words in movies
Chandler: You know you don't want me to help. You can't have it both ways!
Charity guy: Right. Well, on behalf of the children: thank you both very much.
Chandler: Here we go. Stand up straight. (smiling) Big smile. (opens the door and both are smiling exaggeratedly)
Rachel: The logic is, that there are two of us and we are both strong enough to break a chair in half!
Joey: Wait up! (They both run to the bathroom.)
Joey: Okay. (They both walk off to watch for Rachel.)
Monica: But my clothes areohh! (They both leave.)
(They both start to frantically rip each others clothes off, but are interrupted when Joey tries to open the door.)
Ross: Thanks guys! (They both sit down on either side of him.) I really appreciate this, yknow, but you dont have to rub my butt.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, theyre both unpacked. The big ceramic dog has found a new home in front of the window. Joey screams and runs into the living room.]
Erica: I don't think so. Although, they did mention something about two heartbeats. But I thought that was just mine and the baby's. They kept saying both heartbeats are really strong, and I thought well, that's good 'cause I'm having a baby.
[Scene: Ross and Emilys room, the next morning. Ross is now asleep and has his head in Monicas lap and his feet on Chandlers lap. Monica and Chandler are both still awake and depressed.]
(They both kiss.)
Monica: You are both idiots. The joke is not funny, and its offensive to women, and doctors, and monkeys! You shouldnt be arguing over who gets credit, you should be arguing over who gets blamed for inflicting this horrible joke upon the world! Now let it go! The joke sucks!
Joey: They're so small! (Both he and Ross look at them with satisfied looks on their faces.)
Monica: They really were pretty, werent they? (Rachel and Phoebe both agree)
Chandler: (quietly) Hi! (They both start kissing.)
(They both grab him and stop him.)
(They both go to her apartment.)
Chandler: Yeah, we were just talking about that. I can't believe how stupid we used to look. (They both quickly push their sleeves over their elbows.)
(They both laugh as Ross heads back to the bathroom.)
Joey: Hey, let's go look at it! (They both jump up.)
Ross: Oh mom! Okay, umm, her name is Carol. And she's really pretty. And smart. And uh, she's-she's on the lacrosse team and the golf team. Can you believe it? She plays for both teams!
(They both start laughing at him.)
(Rachel grabs the bug bomb, activates it, throws it at the figure, and they both run out through the fog.)
(They both throw the scripts in his face.)
(They both start to read ahead.)
(They both exit.)
Phoebe: Ooh, you nailed the Old Lady! (They both laugh at what she said.)
(They both exit.)
(Rachel and Sophie both back out and close the door without saying anything.
Both: We can't do that. (They separate.)
(They both stand real close together.)
(Chandler turns to watch her go and then sees Ross and Joey both with huge grimaces on their faces.)
Monica: Chandler that's crazy! If you give up every time you'd have a fight with someone you'd never be with anyone longer thanOhhh! (They both realize something there.)
Chandler: You guys haven't actually met before, but, boy! You're both polite! (pause) Go to have a seat Zack, and I'll get you a beer.
(They both turn around.)
(They both walk off the court.)
Gunther: Here you go. (Serves them both some coffee.)
(Both of them remove their hats as Phoebe enters.)
Ross: (happily again) You were worried about me? You didn't know how I was going to react? (He hugs them both.)
Ross: (happily) My best friend and my sister! I cannot believe this. (He hugs them both.) (To Joey and Rachel) You guys probably wanna get some hugs in too, huh? Big news!
(They both run to rip the covers off the bed, but are interrupted by Ross.)
Ross: Hey, both you guys should be up there with me. I mean, you two are-are my I mean, Im lucky to have just one good (They all start getting emotional.)
(They both sprint to what used to be their apartment.)
Monica: Hes retiling my floor. (they both run to the bathroom)
(Raymond and Joey both eat a spoonful and Joey turns to Raymond and says )
Rachel: Oh what, you-you want both of them?
Ross: Maybe it was both of us, but we had our best friend's interest (Pauses and looks at Joey.) But we had our best friend's interest at heart.
(They both sit down.)
(Joey and Chandler both run to shut off the tape.)
[Scene: Gary and Phoebe's apartment, it's morning and they're both waking up in bed.]
(They both bounce back into the bathroom.)
Chandler: Thats a great idea! We can easily think of a way for us both to enjoy the room.
Chandler: Made a few calls, pulled some strings, and they agreed to seat us at 11:30 if we both had the chicken and didn't get desert.
Rachel: Ugh! Look you guys, I'm really excited about this! Okay? I don't care what you think! I'm gonna go set up a little litter box for Mrs. Whiskerson. (They both glare at her.) Well, what am I gonna call her? Fluffy?!
