words in movies
Chandler: That's sweet, Joey.
Chandler: Are you aware that you're still talking?
Chandler: No-no-no! I am the king of bad Thanksgivings. You can't just swoop in here with your bad marriage and take that away from me.
Joey: Oh, come on! I wanna hear it! It wouldn't be Thanksgiving without Chandler bumming us out!
Chandler: It's a tradition, like the parade. If the parade decided it was gay, moved out, and abandoned its entire family.
[Scene: The Bing household, Mr. and Mrs. Bing and Young Chandler are eating Thanksgiving dinner as a housekeeper serves them.]
Mrs. Bing: Now Chandler dear, just because your father and I are getting a divorce it doesn't mean we don't love you. It just means he would rather sleep with the house-boy than me.
The Housekeeper: More turkey Mr. Chandler? (And he makes eyes at him.)
Chandler: Really? Worse than, "More turkey Mr. Chandler?"
Chandler: It's exactly like it sounds.
Joey: I put it on to scare Chandler!
(They both pull but Joey slips out and starts to fall backwards just as Chandler enters, scaring him.)
Chandler: Arghhhhhh!! (Joey turns around to taunt him, but Chandler is in the doorway and Joey is facing the kitchen.)
Chandler: I'm over here big guy.
Joey: (turning all the way around, and still not facing Chandler) Yeah, you are! (Starts dancing.) I scared you!
Chandler: (laughing) You did look like an idiot.
Chandler: Oh, come on Monica, reliving past pain and getting depressed is what Thanksgiving is all about. Y'know, for me anyway. And of course, the Indians.
(He brought home Chandler for Thanksgiving. Chandler is sporting the very popular Flock of Seagulls haircut. Yeah, it's another you have to see it to believe it kinda thing.)
Ross: Uh, everyone, this is Chandler! My roommate and lead singer of our band!
Chandler: (seeing her) Okay.
Mrs. Geller: I'm so glad you could come Chandler, we've got plenty of food so I hope you're hungry.
Ross: Oh, mom. Mom. Chandler hates Thanksgiving and doesn't eat any Thanksgiving food.
Fat Monica: Umm, Chandler, if you want I can make you some macaroni and cheese for dinner.
Chandler: Well, as long as the pilgrims didn't eat it, I'm in.
(Ross points out Rachel to Chandler and goes over to talk to her. Rachel is checking out her nose in her compact mirror.)
[Time lapse, dinner has finished and Chandler is sitting on the couch eating some pie. Monica sits down beside him, and he gets pushed up a little by the wave she makes in the couch.]
Fat Monica: Hey Chandler! Did you like the macaroni and cheese?
Chandler: Oh yeah, it was great. You should be a chef.
[Cut to the kitchen, Ross and Chandler are doing the dishes.]
Chandler: Emotional Knapsack?
Chandler: Right on! Oh! Uh, but, dont take to long okay? 'Cause uh, we're gonna test out our fake ID's tonight, right Clifford Alverez.
Chandler: Dude, don't do that too me!
Chandler: No, it's not that, I just don't want to be stuck here all night with your fat sister.
Chandler: I called you fat?! I don't even remember that!
Chandler: I am so sorry. I really am. I was an idiot back then. I rushed the stage at a Wham concert for crying out loud!
Chandler: I am really sorry. That is so terrible. I am so, so sorry.
Chandler: We wanna hear Monica's Thanksgiving story!
(She opens the door to reveal Chandler and Ross. Unfortunately, they seem to have their holidays mixed up. They think it's Halloween and they're going as Crockett and Tubbs from that legendary TV show of the late 80's, Miami Vice. God, we looked silly back then!)
Mr. Geller: (To Chandler) God, your hair sure is different!
Chandler: Yeah, we were just talking about that. I can't believe how stupid we used to look. (They both quickly push their sleeves over their elbows.)
Monica: Hi, Chandler.
Chandler: Oh my God!
Chandler: You just, you look so different! Terrific! That dress! That body!
Chandler: Sorry!
Monica: So Chandler, I guess I'll see you at dinner.
(She heads for the kitchen and Chandler watches her leave and admires the view.)
Chandler: Sorry.
