words in movies
Ross: Okay, I've got to go pick up Ben but I-I will figure something out. (He opens the door and stops.) Hey, didn't he used to have a cat?
[Cut to the hallway, Ben runs upstairs with Ross in pursuit.]
(At this point a stream of obscenities burst forth from Phoebes mouth just in time for Ben and Ross to enter and hear most of it, and in slow motion Ross tries to shield his innocent son from Phoebes vulgarity.)
Ross: Yeah, well my-my ex-wife and I share custody of Ben and umm, uh, and just so you know, Carol and I are on excellent terms as Im sure you are with your wife! (Realizes) Oh, Im sorry! (To Elizabeth) Its unbelievable!
Ben: (on the bike) Im ready!
Ben: Uh-huh!
Ben: (To Chandler) Thanks daddy.
[Scene: Central Park, Ross is teaching Ben how to ride a bike. Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are they also.]
Monica: Matt Guire, Mark Lynn, Ben Wire
Ross: (Thinking it over) Sure! (Takes one) Hey, I just found out, I get Ben for the holidays this year.
Rachel: You may need to use this year to teach Ben about Phoebe.
Ben: No.
Ben: (singing) Jingle bells, jingle bells...
Ben: No Santa? Was I bad?
Ross: No! Oh, no-no-no. Hey, you weren't bad, you've been very good, Ben.
Ben: Christmas eve.
Ben: So Santa's coming?
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is whirling Ben around.]
Ben: Santa's mad at me.
Ben: Santa has reindeers that can fly!
Ben: (singing) Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer...
Ben: Christmas.
Ross: Well, I do, so let's... (Ben and Ross sit down on the couch) So, Ben, you uh, you know what holiday is coming up, don't ya?
Ross: Yes, but also (Pauses to let Ben answer, but he doesnt.) Hanukkah! See, you're part Jewish, and-and Hanukkah is a Jewish holiday.
Ben: When is Santa coming?
Ben: Texas?
Ben: Cool!
Ross: You're welcome, Ben. Merry Christmas, ooh, and Happy Hanukkah!
Monica: Come on Ben.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica has just opened the door for Ross who is costumed as an Armadillo. Ben is standing next to her.]
Ben: Wow! Thanks!
Ben: Santa! (Runs to Chandler and hugs him)
[Monica and Ben sit down on the couch.]
Ben: No! Why does he have to go?
[Ross turns around and walks back to Ben.]
Ross: I'm the Holiday Armadillo, your part-Jewish friend. You sent me here to give Ben some presents. Remember?
Chandler: Well, I'm here to see my old buddy Ben. What are you doing here, weird turtle-man?
Ben: Did you bring me any presents, Santa?
Chandler: Hey! (Grunts as Ben hits him at full speed.)
Ross: Okay Ben, Santa has to go. Say good-bye!
Ross: Thats right! Wait no, Ben.
Ben: Awesome!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Phoebe is watching Bert and Ernie with Ben.]
Ben: Okay, Santa!
Ben: No! Why can't the Armadillo leave? I want Santa!
Ross: That's right, Ben. I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico! But, Santa sent me here to give you these presents, Ben. (He tries to bend down to pick up the bag with the presents, but can't because of the costume) Maybe the Lady will help me with these presents.
Ben: (answering him) Eight whole days.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Santa (Chandler), Superman (Joey), Ben, and Monica are listening to the Holiday Armadillo (Ross) finish telling the story of Hanukkah.]
Rachel: Ben, its Rachel! (He closes the door.) But whatever.
Rachel: Hi! Hi Ben!
Ben: (running to the bathroom) Thanks Phoebe!
(Ben starts to go, but Ross stops him.)
Ross: (to Ben) Okay! All clear!
Ben: Hi.
Ross: (to Ben) Everything okay in there?
Ben: Ill be okay.
Ben: Dont talk to me now!
Ross: Well, Ben would be there.
Ben: Not really.
Ben: Bye dad.
Ben: Okay.
Rachel: I found him! (To Ben) Very funny, come here! (She sits down on the coffee table and Ben walks up.) That is exactly why Ive come here to talk to you okay?
Ben: (mimicking her) Remember all that stuff I taught you yesterday?
Rachel: Well yknow I was just in the neighborhood and I passed by your building and I thought to myself, "Whats up with Carol and sweet, little Ben?"
Ben: Oh crap!
Ben: Dont do that.
Ben: Oh damnit!
Ben: Damnit!
Ben: Damnit!
Ben: Really? Like how?
Ben: Cause you guys were on a break.
Ben: But youre not anymore!
Rachel: Ben yknow when uh, when you were a baby, you and I used to hang out all the time. Cause I was, I was your daddys girlfriend.
Ben: Yeah, youre funny.
Ben: (laughs) Thats a good one.
Ben: Can I do it to you?
Rachel: Yeah, I-I-I-Im funny Ben, but Im not stupid. Okay?
Ross: Yes! Ben learned a little trick.
Ben: (jumping up from behind her chair) Gotcha!! (Rachel jumps up startled.)
Carol: Hey Rachel! (The camera cuts to her face and we see that Ben pulled the quarter trick with her as well.)
Ross: No, hey-hey, come on, (He grabs Ben and sits him on his lap) Ben, Santa is not mad at you, okay? Hey, you're-you're his favorite little guy!
Ben: Whats a virgin?
Ben: Im not allowed to have soda.
[Scene: The Midfield Day School, its after school and Ben is taking a drink of water as Phoebe enters.]
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Ben are sitting on the couch bored out of their minds.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Carol and Susan are dropping off Ben.]
Chandler: Well, I'll stay, but only because I wanna hear about Hanukkah. Ben, will you sit here with Santa and learn about Hanukkah?
Jennifer: Oh little Ben.
[Cut to Carol and Susans apartment, from next weeks episode Rachel is talking to Ben.]
Ross: Well actually, Im picking Ben up tomorrow, maybe hell be there.
Ross: Look, I gotta go pick up Ben. Everything so far sounds great Joey, just remember to keep it on the mellow side, okay? Just a couple of guys hanging out playing poker, no-no strippers or anything okay?
Ben: Are you for Hanukkah, too? Because I'm part-Jewish.
Ross: Yeah I know; hes in Bens class.
Ben: Da Da.
Ben: Da Da.
[Cut to Central Perk, Ross is taking Ben to visit Rachel whos working there.]
Ben: Da Da.
Rachel: Hey! We were not on aOkay. Thats fine! Fine. Yknow what Ben? One day when you are a lot older I am going to tell you that entire story over a pitcher of real margaritas, okay?
Ross: Its Ben and his Da-Da. Da-Da? Can you say Da-Da? Yknow, you might as well say it because I told your
Ross: Well it turns out that Ben and Stings son do not get along.
Phoebe: Uh-huh, Im with Ben.