words in movies
Ross: Okay! You guys are getting married tomorrow and-and I couldnt be more thrilled for both of you, but as Monicas older brother I-I have to tell you this. If you ever hurt my little sister, if you ever cause her any unhappiness of any kind, I will hunt you down, and kick your ass! (Chandler laughs.) What? Im-Im-Im serious! (Chandler laughs harder.) ComeHey! Dude! Stop it! Okay? Im-Im not kidding here!
Monica: It-its so great to see you both here.
(Joey and Richard both wipe their faces and are given towels.)
Ross: No! I made it seem like I was just calling to chat. Pretty sure, they both think Im interested in them.
[Scene: The Movie Set, Joey and Richard are in the middle of a scene. They are both holding swords.]
Joey: No! No, Im the minister! All right, look-look, put em both on the phone, Ill marry them right now.
(They both go out into the hall.)
Chandler: You look beautiful mom. (His dad clears his throat.) You look beautiful too dad. I love you both. (He kisses his dad on the cheek) Im so glad you here. (He kisses his mom.)
(They both step up onto the altar and she notices the rabbi.)
(Chandler and Monica both turn, take the rings from Ross and Rachel respectively, and place them on each others fingers.)
Monica: Aw, it's soo unfair. (they both start digging into the 'good' ice cream)
Ross: (stopping quickly) Oh umm, theres also a book here by a woman named Wendy Bagina. (They both laugh, but stop when the hear moaning coming from the next aisle.) What is that?
(They both sit down at the table and the chick and the duck enter from Joeys bedroom.)
Phoebe: You guys. You suck too. (She hugs them both.)
Both: (screaming with excitement) Aah!
(Both Monica and Rachel laugh.)
Joey: Yeah, I-I-I'm down with that. (He turns back to the woman.) Okay, here goes. (Thinks.) How (Holds up his hand like an Indian) you (Points at her) a-doin'? (Does a little twisting motion with both hands and ends up pointing at her, he then winks. She smiles and waves again.) (To Monica) It worked! She's waving me over. (Towards the woman.) Okay, I-I-I'll be right over. Let's see, she's on the third floor
(They both confer.)
Ross: Well, it was loong. I didnt even realise how late it was, until I noticed the 5 oclock shadow on her head. (They both start to laugh, then stop themselves quickly.) Anyway, she didnt want to stay. I called a cab; she just left.
(They both shiver in horror.)
Monica: That's mine!! Now, would you both please start acting like adults? And get me my cough drops!
(Monica nods `Yes.' And they both walk to the couch looking all depressed.)
Frank: Oh I know!! (Both he and Alice squeal hysterically)
(They both sit down on the chairs and put up the foot rest.)
(She opens a door and they both scream at horror at whats inside of it.)
Frank: Okay. (They both squeal in expectation.)
JOEY: Oh we flipped for it. I got the cigar, he got the moustache. Figured if we both grew it, we'd look like dorks.
Chandler: Yes, but in Rosss case, they both know in two weeks thats it.
Ross: Yeah, shes got to go back to London. But you know what? Ive been prepared for this from the start. We both knew we had two weeks together, and thats it. Yknow.
(They both move to kiss again.)
Joey: Welcome to America. (They both kiss.)
(They both go to Chandlers bedroom to get his coat.)
Both: Three.
(They both sit back down.)
(They both hug.)
(They both run and hug theyre respective partners.)
Emily: I love both of you!
Both: All right!
Ross: (entering) Hey, guys! (They both notice his new little friend)
(Both Joey and Chandler and Monica and Rachel jump up and down for joy.)
Chandler: I dont think this town is big enough for both of us to relax in. (He blows on his hand) Draw!! (He quickly pulls the lever to raise the foot rest, like a gunfighter in a Western.)
Both: Sunshine is here! The sky is clear, the mornings here!
The Saleslady: Yes! I have it right here. (Phoebe and Monica both gasp at the dress.) Would you like to try it on Ms. Waltham?
Phoebe: (catching it) I got it! Mine! (They both hug)
Ross: Look, I didn't lose my mind! Okay, Janice and I have a lot in common! We've-we've both been divorced. We-we both have kids.
Rachel: Hi! Phoebe. (Both Monica and her try to move out of Phoebes way.)
Chandler: Marry me. (Both Ross and Chandler hit him.)
Joey: Wait up! (They both run to the bathroom.)
(They both turn and wipe their eyes.)
Rachel: The logic is, that there are two of us and we are both strong enough to break a chair in half!
Ross: Thanks guys! (They both sit down on either side of him.) I really appreciate this, yknow, but you dont have to rub my butt.
Joey: Okay. (They both walk off to watch for Rachel.)
Monica: But my clothes areohh! (They both leave.)
(They both start to frantically rip each others clothes off, but are interrupted when Joey tries to open the door.)