Rachel: Yeah? Okay! Good, good, because he's coming. He's coming. (To Chandler) Hey, what's up? (She leaves and closes the door behind her.)
Chandler: Monica, I was wondering if you can make me some of that righteous mac and cheese like last year.
Chandler: Okay.
Chandler: Are you all right?
[Scene: The hospital, Chandler has been rushed to the emergency room.]
Chandler: What?
Chandler: Without my toe?! I need my toe!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is reacting to the story.]
Chandler: That's why I lost my toe?! Because I called you fat?!
Chandler: That's why for an entire year people called me Sir Limps-A-Lot?!
Chandler: Yeah, well, I miss the tip! It's the best part. It has the nail. (He storms out.)
Monica: Chandler! (Follows him out.)
[Cut to the hallway, Chandler is standing in front of his door.]
Chandler: I can't believe this.
Monica: Chandler, I said I was sorry.
Chandler: Yeah, well, sorry doesnt bring back the little piggy that cried all the way home! I hate this stupid day! And everything about it! I'll see you later.
Monica: Oh wait, Chandler, come here is there anything I can do? Anything?
Chandler: Yeah, just leave me alone for a while. (He goes into his apartment.)
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's, Chandler is sitting on one of the chairs and the duck is running around him and quacking.]
Chandler: Oh-oh, I'm a duck! I go, "Quack, quack!" Im happy all the time!
(There's a knock on the door and Chandler gets up to answer it. He opens the door to reveal Monica with a turkey over her head.)
Chandler: Nice try.
Chandler: Look, Monica
Chandler: This is not going to work.
Monica: I bet this will work! (She starts dancing and Chandler cracks up.)
Chandler: You are so great! I love you!
Chandler: Nothing! I said, I said "You're so great" and then I just, I just stopped talking!
Chandler: No I didn't!
Chandler: No I didn't!
Chandler: No I don't! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!
Chandler: I'm trppd... in an ATM vstbl... wth Jll Gdcr!
Chandler: And youre our age. Youre our age.
Chandler: Thats not a state Joe.
Chandler: Youre our age!
Chandler: Unless Snoopy says it to Charlie Brown, I think we're okay.
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler and Ross are returning from working out.]
Chandler: Ross! You gotta stop! Okay?! You cant just stare through the peep hole for three hours! Youre gonna get peep eye!
Chandler: Is there any chance you didnt see that?
Chandler: Okay.
Chandler: You didnt just break up.
Chandler: No!! You cant!!
Chandler: Stop what?!
Chandler: Look man!
Chandler: Okay.
Chandler: I know. (He rubs Rosss head)
Chandler: And hats off to Phoebe. Quite a competitor. (Pause) And might I say your breasts are still showing.
Chandler: Ah, I fooled around with Joeys sister. (Phoebe gasps) Well, thats not the worst part.
Chandler: I think somebody has a crush on somebody.
Chandler: Listen to me!! (Chandler turns him around and closes and holds the door shut with his feet.)
Chandler: Im talking about you. You big, big freak.
Chandler: Oh good, because uh we got Rachel 800 gallons of water.
Chandler: Cause its-its not his last name.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is in the kitchen chopping vegetables. Chandler and Phoebe are sitting in the living room.]
Chandler: Okay, lets play my game now.
Chandler: So, ahh, what kind of powers would Gold Man have?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Joey are there.]
Chandler: Wait a minute, wait. Youre telling me this actress person is the only woman you ever wanted who didnt want you back?!
(Ross starts stuffing pinecones in the suitcase. As the receptionist walks in, Chandler makes a bird's verse and Ross stops)
Joey: Yeah! Oh my God! (to Chandler) Is this what its like to be you?
Chandler: My Grandmother used to say that exact same thing to me.
[Chandler crumples up his cigarette pack and throws it on the ground.]
Chandler: Thats the stuff! (quickly grabs it)
Chandler: Hey.
[Scene: Rachels office, Chandler and her are coming back from lunch.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is desperately trying to make his Valentines Day gift. He takes a paper cup, turns it upside down, sticks two pencils into the top, and hangs a coat hanger from the bottom.]
Chandler: Yes, I realise that.
Chandler: Oh, thats-thats okay, no problem. (He starts to look around her office.)
