) Hey. Uhh, Emily, this is Carol and Susan.
Carol: Hey! Hows Ben?
Ben: Hi!!
Ross: I bet if I talk to Carol and Susan I can convince them to move to London with Ben.
Ross: All right Emily, as much as I love you, I'm sorry, I can't move to London without Ben.
Ross: Its just I always thought when I had another kid it would be different. Now I-I love Ben, but every time I have to drop him off at Carol and Susans, its likeIt breaks my heart a little. I mean Ive always had this picture of me and my next wife in bed on Sunday and, my kid comes running in and leaps up onto the bed. And we all read the paper together. Yknow? Maybe fight over the science section.
(Monica starts taking pictures of Ross and Ben, with the flash.)
Monica: I know what you need, you need a bodyguard. Hey Ross, what is Ben doing after preschool?
Ross: The Armadillo was actually not so thrilled about that part! Okay Ben, its time to light the Hanukkah candles! (Santa, Superman, Monica, Ben, and the Holiday Armadillo go over to the menorah to light the candles.)
Phoebe: Oooh look! Isnt this adorable, Ross let Ben address mine!
Rachel: Monica, number one, I dont think Ben understands the concept of bribery, and number two, I... (Joey starts laughing in the background) (to Joey) What?!
ROSS: Don't be silly. Ben loves you. He's just being Mr. Crankypants.
Ben: Hi!
Ross: (entering, with Ben) Hi!
Monica: Hi Ben!
Ross: (to Monica) You wanna wander in the hall? (to Ben) Ooh, hey Ben, what if the Holiday Armadillo told you all about the festival of lights?
Carol: (entering with Ben and Ross) Hey guys!
Ross: Joey, you look nothing like Ben.
Ross: All right, I gotta take off. I'm picking up Ben then we're off to the big audition.
[Scene: Ben and Joey's (Isn't that an ice cream??) callback.]
Ross: (Pause) Yeah I am! Yeah, Ben got a second audition!
Ross: Okay, I've got to go pick up Ben but I-I will figure something out. (He opens the door and stops.) Hey, didn't he used to have a cat?
Joey: I just said that so you wouldn't let Ben do it! Look Ross, if anyone should step aside it should be Ben!
Carol: Joey, Ross is gonna be here any second, would you mind watching Ben for me while I use the ladies' room?
Ross: (angrily) Ben! (Pause.) (Happily.) I mean, Ben! Ben!
Ross: Maybe I should get another pair! Ooh, y'know, they-they had some with fringe all down the sides. (Chandler starts rubbing his temple again.) I'm gonna go kiss Ben goodnight. (He starts to head for Monica's bedroom.) I can't believe he thinks I'm a cowboy. (Pause.) I would make a good cowboy. (He struts into Monica's room.)
The Casting Director: (entering) Okay uh, we have narrowed it down to Raymond, Ben, Kyle, and Joey. The rest of you, thank you very much.
Ross: I know, it's crazy! We were just pushing Ben on the swings
Carol: Guess what? Ben is going to be in a TV commercial!
Ross: All right, I gotta go. I'm taking Ben to the park.
[Scene: Ben's audition, Carol, Ross, and Ben along with about 10 more families are in a waiting room as Joey enters happily.]
Monica: See? Ben doesn't think you're a loser, he thinks you're a cowboy! Now that's something.
Ross: Because, because Ive got Ben.
Emily: If anyone asks, well just say Ben addressed them. (Looking through the envelopes.) Oh! So you invited Rachel then?
[Scene: Carol and Susans, Rachel is talking with Ben.]
Joey: (quietly) Ive got Ben.
Ben: No more pranks.
Ross: (to the guys) I gotta go make a fake Ben.
Ross: Ben, say hi to Aunt Monica. (He holds the phone to the fake Ben he has created out of a pumpkin.) Oh, I guess he doesnt feel like talking right now. Hes smiling though! Okay, talk to you later.
Ross: Chandler, what kind of an idiot do you take me for? (As he picks up the fake Ben.)
