words in movies
Carol: (entering with Ben and Ross) Hey guys!
Ben: Hi!!
Carol: Guess what? Ben is going to be in a TV commercial!
Ross: (sets Ben down) Well, it's not for sure but umm, we met this guy in the park who thought Ben was really cute--y'know, which he is--so umm anyhoo, he uh, he gave us his card and told us to bring him down for this commercial he's auditioning.
Joey: (reading the card) Whoa! This guy is like the biggest commercial casting director in town! (Ross gasps) Ben takes one lousy walk in the park and gets an audition!! (Ross and Carol stare at him, then Joey realizes what he just said.) I mean, way to go Ben! (Gives Ben the thumbs up, which Ben returns.) Man! I've been in that park a million times and no one offered me an audition.
Ross: I know, it's crazy! We were just pushing Ben on the swings
Ross: All right, I gotta take off. I'm picking up Ben then we're off to the big audition.
Ross: Yeah the dad and Ben eat soup and pretend to enjoy it.
[Scene: Ben's audition, Carol, Ross, and Ben along with about 10 more families are in a waiting room as Joey enters happily.]
Ross: Yeah well, he's not gonna get this one. Ben is way cuter than that kid. I mean look at him, look at you, (Starts to whine like a baby and Joey just glares at him.)
Ross: Joey, you look nothing like Ben.
Ross: (Pause) Yeah I am! Yeah, Ben got a second audition!
[Scene: Ben and Joey's (Isn't that an ice cream??) callback.]
The Casting Director: (entering) Okay uh, we have narrowed it down to Raymond, Ben, Kyle, and Joey. The rest of you, thank you very much.
The Casting Director: Actually, that can't happen. Yeah because you all have such different looks, we're putting you with Raymond and Kyle with Ben. So it'll be either you two (Points to Joey and Raymond) or you two. (Points to Kyle and Ben.) (Exits.)
Joey: Well, I've been thinking about this whole commercial thing, y'know me going up against Ben, the two of us competing, and that can't lead to anything good. So, I think I'm just gonna step aside. I'm gonna tell them that I won't audition.
Joey: I just said that so you wouldn't let Ben do it! Look Ross, if anyone should step aside it should be Ben!
Ross: Why should Ben step aside? It was his audition in the first place! You-you just tagged along! You're like the uh, tag-a-long dad.
Carol: Joey, Ross is gonna be here any second, would you mind watching Ben for me while I use the ladies' room?
Joey: (goes over to Ben) Hi Ben! So you wanna be an actor huh? I gotta tell ya, it's no picnic. There's tons of rejection. No stability. One day you're Dr. Drake Remoray, the next day you're eating ketchup right out of the bottle.
Ross: (angrily) Ben! (Pause.) (Happily.) I mean, Ben! Ben!
Ross: (pause) I think on some level, you-you sabotaged your own audition so that Ben would get the part.
Joey: No, it's just ah, I care so damn much about little Ben that uh, it was more important to see him succeed.
ROSS: What about Ben? We can't bring a baby to a hospital.
(Chandler and Joey are loaded down with baby stuff, and Ben)
JOEY: Well, well that one has ducks on his t-shirt, and this one has clowns. And Ben was definitely wearing ducks.
BOTH (but to different babies): Oh, Ben! Hey, buddy!
ROSS: I hope Ben has a little sister.
(Ben starts crying)
MONICA: Aw, my little nephew. Come here, little one. There's my little baby Ben. Hey, my little boy. Hey, he's not crying.
ROSS: Will you hold Ben for a sec? Come here. Come here.
CHANDLER: Hey, Ben, remember us? Ok, the mole came off.
MONICA: So your first whole weekend without Ben, what're you guys gonna do?
ROSS: Have a good time. Ok, Ben.
CHANDLER AND JOEY: (running after bus) Ben! Ben! Ben!
ROSS: Let me hold him for a sec. There. (Ben stops crying) Huh? There we are.
ROSS: [childishly] OK. OK, this is a picture frame from Ben to my parents, huh.
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel is working. Ross enters with Ben.]
RACHEL: Oh, yeah sure, Ok. [she takes Ben and holds him at arms length]
RACHEL: Uh, I'm holding Ben.
CHANDLER: Isn't Ben in this?