Rachel: Thanks for lunch, Chandler. Y'know, you didnt have to walk me all the way back up here.
Rachel: (introduces them) Joanna, this is my friend Chandler Bing (to Chandler) Joanna.
Kathy: Oh! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Yes! Thank you! (Runs back to Chandler)
Rachel: Bye, Chandler.
Chandler: Hello.
Rachel: Oh, sorry. I meant Chandler.
Rachel: Oh thank you, Chandler, this is so great, shes gonna love me.
Chandler: How can I dump this woman on Valentine's day?
Chandler: Yeah, she seemed cool, attractive. Ill do it.
Chandler: (entering) Hey, my Fathers house does that!
Joanna: Chandler is fantastic!!
Chandler: No. This is just part of a dare devil game that I play called wait until the last moment before I burst and die.
Chandler: (holding a tissue) And is this in case the house sneezes?
CHANDLER: Oh, I thought that's what they used to cover Connecticut when it rained.
ROSS: I know, I know, it's, it's almost...[turns around, sees Chandler and Joey] What do you say we go take a walk, just us, not them?
Chandler: Thats what you say at the end of a date.
Chandler: Multiple, so many paper cuts.
Chandler: (sarcastic) Oh, well give me the phone then.
Chandler: Nooo!! Shes really dull! And she gets this gross mascara goop thing in the corner of her eye!
Rachel: Why hasnt he called Rachel? Why? Why? I dont understand. Why? He said hell call. Why? Why? Chandler Im telling you she has flipped out, shes gone crazy!
Chandler: Thats just a lot of big talk, y'know.
Chandler: Oh, I can uh, check that for ya.
(He starts to exit, but Chandler tries to stop him by climbing on his back and grabbing hold of the foosball table.)
Rachel: Oh, I dont know. Well maybe its just the idea of Barry for the rest of my life. I dont know I think I feel like I need to have one last fling, y'know, just to sorta get it out of my system. (Chandler is listening in very intensely)
Chandler: (He looks over at Rachel, who nods her head) Yes, this, this was pleasant.
Chandler: The food there was, was great.
Chandler: Noo!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is playing Hide-and-Go-Seek with the chick and the duck.]
Chandler: Its not a big deal. Its, just its right here, (points to his eye) and its all the time.
Chandler: So take care.
Rachel: Chandler!!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is waiting for Janice to arrive, and is angrily fllipping through a magazine.]
Chandler: Look, Im sorry. Okay? Im weak, and pathetic, and sorry.
Rachel: (whispering) Chandler!! Are you gonna call her!
Chandler: AhhhhIm not going to call you.
Chandler: Well, this was great. Ill give you a call. We should do it again sometime. (Rachel is disappointed)
Chandler: Yeah, o-okay.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is talking on the phone.]
(Chandler catches the ball and starts to run upfield.)
Chandler: Well this is great! Ill give you a call! We should do it again sometime!
Chandler: Hey.
Chandler: No way!
Chandler: Oh my God! Whos gonna watch that?!
Chandler: Okay, you guys spend waaaay too much time together. (Goes back inside and shuts the door)
Chandler: Oh-ho, it'll be back. Oh-ho, there's nobody in the room.
Chandler: Could be Casey.
Chandler: Yeah. (they start to leave)
Chandler: Thanks. (He takes off the vest and throws it on the floor.)
(Chandler opens the door, finally.)
Chandler: Wait. Before we go in, I just want you to know I love you. I had a great time on our honeymoon, and I cant wait to go in there and spend the rest of our life together.
Chandler: You!
[Cut to Chandler entering his and Monicas apartment alight with a thousand candles in The One With The Proposal.]
Chandler: I think youll find if I come to work here, I dont micro-manage. I dont shy away from delegating.
Chandler: Hey!
Chandler: Okay, so I guess thats about ah, two weeks before the topless thing kicks in.
Monica: Oh!! (hits Chandler and Joey in the head) You guys knew about this and you didnt tell us?!
Chandler: Hey.
Chandler: She?
Chandler: You dont think I get up when you get up?
Chandler: Excuse me?
Chandler: I stayed home from work today while you were at rehearsal so somebody could be here with our chick!
Chandler: Hey!
Chandler: And you dont think taking care of our chick is work?