words in movies
(Ross spots Chandler and starts chasing him around the kitchen table. Chandler runs and hides behind Monica.)
Monica: I'm so sorry that you had to find out this way. I'm sorry, but it's true, I love him too.
Joey: Okay, all right, whew! What do you say we all clear out of here and let these two lovebirds get back down to business? (Ross turns and glares at him.) Hey-hey-hey, I-I-I'm just talking here, he-he's the one doing your sister.
Katie: Ohh, I love Chinese! How did you know I love Chinese?! (She hits him repeatedly as she says that.)
Chandler: Hey listen, come on, Joey is having a problem! A little girl is beating him up.
Katie: No, you make them funny. You're the funny one! (She punches him again and he retreats to the arm of the couch.)
Katie: Aww, like I could hurt you. Are you making fun of my size? Don't make fun of me because of my size! (She punches him again and almost knocks him off the arm of the couch.)
Phoebe: (ignoring him and continuing her conversation) That's what I'm saying. (Laughs.)
Phoebe: Ooh. (Turns to him.)
Phoebe: All right, everyone calm down! Everyone calm down! I have something that I would like to say! Who here likes Ross? (Ross is the only one who raises his hand and Phoebe glares at him to put his hand back down.) Of course you don't like him! He-he didn't give you any money, he raised his own hand when I asked, "Who hear likes Ross," and he's wearing two nametags! (He takes one off.) I-I'll be honest with you guys, when I first met Ross I didn't like him at all! But then once I got to know him I saw that he's really sweet and caring and very generous. I mean, all I'm saying is don't judge Ross before you get to know him all right? I mean, I like all you guys now, but when I first meet you y'know Kurt, I thought, y'know abrasive drunk, umm Lola, mind numbingly stupid! And okay, you guys (She turns to an elderly gentleman and a 20 something woman, who're a couple.) (To the girl) Gold-digger, (To the old guy) cradle robbing perv! So, I think you all know what I mean.
Monica: (kneels with him) Chandler, umm, I want you to take just a minute and I want you to think about how ridiculous this sounds.
Ross: This is fun. Hey Rach, remember that whole "We were on a break thing?" Well, I'm sorry, will you marry me? (Laughs--whines as he sees that no one is laughing. They're just staring at him in shock.)
Rachel: Anastassakis/Papasifakis wedding, excellent! {Its a good thing Jennifer Aniston is Greek, because she had to pronounce those names. Luckily for me, they were written on a sign.}(The happy couple emerges.) Congratulations. (To the best man and maid of honor) Mazel Tov! (The rabbi emerges.) Hi! Oh, great hat. (Hes wearing an interesting hat and she takes him over to talk.) Listen umm, I need you to perform another wedding. Can you do that?
Rachel: (still not quite able to look at him) Hi! I love you on that show! I watch you everyday! I mean, when you took out your own kidney to save your ex-wife even though she tired to kill you
Phoebe: No, I know! I-Im sorry, but the moment I touch him, I just wanna throw out my old oath and take a new, dirty one.
Monica: Wait a minute, just because he paid for your head shots youre gonna take him? Joey, I dont think youre comprehending just how slutty this dress is!
Monica: Okay, the owner of Allesandros came over to yell at me, but instead I made him some sauce, and he offered me the job as head chef!!
Ross: (waking up) What? (notices that there is now a beautiful woman sitting next to him)
Rachel: No you guys, I am not getting in a car with him, youll have to think of something else.
Mr. Geller: And you tell him no one takes advantage of the Gellers.
Eric: Well, I guess Ill see you at the wedding. (Exits and Phoebe follows him into the hall.)
Rachel: Okay. (He starts to leave, and Rachel grabs him and gives him a passionate kiss.) I'll miss you.
Ross: Thats right! Made expressly for Val Kilmer and worn by him in the hit film that Batman film he was in.
Rachel: Yeah, yeah, you go talk to your friend. You tell him, "Nice try."
Phoebe: (singing) "Went to the store, sat on Santa's lap. Asked him to bring my friends all kind of crap. Said all you need is to write them a song. They haven't heard it, so don't try and sing along. No, don't sing along.
Kathy: Clearly, Im having sex with him?
Phoebe: Why dont you ask him out?
Ross: We are having a baby together, but were not involved. (The cashier, a very beautiful woman, looks confused) I mean, uh we-we were seeing each other a while ago, but then we were just friends. And then there was one drunken night. (Rachel looks at him angrily) Or, yes stranger, wed like this delivered please.
Chandler: Well, she wasnt sleeping with him.
Mr. Waltham: Will you call him?
(They all turn and glare at him.)
Rachel: Heywhoa, slow down. (Gets a whiff of him) No, keep moving. (Joey runs off.) Wow!
(The duck starts to frantically flap his wings, while Joey is holding him, in an attempt to get away.)
