words in movies
MONICA: Wow, for a guy who's recently lost his job, you're in an awfully good mood.
MONICA: It is nothing like the Hobbit. It's like reading about every relationship I've ever had, except for Richard.
JOEY: So, you're not mad at me for getting fired and everything?
ESTELLE: Look honey, people get fired left and right in this business. I already got you an audition for Another World.
PHOEBE: I don't think it would have sold a million copies but it would have made a nice gift for you.
EDDIE: Ohhhh. Relax, take it easy buddy. Tell me twice, you want me to go? Alright, alright, guess I'll be back for my stuff. [walks out the door and after a pause comes back in] But if you think for one second I'm leaving you alone with my fish, you're insane Jack!
CASTING GUY: Ok, listen, thanks for coming in.
JOEY: No no, uh, don't thank me for comin' in. Uh, at least let me finish. Uh, we could take the expressway but uh, this time of day you're better off taking the budge. You were goin' for the word bridge there weren't ya. I'll have a good day. [gets up and leaves]
RACHEL: Ok, ok, ok, moving on, moving on, next question. Ok number 29, have you ever betrayed another goddess for a lightning bearer? Ok, number 30.
ROSS: Yeah. And you should hold out for something bigger. I can't tell you how much respect I have for you not going to that stupid cab driver audition.
ROSS: Good for you.
ROSS: [approaching the mover holding the parrot] Hey hold on, hold on. How much for the uh, how much to save the bird?
ROSS: Go ahead, go ahead with the bird. Ok, do you have anything for around 200?
CHANDLER: Yeah, he's lived here for years, I don't, I don't know what you're talking about man.
JOEY: He paid a lot of money for it.
Chandler: No, no he went for a walk.
Tag: Thanks for having me over, you guys.
Chandler: Yeah. (Throws the pad on the table and heads for the bedroom)
Monica: Please, don't listen to Joey, okay. Would you look at him? He-hes obviously depressed. He's away from his family; he's spending Thanksgiving with strangers. What he needs right now is for you to be his friend.
Phoebe: Well, it's a problem for me, which means it's a problem for you 'cause I'm a cop. (Shows the badge.)
Monica: Making holiday candy for the neighbors.
Mr. Treeger:: You think you could make a mess and the big man in coveralls will come in here and clean it up, huh? Well, why dont think of someone else for a change?
Joey: No hey Rach, its cool okay? Yknow Im a loner too! (Heads for his room.) Right?
Mr. Geller: And if you see Rita Moreno, let her know Im looking for her.
Rachel: (worried) Okay please, youre kidding right?! I wrote that one as a joke for you!
Chandler: Oh, come on Monica, reliving past pain and getting depressed is what Thanksgiving is all about. Y'know, for me anyway. And of course, the Indians.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is getting ready for her first day.]
Ross: You're welcome for a delicious dinner.
Joey: We don't? We really should. From now on, 'Bert' will be our code word for danger.
Joey: (behind them) Oh!! Shrimp toast! (Walks right past the little group on his way for the shrimp toast.)
Joey: Waiting for candy.
Joey: (A guy walks by) Bijan for men? (Another guy walks by) Bijan for men? (Another guy walks by) Bijan for men? (An attractive woman walks by.) Hey Annabelle.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is getting ready for his date with Kristen.]
(Phoebe turns to Rachel and mimes remove a lid of a jar. Ross enters and Paul motions for Rachel to leave with him now.)
Bonnie: So, anyone up for a midnight dip in the ocean?
Monica: Im fine now, but it was really scary there for a while. I mean, someone slipped a-a threatening note under the door.
Chandler: Extremely allergic, okay? If I'm anywhere near a dog for more than 5 minutes, my throat will just close up!
Joey: A little uh, good deed for PBS and a little TV exposure, now that's the kind of math Joey likes to do!
Joey: Hey! Great, youre home! Guess what Phoebe got me for Christmas! (Starts drumming.)
Maitre d': Oh-kay, we'll have a table for you in about 45 minutes.
Ross: (Thinking it over) Sure! (Takes one) Hey, I just found out, I get Ben for the holidays this year.