[Monica pushes Ben down the aisle in a stroller. Susan is escorted by both her parents. Carol is escorted by Ross.]
ROSS: Yeah. Ya know, a boy and a girl. Hopefully the girl will come first so Ben here won't feel too competitive.
ROSS: Hi, we're visitiing. It's Ben and his da-da. Da-da. Can you say da-da? Look, I'm gonna tell your momies you said it anyway so you might as well try.
RACHEL: Ok, we can do this now, can't we Ben? Yes we can, yes we can. [finishes the diaper] There. I did it. I did it. Look at that, oh, stays on and everything. Hi.
[at Ross's. Carol and Susan are picking Ben up]
RACHEL: Guess what. Ben just said his first word.
BEN: Bye.
ROSS: Bye Ben.
BEN: Bye.
BEN: Bye.
BEN: Bye.
BEN: Hi.
RACHEL: Ben just said hi.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol and Susan are picking up Ben, while Monica is pouring chocolate syrup, lots of it, into her ice cream.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Richard and Monica are playing with Ben.]
Chandler: You bet I did, Ben, put it there! (He shakes Ben's hand, but the money falls out of his hands) (to Monica) Well, it would have worked this time, if his hands weren't so damn small! (Realizes, that Ben is standing right there) Ho, ho, ho!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is still trying to get Ben to play with something other than the Barbi doll.]
RACHEL: I'm sorry, what did you just say? Did you just say hi? Oh my God, Ross, Ross, Ben just said 'Hi'.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol and Susan are dropping off Ben]
Monica: So, do you want me to watch Ben for you?
PHOEBE: [pauses the tape] Ok, Ben, this is the part where Ernie buries Bert in the sand and can't find him. Now, I've looked ahead on the tape and he does find him again. But, ok, before that happens, there's some pretty rough goin' for a while but I think we can handle it. And, there's just the alphabet but we know that ends well so. Ok, here we go. [starts the tape again]
Ross: Oh my God, he just said your name, thats great! Good job Ben.
Monica: (to Ben) Whos so brave, youre so brave, yes you are, youre so brave.
Ben: Monica.
Ben: Monica bang!
Ben: Monica bang!
Ben: Monica.
Ben: Monica bang!
Monica: Oh-ho-ho, sweetie, sweetie, you gotta stop saying that, now. Its no big deal, its not even worth mentioning, you see we all do it all the time. See watch this, Ben, Ben, Ben. (goes over and starts hitting her head on the post) Ow, Monica bang! (does it again) Everybody bang. (repeats) Ben bang. (repeats) Rachel bang. (repeats) Bang, Rachel bang! Oh, isnt that fun?
Rachel: Okay. Okay honey, hes fine, hes fine, lets just put him down. Come here, Ben. (sets him on the couch) See thats a good boy. (to Monica) How could you do that to him!! Ross trusted me, what is he going to say?!
Monica: Here. Ben, do you wanna play the airplane game, do you wanna show Rachel? Come here. (takes Ben) Were gonna do something fun. Okay. (throws Ben up in the air a little bit and catches him) Weee!! (moves into the living room and does it again) Weee!! (starts to walk back into the kitchen as she does it again, and hits Bens head on that wooden beam across the ceiling.)
Monica: Hey, hey, look. Look Ross, Ben drew a picture of you! (Shows him Ben's picture.) Huh? You're-you're a cowboy!
Rachel: (holding Ben) Look Benny, spoon. (moves it back and forth) Spoon. Come on! All right, y'know what I think hes bored.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are dressing up Ben in the entire rain suit from Rainy Day Bear.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross has just finished putting Ben to sleep, and is entering from Rachels room.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are babysitting Ben.]
Ross: Oh, I've got to go pick up Ben, we've got a play date this afternoon.
Ross: Wheres Ben?
Amanda: Hi Ben!
Rachel: So were okay, were okay, were okay, (starts to exam Ben) arent we? No, were not okay, were not okay, theres a bump, theres a bump.
Ross: Ben, I want you to know that there may be some times when I may not be around, like this. (walks out of the picture) But I'll still always come back, like this. (returns) And sometimes I may be away longer, like this. (walks away) But I'll still always come back, like this. (returns)
ROSS: [reading his list] Ok, ok, number one: The way you cry at game shows. Number two: how much you love your friends. Number three: the way you play with your hair when you're nervous. Number four: how brave you are for starting your life over. Number five: how great you are with Ben.
