words in movies
Chandler: Taste it.
Chandler: Yeah, I know, I did that two minutes ago.
Chandler: Hey, mister tux!
Chandler and
Chandler: (entering from bathroom, with an issue of Cosmo) All right, I took the quiz, and it turns out, I do put career before men. (to Joey) Get up.
Chandler: You're in my seat.
Chandler: 'Cause I was sitting there.
Chandler: Well, it's not like I went to Spain. I went to the bathroom, you knew I was coming back.
Chandler: The big deal is I was sitting there last, so, that's my seat.
Chandler: All right, Ross, I just have to do one thing, really quickly, it's not a big deal. (yells at Joey) GET UP!!
Monica: Has somebody been drinking my fat? (Joey and Chandler look at each other)
Chandler: Well, Joey, I wrote a little song today. It's called: Get Up.
Chandler: Really!
Chandler: Honey, you did call him back. 'Cause, it's, it's really old.
Chandler: You know what, okay, fine. Don't get up, you just sit right there. I just hope, you don't mind, you know, my hand right here. (holds his hand a couple of inches in front of Joey's face) Op, not touching, can't get mad! Not touching can't get mad! Not touching can't get mad! (Joey flings some dip onto Phoebe's dress)
Chandler and
Chandler: Maybe he's calling to say your obsessive and crazy.
Chandler: All right, fine, you know what, we'll both sit in the chair. (sits on Joey's lap) I'm soooo, comfortable.
Chandler: All right! (jumps up)
Ross: Okay, look, we have nineteen minutes. Okay, Chandler, I want you to go and change! Okay. And then, when you come back, Joey will go change, and he'll have vacated the chair. Okay. Okay.
Chandler: All right! Fine! I'm going. But when I get back it's chair sitting, and I'm the guy who's....sitting in a chair! (leaves)
(Chandler enters, and Joey is standing near the chair, they have a show down to see who gets the chair and Joey wins)
Chandler: Maybe it was his sister's. You know, maybe it was his daughter's.
Chandler: All right, you will notice that I am fully dressed. I, in turn, have noticed that you are not. So in the words of A. A. Milne, "Get out of my chair, dillhole!"
Chandler: What are you doing?
Chandler: The cushions are the essence of the chair!
Chandler: Oh-ho, it'll be back. Oh-ho, there's nobody in the room.
Rachel: Yeah, which, by the way Chandler, I would like back one of these days.
Chandler: We used them as pillows when we went camping.
Chandler: (shyly) The sheep.
Chandler: He took my essence!
Chandler: Well, then it looks like somebody is gonna have to give back somebody his cushions.
Chandler: What are you, what are you gonna show me my clothes?
Chandler: He's got nothing!
Chandler: What are you supporting?
Ross: Okay, hey, that's okay with me. Two down and I have exactly twelve minutes.... Wha, my watch stopped. My watch. (shows Chandler) Okay, see, the, the dinosaur tail isn't going around any more. (grabs Chandler's watch) What time is it? It's 7:33, I have seven minutes. I have seven minutes!!
Chandler: Monica, I think you've gone over to the bad place.
Chandler: (to Phoebe) You know what's weird. Donald Duck never wore pants. But whenever he's getting out of the shower, he always put a towel around his waist. I mean, what is that about?
Chandler: They got a phone in there, right?
Chandler: Is it wrong that I was totally aroused by that?
Chandler: Oh my God! That is so not the opposite of taking somebody's underwear!!
Joey: Look at me! I'm Chandler! Could I be wearing any more clothes? Maybe if I wasn't going commando...
Chandler: Oooo-ooh!
Chandler: Jeez, what a baby.
Ross: (to Joey) How 'bout instead you, go get changed! (to Chandler) You, give him back his underwear! I'm gonna go get a cab, and I want everyone down stairs in two minutes! Monica!
(Joey and Chandler start to leave, Joey is lunging as he is walking)
Chandler: Stop it. Stop it!
Chandler: Excuse me. Hi.
Chandler: Well, your kind of sitting in my seat.
Chandler: I mean, I was sitting there.
Chandler: But, I never left the room!
Chandler: All right, that's it, give me your underwear.
Chandler: Yea yea. (Pulls the balloon out of his mouth)
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Monica, Phoebe, Joey and Chandler are waiting for Ross and Rachel to come home and Monica is looking at the sign Phoebe bought that says, "Its a Boy!"]
Chandler: Walter (nods).
Chandler: Hey, what do I know? I wanted to get a bigger gorilla.
(Chandler leans over to fall asleep on the mans shoulder next to him, only the man catches his attempt.)
Chandler: Yep.
Chandler: (not knowing what hes saying yes to) Yes.
Ms. McKenna: Then, problem solved. Chandler will be running our office in Tulsa. Youre gonna love Oklahoma.
[Scene: A Boardroom, Chandlers meeting continues.]
Chandler: Hes right, if you quit this job, you then have motivation to go after a job you really want.
Chandler: All right, I have to get that, but no-no. (answering phone) Hello? (listens) (happily) Hi! Yeah listen, I'm, I'm in need of a stripper and I was told that you do that. (listens) Let me ask you this, what, what do you do for the extra hundred? (listens) So would I, would I have to provide the grapes?
[Scene: A restaurant, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Gary are on a double date. Chandler is yawning.]
Chandler: (enters) Hey.
Chandler: Okay, you know how that people say that Tulsa is the Paris of Oklahoma?
Chandler: Actually Pheebs its more of a husband and wife kinda thing
Chandler: Monica can I talk to you outside for a minute?
Phoebe: I knew I should have married Chandler.
Chandler: The Sooner State, whatever that is.