Joey: Oh. Well good! (To himself) For me. (He picks up a jar of lotion.) What is this? Did you give yourself a facial?
Monica: Oops! (Covers its eyes.) Yknow, your birthday is in a month-and-a-half, what do you say I forget to get you a present for that too?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Ross are laying out the ground rules for the maid of honor auditions to Rachel and Phoebe.]
Rachel: So what should we do? Should we start looking for a new place?
Ross: Thanks. (Phoebe gets up to get a refill.) (To Monica) Oh! So for tomorrow, do you want to rent a car and drive down together or what?
Joey: Hey, you can cancel plans with friends if there is the possibility for sex!
Ross: Yeah, thats okay, I mean if you guys all have to go away for the first weekend Im alone by myself, y'know then I totally, totally understand.
Chandler: Well, thank you for lunch.
Chandler: So apparently we just dont pay for food anymore. (Rachel laughs then Chandler notices something.) Do you see what I see?
Joey: Okay, the next situation is for Rachel. The wedding is about to start you walk into the back room and you find Monica taking a nap with Ross. (Ross lies on the floor.) Ill be Monica. Go! (He jumps down and cuddles up with Ross.)
Monica: Phoebe, can I talk to you for a second?
The Waiter: (To Joey) And for you sir?
Phoebe: Look, why dont you just pay for it yourself?
Ross: Okay, okay, so we're in the car. Right? And bang! A shot was fired. And Joey with no regard for his own safety throws himself on me!
Rachel: Oh for God sake just pick a piece!
[Scene: Ross and Carol's, Ross and Carol are waiting anxiously for their new partner to arrive.]
Monica: Phoebe, hes gotta be in the room for that to work.
[Ross enters behind Rachel, and look at each other for a moment.]
Joey: Exactly! All right, everybody, listen up. The coffeehouse is going to be closed for about an hour.
Ross: Uh-huh. But it was a first for the rest of my building.
Ross: Oh see, I-I needed a new thing for today and there's this leather store that always smells so good and I thought to myself, "Wow, (To Chandler) I never really owned a good smelling pair of pants before."
Chandler: So what do you think? I want that guys genes for my kid! Those eyes, those cheeckbones!
Rachel: (looks around for the camera) Okay. Umm, well, first I would like to start by apologizing for kissing you and uh, for yelling at you.
Phoebe: Okay, whatever. Yknow what? I dont have time have time to convince you because hes only here for four hours, and Im gonna go see him! (Gets up and leaves.)
Mrs. Geller: Were sorry honey, but we just assumed if you got married after you turned 30 youd pay for it yourself.
Rachel: Can I see you in my office for a minute?
Joey: It was amazing! And not just for her... uh-uh. For me, too. It's like, all of a sudden, I'm blind. But all my other senses are heightened, y'know? It's like... I was able to appreciate it on another level.
Rachel: (pause as she realizes her lame attempt to shift the blame has failed) I am so hot for you right now.
Joey: (angrily) Yeah? Maybe we should talk about that for a little while!
Rachel: So that there will be a decent place for me to sit.
Joey: Where are you going? The vicar wont be home for hours.
Ross: They kept your room for a while.
(Rachel turns for the door and makes the "Wow!" face.)
Mr. Bowmont: What the hell, its for a good cause! All right!
Joey: Ah, Gunther, I cant pay for this right now because Im not working, so Ive had to cut down on some luxuries like uh, payin for stuff.
RACH: [obviously drunk] I mean, it's a cat, y'know, it's a cat. Why can't they get one of those bugs, y'know, one of those fruitflies, those things that live for like a day or something? [belligerently] What're they called, what're they called, what're they called?
Rachel: Ugh! Get out! Get out! Go! Come on! (Ross gets up and heads for the kitchen.) No! Not in there! Hes in there! (She points Ross to the door next to the kitchen.)
Joey: Hey, Gunther. Can you uh, can you cover for me? I just got an audition.
Phoebe-Estelle: It’s a little coincidental, but believable. (Joey nods in agreement). Listen, I’m sure you’re wondering why I didn’t get you an audition for that TV movie.
Mr. Geller: (To Monica) Why dont we take it for a spin?
