words in movies
(Ross with his pants around his ankles tries to run, but Dr. Geller forgets that he has his pants around his ankles and falls down trying to flee.)
(Dr. Geller, the man with the Ph.D. in Paleontology, is trying to find a place to hide, but this supposedly intelligent man in the hands of clich�d scriptwriters runs around with his pants down around his ankles like one of the Three Stooges.)
The Museum Official: (on phone) Hi, this is Heldi from the Morgan Chase museum. Im calling for Monica Geller. I want to let her know that there was a cancellation and if shes still interested in having the Bing-Geller wedding at our facility, it is available (Chandler runs to answer the phone.)
The Museum Official: (on machine) Hi, this is Heldi from the Morgan Chase museum. Im calling for Monica Geller.
Ross: I know! Anyway, they asked me to be a guest lecturer! I mean its temporary, but uh, if they like me it could lead to a full time job. How great would that look great on a mailbox, huh? "Professor Geller."
Mr. Geller: Ive been thinking about getting rid of it. I was driving it the other day and saw my reflection in a store window. Your mothers right, I do look like an ass.
Mrs. Geller: The sexy blonde behind the counter. (She waves at Gunther who waves back.)
Mrs. Geller: Oh no, dont be silly. I just bet Id need these. (Opens the freezer to reveal )
[Scene: The Gellers Garage, continued from earlier. Ross and Mr. Geller are still deciding what to do.]
Mr. Geller: Well you gotta get at it princess! When your mother and I were trying to conceive you, whenever she was ovulating, bam, we did it. Thats how I got my bad hip.
Mr. Geller: There was also leaves and guk and stuff.
Mr. Geller: I was just thinking. When my time comes-
Rachel: What?! I didn't have a good time in Greece! Ross abandoned me! Okay, I couldn't get a plane out, so I had to stay in their honeymoon suite with people coming up to me all the time going, "Oh, Mrs. Geller, why are you crying?" I mean, it was sooo humiliating. I felt like such an idiot! I mean, it's all my fault! And you know why, because I make very bad decisions.
Ross: Hey! I just got uh, my teacher evaluations! Check out what this one student wrote, "I loved Dr. Gellers class. Mind blowing lectures! Dr. Geller, you are definitely the hottie of the paleontology department!"
Mr. Geller: I didnt even have a chance to act as though Im okay with it!
Mrs. Geller: Honestly! Ross, this isnt just some girl you picked up in a bar and humped. A child should have a family.
MR. GELLER: I may not know any of your flash dances but I'm no slouch on the dance floor.
DR. BURKE: Ah, that's OK, come on in. Um, I'm sorry, is Monica Geller coming? I was told she was.
MR. GELLER: Look, I know what you're going through. When I turned 50 I got the Porsche. You... you got your own little speedster.
Monica: I really like to say that Im-um (Pause) Yknow what Id really like to say? Im drunk!! (Mrs. Geller pulls the camera down.) Thats right mom and dad your little Harmonica is hammered!! (Ross grabs the camera out of his dads hands.) And guess what! Ive been drunk before! And Ive smoked a cigarette! And I got a box of Ding-Dongs hidden in my underwear drawer! Its all okay. Its okay because I turned thirty today. And, and I can do anything I want! Because I am a grown up. (Falls over sideways with Ross filming the fall.)
Mrs. Geller: (To Monica) And you knew about this?!
MR. GELLER: Judy, Judy, relax, this is our little harmonica we're talking about. We taught her well. Ten percent of your paycheck, where does it go?
Mrs. Geller: Mmmm!
Mrs. Geller: They all had a thing for him.
Mrs. Geller: Well it was Chandler! We didnt think hed ever propose!
Carol: No, I mean it's not Geller.
Ross: Helen Geller? I don't think so.
Mr. Geller: Look, there are people like Ross who need to shoot for the stars, with his museum, and his papers getting published. Other people are satisfied with staying where they are- I'm telling you, these are the people who never get cancer.
Mrs. Geller: Well, they don't have to know that... (She starts to fluff the same pillow Monica fluffed multiple times earlier.)
Monica: All right, Rachel's party is in a couple of hours and there's a lot to do. Now, Ross, you got Geller blood, you're in charge of these yahoos!
Susan: Oh, no, nonononono, you see what he's doing? He knows no-one's gonna say all those names, so they'll wind up calling her Geller, then he gets his way!
Chandler: Oh well, not as lovely as you. I mean, I cant believe that you would have a thirty-year-old daughter! (To Mr. Geller) And you! I cant believe that you would have a tux thats thirty years old! (Puts his hand on Mr. Gellers shoulder.)
Ms. Geller: I understand, separation is hard. One time I was about to leave Ross to go to the beauty parlor and he got so upset, he took off all his clothes, tucked his ??? between his legs and cried out: �Mommy, I�m a girl, take me with you.�
[Scene: The Gellers Garage, Mr. Geller and Ross are finishing up recreating Monicas memories as Monica enters.]
Mrs. Geller: Nothing! It's an expression.
Mrs. Geller: Oh, maybe that's it.
Mrs. Geller: Me? I'm fine, fine. I'm glad you're here. ...What's with your hair?
Nurse: Mrs. Geller?
Mr. Geller: We're looking into it.
Mrs. Geller: What's different?
Mrs. Geller: What?
