words in movies
Part 1 written by: Shana Goldberg-Meehan & Scott Silveri Part 2 written by: Marta Kauffman & David Crane Directed by: Kevin S. Bright Transcribed by: Andreina, Eleonora, Pheeboh, Sebastiano & Vanessa
Joey: I know, there are gonna be some pasty folks by the pool tomorrow! (A woman goes towards them)
David: Still you know, a girl calls you by your ex-boyfriend's name, that-that's not a good thing, right?
Ross: (a little embarassed by their conversation) I'm good, I have dinner plans (moves away from them).
Joey: I wasn't gonna swim, I was gonna dig a hole! (removes a small plastic spade used by children to play on the beach from his backpack)
Ross: By using CT scans and computer imaging we can in a very real way, bring the Mesozoic era into the 21st century.
Ross: Oh and you know what, it will be even better tomorrow, because I won't be constantly interrupted by Joey checking to see if they put chocolates on my pillow yet. (Someone knocks on the door, Ross goes to open and it's Joey, Rachel and Chandler).
Chandler: Well, I tried Billy Jean King, but... (Ross glares at him) you know, you and Monica have the same "I'm gonna kill you" look...? I can usually make it go away by kissing her... (Ross continues to glare at him and Chandler leans in as if he's going to kiss Ross)
Ross: Alright, ok, let's do it. (Ross sits down at the desk and they all gather around him) Uhm, I know we start by discussing the shortcomings of carbon dating... uhm, and then, then I move on to what is clearly the defining moment of the Mesozoic era, the breakup of Pangea, hello! (Rachel and Joey look confused) And then, there's the... eh... there's the overview of the Triassic.
(A waiter walks by carrying appetizers or something on a tray)
Ross: I know! It's like, if you knew, why didn't you tell me, you know? I mean, call, or leave a note: "Hi, I just dropped by to say your wife's gay"
Rachel: Look at that woman sitting by the pool getting tan... so leathery and wrinkled, I'm so jealous!
Mike: (popping by, smiling) You're kidding, we wouldn't have missed it!
Mike: Oh, by the way... I'm awesome!!
Phoebe: (looking at Mike) Oh, yeah! (turning to Chandler) Are you telling me you... you're not even... a little turned on by Monica, right now?
Monica: (threatening) Don't get too cocky! Remember I won the last one! Oh, by the way, how did that feel, losing to a girl?
(Charlie walks by)
(Three paleontologists walk by and Ross hugs Charlie trying not to be seen)
Rachel: (Into microphone) Okay, hi. Ladies and gentlemen, back by popular demand, Miss Phoebe Buffay. Wooh!
JOEY: It's just that, I, I'm gonna miss Joseph. I liked him. His wife, she was hot. [Chadler pushes him out the door by the face.]
Written by: Jeff Astroff & Mike Sikowitz
Guys: Hockey! (They go to leave but are blocked by three of Rachel's friends, Leslie, Kiki, and Joanne. The guys pause to stare at them.) Hockey! Hockey. (The guys.)
Ross: Yeah, that's kinda what I meant by "bye!"
Monica and Ross: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 (Ross runs to be caught by Monica, but she moves out of the way)
Ross: Okay, the other night I was leaving the museum just as Laser Floyd was letting out of the planetarium, without even trying I sold 50 boxes! Thats when it occurred to me, the key to my success, the munchies. So I ah, started hitting the NYU dorms around midnight. I am selling cookies by the case. They call me: 'Cookie Dude!'
Rachel: Look, yknow I know my lifes going pretty well, but I look around and I just see so many people whove accomplished so many other goals by the time theyre thirty.
(There's a knock on the door which is answered by Phoebe.)
Chandler: He said...he said, he said that they're having a great time. I'm sorry. But, the silver lining, if you wanna see it, is that he made the decision all by himself! Without any outside help whatsoever.
Julie: I know, I probably shouldn't even tell you this, but I'm pretty much totally intimidated by you.
Monica: (Excited) Oh my God, can you believe we are surrounded by all this? I can barely control myself.
STRANGER: Great. Uhh, just tell her her husband stopped by. [leaves flowers on bar]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's balcony, Ross is about to be attacked by Paulo's cat.]
