words in movies
Charlie: (to Gunther) Excuse me, I'm looking for someone. You don't, by any chance, know a Ross Geller?
Charlie: Oh, hi. I'm professor Wealer.
Charlie: It's a... It's good to meet you! Thank you so much for taking the time out to show me around.
Charlie: And, by the way, I really enjoyed your paper on the connection between geographic isolation and rapid mutagenesis.
Ross: (hitting Monica with his suitcase) (to Charlie) We should probably get going, you know, we got a lot of ground to cover.
Charlie: Oh, ah, isn't there another professor that is supposed to come with us?
Charlie: I'm pretty sure, professor Spafford from Cornell?
Charlie: You don't think we should wait for him?
[Scene: Ross, Charlie and Professor Spafford are sitting at the table in a restaurant]
Ross: (very bored, he tries to avoid the conversation speaking to Charlie) So, where did you get your undergraduate degree?
Ross: (to Charlie) Oh, it's not over!
Charlie: Kinda playing fast and loose with the word "interesting".
Charlie: Oh my God!!
Charlie: Let's ditch him!
Charlie: Come on, he's still in the bathroom! I'm begging you!
Charlie: Stop it, stop it! He talks slow but he might pee fast! Ok, let's go!! (they run outside)
Ross: (entering with Charlie) Oh, hey you guys! This is Charlie! Charlie, this is Phoebe and my sister, Monica.
Ross: Yeah, Charlie is gonna be joining my department.
Charlie: Well, I think he's a little out there, but he does have some interesting ideas...
Charlie: (her mobile phone rings) Oh, I'm sorry. I'll take this. Excuse me. (she cuts herself off for a moment)
Monica: And I don't know if you've noticed but she's a (aloud) HOTTY!! (Charlie looks at her) HI!
Charlie: Oh, Newcastle disease is a secretion borne virus that only affects chickens and... other poultry.
Ross: I'm sorry, Rachel, this is Charlie Wealer, she's a collegue.
Charlie: I thought you came to say you were sick.
Joey: (to Charlie after covering himself up again) Nice to meet ya! (Charlie waves hesitantly and Joey leaves)
(cut to Ross and Charlie)
Ross: (to Charlie) So, eh... it's probably gonna be hard for you to leave Boston, huh?
Charlie: Actually, I'm kinda happy to be leaving... I just broke up with someeone.
Charlie: Actually, Alby is the guy I broke up with.
Charlie: Yeah...
Charlie: Yeah, well, he is a brilliant man.
Charlie: Yes! And while that is everything one looks for in a boyfriend, he had a lot of issues...
Ross: (very interested) Oh! like what?! (Charlie looks at him confused, but smiling) Oh I'm sorry, I don't mean to pry... it's just that this must be what regular people experience when they watch "Access Hollywood".
Charlie: Ok, you want the dirt? Alby was seriously insecure. I mean, he was really intimidated by the guy I dated before him.
Charlie: A guy who won two.
Charlie: Yeah... for three years.
Charlie: (smiling and thinks for a moment)... no... bu but there was my first boyfriend Billy.
Charlie: No, but he did just win the McArthur genius grant.
Rache: How is it going with Charlie?
Phoebe: Go Charlie! But my point is, ok so she dated them but she also broke up with them. Maybe she's looking to, you know, slum it with some average Joe Phd.
(Rachel goes look for Joey. She sees him and Charlie kissing passionately.)
Ross: (to Rachel) Hey Rach, have you seen Charlie anywhere?
(Rachel just stands there staring at Joey and Charlie in silence. After a while, Ross turns around and sees them.)
Charlie: Oh I can't... I have seminars all day and I promised Ross I would look at his speech.
Charlie: (talking to Ross) I feel like I owe you an explanation. I don't ordinarily go around kissing guys at parties. I'm... well, I'm kind of embarrassed. I really hope you don't think less of me.
Charlie: Oh, this is such a cute picture of Emma. And is this your son... or just some kid whose picture you bring on vacation?
Charlie: No, it's just... I was enganged to a guy who turned out to be gay!
Charlie: Benjamin Hobart is administering that grant.
Joey: Whoo, whoo. Wow, it's uhm... kinda weird that I'm sitting next to Charlie after we broke up.