Ben: That you and daddy were not on a break.
Ben: (yelling from off camera) Crap!!
Ben: Yay! (Runs off.)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is in the kitchen as Ross and Ben are entering.]
Ben: (entering) Dad!! (Runs and hugs him.)
Ross: Hey Im sorry to do this to you again but uh, is there any way you can look after Ben for a little bit? I-Ive got this meeting at school. And-and he-he asked for his uh, Fun Aunt Rachel, so
Ross: Yeah? Well, I-I think Bens asleep.
Ross: Wait! No! Ben, come here! I am not kidding!
Rachel: Ohhh! Well of course I will watch him! We have fun, dont we Ben? (He nods yes.)
Ross: What? (She takes the sign off and hands it to him.) Thats great. That is great. (Crumples up the paper and throws it down in anger.) What did we just finish talking about Ben?!
Ross: All right, thats it! (He runs over to Ben, but he runs past him and out the door.) Comeyouno! You are in big trouble young man!
Ben: What did we just finish talking about Ben?!
[Cut to the hallway, Ben runs upstairs with Ross in pursuit.]
Ross: Yeah, well my-my ex-wife and I share custody of Ben and umm, uh, and just so you know, Carol and I are on excellent terms as Im sure you are with your wife! (Realizes) Oh, Im sorry! (To Elizabeth) Its unbelievable!
(At this point a stream of obscenities burst forth from Phoebes mouth just in time for Ben and Ross to enter and hear most of it, and in slow motion Ross tries to shield his innocent son from Phoebes vulgarity.)
Ben: (on the bike) Im ready!
Ben: Uh-huh!
Ben: (To Chandler) Thanks daddy.
Monica: Matt Guire, Mark Lynn, Ben Wire
[Scene: Central Park, Ross is teaching Ben how to ride a bike. Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are they also.]
Ross: (Thinking it over) Sure! (Takes one) Hey, I just found out, I get Ben for the holidays this year.
Rachel: You may need to use this year to teach Ben about Phoebe.
Ben: (singing) Jingle bells, jingle bells...
Ben: Christmas eve.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is whirling Ben around.]
Ben: Santa has reindeers that can fly!
Ben: Christmas.
Ross: Well, I do, so let's... (Ben and Ross sit down on the couch) So, Ben, you uh, you know what holiday is coming up, don't ya?
Ross: Yes, but also (Pauses to let Ben answer, but he doesnt.) Hanukkah! See, you're part Jewish, and-and Hanukkah is a Jewish holiday.
Ben: When is Santa coming?
Ben: So Santa's coming?
Ben: Santa's mad at me.
Ben: No.
Ben: No Santa? Was I bad?
Ross: No! Oh, no-no-no. Hey, you weren't bad, you've been very good, Ben.
Ben: (singing) Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer...
Ben: Texas?
Ben: Cool!
Monica: Come on Ben.
Ben: Wow! Thanks!
Ross: You're welcome, Ben. Merry Christmas, ooh, and Happy Hanukkah!
Ben: Santa! (Runs to Chandler and hugs him)
[Ross turns around and walks back to Ben.]
[Monica and Ben sit down on the couch.]
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica has just opened the door for Ross who is costumed as an Armadillo. Ben is standing next to her.]
Ben: No! Why does he have to go?
Ross: I'm the Holiday Armadillo, your part-Jewish friend. You sent me here to give Ben some presents. Remember?
Chandler: Well, I'm here to see my old buddy Ben. What are you doing here, weird turtle-man?
Ben: Did you bring me any presents, Santa?
Chandler: Hey! (Grunts as Ben hits him at full speed.)
Ben: Okay, Santa!
Ben: No! Why can't the Armadillo leave? I want Santa!
Ross: Okay Ben, Santa has to go. Say good-bye!
Ross: That's right, Ben. I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico! But, Santa sent me here to give you these presents, Ben. (He tries to bend down to pick up the bag with the presents, but can't because of the costume) Maybe the Lady will help me with these presents.
Ben: (answering him) Eight whole days.