Chandler: Oh, thats cool. Then Ill just bring them both over.
[Time lapse, they're both entering.]
(They both exit.)
(They both sit down.)
(Monica and Chandler both remember a special moment between them.)
(They both start laughing. There's a knock on the door.)
Ross: Excuse me sir, you've got a little something right here. (He points to the corner of his mouth and they both laugh.)
[Scene: Rosss birthday, night has fallen and Joey and Ross are walking by where his car is parked to find that both cars blocking him in have left.]
Ross: Hey! Hey! Hey! I get to choose my best man, and I want both you guys.
[Scene: Mike's parents house. Dining room again. Both Mike and Phoebe are not at the table, but the others still are.]
Chandler: Okay, make sure you look both ways before you cross the street.
(He throws it back to Ross, but it's intercepted by Monica and the guys both scream in horror.)
[Scene: Joey and Janines apartment, they both enter.]
(They both start speaking Italian to each other, and since I'm not Italian and don't understand one word, we'll move on to the English portion of the show. Not, that I'm English. Not that there's anything wrong with that, it's just that I'm not. Y'know I think I should shut-up now and move on. Anyhoo, she says something about Joey being fat I think based on this line.)
(Suddenly, theres movement beside her, startling her. Its Ross! He wakes up and they both start screaming in terror. Then they both grab their heads having aggravated their hangovers.)
Joey: Id love to show ya, but I just tucked her in. Shes sleeping. (The women both laugh) Hey uh, would you two girls like to go for a drink? (Just then the same guy with the football dives to make a catch, lands on the car cover, and collapses it. It turns out that Joey set up a bunch of boxes to make it look like a Porsche.)
Phoebe: Well look, you dont really like the one from uptown and youre too exhausted from dating the one up in Poughkeepsie, so I say you just end them both. Okay? You take a train up to Poughkeepsie and break up with her, and on your way back you break up with uptown. And then by the time you get home tonight, youre done!
[Monica and Chandler both are shocked. Ross gives Monica a take that! look.]
Rachel: Ross said my name. Okay? My name. Ross said my name up there that obviously means that he still loves me! (They both just stare at her.) Okay, dont believe me, I know Im rightdo you guys want to go downstairs and get a drink?
(They both look at her.)
(Both Chandler and Ross are eager to hear her decision.)
(They both stare at the newborn.)
Rachel: Oh, its the best! (They both exhale contemplating the joys of marriage.) So, umm hows Monica?
Chandler: Eh, theyre both good. I generally just go with, Monicas drunk again. (Monica glares at him.)
Monica: No! (They both laugh.) Oyster?
Ross: (stopping them) Okay-okay! Two very good points, look Ive known you both a long time, and Ive never seen either of you one/millionth as happy as youve been since youve got together. Do you really want to throw that all away over a room? That is so silly. Now wh-what is more important, love or silliness?
Chandler: Okay. (They both realize what he just said.)
Joey: Hi Alex! (to the director) And uh, as you can see my hands are not in my pants. (Holds them both up.)
Chandler: Okay! (They both get up.)
(They both laugh.)
Joey: But you got to be with both of them, right?
Phoebe: Now, its you little bunny friend. (She sticks it in Rachels face and they both laugh.)
(They both scream and jump away.)
(They both get out of bed and go get some cake.)
[Scene: The Medical Research office, Joey is there with Carl in the waiting room. Two identical twins come out and both wave by at the same time.]
Chandler: (thinking it over) Well, I did put a lot of thought in the tape. (They both run into the bedroom.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers bedroom, they are both getting undressed.]
Rachel: My God! (They both run into the bedrooms.)
Chandler: (laughs) Well, don�t believe everything you hear, Ken. (both turning away to files) But yeah, that�s true. Alright, let�s get started, by take a look at last quarter�s figures. (The female next to Chandler starts smoking, towards her:) Ah, Claudia, aren�t you supposed to blow smoke up the bosses� ass?
Monica: Oh its so cute. I wonder what age it is when you stop being able to put both legs over your head.
Phoebe: Alright, now I will let go if you both stop.
Rachel: Oh thats right. Youre the talker. (They both reflect on that briefly) Anyway uh, great idea! Umm, I gotta go to the store; I told him that I would buy him some more tissues.
Chandler: I got a good one, I got a good one! I once walked in on both my parents making love to the same guy.
(They both take a drink of coffee.)
Rachel: Phoebe you cant have both of them! You have to pick one!
Sarah: (approaching with two filled balloons in her hands) Nobody! We put them in here! (Indicates the aforementioned balloons causing both of them to scream in delight and start drinking from the balloons.)
(She turns her head away and when shes not looking, Phoebe shakes her head and mouths, "No, Im not." Both Joey and Ross smile, look at each other, and then stop smiling.)