words in movies
Chandler: Hey.
Chandler: And this from the cry-for-help department. Are you wearing makeup?
Chandler: That's so funny, 'cause I was thinking you look more like Joey Tribbiani, man slash woman.
Chandler: Do you know which one you're gonna be?
Chandler: Good luck, man. I hope you get it.
Monica: And I assume, Chandler, you are still boycotting all the pilgrim holidays.
Chandler: Yes, every single one of them.
Chandler: I thought it was $98.50.
Chandler: I'd just like to say that I'm totally behind this experiment. In fact, I'd very much like to butter your head.
Monica: (hands Chandler a bag) Chandler, here you go, got your traditional Thanksgiving feast, you got your tomato soup, your grilled cheese fixin's, and your family size bag of Funyuns.
Rachel: Wait, wait, Chandler, this is what you're havin' for Thanksgiving dinner? What, what, what is it with you and this holiday?
Chandler: All right, I'm nine years old.
Chandler: We just finished this magnificent Thanksgiving dinner. I have--and I remember this part vividly--a mouthful of pumpkin pie, and this is the moment my parents choose to tell me they're getting divorced.
Chandler: Yes. It's very difficult to appreciate a Thanksgiving dinner once you've seen it in reverse.
Chandler: Tonight, on a very special Blossom.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is cooking Thanksgiving dinner. Chandler is standing in the doorway, not wanting to participate in the festivities.]
Chandler: Oh, you must stop shooping.
Joey: Chandler, will you just come in already?
Chandler: No, I prefer to keep a safe distance from all this merriment.
Chandler: Ok, we all laughed when you did it with the stuffing, but that's not funny anymore.
(Chandler leaves.)
(Chandler enters, running.)
Chandler: The most unbelievable thing has happened. Underdog has just gotten away.
Chandler: No, no, the actual cartoon character. Of course the balloon. It's all over the news. Right before he reached Macy's, he broke free and was spotted flying over Washington Square Park. I'm goin' to the roof, who's with me?
Chandler: Come on. An 80-foot inflatable dog let loose over the city. How often does that happen?
Chandler: Do either of you have the keys?
Chandler: (sarcastic) For an emergency just like this.
Rachel: (grabs Chandler by the shirt) All right, listen, smirky. If it wasn't for you and your stupid balloon, I would be on a plane watching a woman do this (makes a gesture like a stewardess pointing out exits) right now. But I'm not.
Chandler: Ok, Monica, only dogs can hear you now, so, look, the door's open. Here we go.
Chandler: Now this feels like Thanksgiving.
Chandler: Shall I carve?
Chandler: Ok, who wants light cheese, and who wants dark cheese?
Chandler: I'd like to propose a toast. Little toast here, ding ding. I know this isn't the kind of Thanksgiving that all of you all planned, but for me, this has been really great, you know, I think because it didn't involve divorce or projectile vomiting. Anyway, I was just thinking, I mean, if you'd gone to Vail, and if you guys'd been with your family, if you didn't have syphilis and stuff, we wouldn't be all together, you know? So I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm very thankful that all of your Thanksgivings sucked.
Chandler: Here, here!
CHANDLER: Yeah. So do we need to hug here or. . .
CHANDLER: Hey.
CHANDLER: Yeah me too.
CHANDLER: Lick away my man.
CHANDLER: What?
CHANDLER: So I got ya something. [tosses Joey a bag of plastic spoons]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler is at the bar and Joey enters.]
CHANDLER: No-no, I mean what, what's this about your new place?
CHANDLER: Well, there you go.
CHANDLER: I did pay for half of it.
CHANDLER: Well I didn't think that was serious. [grabs the spoons back] Ya know I thought that was just a fight.
CHANDLER: Congratulations. [Chandler leaves]
CHANDLER: Thanks.
CHANDLER: Yeah, right, yeah, I guess so.
CHANDLER: [quietly] Yeah, I remember.
CHANDLER: So, uhh, em, you want me to uh, give you a hand with the foosball table?
[Everyone except Joey and Chandler leave.]
JOEY: Hey, how come, uhh, Chandler didn't come?
(Cut to Chandler and a woman, Andrea, reaching for the same slice of meat)
Chandler: (peeping) They're out there!
Chandler: Yeah, never cheat on Rachel.
JOEY: Hey. [Phoebe takes off, Joey and Chandler are thrown back in the seat]
(Joey and Chandler shoot each other glances)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Joey and Chandler enter with Chandler covering his eyes and Joey leading him.]
CHANDLER: Listen, I'm, I'm sorry I didn't make it over there today.
CHANDLER: Hey.
CHANDLER: Yeah well, I hear the place looks great.
CHANDLER: That's right my friend. It's time for...
CHANDLER: Yeah I just... wanted to call and say hey.
PHOEBE: Joey, why don't you talk to Chandler about moving back?
CHANDLER: But we had one of the greatest talks we ever had last night. I mean it was, it was like when we first started living together.
[Scene: Chandler's apartment. Chandler is sitting between Rachel and Ross.]
