words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there, waiting to tell Frank and Alice the news.]
Frank: Yes.
Frank: I finally got my band!
Frank: Why would we be freaked?
Frank: (Theyre less than happy now) Oh.
Frank: Yeah, Ive been thinking ever since you said we were having triplets, the best thing for me to do is to drop out of college and get a job.
Alice: No, Frank.
Frank: Yeah, refrigerator college.
Frank: Yeah, yknow when we found out we were going to have a baby, yknow I figured yknow like I should yknow have like a careerand I love refrigerators!
Frank: No, its okay. Were-were gonna have three kids! And thats-thats a different kind of dream. Three kids and no money.
Monica: How did it go with Frank and Alice?
Phoebe: Well, Frank has to quit college because his super fertile sister is having three babies! I need to make a lot of money really fast, and I had an idea that I want to talk to you (Points to Chandler) about, cause you work for a big company. Okay, insider trading, what information is there that you can give me.
Rachel: Honey, youre not gonna make enough money to help Frank and Alice just by selling knives.
Phoebe: Ooh-Ooh! I did it! I did it! I figured out a way to make money! Im gonna open up my own massage place and Franks gonna help me! And! We can work it around his schedule so he doesnt have to quit school!
Phoebe: Okay. You know how people need transportation, but they also need massages to help them relax so I just figured we could combine the two, okay, I give the massages and Frank drives! I can fix up the van, bolt the table in the back, and you know what Ive got?
Phoebe: (entering) Everbody this is Frank! This is my half-brother Frank.
Phoebe: Sorry Frank, I'm kinda in the middle of the last favor you asked me to do.
Frank: Well, we got into a fight cause ah, she said I was to immature to get married.
Frank: So wait, whats the deal here, I can have sex with you, but I cant touch you?
FRANK: No but he didn't really talk about anything.
Phoebe: No, Im really okay with this. Yknow why? Cause look at them, and I made that, so I know its gonna be like a million times harder to give up a baby but, oh my God, its gonna feel like a million times better, right? I wanna do this. (To Frank and Alice) I wanna carry your baby.
[Scene: The Doctors office, Dr. Zane is examining Phoebe as Frank and Alice watch.]
Phoebe: I'm sorry, Frank. I didn't realise things were so bad. You know, I'll help out more. I can - I can babysit any time you want. You name the day, and I'll be there.
Frank: Well, okay, so whats nowgo get, go get the eggs, put em in there.
Frank: Hey, yknow I was thinking, what are the odds like if-if, if you stuff like 200 of them in there?
Frank: Well, you see, the-the thing is, we-we only got, we kinda have one shot to make it right.
Phoebe: No, I know, I know, that this is Franks life, (walks behind them, they turn around in the leather chairs to face her) y'know. Y'know, I dont want to be all judgmental, y'know, but this is sick, its sick and wrong!
Frank: Wait, y'know what, I-I came to you because I thought youd understand! Oh no!! Y'know, I would storm out of here right now if-if I had some money, or a place to go
Phoebe Sr: Uh-huh. Wow! Well, look! Theres Frank. (points to the picture.)
Frank: I know! Why dont you get drunk! That worked for a lot of girls in my high school.
Phoebe: Yeah. (phone rings and Phoebe answers it) Hello. (listens) Oh my God, I totally forgot! (listens) Well cant someone else do it. (listens) But, I have company. (listens) Yeah, no look, thats all right Ill come in. (hangs up phone) Um, Frank, Im really sorry but I have to go to work. Its-its one of my regulars and hes insisting that I do um.
Phoebe: Hello, tiny embryos. Well, Im-Im Phoebe Buffay, hi! Im-Im-Im hoping to be your uterus for the next nine months. You should know, that were doing this for Frank and Alice, who you know, youve been there! Umm, yknow they want you so much, so when you guys get in there, really grab on. Okay, and-and I promise that Ill keep you safe and warm until youre ready to have them take you home, so Oh! And also, umm next time you see me, Im screaming, dont worry, thats whats supposed to happen.
Frank: Oh, well just probably the worst one since Ive been alive.
Chandler: (reading the back of the picture) Me and Frank and Phoebe, Graduation 1965.
Phoebe Sr.: Noo! No! It wasnt like that I... Remember how I told you how Lily, Frank, and I we were, we were close. Well, we were, we were very close.
Frank: You hopped a little bit. Yeah, I really sorry.
