words in movies
Written by: Doty Abrams Transcribed by: Eric Aasen With Scenes Taken From Episodes Transcribed by: Mindy Mattingly Phillips, guineapig, Ruth Curran, Josh Hodge, and Me.
Joey: And I know both of them, theyre really good. One of them is the guy from those allergy commercials whos always getting chased by those big flowers
Joey: Well, this guy came by to look at the unit and-and he said he didnt think big enough to fit a grown man!
Ross: It was 5:30 in the morning, and you had rambled on for 18 pages. Front and back!! (they go into the living room, trapping Monica, Chandler, and Joey in the kitchen) (to Rachel) Oh-oh-oh, and by the way, Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means you are, Y-O-U-R means your!
Ross: (starts to cry) FINE BY ME!! (he opens the door and traps Chandler behind it)
(They wrestle on the couch for a little while until Monica gets the upper hand and pulls Rachel off of the couch by her sock. Monica removes Rachel's sock and starts beating her with it.)This leads to wrestling on the floor. This finally angers Phoebe.)
(Phoebe grabs each of them by an ear.) Monica and Rachel: Ow! Ow! Ow!
[The next flashback is from The One Where No One's Ready. Joey is retaliating against Chandler hiding his underwear by wearing a whole bunch of clothes.]
[The next flashback is from The One Where Eddie Moves In. It's the sequence where Joey and Chandler are both saddened that they're not living together anymore. All By Myself is playing in the background.]
[Chandler's. He's playing foosball by himself.]
[Joey's. Playing ping pong by himself.]
Chandler: Joey? Got you a Joey Special, two pizzas! Joe? (The phone rings and he answers it) (On phone) Hello? (Takes the phone away from his mouth when he realizes what he just did and yells.) Damnit! (Back on phone.) Hello? (Listens.) No, Joeys not here right now, but I can take a message I think. (Listens) Hes still got a chance for the part?! Oh, thats great news! (Listens) Well no obviously not for the actor who was mauled by his dog. (Listens) Oh well, thats great. I will give Joey the message. Thank you! (Hangs up and goes to write the message on the Magna-Doodle.) Yes! (Reading what hes writing) Okay, Mac audition at 2:00. Allergy actor attacked. (Pause) By dog not flowers.
(Suddenly Ross jumps up from behind the counter armed with a plastic gun. By the way, hes overacting too.)
Written by: Alexa Junge Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Joey: No room? Its a baby. Its like this big. (Holds his hands about a foot apart.) Yknow, I mean you-you could you could put it over here. (A desk.) Or-or-or we could put it right here. (The chair.) Aw, its cute, right? Or-or we could put it over here. (By the bathroom door.) You wouldnt even notice it. Wheres the baby? (Mumbles that its over in the corner.)
Carol: This doesn't have anything to do with the fact that he is being raised by two women, does it?
(She hangs up, closes her phone, turns around and puts it in her bag which is in the back of the car. While doing this and not looking at the road, she turns the steering wheel by accident, which makes the car swerve.)
Rachel: He's soo lucky, if Janice were a guy, she'd be sleeping with somebody else by now.
(Everyone looks at him. He realizes he just spilled the beans about Ross's crush on Rachel. You can hear this entire classic scene by clicking here.)
Written by: Marta Kauffman & David Crane Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Ross: I have to go. Yeah, Carol should be home by now, soo...
Written by: Wil Calhoun Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Chandler: (running around the apartment pointing out things) Bedroom. Bathroom. Living room. This right here is the kitchen, and thanks for coming by, (opens door) Bye-bye.
Chandler: Well okay Jerry, thanks for stopping by.
Written by: Seth Kurland Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Joey: Well, I guess he says that because they were on a break when it happened, that she should of forgiven him by now.
Rachel: Oh Daddy, no he didnt mean anything by that, he really didnt.
Phoebe: Oh, its the compulsively neat one by the window, okay.
(Chandler walks by and Joey lets out an evil "muhahaho".)
(An embarrassed silence... finally broken by)
Written by: Brian Boyle Transcribed by: Samantha Stein
Monica: Its okay. I suppose it could happen to anyone, not anyone I know, but... By the way I can still see it.
(Monica throws the ball over Joeys head, its stopped from rolling away by a very beautiful woman.)
Chandler: Is everybody else seeing a troll doll nailed to a two by four?
Ross: Ow! Ow! Okay, okay, fine, fine! All right, you wanna win by cheating, go ahead, all right. Phoebe the touchdown does count, you win.
