words in movies
Phoebe: Its a video of my friend giving birth. Could you just bring it back to your apartment?
Rachel: Oh mom, I swear Im not an idiot. Ive read all kinds of books on pregnancy and giving birth, but I-I just didnt think to read the part about what to do when the baby comes. And-and then guess what? The babys coming and I dont know what to do. Oh, can I throw up in my diaper genie?
Soothing male voice: ..a sound Mom and Dad never forget. For this after all, is the miracle of birth.
Ross: God, I don't believe this. She could be giving birth in the cab.
[Scene: Carol's Room, she is ready to give birth. Everyone is there except for Phoebe, Ross, and Susan, who are in the broom closet.]
Susan: I know its frightening, but, big picture. The birth part is just one day, and when its over, were all gonna be parents for the rest of our lives.
Phoebe: Five? Okay, where am I giving birth, a hospital or a big box under the stairs?
PHOEBE: Okay, ask her 'What is her current method of birth control?'
[Scene: Phoebe Sr.s house, its right after she told Phoebe that shes her birth mother.]
Phoebe: Well, umm, my Moms friend, Phoebe, is actually my birth Mom.
Joey: Spocks birth control.
Phoebe: My mom never gave birth. Oh! But my birth mom did.
Phoebe: Yeah, okay. Hey, wait. Do you know what kind of birth control she was using?
[Scene: Joey's room, he is recovering from his birth.]
Phoebe: Do you have my birth certificate?
The Doctor: Actually, giving birth to three babies isnt that different from giving birth to one.
Rachel: When?! After the birth of our first secret child?! (To All) Ross didnt get the annulment; we are still married.
[Cut to the delivery room, Phoebe is about to give birth to the middle kid.]
Phoebe: You have your birth certificate?
Phoebe: Hey! Ive got a great idea for party favors for the shower. Okay, we get some uh mahogany boxes and carve everyones names in them and inside is everyones individual birth stone.
[Scene: The Delivery Room, Rachel is finally giving birth.]
[This starts a series of flashbacks beginning with Monica and Chandler in the waiting room in The One With the Birth.]
Phoebe: I will find a selfless good deed! 'Cause I just gave birth to three children and I will not let them be raised in a world where Joey is right!
Mrs. Geller: I actually needed to talk to you before the birth.
Cliff: Cant you figure that out based on my date of birth?
Ursula: Yea-huh! Thats what is says on my birth certificate.
Joey: Date of birth?
[Scene: Joeys Bedroom, Joey is having a dream about Rachel giving birth with him as the father.]
Monica: Listen uh, I-Ive been doing some thinking, and I dont know whether its because were here or Rachels giving birth but umm, I think we should try to have a baby.
Joey: Its pretty, Okay date of birth?
Joey: I'll have you know that Gloria Tribbiani was a handsome woman in her day, alright? You think it's easy giving birth to seven children?
Phoebe: Good. It's just so hard, it's hard for me to ... let them go. I guess it just brings back memories, you know, from ... when I gave birth to my brother's triplets and I had to give them up. (Mike is shocked) I haven't told you about that yet, have I?
Phoebe: yeah well (pause) yeah you know Emma's birth certificate might say Geller but her eyes say Mookurgee.
Joey: Oh ... (Starts to sing) Happy birth ... (sees Molly leaving) oh, see you later (runs after Molly)
Chandler: Yeah, but how would you like it if someone told the triplets that you gave birth to them?
Monica: Chandler, you don't wanna miss this. This is the birth of your child! It's the miracle of life!
(Monica walks down to Erica's legs to watch the birth.)
Phoebe: (looking at the clock) Oh wow, three hours and still no baby. Ugh, the miracle of birth sure is a snooze fest.
Rachel: Ooh, I miss dating. Gettin all dressed up and going to a fancy restaurant. Im not gonna be able to do that for so long, and its so much fun! I mean not that sitting at home worrying about giving birth to a sixteen pound baby is not fun.
[Scene: The Hospital. Erica is moaning and about to give birth. Monica, Chandler, a nurse and a doctor are there with her.]
Woman Giving Birth: (yelling from the hallway) Its coming! Its coming!
[Cut to Chandler sitting down near Joey as his mom walks over. His birth mother, not the mother who recently visited one of those clinics in Sweden.]
Joey: Uh, if I may? Umm-umm look, Cliff, you told me a lot of personal stuff about you, right? And maybe-maybe it would if-if would help if-if you knew some personal stuff about her. Uh, she was married to a gay ice dancer. Uh, she gave birth to her brothers triplets. Oh! Oh! Her-her twin sister used to do porn!
Phoebe: Okay, well umm, I know that we havent talked in a long time, but umm okay, our Mom is not our birth Mom. This-this other lady is our birth Mom.