words in movies
Ross: Hey, do you guys think that if all those things happened, wed still hang out?
{Transcribers note: This is where the opening credits are, but theyre not the usual opening credits. Oh no! These credits are based on the world that would have been created had all of the above actually happened. It starts out with all of them at the fountain sitting on the couch as Fat Monica runs up and sits on the arm of the couch, tilting the whole thing towards her. It then goes on to show Rachels still a shop-aholic and with Barry. Fat Monica is sweating while cooking and dancing while eating a donut. Phoebe as the Wall Street shark smoking while on two cell phones. Then theyre dancing in the fountain. Joey entering as Dr. Drake Remoray and meeting a groupie. Chandler trying to write as a bird does its business on his shoulder and falling asleep while typing. Ross doing some kara-tay and trying to get Carol into bed. And finally, some more dancing in the fountain, them all flexing, and the turning out the lamp and shutting off all the lights bit from the first season. Just remember one thing, this is an alternate universe. Everything from every other episode doesnt apply, for instance, Ross and Rachel have no history. And in fact have not seen each other in years in this world.}
Phoebe: Yeah! Or too, you could be two stockbrokers and youre-youre-youre rolling around naked on the trading floor and everybodys watching! (Ross looks at her.) It never happened.
Rachel: No seriously! Seriously! What has happened to the sanctity of marriage?
Charity guy: Wow! Are you here to make another donation the same day? I don’t think that that’s ever happened before.
Chandler: Yknow what? It seems like all of the sudden; so much has happened.
Phoebe: So, I need to write some depressing stuff to go along with my new floozy voice, but nothing that sad has ever really happened to me.
Phoebe: Hi, so what happened?
Monica: What happened?
Chandler: It happened in London.
Chandler: Kind of? If you just kept this to yourself none of this would've happened.
Joey: What happened? What happened?
All: Why, what happened?
Parker: What a beautiful place. What a great night! I have to tell you, being here with all of you in Event Room C I feel so lucky. I think of all the good times that have happened here. The birthdays, the proms, the mitzvahs both bar and bat, but none of them will compare with tonight! My God, I dont want to forget this moment! Its like I want to take a mental picture of you all! Click! (He takes a mental picture of them all.)
Joey: Oh, y'know the same thing happened to me one time.
Rachel: See? Yeah, you told me the story. He and Monica dated when they broke up they couldn't even be in the same room together and you all promised that you would stay his friend and what happened? He got phased out!
Phoebe: Okay, then what happened?
Rachel: Okay, but if it only happened that one time, how come we found your underwear in our apartment the other day?
Ross: I was really upset about Rachel and Paolo, and I think I had too much tequila, and Nora- um, Mrs. Mom- your Bing- was just being nice, y'know, and- But nothing happened, nothing- Ask Joey, Joey, uh, came in-
Monica: (to the guys) Not the way they're doing it. What, what happened? How did she die?
Rachel: Except it didn't. It happened to me. Oh, god, I'm gonna look like a big marshmallow peep. What am I doing? What am I doing? My father's right. I can't live on my own! I can't even do laundry!
Chandler: It did enter my mind! But then something happened that made it, shoot right out.
Ross: What happened?
Rachel: Be-because I didn't want him to think I was stupid! I mean, that was really embarrassing what happened to you!
Phoebe: Yeah, I think I told it wrong. Y'know, we should talk about that because I don't totally understand what happened there.
Joey: What happened?
Monica: What happened?
Chandler: The weirdest thing happened at the coffee house, I think, I think Phoebe was hitting on me.
Chandler: So what happened?
Mrs. Geller: (incredulous) You dont know how that happened?! Your dog thought my diaphragm was a chew toy!
Monica: Come on Rach, when a guy says hes going to call, it doesnt mean hes going to call. Hasnt it ever happened to you?
Phoebe: What happened to the intimate dinner party?
Rachel: What?! What? What happened?!
Ross: Can we, can we just forget this ever happened?
Monica: So you're moving in with him. What happened?
[cut to Monica telling the gang about what happened at Petes]
Frank: Cause it just sorta happened, yknow we were at the courthouse, we were having lunch
Rachel: Its good. Except he makes us watch the Discovery Channel all day long. Did you know that something really boring happened to someone really ugly in the Middle Ages? (to the waitress handing her a cup of coffee) Oh, thank you. Ill see you guys later.
Chandler: Why?! What happened?!
Joey: Well! What happened?! Did we miss it?
Monica: No that is not what happened with us. Well, I was umm, I was really sad that night because this guy that I was Rosss mom.
Chandler: Isnt that what happened with you and the brides maid?
Phoebe: Oh my God. What happened?
Monica: Phoebe, what, what happened here?!
Monica: (entering) Okay, I talked to the guy with the shovel and I found out what happened.
Monica: (answers the phone) Hello? (Listens.) (To Phoebe) It's Joey. (Phoebe's proud of herself.) (To Joey) I'm so glad you called! Chandler told me what happened. Y'know he's really upset about it.
Rachel: Yeah, remember that thing I told you that happened yesterday? Well it didnt happen.
Monica: What happened to your teeth.