Originally written by Alexa Junge Transcribed by Josh Hodge.
Originally written by Michael Curtis and Greg Malins Trascribed by Mindy Mattingly Phillips With Minor Adjustments by: Eric Aasen
Dr. Long: (To Joey) Uh, if you have any questions, heres some information on Braxton-Hicks. (Hands Joey a pamphlet.) Oh and by the way, you did the right thing by bringing her in. Youre gonna make a wonderful father.
ROSS: [being drawn in by her talk] Uh-huh.
(They start kissing again, but are interrupted by the phone.
[Time Lapse, Rachel and Ross are watching a TV channel finishes it's broadcast day by playing the national anthem.]
CHANDLER: By the way, this didn't seem so dorky in the hall.
Ross: Yeah, I thought we'd be groomsmen, but wouldn't they have asked us by now? When did they ask you to be their bridesmaid?
Written by: Bill Lawrence Transcribed by: Mindy Mattingly Phillips With Minor Adjustments by: Eric Aasen
Written by: Andrew Reich & Ted Cohen Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Joey: (To a co-worker) Hey, it's not the first time I lost a girl to a cowboy spraying cologne. (A customer walks by.) Bijan for men? (The customer ignores him, and Joey starts to chase him) Bijan for men?!
Originally written by Michael Borkow Transcribed by Josh Hodge
Joey: Ahhh, I fold like a cheap hooker who got hit in the stomach by a fat guy with sores on his face. (the girls look at him, confused) Oh, I'm out.
Ross: Oh, by the way, great service tonight.
Story by: David Crane & Marta Kauffman Teleplay by: Jeff Greenstein & Jeff Strauss Transcribed by: Mindy Mattingly Phillips With Minor Adjustments by: Dan Silverstein
Written by: Alexa Junge Transcribed by: Mikael Hedberg
ROSS: Oh, Monica, I figured I'd come by tomorrow morning and pick up Fluffy's old cat toy, OK?
Originally written by Jeffrey Astroff and Mike Sikowitz Transcribed by Josh Hodge. Minor additions and adjustments by Dan SIlverstein.
Originally written by Doty Abrams Transcribed by Mindy Mattingly Phillips
Lydia: I wasn't by myself. I had a doctor, a nurse, and a helper guy. (Joey smiles) So, did you see who won the game?
RACHEL: Oh, by the way Mon, I don't think the mailman liked your cookies. Here are the ornaments your mom sent. [hands her a smashed box]
Written by: Brian Boyle Directed by: David Schwimmer Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Originally written by Alexa Junge. Trascribed by Josh Hodge.
Monica: I know! And four ninety-nine for a pillow top queen set, who cares about the divorce, those babies will sell themselves. (they all stare at her) And Im appalled for you by the way.
[Phoebe grabs each of them by an ear]
EDDIE: Oh, this is, this is unbelievable. I mean, first you sleep with my ex-girlfriend then you insult my inteligenct by lying about it and then you kill my fish, my Buddy?
Phoebe: Yeah, and theyve been coming by all day. They love it!
ROSS: Well we just wanted to stop by and uh, say goodnight.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler is playing foosball by himself, Joey enters]
Originally written by Transcribed by Joshua Hodge
Written by: Alexa Junge Transcribed by: guineapig
Originally written by Adam Chase. Transcribed by Joshua Hodge.
RACHEL: Really? You don't say, because mine was licked on by kittens.
Originally written by ???.
EDDIE: Hey Chan, is that Joey guy gonna come by and pick up his moose hat or should I just toss it out?
[Joey's. Playing ping pong by himself.]
MONICA: But I thought you wanted to live by yourself.
JOEY: Morning. I just uh, came by to pick up my mail. [looks for the mail on the table by the door, it's not there] Where's the mail?
[Scene: Chandler and Eddie's apartment. Joey stops by. Chandler is reading the paper and Eddie is fixing eggs.]
[Chandler's. He's playing foosball by himself.]
TILLY: I gather by that oh that he told you about me.
TILLY: Eddie, I just came by to drop off your tank.
Originally written by .
RICHARD: Nice moustache by the way. When puberty hits that thing's really gonna kick in.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Chandler is sleeping on the couch. Monica walks by and starts watching him.]