Chandler: Ooh, let me talk to him!
Chandler: Maybe, she doesnt hit him all the time.
Phoebe: Im sorry. (Goes and hugs him)
Chandler: Nothin! This is the nine millionth ring store weve been too and I cant find the perfect ring! (Goes over to another display counter and starts pointing at rings.) Ugly ring! Ugly ring! Ugly ring! (Notices that one of the jewelers is watching him.) Its a beautiful selection. (The jeweler walks away slowly.)
Mrs. Geller: (stopping him) Dont get up Jack! The safety pins are about to blow.
Monica: Cause I ran into him at the bank, he is still soo cute.
Rachel: How are you? (She goes to kiss him on the cheek, but stops because of the dates and pats him on the shoulder.)
Joey: Well, why do you call him Gandolf?
Chandler: All right fine, don't do anything, just sit here and talk to us, meanwhile she is talking to him about you. And he's being Mr. Joe Sensitive, and she starts thinking 'Maybe this is the guy for me, because he understands me.'
Monica: All right shut up for a second and let me just see something. (She kisses him back on the lips) Oh, wow! (They then hug and kiss, very passionately.)
Chandler: We cant tell him, you cant go up to a guy you barely know and talk about his.... stuff.
Chandler: Let me tell you why you need to pick me. (Goes to sit on the couch facing backwards to the kitchen. Rachel gets a chair and sits opposite him) See, when I was a kid, I was always left out of everything, you know, and it really made me feel... insecure. You know, I was always picked last in gym. Even behind that big fat exchange student who didn't even know the rules to baseball. I mean, this guy would strike out and then run to third. Anyway, If I'm the only one left out of this wedding, I just know that all those feelings are gonna come rushing back.
Joey: (entering) Hey. (Ross turns to see who it is, and seeing its Joey he just ignores him and turns back around.) Ross, I know youre pissed at me, but we have to talk about this.
Emily: I dont care! You just get him!
ROSS: Alright, alright, here's the chance. Monica give him cash, Rachel give him your earrings. Something, now, anything. MONICA: No, I will not cave. RACHEL: Yeah, I'm with Mon. ROSS: Alright, alright, you know how you say I never seize the day? Well, alright, even though he's your super, I'm seizing. [approaches Mr. Treeger] Mr. Treeger, here is 50 bucks, merry Christmas. [Gives him the cash.]
[Cut to Marcel walking along a hallway. He notices a banana on the floor and picks it up. The hand of an unseen person grabs him and carries him away. Then cut to Ross and Rachel on the street outside.]
Rachel: OK, alright, OK, um... then could you please, uh... just give him a message for me? Please? This is very important.
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachels new job, she is waiting for Joshua and practising how to ask him out.]
Phoebe: Forget her! You enjoy this!! (Pulls him back up and starts applauding again. Joey waves and does a salute.]
Monica: He didnt ask me to marry him.
Phoebe: Oh my God, thats so freaky! Turn him off!!
[Scene: Elizabeths Dorm Room, Ross is walking up to her door and knocks on it. Suddenly the door opens and Elizabeth drags him into the room.]
Joey: Okay, time to take off the bra. (She glares at him.)
Rachel: Ummm. Oh! Im sorry. (She grabs the box and offers him a piece.) Its a little old but
Joey: Oh! I know how you can get him, take off your bra.
Monica: Or if you want to kiss him, umm, you could use mistletoe.
Emily: I was going to call him, but
Emily: Id really rather talk to him.
(Phoebe grabs Gunther and kisses him. He then falls to the couch in shock.)
Ross: Look, I-I know how miserable you are, I wish there was something I can do. I mean I wish I were a seahorse. (She glares at him) Because with seahorses its the male, they carry the babies. And then also umm, Id be far away in the sea. (He sits back down.)
Rachel: What am I making him by the way?
Chandler: Look (hands him a drink) it was a lo-o-ong time ago.
Chandler: Well, Chandler will be there for you too. I mean, well, he might be a little late, but-but, hell be there. And hell bring you some cold soda, if want you need him for is that youre really hot.
Ross: Its worth the pain. (She goes to hug him again.) Yknow what, you know what? Its not.
ROSS: Well, this was fun. Uh, we should really do it again sometime, wha'dya say? Ok. Alright so I've got him.
Monica: (interrupting him) No-no-no, dont-dont do the accent. Youve got to see her again.
(Joey joins him.)
Rachel: Oh, well maybe there was a dog lookin at him.
Phoebe: (walks him to the kitchen) Easy. Step. How did it get on?
Chandler: Gunther, can I get another cup of coffee, please? (Gunther starts to pour him another cup.) So uh, what do you do when youre not working here?
Chandler: Because that's who I am, okay? I'm sure a mature man like Richard could see a tape like that and it wouldn't bother him. Just'd be another saucy anecdote for him to share at his men's club over brandy and moustaches.