[Scene: Hotel's bar. Ross is running to Charlie trying not to be seen with two cocktails in his hands. She's hidden behind a huge plant]
Rachel: What? Ross and Charlie? (Joey nods) Wow! She's really making her way through the group, huh? Ah, who am I to talk?
Chandler: Hello? Hello? Oh, hey Charlie. Did anybody else hear? ... What? Susan got it?? How? Oh man, I would have slept with him!! .. Alright, bye. (hangs up)
Ross: (standing) Ok, gentlemen! Please! Aren't we a little old for this? I mean, we're scientists, right? We're academics. And most importantly I... you-you will have to catch us first. (he starts to run away with Charlie). GO, GO, GO! (the paleontologists starts chasing them)
[Scene: Central Perk. Charlie is sitting on the couch and Ross enters.]
Charlie: Joey is a great guy, but we're just... so different! I mean, during your speech he kept laughing at homo erectus!
(Ross goes towards Charlie, who's conversing with a fellow paleontologist, and touches her shoulder to get her attention)
Charlie: So, shall we?
Charlie: Ah, well, unless it's the creepy guy with his hand up his kilt, I'm gonna say congratulations!
Charlie: Ooh... Is it because of what might be on the bedspread, because I saw that news report too, with the infra red and the ... I could just...
Charlie: Benji isn't in love with me. I mean, he broke up with me. And besides, he's a very ethical man.
Charlie: Oh, Ross, you gave a B to a Pottery Barn catalogue.
Charlie: Me too. (she and Benjamin are hugging for very long and Ross starts pretending to clear his throat, until they stop)
Charlie: No, no, we ended up in great terms. I mean, if anything, I think this could help you. You know what? Why don't we all go out to dinner together, and I can introduce you.
Charlie: So I am just so excited to be here. And I can't wait to start exploring the city!
[Scene: Ross's apartment. Rachel, Joey and Charlie are eating fajitas when Ross enters from the kitchen.]
Joey (to Rachel): Dude, chill! (to Ross) Okay, we also kissed in Barbados, but we didn't plan it, okay? And the only reason that that happened was because I saw you kissing Charlie.
(Charlie kisses Ross, they stop for a moment and then he kisses her back)
Charlie: You know, actually I'm a little surprised to myself. I mean, Joey is so different from the guys I usually date. I mean, they're all professors, and intellectuals, and paleontologists mostly, you know, very cerebral...
Joey: Oh, c'mon, I mean, there's you, then there's Charlie, and it's like... (sighs) What the hell is my problem? OH! (He falls back on the bed)
Charlie: Ross, why don't you tell Benji about your proposal, while I go to the ladies room?
[Scene: Joey's apartment, Joey and Ross in the living room, rehearsing what Joey will say to Charlie in the Museum]
Charlie: Oh, well, we can go see the Chronos Quartet at the Avery Fisher Hall.
Charlie: You blew them away!
Charlie: Umh... Kurts Baley?
[Scene: Central Perk. Some time later that day. The group has left and Charlie is there when Ross enters.]
Monica: Not until you said it. Somebody switch! (Chandler makes a clicking sound with his fingers and Phoebe runs to the other wall. Monica returns to Chandlers wall.) Wait a minute... Ross and Charlie, Joey and Rachel, Phoebe and Mike! We're the only people leaving with the same person we came with.
Charlie: Oh yeah! Hey, save the cork and then we can fill the bottle with water and put it back so they don't charge you.
(they all put their ear against the wall to be able to hear what's being said. We move to Ross's room where he and Charlie are kissing.)
Charlie: Please, I've been crazed all day! I had a meeting with the Dean, and my syllabus for summer school is due and I'm writing the Foreword for a friend's book...
Charlie: Mmh... he does have a pretty serious latex fetish.
Joey: (to Charlie) I think I've been recognized, this happens all the time!
Charlie: And there is a collection of Walt Whitman letters on display at the public library.
Charlie: (smiling broadly) I was not!
Charlie: There's an indoor pool, you can swim there! (Ross agrees)
Chandler: Unless Snoopy says it to Charlie Brown, I think we're okay.
[Scene: Ross' apartment. Ross is grading papers. Charlie approaches him.]
Charlie: Wait. Are you talking about the Dewar grant?
Charlie: Yeah, it's fun (hesitating).