Frank: Its so cool man, its so, its just cause being with her is so much better than like not being with her.
Frank: We were having lunch. Yeah and then all of the sudden we were like, "Hey! Y'know, were here, having lunch lets get married!
[Scene: The delivery room, later on, Rachel, Chandler, Monica, and Frank are there as Dr. Harad is checking out Phoebe.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Frank and Alice are there talking with Phoebe.]
Frank: Uhh, yeah.
Frank and Alice: (entering) Hi!
Frank: MY SISTERS GONNA HAVE MY BABY!!!!!!!
Frank: Oh come on we went, we went to Time Square, we found ninja stars, I almost got arm broken by a hooker...
Frank: See the thing is umm, were not able to yknow, uh, conceive.
Frank: Umm, its a lollipop and a uh, a home pregnancy test.
Frank: Oh I know!! (Both he and Alice squeal hysterically)
Phoebe: Guess what. Frank Jr., and Alice got married!
Frank: Okay. (They both squeal in expectation.)
Frank: Oh, well y'know, I wouldve called but I lost your phone number and then ah, my Mom locked me out of the house so I couldnt find it. And then, I tried to find a pay phone, and ah, the receiver was cut off. So...
[Scene: Phoebes, Frank is watching TV, and hes very depressed as Phoebe enters.]
Alice: Y'know it-its funny, um, Frank told me so much about you, but your not how I pictured you at all.
ROSS: Hey, Rach, you know what? I think, I think I know what'll make you feel better. How 'bout you make a list about me. RACHEL: Wha... forget it Ross, no, I am not gonna stand here and make a list of. . . ROSS: C'mon Rachel. RACHEL: OK, you're whiney, you are, you're obsessive, you are insecure, you're, you're gutless, you know, you don't ever, you don't just sort of seize the day, you know. You like me for what, a year, you didn't do anything about it. And, uh, oh, you wear too much of that gel in your hair. ROSS: See there, you uhh, alright, ya, you did what I said. RACHEL: Yeah, and you know what? You're right, I do feel better, thank you Ross. [she walks off and Ross puts his hand to his hair] [Scene: Back at Phoebe's. She is on the phone] PHOEBE: Yeah, um, in Albany, can I have the number of Frank Buffay. . . OK, um, in Ithica. . . alright, um, Saratoga. . . Oneonta. Alright, you know what, you shouldn't call youself information. [hangs up] [Phoebe's grandmother enters] GRANDMOTHER: Hey. PHOEBE: Hello grandma, if that is in fact your real name. GRANDMOTHER: C'mon now Phoe, don't still be mad at me. How's it going? PHOEBE: Well, not so good. Upstate's pretty big, he's pretty small, you do the math. GRANDMOTHER: Well, I think you're better off without him. Oh honey, I know he's your daddy but, but to me he's still the irresponsible creep who knocked up your mom and stole her Gremlin. PHOEBE: No I just, just wanted to know who he was, ya know. GRANDMOTHER: I know. OK, I wasn't completely honest with you when I told you that, uh, I didn't know exactly where he lived. PHOEBE: Whattaya mean? GRANDMOTHER: He lives at 74 Laurel Drive in Middletown. If you hit the Dairy Queen, you've gone too far. You can take my cab. PHOEBE: Wow. Thank you. GRANDMOTHER: Now, remember, nobody else drives that cab. PHOEBE: Uh-huh, got it. Ooh, I'm gonna see my dad. Wish me luck, Grandpa! [blows a kiss to a picture of Einstein]
Phoebe: Yayohyay! Okay, I gotta go tell Frank and Alice! Right now!
Frank: Yeah.
Alice: Phoebes right Frank. I know its hard to hear, but it wouldve been wrong to go through with it. I-I-I was being selfish, even though we, we want the same things now, in the future we may not. (to Phoebe) Is that it, is that what it is?
Frank: (To Phoebe) Hey! Am I late? Am I late? Nobody came out yet, right?
Frank: It's not that weird, is it?
(He runs out and Frank watches him go.)
Frank: (To Phoebe) What's with him?
Phoebe: Wow, a year and a half ago I didnt even know I had a brother, and now I have a sister too. (They all hug, and Frank and Alice start kissing.) Okay. Okay. Stop it, dont. So, I gotta get you a gift now. Is there anything you need?
[Scene: The delivery room, Rachel and Frank are there.]