Rachel: Yeah but, you dont, you dont, you dont want to try to much too fast. Yknow? I mean, you do remember what happened to the little girl that tried to much too fast dont you?
Mr. Geller: What happened son?
Chandler: So you kissed her, so what happened after that?
Monica: What happened to Janine?
Monica: I know...God. I haven't seen my savings take a hit like this since I was a kid and they came up with double-stuffed Oreos. What happened to all our money?
David: Uh, that's definitely a, uh, valid question. And, uh, the answer would be (Writes YES on the board) yes. Yes I was. But, see, I wanted it to be this phenomenal kiss that happened at this phenomenal moment, because, well, 'cause it's you.
Ross: Of course, what happened? (Lets her in.)
Rachel: Oh, slides. (Laughs.) So really nothing happened.
Monica: What? We took a walk, nothing happened. I can back with nothing all over me.
Monica: What happened to your rule about never sleeping with sick people?
Jill: Youll never believe what just happened, Ross just totally blew me off and he didnt even tell me why!
Joey: Chandler, come on nothing even happened!
Janice: Oh, Im sorry honey, Im so, so, (nasally) haaaaa! Im so, so sorry, I just (nasally) haaaaaa! But I, oh what happened was, I-I-I cant breathe. Can you get me a bag, or something?
Rachel: Oh! I knew it! What happened?
Rachel: You are not going to believe it! Joshua came into work today, and guess what happened?
Ross: I was having a little chat with ah, Bonnie, and ah, guess what, she-she happened to bring up y'know, who was behind the um, whole head shaving idea, and now, who was it? Oh, thats right, thats right, it was you!
Ross: No. No. Nothing happened. I shut the drapes to uh, show her slides of my favorite fossils.
Chandler: (lets him out) What happened?!!
Monica: Well, what happened?
Chandler: What the hell happened?!! How were you locked in?!! And where the hell is all of our stuff?!!
Russell: Ross, I have been a divorce attorney for 23 years and never had I so much business from one client. Why dont you tell me what happened.
Rachel: No, no dont get mad because lookthis is what happened. So I-I started packing, then I realized, "What am I doing? I am lousy at packing!" Right? But you love packing! So, as a gift to you, on our last night, ta-da!
Pete: Let me tell you a story. When I set out to create Moss 865, do you think it just happened overnight? No. There was Moss 1, that burnt down my Dads garage, there was Moss 2 that would only schedule appointments in January, and 862 others that I learned from, just like I learned from this fight, never to let a guy stand on my neck.
Joey: Hey, hey, hey, you're lucky I caught them when I did, or else who knows what woulda happened.
Ross: Oh my God, you guys!! (Hes excited about what he thought happened.)
Paul: Nope! That never happened to me!
Chandler: Nothing happened? Nothing? So you didnt tell my girlfriend that you love her?
Ross: What happened you guys?
Phoebe: What happened?
Richard: Well all right, one thing happened?
Richard: Oh, hey look nothing happened.
Monica: (running up to Ross) What happened in Atlantic City?!
Chandler: Its happened to you?
Rachel: Well what happened at dinner?
Rachel: Well wait a minute, what happened to Days of Our Lives?
Phoebe: What happened?
Rachel: Well, do you want to hear what actually happened or Joeys lewd version?
MRS BUFFAY: Schnoodle. Oh my God, what the hell happened to my dog?
Ross: What happened?!!
Rachel: But you said that you liked him! I mean what happened?! Did ya just change your mind?!
Rachel: Jill, honey, I think this is the best thing that couldve ever happened to you. I mean you needed to get out on your own anyway! And you know when I did it, I-I-I at first I was scared, and look at me now! Im the only daughter dad is proud of! Okay, well this is, this is what youre gonna do. Youre gonna get a job, youre gonna get an apartment, and then Ill help you and you can stay with us. Right Pheebs, she can stay with us?
Chandler: (with his mouth full) What happened? Im just eating candy.
Monica: What happened to Santa, Holiday Armadillo?
Monica: Really? Okay, so why dont you tell me what happened to Ross Junior year at Disneyland?
Ross: No-no its not. What-what happened there Ned?
Chandler: Do you know what just happened?
Ross: Look, I didnt want to rush into anything. And it seemed like she didnt want to either. But I dont, I dont understand how any of this happened! What? Did she find the ring in my jacket, assume that I was going to propose, throw it on, and-and just start telling people?
Joey: Hey Mon, you might wanna make some more lasagna too, because something mightve happened to a huge chunk of it.
Phoebe: What? What happened to the window in the attic?!
Rachel: Im not saying that Im a lesbian! Im just saying that this happened!
Joey: Hey. (Laughs then seriously) It happened!
Phoebe: (laughs) Yeah, Im sure that happened.
Ross: Something couldve happened. All right? She-she really dug my slides. And-and she was definitely giving me the vibe.
Monica: Oh wow! Okay. Dont scare me like that okay? I mean for a minute there I was like, "Oh my God! The worst has happened!"
Phoebe: I cant believe I still dont know what happened to the window in the attic!
Melissa: I dont know. I dont remember a lot of things that never happened.