Monica: Lips moving, still talking. I mean it may not be ideal, but I'm so ready. No, I-I-I see the way Ben looks at you. It makes me ache, you know?
[Scene: Amanda's apartment, Ross is arriving with Ben.]
Ross: The Armadillo was actually not so thrilled about that part! Okay Ben, its time to light the Hanukkah candles! (Santa, Superman, Monica, Ben, and the Holiday Armadillo go over to the menorah to light the candles.)
Carol: Hey! Hows Ben?
Ross: Ill be right there. (He goes over and opens the door to Carol, Susan, and Ben.) (To Ben.) Hello! (To Carol.) Hello! (To Susan.) Hey. Uhh, Emily, this is Carol and Susan.
Carol: Hey, Ben! Hey!
Ross: All right Emily, as much as I love you, I'm sorry, I can't move to London without Ben.
Phoebe: Oooh look! Isnt this adorable, Ross let Ben address mine!
Ross: I bet if I talk to Carol and Susan I can convince them to move to London with Ben.
Ross: Its just I always thought when I had another kid it would be different. Now I-I love Ben, but every time I have to drop him off at Carol and Susans, its likeIt breaks my heart a little. I mean Ive always had this picture of me and my next wife in bed on Sunday and, my kid comes running in and leaps up onto the bed. And we all read the paper together. Yknow? Maybe fight over the science section.
Rachel: Monica, number one, I dont think Ben understands the concept of bribery, and number two, I... (Joey starts laughing in the background) (to Joey) What?!
ROSS: Don't be silly. Ben loves you. He's just being Mr. Crankypants.
Ben: Hi!
Ross: (entering, with Ben) Hi!
Monica: Hi Ben!
Monica: See? Ben doesn't think you're a loser, he thinks you're a cowboy! Now that's something.
(Monica starts taking pictures of Ross and Ben, with the flash.)
Monica: I know what you need, you need a bodyguard. Hey Ross, what is Ben doing after preschool?
Ross: Maybe I should get another pair! Ooh, y'know, they-they had some with fringe all down the sides. (Chandler starts rubbing his temple again.) I'm gonna go kiss Ben goodnight. (He starts to head for Monica's bedroom.) I can't believe he thinks I'm a cowboy. (Pause.) I would make a good cowboy. (He struts into Monica's room.)
Ross: All right, I gotta go. I'm taking Ben to the park.
Ross: (to Monica) You wanna wander in the hall? (to Ben) Ooh, hey Ben, what if the Holiday Armadillo told you all about the festival of lights?
Ross: Okay, I've got to go pick up Ben but I-I will figure something out. (He opens the door and stops.) Hey, didn't he used to have a cat?
Emily: If anyone asks, well just say Ben addressed them. (Looking through the envelopes.) Oh! So you invited Rachel then?
Joey: (quietly) Ive got Ben.
Ross: Ben, say hi to Aunt Monica. (He holds the phone to the fake Ben he has created out of a pumpkin.) Oh, I guess he doesnt feel like talking right now. Hes smiling though! Okay, talk to you later.
Ross: (to the guys) I gotta go make a fake Ben.
Ross: Because, because Ive got Ben.
Ben: (entering) Dad!! (Runs and hugs him.)
Ross: Chandler, what kind of an idiot do you take me for? (As he picks up the fake Ben.)
Ben: No more pranks.
[Scene: Carol and Susans, Rachel is talking with Ben.]
Ben: That you and daddy were not on a break.
Ben: (yelling from off camera) Crap!!
Ben: Yay! (Runs off.)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is in the kitchen as Ross and Ben are entering.]
Ross: What? (She takes the sign off and hands it to him.) Thats great. That is great. (Crumples up the paper and throws it down in anger.) What did we just finish talking about Ben?!
Ross: Yeah? Well, I-I think Bens asleep.
Ross: Hey Im sorry to do this to you again but uh, is there any way you can look after Ben for a little bit? I-Ive got this meeting at school. And-and he-he asked for his uh, Fun Aunt Rachel, so
Rachel: Ohhh! Well of course I will watch him! We have fun, dont we Ben? (He nods yes.)
Ross: Wait! No! Ben, come here! I am not kidding!