CHANDLER: Oh, I'm fine about my problem now, by the way.
Originally written by .
CHANDLER: Look you have to help me out here. I thought we had a deal. I thought by the time...
MR. GREENE: What? The father can't drop by to see the daughter on her birthday?
PHOEBE: Ok. Listen, just don't say anything about me, ok. [goes over and grabs the phone that's sitting by Monica]
JOEY: By someone besides Monica?
Originally written by Betsy Bornes Transcribed by Joshua Hodge. Minor additions and adjustments by Dan Silverstein.
Originally written by Alexa Junge.
Originally written by Brown Mandell.
VAN DAMME: 'Cause Rachel told me uh, you were dying to have a threesome with me and uh, Drew Barrymore. By the way, Drew has some groundrules and...
CHANDLER: Na, forget it, it's probably stripped and sold for parts by now.
Drew: Hold on, yknow I just got a box of Cubans, maybe I bring them by your office around uh, five?
Transcribed by Marita Bakken
Monica: All right, we still have a minute and a half to go, and were down by two points. Two points.... (she gets interrupted by the guys, who are doing a slow-motion high five.) Phoebe you do a button-hook again. Rachel, you go long.
[Scene: Caesar's Palace Casino, Chandler is looking for Monica while Tom Jones's signature song is playing in the background (Getting the theme yet? Tom Jones, Wayne Newton, casinos They're in Vegas people! Catch up!) It's Not Unusual, y'know, "It's not unusual to be loved by anyone! It's not unusual to have fun with anyone! But when I see you hanging about with anyone, it's not unusual to see me cry! I wanna die." Well, while that's playing he spots Monica playing craps and in victory hug the guy next to her. Chandler turns and walks out.]
MR. DOUGLAS: Have the final numbers on my desk by Tuesday.
ROSS: (using calculator) Plus tip, divided by six. Ok, everyone owes 28 bucks.
PHOEBE: I, I don't wanna meet my father over the phone. What am I gonna say, like 'Hi, I'm Phoebe, the daughter you abandoned. Oh, by the way, I broke your dog.'
[Monica pushes Ben down the aisle in a stroller. Susan is escorted by both her parents. Carol is escorted by Ross.]
Written by: Michael Curtis and Gregory S. Malins Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Written by: Alexa Junge Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
RICHARD: Hey, you're gettin' better. I'm gonna keep this by the way.
Rachel: Yeah, which, by the way Chandler, I would like back one of these days.
Rachel: Come on. (they start to leave) Oh! And, uh, by the way....
Joey: No room? Its a baby. Its like this big. (Holds his hands about a foot apart.) Yknow, I mean you-you could you could put it over here. (A desk.) Or-or-or we could put it right here. (The chair.) Aw, its cute, right? Or-or we could put it over here. (By the bathroom door.) You wouldnt even notice it. Wheres the baby? (Mumbles that its over in the corner.)
Carol: This doesn't have anything to do with the fact that he is being raised by two women, does it?
Rachel: He's soo lucky, if Janice were a guy, she'd be sleeping with somebody else by now.
(She hangs up, closes her phone, turns around and puts it in her bag which is in the back of the car. While doing this and not looking at the road, she turns the steering wheel by accident, which makes the car swerve.)
(Everyone looks at him. He realizes he just spilled the beans about Ross's crush on Rachel. You can hear this entire classic scene by clicking here.)
Written by: Seth Kurland Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Ross: I have to go. Yeah, Carol should be home by now, soo...
Chandler: Well okay Jerry, thanks for stopping by.
Written by: Marta Kauffman & David Crane Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Written by: Wil Calhoun Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Chandler: (running around the apartment pointing out things) Bedroom. Bathroom. Living room. This right here is the kitchen, and thanks for coming by, (opens door) Bye-bye.
Joey: Well, I guess he says that because they were on a break when it happened, that she should of forgiven him by now.
Rachel: Oh Daddy, no he didnt mean anything by that, he really didnt.
Phoebe: Oh, its the compulsively neat one by the window, okay.
(Chandler walks by and Joey lets out an evil "muhahaho".)
Written by: Brian Boyle Transcribed by: Samantha Stein
(An embarrassed silence... finally broken by)