Ross: What?! The guys against the girls? See, thats ridiculous Monica, because Im only down by three touchdowns.
Margha: Well, if I had to chose right now, which by the way I find really weird, I would have to say, Chandler.
Joey: This sucks, I was just up by that much!
[Scene: Healing Hands Inc. (Phoebes work), Frank is being ushered in, by the arm, to the room Phoebe is in by another girl.]
Phoebe: Okay. (One of Joeys co-workers, walks by with a dead tree.) Yikes! That one doesnt look very fulfilled.
Monica: To score the winning touchdown, by the way.
Rachel: (grabs Chandler by the shirt) All right, listen, smirky. If it wasn't for you and your stupid balloon, I would be on a plane watching a woman do this (makes a gesture like a stewardess pointing out exits) right now. But I'm not.
Gunther: Do you remember when you first came here, how you spent two weeks getting trained by another waitress?
Written by: Ira Ungerleider Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Written by: Alexa Junge Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
(They all make happy faces as they are unable to express their feelings verbally. Finally, the phone rings and the race to answer it is won by Monica.)
ROSS: Well I guess you can start by drivin a cab on Another World.
Rachel: Hi! Uhh, do you guys have plans for the weekend? Because I have my sister on hold, and she said that we could use her cabin for the weekend and go skiing. Huh? Im asking you first, right?!. I mean Im playing by the rules.
[Scene: Rosss, the gang, minus Rachel of course, is there. Chandler is forced to smoke by an open window.]
Chandler: Can somebody else hug him? I have to stay by the window.
Joey: Thanks for stopping by. See ya! (Throws them out and closes the door.) (To Cecilia) I-I am so sorry. I
Chandler: Well, she spent the last six months getting over him, and now shes celebrating that by going on a date with him.
Rachel: (to Ross): So basically, you get your ya-yas by taking money from all of your friends.
Joey: Oh, hey, Chandler, we, ah, we stopped by the coffee shop and ran into Ross.
Written by: Adam Chase Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
(Robert leans back on the arm of the chair and allows Chandler to see up his shorts and sees little Robert. Chandler is horrified by this view.)
Written by: Wil Calhoun Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Phoebe: Okay, well Ill bring them by tomorrow morning. Okay, and uh, by the way, theyre not actually puppies, theyre Frank and Alices triplets. Okay, see ya! (Exits.)
Written by: Michael Borkow Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Written by: Doty Abrams Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Teleplay by: Brian Boyle Story by: Sherry Bilsing & Ellen Plummer Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Monica: Yeah, you really shouldn't. (to Ross, sarcastically) By the way, how was that year-long dig in Cairo?
Written by: Michael Borkow Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Ross: Okay here, have one of these peppers. Oh ha Oh God! So so hot! (Rubs his eyes.) Oh my(Laughs.) By the way, you dont want to touch the pepper and then touch your eye.
Originally written by Betsy Borns Transcribed by Mindy Mattingly Phillips [mmatting@indiana.edu] Minor additions and adjustments by Dan Silverstein.
Monica: Who? I mean have you seen a car come by here in the last hour and a half? I think we should call Ross, maybe he can get a car and come pick us up.
Joey: Okay, some tricks of the trade. Now, Ive never been able to cry as an actor, so if Im in a scene where I have to cry, I cut a hole in my pocket, take a pair of tweezers, and just start pulling. Or ah, or, lets say I wanna convey that Ive just done something evil. That would be the basic I have a fishhook in my eyebrow and I like it (Does it by raising one eyebrow, and showing off the pretend fishhook.) Okay, lets say Ive just gotten bad news, well all I do there is try and divide 232 by 13. (looks all confused) And thats how its done. Great soap opera acting tonight everybody, class dismissed.
(Ross goes into the room where Dr. Green is laying unconscious. He turns on the TV, puts his feet on the bed and starts watching a dinosaur movie where the dinosaur is caught by two cowboys. Dr. Geller awakes.)
Written by: Marta Kauffman & David Crane Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
(Ross turns around and sees Rachel sitting by the window. She is just glaring at him.)
Phoebe: Okay, well if I was in this for the money, Id be a millionaire by now, y'know. You just got to get out of that jingle head sweetie.
Frank: Yeah, so we just thought wed stop by and let you know theres still no pressure.
Written by: Seth Kurland Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Joey are being lectured by Phoebe.]
JOEY: Wow, look at that. The car is on fire, yet somehow it's expensive paint job is protected by the Miracle Wax.
Chandler: This ice cream tastes like crap by the way.