[Chandler tries to warn Phoebe that the woman is coming on to her, but Phoebe doesn't see him.]
Rachel: (stopping him) Oh no-no, no-no, they dont want you to put your hands in the pockets until you are out of the store.
Female Clerk: Yknow, there are two people who could put your picture up there. (She makes eyes at him.)
Ross: Thats a good point. So uh, how long are you gonna punish him?
Rachel: Ohh, nothing, I just wanted to see you. See you and hug you. (Hugs him) See you.
(Chandler wakes him up, again.)
Phoebe: Oh, okay. (Walks over to him.) Excuse me sir? Could you come with me please? You have a phone call.
Joey: More embarrassing than shiny raspberry lip balm?! (Rachel just looks at him.) I didnt say raspberry before did I? All right just-just tell me Rach, just tell me!
Chandler: (writes what Joey said and waits for him to go on) Yeah?
Ross: What am I supposed to do? He's out cold! In fact he was just talking in his sleep before and evidently he wants someone named Fran to spank him harder.
Ross: Oh! (She kisses him) Ah. (They kiss more, and move down onto the couch. Ross's hand moves under some garbage) Aw! (His hand is covered with something brown and gooey.)
(Joey holds his fist up, and Chandler gives him two thumbs up.)
Ross: (yelling, thinking Emily can hear him through the answering machine all the way to New York.) I love you too! Im, Im gonna call you right now from the phone booth! (Realises) You cant hear me. (Goes to make his call.)
Rachel: Monica! I couldnt find him for two hours! He was having sex with Amy Welch!
Rachel: Yeah. Just, if its possible, could you leave him somewhere and go have sex with another guy?
Monica: Anyway um, when he left he forgot to take the poem with him. Now, I am like totally dense about poetry, but I think it's pretty good all right. Check it out. (hands them the poem)
Chandler: Kathy! Kathy! Hi!! Kathy! Kathy! (She doesn't hear him and keeps running, Chandler starts chasing her as the theme to The Mod Squad starts to play. First, a car almost hits him and then gets mustard splashed on him as he runs by a hot dog vendor.) Kathy! (He keeps running and gets tangled up in the leashes of five dogs, in desperation he throws his paper.) Fetch! Fetch it! (He frees himself and resumes the chase) Kathy! Kathy! Kathy! (He now trips and falls into a pile of garbage, he tries to get up and scream her name again but he has a piece of spinach in his mouth. He gets out of the garbage and starts crossing the street by running over the hoods of a couple of cabs.) Kathy! (He jumps in front of her and out of breath he says) Kathy.
[Scene: Joeys bedroom, hes snoring again and Chandler is there to roll him over.]
(Rachel picks up a newspaper and starts beating him with it.)
Ross: Joey, I figured youd understand. I mean, I-Ive known him a lot longer.
Ross: Yknow what? I think I can take care of myself, Ill talk to you later. Good-bye. (Hangs up the phone and turns to find Jill sitting really close to him.) Whoa! Uh, that was your sister actually. She-she thinks that youre just using me.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey is getting ready for a fishing trip and Phoebe is asking him about the fishing lures. Ross is playing with the rod, and Monica is pretty much just watching the on goings.]
Joey: Oh-oh! (Shows him whats on the back, "Best Man Joey Tribbiani, with a huge picture of him.)
PHOEBE: I, I don't know what to say. I mean, you know, you're married to someone for six years and you think you know him and then one day says, 'Oh, I'm not gay.'
Joey: If anything should happen to him
Emily: Youre welcome. (She hugs him tightly and he winces.) Im sorry. Did I hurt you?
Phoebe: Wow! This reminds me of the time when I was umm, living on the street and this guy offered to buy me food if I slept with him.
Joey: (hangs up the phone) Wow! Well, my folks really liked it! So what-what did you guys think? (Phoebe smiles, walks up to him, and presses her breasts against him.) It wasnt that good.
Chandler: Marry me. (Both Ross and Chandler hit him.)
Joey: Im so worried about him, yknow?
(Ross keeps staring at her, head on table. Chandler smacks him with a newspaper. Joey enters, Ross and Chandler laugh at him.)
Tag: I feel great. (Rachel laughs) In fact! (Walks over to her desk, sweeps its contents onto the floor and Rachel just glares at him.) What?
Fat Monica: Yeah, yeah, and you were going him y'know, your flower.
Phoebe: Thank you. (She pats him on his head.)
Chandler: They couldnt be worse. I spent eight hours calling him last night, just trying to get him to talk to me.
Ross: Oh, whatever. (Laughs and gives Joey the thumbs up heading back to his apartment. Joey follows him)
Phoebe: Oh, it's so pretty. This must have cost him a fortune.
Emily: Oh. (Shes shocked and hugs him.) Thank you. (She boards the plane.)