CHANDLER: [reaches for the footrest lever] Do we dare?
CHANDLER: But...
RACHEL: Look, Chandler, he has moved on, OK, you have to too.
[Scene: A fancy restraunt (Marcel's). Joey, Ross, Chandler, Susie, and the Director's Assistant are there.]
CHANDLER: Well, uh, why don't you ask him yourself. Joey, this is my new roommate Eddie.
Chandler: Wait a minute, its perfect. We got a lot of time to kill and were in a building thats full of beds!
CHANDLER: So uhh, how's the palace?
CHANDLER: Oh, uhh, actually I uh, have some news.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Joey is making marinara sauce and filling every container in sight. Chandler enters.]
CHANDLER: Well yeah, in that it's not being used and I... have it to spare.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning. Chandler is sitting and staring at his phone. Monica enters and creeps up next to Chandler.]
Chandler: I think I know what you mean though...the lamp is the hotel's, but the bulbs (goes to take the bulb)...oh, you already got that.
CHANDLER: For a minute there I thought you were actually tryin' to smell something.
CHANDLER: Morning.
CHANDLER: See ya. [Eddie leaves]
CHANDLER: What?
CHANDLER: Oh it's uh, over there on the table.
CHANDLER: Oh, ooh.
CHANDLER: No, Eddie likes to keep it over there.
RACHEL: [comes up from behind the bar and startles Chandler] Hey. I've got something that's gonna make you happy. Guess what Gunther found? [holds up Chandler's bracelet]
Chandler: Well, yeah... 's'no Brian in Payroll.
CHANDLER: Oh, I couldn't be happier.
CHANDLER: Well I do, but uh, Eddie makes them this way and, well they're pretty darn good.
CHANDLER: Well I like both eggs equally.
CHANDLER: Alright, so what's it about?
CHANDLER: There's another carton right over there.
[Scene: Chandler and Eddie's apartment. Joey stops by. Chandler is reading the paper and Eddie is fixing eggs.]
Chandler: Actually, this is for Kathy's birthday. It's an early edition of her favorite book.
Joey: Oh! Oh-oh, you gotta pick Joey! I mean, name one famous person named Chandler.
CHANDLER: Yeah, but uh, it was 1982 and my flock of seagulls haircut was tickling her chin.
CHANDLER: Hey Eddie, you uh, wanna play some foosball?
CHANDLER: You don't like that show?
Chandler: Hey, you're gonna be fine. You're one of the most caring, most responsible men in North America. You're gonna make a great dad.
PHOEBE: Chandler.
CHANDLER: God that is good TV.
(Joey runs off down the hall. Ross tries Monica and Rachel's apartment, but it is locked so he has to stand in the hall and pretend he wasn't listening. Chandler and his mom come out)
CHANDLER: How long you been waitin' to say that?
CHANDLER: Ah he's a, he's not a big fan of foosball.
Chandler: And was the curse lifted?
CHANDLER: That was so lame.
Chandler: Oh, uh.. I want her to think I might be in a restaurant.. y'know? I might have some kind of life, like I haven't been sitting around here honing for the past few hours.
CHANDLER: Well it's not Sean Penn.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica is still very sick and is entering the living room from the bathroom wearing a robe. Chandler is reading a magazine.]
Chandler: I can't believe you would actually say that. I would much rather be Mr.Peanut than Mr.Salty.
CHANDLER: Oh.
CHANDLER: Hi.
CHANDLER: Oh, oh, c'mon in.
CHANDLER: Bit country? C'mon in here you roomie.
CHANDLER: Bye.
CHANDLER: Yes. Hey, can I ask you, is Eddie a little...
CHANDLER: So, we gettin' a fish?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler and Joey are lamenting about how they kicked Ross out.]
CHANDLER: No he's, he's alright, just uh, he spends most of his time in his room.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler and Joey are playing Richard at foosball.]
Chandler: (looking around at the others)I'll ask. (To Ross) Boohaki?
CHANDLER: Eddie, I didn't sleep with your ex-girlfriend.
CHANDLER: There was no fish when she dropped it off.
CHANDLER: Buddy?
[Scene: Chandler and Eddie's apartment.]
Chandler: Wow, this is serious. Ive never known you to pay money for any kind of capade.
CHANDLER: Well, how could anyone not be in love with Yasmine Blepe?
CHANDLER: Could you get us a couple of beers?
[Scene: Chandler's apartment. Chandler and Joey are playing foosball for the table.]
CHANDLER: Oh really, I didn't know they had foosball in the 1800's.
Monica: Chandler! (Joey and his grandmother shush them and wave them away, which they do.) Okay, let me get this straight, it's okay for you to flirt, but not for me.
RACHEL: Chandler honey, I'm sorry. Ok, can we watch Joey's show now please? [they turn on the TV]
CHANDLER: Because sometimes, Phoebe after you sleep with someone, you have to kill the fish.
CHANDLER: Oh, I'm fine about my problem now, by the way.