Monica: You are both idiots. The joke is not funny, and its offensive to women, and doctors, and monkeys! You shouldnt be arguing over who gets credit, you should be arguing over who gets blamed for inflicting this horrible joke upon the world! Now let it go! The joke sucks!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, theyre both unpacked. The big ceramic dog has found a new home in front of the window. Joey screams and runs into the living room.]
Erica: I don't think so. Although, they did mention something about two heartbeats. But I thought that was just mine and the baby's. They kept saying both heartbeats are really strong, and I thought well, that's good 'cause I'm having a baby.
[Scene: Ross and Emilys room, the next morning. Ross is now asleep and has his head in Monicas lap and his feet on Chandlers lap. Monica and Chandler are both still awake and depressed.]
(They both kiss.)
Monica: They really were pretty, werent they? (Rachel and Phoebe both agree)
Joey: They're so small! (Both he and Ross look at them with satisfied looks on their faces.)
(They both exit.)
Chandler: (quietly) Hi! (They both start kissing.)
(They both go to her apartment.)
Chandler: Yeah, we were just talking about that. I can't believe how stupid we used to look. (They both quickly push their sleeves over their elbows.)
(They both laugh as Ross heads back to the bathroom.)
Ross: Oh mom! Okay, umm, her name is Carol. And she's really pretty. And smart. And uh, she's-she's on the lacrosse team and the golf team. Can you believe it? She plays for both teams!
Phoebe: Ooh, you nailed the Old Lady! (They both laugh at what she said.)
(Rachel and Sophie both back out and close the door without saying anything.
(They both exit.)
Both: We can't do that. (They separate.)
(They both stand real close together.)
Chandler: You guys haven't actually met before, but, boy! You're both polite! (pause) Go to have a seat Zack, and I'll get you a beer.
(They both grab him and stop him.)
Joey: Hey, let's go look at it! (They both jump up.)
(They both start laughing at him.)
(Rachel grabs the bug bomb, activates it, throws it at the figure, and they both run out through the fog.)
(They both throw the scripts in his face.)
(They both start to read ahead.)
Monica: Chandler that's crazy! If you give up every time you'd have a fight with someone you'd never be with anyone longer thanOhhh! (They both realize something there.)
(They both walk off the court.)
(Both of them remove their hats as Phoebe enters.)
(They both turn around.)
Gunther: Here you go. (Serves them both some coffee.)
Ross: (happily again) You were worried about me? You didn't know how I was going to react? (He hugs them both.)
Ross: (happily) My best friend and my sister! I cannot believe this. (He hugs them both.) (To Joey and Rachel) You guys probably wanna get some hugs in too, huh? Big news!
(Raymond and Joey both eat a spoonful and Joey turns to Raymond and says )
(Chandler turns to watch her go and then sees Ross and Joey both with huge grimaces on their faces.)
(They both sprint to what used to be their apartment.)
Ross: Hey, both you guys should be up there with me. I mean, you two are-are my I mean, Im lucky to have just one good (They all start getting emotional.)
(They both run to rip the covers off the bed, but are interrupted by Ross.)
Monica: Hes retiling my floor. (they both run to the bathroom)
Rachel: Oh what, you-you want both of them?
(Joey and Chandler both run to shut off the tape.)
Rachel: Ugh! Look you guys, I'm really excited about this! Okay? I don't care what you think! I'm gonna go set up a little litter box for Mrs. Whiskerson. (They both glare at her.) Well, what am I gonna call her? Fluffy?!
(They both sit down.)
[Scene: Gary and Phoebe's apartment, it's morning and they're both waking up in bed.]
Chandler: Thats a great idea! We can easily think of a way for us both to enjoy the room.
Chandler: Made a few calls, pulled some strings, and they agreed to seat us at 11:30 if we both had the chicken and didn't get desert.
Ross: Maybe it was both of us, but we had our best friend's interest (Pauses and looks at Joey.) But we had our best friend's interest at heart.
Chandler: Oh, thats cool. Then Ill just bring them both over.
(They both bounce back into the bathroom.)
[Time lapse, they're both entering.]
(They both exit.)
(Monica and Chandler both remember a special moment between them.)
(They both sit down.)
(They both start laughing. There's a knock on the door.)
Ross: Excuse me sir, you've got a little something right here. (He points to the corner of his mouth and they both laugh.)
(They both start speaking Italian to each other, and since I'm not Italian and don't understand one word, we'll move on to the English portion of the show. Not, that I'm English. Not that there's anything wrong with that, it's just that I'm not. Y'know I think I should shut-up now and move on. Anyhoo, she says something about Joey being fat I think based on this line.)
[Scene: Rosss birthday, night has fallen and Joey and Ross are walking by where his car is parked to find that both cars blocking him in have left.]