Video:April Twelve, Eighteen hundred, Sixty-One (Monica lights Richard's cigar butt), 4:30 A.M. on Tuesday, the United States garrison at Fort Sumter was fired upon (knock on door) it is now under bombardment by....
Chandler: (tongue-tied) Uhl..ell. By the way, in case you missed that, that sound was, "Uhl, ell."
Monica: By the way, Ross dropped by a box of your stuff.
Phoebe: (laughing and banging her spoon on the table) Knock, knock, knock, knock, hi. Um, could you please tell Sergei that um, I was fascinated by what Boutros Boutros Gali said in the New York Times.
Eric: Oh, yeah, during the summer, I spend most weekends at my sisters beach house, which you are welcome to use by the way. Although, I should probably tell you, shes a porn star. (Chandler breaks his pencil in half)
Joanna: Oh God, we just clicked! Yknow how people just click? Like he came by to pick me up, and I opened the door, and it was just like, click! Did he tell you?
Written by: Michael Curtis and Gregory S. Malins Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Mona: Hey, I went by the photo shop, take a look, here is a mockup of our card. What do you think?
Pete: (to Monica, by the door) So ah, we on for tomorrow?
Joey: Dr. Drake Remoray. Days of Our Lives. Voted most datable neurosurgeon by Teen Beat.
Phoebe: Well, it's this guy I used to massage. And by massage, I mean hold down so he wouldn't turn over and flash me.
Written by: Wil Calhoun Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Written by: Jill Condon & Amy Toomin Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Rachel: O-kay!! See what you did, Im gonna be doing it by myself now. Okay?
Ross: (To Rachel, standing by her feet) I dont know why you cant admit that you need me.
Aired: 3/13/2003 Teleplay by: Brian Buckner & Sebastian Jones Story by: Robert Carlock Directed by: Gary Halvorson Transcribed by: Eleonora, Pheeboh and Vanessa
Written by: Scott Silveri & Shana Goldberg-Meehan Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Monica: Does it have to do with-with Chandler and that sock that he keeps by his bed?
Kate: By the way, he dumped me tonight after he read my review.
Emily: Oh, no-no-no, thats not rude! Its perfectly in keeping with a trip that Ive already been run down by one of your wiener carts, and been strip-searched at John F. Kennedy Airport, apparently to you people, I look like someone whos got a balloon full of cocaine stuffed up their bum.
(He starts to exit, but Chandler tries to stop him by climbing on his back and grabbing hold of the foosball table.)
(Joey wants to know, but Chandler doesnt want to discuss it by the chick, so he and Joey move over to the windows and away from the chick.)
(They start to leave Central Perk. The band starts to play "Here, There and Everywhere" by the Beatles. The crowd rises from their seats. Phoebe and Chandler walk down the aisle. Phoebe really glows with happiness. So does Mike who watches her walk down the isle. When Phoebe and Chandler arrive, they kiss and Phoebe walks to her bridesmaids.)
Ross: (entering) Well hey! Whats going on? Ooh, cool boat(Sees why the boats there)Oh, no. (Averts his eyes by looking around the room) (To Rachel) Hey, did you, did you tell them?
(The guy turns round, startled. Monica points to Phoebe. The guy gets hit by a truck)
Rachel: Y'know I dont, I dont understand guys, I mean I-I would never congratulate Monica on a great stew by y'know, grabbin her boob.
Written by: Adam Chase Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
[Chandler and Monica are by the window pressuring Ross to tell his parents the truth.]
Written by: Adam Chase & Ira Ungerleider Transcribed by: Mindy Mattingly Phillips With Minor Adjustments by: Eric Aasen
Written by: R. Lee Fleming, Jr. Transcribed by: Eric Aasen Dutch Phrases by: Kenny Walgraef
Mark: Yeah. I can just go home and get back at him by myself.
Monica: (watching a happy couple walk by, arm in arm) Would you look at them. Am I ever gonna find a boyfriend again? I gonna die an old maid.
[Rachel comes out of her apartment, followed by Mark, and they leave on their date, without saying a word to Ross. Ross is stunned.]
Stevens: (coming back in) Oh, excuse me. I forgot my briefcase y'know, by accident.
Teleplay by: Jill Condon & Amy Toomin Story by: Andrew Reich & Ted Cohen Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
[Scene: Central Perk, the whole gang is there, Ross is telling a story about what happened at work and the rest of the gang are thinking to themselves, denoted by italics.]
Ross: (to Joey) Good morning. Nice breasts by the way.