Mrs. Geller: What is going on?!
Mrs. Geller: You're right. We'll go with the burgundy.
Mr. Geller: Not just restaurants, from our house.
Mr. Geller: She may have died.
Mrs. Geller: Well, that doesn't mean she can't look nice!
Mrs. Geller: That's really a day shoe.
Mrs. Geller: Sweetie, you think you can get in there?
Mrs. Geller: (to Monica) Your grandmother would have hated this.
Mr. Geller: I'd like that.
Mrs. Geller: Mm. Unless we go with a different dress?
Mrs. Geller: Is everything all right, dear?
Mrs. Geller: More wine, dear?
Mr. Geller: Whaddya got there?
Mr. Geller: What's the score?
Mr. Geller: Beautiful! (Turns to watch with him)
Mrs. Geller: I'm not sure I know what you're getting at.
Mrs. Geller: Tell her what?
Mr. Geller: Yknow how the garage floods every Spring?
Mrs. Geller: We might still have some money, if your father didnt think it was a good idea to sell ice over the Internet.
Dr. Green: So? Come on! Explain yourself Geller! First you get my Rachel pregnant!
Mrs. Geller: I'm telling you, it's a wonder your mother turned out to be the positive, life-affirming person that she is.
Mrs. Geller: Actually they were Nana's.
Phoebe: Damn you Monica Geller hyphen Bing!
Monica: Because... I'm Monica Geller. It was my credit card you were using.
Monica: I'm Monica Geller. I've been taking care of you.
Mrs. Bing: Mr. Geller.
Mrs. Geller: It really was. Oh, c'mere, sweetheart. (Hugs her) Y'know, I think it might be time for you to start using night cream.
Mr. Geller: Eat your fish.
Mr. Geller: I wanna be buried at sea, it looks like fun.
Mr. Geller: No! Thank you! (Hugs Chandler) Monica, and Ross! I dont know what Im gonna do about the two of you!
Mr. Geller: Well Im peeking. (He peeks.) Oh my God!
Mrs. Geller: Well, at least she had the chance to leave a man at the altar...
Mr. Geller: I'm not freaking out, I'm just saying, if somebody had come to me with the idea andndash;
[Scene: Nana's house, Ross, Mrs. Geller and Aunt Lillian are going through clothes.]
Mr. Geller: I think I accidentally used Monicas boxes to keep the water away from the Porsche.
Mr. Geller: I'm not gonna tell you what they spent on that wedding... but forty thousand dollars is a lot of money!
Mrs. Geller: Oh thats all right, Im coming back later with your father.
Carol: Hello? It's not gonna be Helen Geller.
Rachel: And I will make everyone call me Mrs. Geller!
[Scene: A hallway, Joey and Ross find Mr. Geller with his ear up against a janitors closet door.]
Older Scientist: Dr. Geller, theres a seat over here. (Motions to an empty chair at the white table.)
Mr. Geller: Honey, relationships are hard. Like with your Mom and me. You know after we graduated college we broke up for a while. It seems her Father, your Grandfather, wanted her to travel around Europe, like he did. Of course, he got to do it on Uncle Sam's nickel, because he was also strafing German troop trains at the time. However, (turns around and sees that Monica is sleeping and puts a blanket around her, kisses her, picks up the cigar, and starts watching the video)
Phoebe: Rach, Rach, I just remembered. I had a dream about Mr. Geller last night.
Mr. Geller: Well, the garage flooded sweetie and it ruined everything in your boxes. Im sorry.
STEVE: Excuse me, you're Monica Geller aren't you?
Mr. Geller: Listen to me! When my time comes, I wanna be buried at sea.
Monica: Hi. (On the phone) Hi, uh, yes, this is Monica Geller. Um, I believe I'm taking some classes with you and I was wondering what they were.
Ross: Hi, um, Im err, (has to clear his throat) Im Ross Geller, and err ah... (pats Carols bulge) ..thats, thats my boy in there, and uh, (points) this is Carol Willick, and this... is Susan Bunch. Susan is um Carols, just, com... (embarrassment finally overwhelms the poor fellow, who becomes incoherent until) ..whos next?
Mr. Geller: (Forcefully.) Hey, you keep pushing me on this, my foots going to meet the middle of your ass.
Mrs. Geller: Oh, Martha Ludwin's daughter is gonna call you. (Tastes a snack) Mmm! What's that curry taste?
Mr. Geller: Well I dont know, I-I suppose we may have favored you unconsciously, you were a medical marvel! The doctor said your mother could
Rachel: I dunno. Yknow to me hell always be Jack Geller, walks in while youre changing.
FBOB: Geller!
Mrs. Geller: What that Rachel did to her life.... We ran into her parents at the club, they were not playing very well.
MR. GELLER: Hi.
MR. GELLER: Some of your old stuff.
MRS. GELLER: Why?
MRS. GELLER: Oh, Jack look, there's that house paint commercial that cracks you up. [the Gellers return to watching TV and Ross goes over to Monica]
MRS. GELLER: Hi darling.
MRS. GELLER: Well sweetie, we have a surprise for you. We're turning your room into a gym.
MRS. GELLER: Oh, hi Rachel.
ROSS: I'm Ross Geller. Wha, I'm, God in your add you said you were pretty but wow.
MR. GELLER: It is off.