Benjamin: I've come here to apologize. I think I may have let my feelings for Charlie interfere with the interview process.
(Joey walks in and sees Ross and Charlie kissing. He gives a faint, rueful smile, then he seems to recollect something and suddenly he moves back to Rachel's room. He knocks on her door and she opens)
Monica: My Sweet Sixteen! Remember, you went to third base with my cousin Charlie.
Ross: Yeah, right! What was last time he met a submission deadline for an abstract (he and Charlie laugh, then Joey starts laughing too without any reason) Well, why are you laughing?
Charlie: Oh my God, I completely forgot! (they laugh) Oh my God! I can't believe they let us back in this place! (they laugh more, and Ross start laughing too).
Ross: (recovers his composure and starts typing) Respectfully, professor R. Geller. (hits <return>, closes the laptop and joins Charlie on the sofa) Hey!
(In the rooms next door, Joey, Rachel, Ross and Charlie stop kissing and try to understand what the yelling was about. After a while they continue kissing. We're back in Chandler and Monica's room. Monica has some of her own hair stuffed in her mouth by Chandler.)
Rachel: Beefsteak Charlies?
Second message: "Hey Chandler, it's Charlie"
Chandler: (into receiver)Hello? Hey Charlie, what do you know?
Chandler: Yeah...I mean I want this so much! I mean, I wanna get one, I want my friend Charlie to get one...Except I don't care about Charlie.
Rachel: (worried) Be-cause Ross is the father of my child! You know... and I... want him to hook up with lots of women! (pause) I just... All I'm saying is... I don't think that Joey and Charlie have anything in common.
Monica: It's so weird, how did Joey end up kissing Charlie last night? I thought you'd end up kissing Charlie.
(Joey and Charlie enter. Ross looks at her)
Ross: Hey, I thought I'd end up kissing Charlie too ok? But SURPRISE!
Charlie: Oh, you know what? I'll come with you!
Charlie: The museum!
Charlie: No, no, no, not the Mets, the MET, singular!
Charlie: And first, I have to see the MET!
Charlie: Oh, you mean it? That would be so fun!
Joey: No, look, you know Charlie, right? She's cool, she's funny, her body is soo...
Charlie: I'm good!
Charlie: Hi!
(somebody knocks the door, Joey opens and it's Charlie)
Joey: I need to talk to you about Charlie.
Charlie: No, we went to the left.
Charlie: Hey!
Charlie: Yeah, let's go. (stands up and kisses Joey) (to Ross) Thanks Ross.
Charlie: Hi!
(Charlie walks in.)
Charlie: The museum was amazing!
Charlie: Well... I'm just thinking that maybe he's not the right guy to be with right now, maybe I should be with someone... I have more in common with. You know what I mean?
Charlie: Actually, you know, Joey is your friend, and you don't really know me that well; it would be weird.
Joey: (to Charlie) You're ready?
Charlie: Well, for one, he was talking about paintings that were nowhere around.
Charlie: Not so much, no. He had clearly memorized all the stuff to say, and some of it didn't even make any sense.
Charlie: I'm sorry, what?
Charlie: From... Cosmo??
Charlie: (while Joey's giving her a massage) Oh! That feels sooo good!
[Scene: Central Perk. Charlie, Joey and Rachel are on the couches]
Charlie: He is very sweet. Plus he's hot!
Charlie: Yeah, I guess that's true.
Joey: Maybe you could take Charlie shopping.
Charlie: I'm sure you have better things to do.
Charlie: If you have the time, I'd really appreciate the help.
Charlie: Oh, yeah! Let's do it!
Charlie: (to Joey) So, I have to go shopping today, which is my least favourite thing, I'm soo bad at picking out clothes!
Rachel: Hey Pheebs, I'm-I'm taking Charlie shopping, why don't you come and I'll help you find something.
Charlie: So you're up for keynote speaker! Who's making the decisions?
Charlie: He's a pretty tough guy to impress.
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey and Charlie on the couch. Rachel enters]
Joey: (to Charlie) Alright, have a good time. (they kiss)
(Phoebe moves in the dressing room from which Charlie went out)
Charlie: See, I told you I needed someone! Oh, you know, by the way, as a "thank you", I would really love to take you out.
Charlie: Yeah! Actually Joey and I are going to the movies tonight, wanna come?