Chandler: Were moving to Tulsa! (Makes a excited expression on his face)
Monica: Chandler, I dont even wanna see the musical Oklahoma!
Chandler: People whove never ever been to Paris.
Chandler: (hears Emma crying) What is wrong with Emma?
[Scene: Ms. McKennas Office, Chandler enters.]
Chandler: Umm maam, do you have a minute? (She points for him to come in) I kind of have some bad news. I dont think I can move to Tulsa.
Ms. McKenna: Chandler, I
Chandler: Well yknow, they only give you three letters, so after A-S-S it is a bit of a challenge.
Ross: I just Bamboozled Chandler! (Flexes in victory while everyone stares at him.) Which is not uh sexual thing. That was a quick shower.
CHANDLER: I don't know, Richard's really nice and everything, uh, it's just that we don't know him really well, ya know, and plus he's, ya know, old [Monica gives him a glare] -er than some people, but, uh, younger than some buildings.
Chandler: Were moving to Tulsa
Chandler: (entering, loudly) Hey!
Chandler: Oh so there cant be any yelling.
Chandler: (enters) Hey, what you guys talking about?
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment]
Chandler: Really?
Chandler: Well, I thought if I littered, that crying Indian might come by and save us.
Chandler: They said it could be up to a year.
MONICA: [Chandler tries to come back with a smart-ass remark but can't swallow the muffin.] Quick, Phoebe, tell us before he can swallow.
Chandler: I'm sorry buddy, but I don't think I'm gonna be able to make it.
Joey: See this is what I was afraid of, I didnt think I should be here either but somebody (Looks at Chandler) said hed be over it by now.
Chandler: (Enters) Hey!
Chandler: I've got good news!
Chandler: Okay, I have news. You don't have to move to Tulsa. You can stay here and keep your job.
[SCENE: Chandler and Monica's apartment]
Chandler: I'm sorry, are you just used to saying that?
Chandler: Really?
Chandler: Hey, you said that without gagging!
Chandler: Mm! Night Gar! (Monica closes the door.)
Chandler: He saw a therapist?
Chandler: (entering) Hey Monica, here's your broom back.
Chandler: I know what she's talking about.
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment]
Rachel: Chandler, that's not enough. I mean what if she gets you a great present, two medium presents, and a bunch of little presents? And you've just gotten her one great present? I mean that's just gonna make her feel bad. Why would you do that to her Chandler? Why? Why?
Chandler: Looking for restaurant jobs for you in Tulsa.
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment]
(Phoebe and Rachel go to the back room and Emma continues to cry in the background while Chandler and Monica talk.)
Chandler: Hey!
(Monica Enters. Chandler is in the kitchen with his laptop)
Chandler: No, if crazy plate lad.. <sees Monica frustrated at this comment> If Monica dies then I would get Emma, Right?
Bob: Its Bob actually. Hey, you work up here, can you tell me where this Chandler Bings office is?
Chandler: What?
Chandler: How far outside?
Chandler: Honey, we're leaving tomorrow you've still got a lot of packing to do.
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment]
Chandler: I think you should take the job.
Monica: I'm gonna miss this hand! Okay I know it's a lot to ask, but oh my God Chandler, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Chandler: All right. Yes. Okay. I get your point. But if its not your bra will you just let the woman clean the apartment?!
Chandler: There is nothing like the support of your loving wife, huh?
Joey: Do you mind crouching down a little bit, so that I look taller? (Chandler does so) There you go. (And they walk down the red carpet.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is holding a book as she, Rachel, and Monica drink some tea as Chandler looks on.]
Chandler: Actually what?
Chandler: Well, you got here just in time. I really have to go buddy. (They hug)
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment]
Joey: Hey OK great, what would you do if I did this? (Swings to punch Chandler, he moves and he ends up punching Ross, knocking him off the stool. Ross then gets up and just stares at Joey.)
Monica: (Runs out to the hallway) Chandler, wait. It goes: Old job, (Raises her hand) new job, (Raises her hand really high) you. This is just something I have to do.
Chandler: Of course I will call you. I love you.
Phoebe: Bye Chandler.
Chandler: Awww. (They hug) Bye!
Chandler: I know that too. (They kiss)
Chandler: I know.
Monica: Chandler, we still havent gotten an RSVP from your dad.
Chandler: Well, bye Mon, bye Ross, Rachel, bye Emma!
Phoebe: Okay, bye-bye! (Pushes Chandler out the door.) Good trip! (Slams the door)
Chandler: What?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, they're entering to find boxes strewn about the apartment.]
<Chandler gives a look that says "Yeah!">
Joey: Alright thanks, Oh hey have you talked to Chandler?
Chandler: That was not a security blanket! That was a wall-hanging!
Chandler: So if Monica's not around, then I'm not good enough to raise Emma?
Chandler: DO NOT DISTURB DO NOT DISTURB! Monica: (smiles)
[Scene: Chandler arrives home from work.]
Chandler: Ok honey. that was close.
Monica:: Yes! Chandler Watches Shark Porn!
Chandler: Authorization? I don't need that. I'm gonna put everything back.
Rachel: (entering) Hey! Ross and I were looking for you! What are we all doing in here? (Looks at Chandler) Oh, my! (Covers the spot where Joey wants bubbles to be replaced.)
Chandler: No-no-no-no. (Waves him away as Monica and Phoebe enter whispering to each other.) Hey! (Monica shushes him.)
Chandler: oh it was great.
Chandler: Hi honey I'm home!
[Scene: Chandler arrives home and Monica's got a video of Sharks ready for Chandler.]
CHANDLER: So, you uh, you think that Speed Racer guy gets a lot of tickets er?
Chandler: no they don't