Frank: Yeah, I love you. Okay, bye! (To Rachel) Hi!
Frank: Yeah.
(Everyone except Frank leaves.)
Rachel: Yeah. So Frank, three babies. Whew, that just seems like a lot, huh?
Frank: (laughs) Not to me.
(Phoebe screams in pain, and Frank screams with her.)
Frank: No-no ah, everything's okay. Everybody's healthy there's 30 fingers and 30 toes.
Frank: I can't believe there's somebody coming out of you right now. There's somebody coming out of you! Is it? Is it? It's my son.
Frank: Okay, okay, come on, you can do it. You can do it!
Frank: Hey, where's his thing?
[Scene: The waiting room, Frank is on the phone as Rachel approaches.]
[Scene: The delivery room, everyone is hanging out with Phoebe. Frank, Alice, and the kids aren't there.]
Frank: Frank Jr. Jr.!!
Frank: Yes, it has a head!
Frank: So gross! (He runs back to the delivery room.)
Frank: (entering) Hey!
Frank: Chandler's a girl!
Frank: Yeah.
[Scene: The delivery room, Chandler, Frank, and Ross are with Phoebe.]
[Cut to the waiting room, a twice triumphant Frank returns.]
Frank Sr.: It really says that?!
Frank: Ah, oh, the ah, vandalism.
Rachel: Yes! Yes! Yes, I do! I do know! Frank and Alice are gonna want to keep all of their children!
Frank Sr.: Thank you. All right.
Frank Sr.: Well, that's why you wanted me to come, right?
[Scene: Central Perk, Frank Sr. is just arriving.]
Frank Sr.: Oh. Huh. It's huh, well it's (opens it) oh it'sew used. Umm, cool.
Frank Sr.: Oh yes. Yes, yes, I am, uh-hmm.
[Cut to the waiting room, a triumphant Frank rushes in.]
Phoebe: But, I mean, do you think hes gonna enjoy it when hes up to his elbows in the diapers from all the babies they have to have right away?! This is not fair to Frank, (she walks behind them again, and hey again turn to follow her) and it-its not fair to the babies, and y'know what, its not good home economics.
Phoebe: You're Frank Buffay?
Frank Sr.: Shh! (Whispers) No! Joe Hill!
Frank Sr.: Yes, yes I was.
Frank Sr.: Well then I guess then I-I would I would have to say C.
Frank Sr.: So would it, would it make you feel better if I said I was very, very sorry that I left?
FRANK: Yeah. What? [a young guy comes around the corner]
Frank Sr.: Well no, just-just that one. But, it was stupid. Let's see, how did it, how did it go. Umm. (Singing.)
Frank Sr.: She what?!
Frank Sr.: Oh! What about, what about the girls?
Frank Sr.: Are you sure?
Frank: They musta read the sonogram wrong. 'Cause they, 'cause they thought it was a boy, but Chandler's a girl! Chandler's a girl!
Frank Sr.: All right. Well, y'know in my defense I was a lousy father.
Frank: Cause it just sorta happened, yknow we were at the courthouse, we were having lunch
Frank Sr.: So, what did Francis leave me?
Phoebe: Umm, okay, okay, look. I took this picture from your fridge. Okay, because I know that this is my Father. Yeah, this is Frank Buffay and you are standing right there next to him. Now, look I deserve to know where I came from. All right? So if you can help me find my Father then you should! Otherwise, youre just mean! (pause) So, just tell me the truth!
Rachel: No! Forget it! I am not gonna ask Frank to give you one of his kids!!
Alice: (laughs) No. No. No. (Sits down.) Okay, now, see, I wanna name the girl baby Leslie, and Frank wants to name one of the boy babies Frank JR. JR.
Frank Sr.: I just, I y'know, I'm not very good at this. So, umm (Backs away.)
Rachel: (entering) Hi. (To Phoebe) Hey, hi! So uh, Frank and Alice wanted me to tell you that they're still outside making phone calls.
Man: Umm, Frank Buffay.
Phoebe: Well, freaked. Cause it turns out that the odds are really sucky. And! This is Frank and Alices like only shot. Like, they are literally putting all of their eggs in my basket.
Frank: Uh, Delaware. She's on her way though, so until she gets here, I'm gonna be your coach. But don't worry, she told me all about the la-Mazada stuff.
Frank: Oh, excellent. (starts to melt the fire extinguishers hose.)