Chandler: Okay look, don't...don't be mad okay? But after I unpacked the boxes I wanted to do something nice for you, so, I-I-I cleaned the apartment. So I moved everything around and then I forgot where it, where it went back and I'm sorry, I'm very sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
[Scene: The Hallway between the Apartments, Ross is hiding behind that bump out on Monicas side waiting for Phoebe and Rachel. As they come up the stairs, he jumps out and yells ]
Chandler: (frustrated) Okay, for the last time. Its not named for each individual man.
Ross: Hop in. (Phoebe hops in.) Get ready for the smoothest ride of your life.
Phoebe: Wow, that sounds great! And what are you making Monica, in case Rachels dessert is...[about to say bad] so good that I eat all of it. Theres none left for anybody else!
Joey: Yep. (Starts for Monicas room, but Chandler stops him.)
Rachel: Okay, but taking care of a drunk, naked woman seems like a job for Joey.
Phoebe: Oh let me guess, and you wanna have them all at the same time and you wanna have them for your brother.
Rachel: No, so I dont have to get married until Im 33! Thats three years, thats three whole yearsOh, wait a minute though. Ill need a year and a half to plan the wedding, and Id like to know the guy for a year, year and a half before we get engaged Which means I need to meet the guy by the time Im thirty.
Monica: I-I-I wanna thank you all for coming. My family and my friends
Ross: Hey! That was a practical purchase! I needed that car for transportation! Okay? I-I have a child!
Rachel: Oh, if I only want two kids, can I keep him for another year?
Ross: Yeah, I kind of uh, have something else planned for you guys.
CHAN: I'm telling you this thing won't print. Yes, I pressed that button like 100 times. You know, for a hot line you are not so hot. What? What is that in the background? Are you watching Star Trek?
Phoebe: Okay, a meat eater. Fine, thats one for you.
Rachel: Ohh, you can say. Come on, I dont want you to feel like you cant tell me things. (Motions for him to sit down.)
Joey: And Chandler I cant believe I let you pay for this one. (They hug and he whispers in his ear.) Thanks man.
Cecilia: No, he already knows that he owns everything in the room! Hes not finding it out for the first time! So, try it again.
Cecilia: But Well now, nows a different time for me. (Starts to cry.)
(Rachel excitedly jumps up and heads for the door.)
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Wow! How long were we arguing for?
Rachel: (grabbing a beer out of the chairs fridge) I am so psyched I kept this chair for myself!
Ross: Well, these. These are yours right here. (Pointing to the boxes they just created for her.)
Chandler: No, but Horny for Monica Minister called, wanting to know if we were still together.
Monica: Okay, while were waiting for these pills to kick in, Im gonna sit you down on the couch. Come on. (Phoebe gets up and goes with her.) Get some nice soft pillows under your head, Im gonna turn the TV on and you can watch whatever you want. And ImSit down(She sits down on the couch)gonna make you some tea. And then, Im gonna rub your feet.
Chandler: A freakish thin date with a hanger for her head?
Monica: Phoebe, relax none of that stuff ever happens! They just put it on there for legal reasons!
Joey: Anyway, I started working on what Im going to say for the ceremony, do you wanna hear it?
Ross: Hey! Oh listen, I was just clearing some space for your stuff.
Joey: Uh, really good. Really good. Yeah, I should be ready to kill myself any day now. (Chandler returns with a bobby pin and hands it to Joey.) Wow, you sure found that quick. (He tries the pin in the lock.) I justI wish I didnt feel this way about Rachel anymore, yknow? I wish things could go back to normal. I mean, I love living with her and God, helping out with the baby is just amazing, but now I think I think Ross feels left out. Yknow? When I had to take Rachel to the hospital, the doctor thought I was the father. God You shouldve seen the look on Rosss face. (Pause) By the way, I have no idea what Im doing here. For all I know Im just locking it more. Oh hey, did you try opening it with a credit card?
Monica: (entering) Hey guys! Do you wanna look at the song list for the wedding? (They ignore her.) Guys?
Monica: Im sorry. Im sorry. I-I should probably leave you girls alone. (She heads for the bedroom.)
Phoebe: Good for you!
Joey: No! Im up for a Soapie!