words in movies
Joey: (going over and picking up the rod) Thats all right. Hey you guys, you know whats going to be great about the fishing trip this year? When my dad gets me out in the middle of the lake and gives me that, "Joey, what are you doing with your life?" stuff. I can say, "Well, Im doing a movie with Charlton Heston dad. What are you doing with your life?"
Chandler: You dont have to stop having fun just because Im here. Kathy didnt cheat on all of you. (To Joey) Well, except you. (They hug and Chandler goes into the bathroom with the chick and duck following him.)
Monica: Hey, Joey, I dont think that you should leave Chandler alone. I mean its only been two days since he broke up with Kathy. Maybe you can go fishing next week?
Joey: Look, theres nothing I can do for him right now, hes still in his sweat pants, thats still Phase One. Y'know? Ill be back for Phase Two, I would never miss Phase Two.
Joshua: (turning around) Oh! You know what I need?
Mr. Waltham: (entering) Rachel! Could I have a moment?
Mr. Waltham: I-I was wondering, my niece you see is in from Londonwell Shropshire really but yknowwell shes about your age I say. Anyway I have tickets for the opera, Die Fledermaus, and I was wondering if youd like to keep her company this evening?
Rachel: Me, Fledermaus, great. I really(motions to Joshua.)
Rachel: Ohh! Right! Right, sorry, Ill be right back!
Joshua: Uhh, actually yknow what, I kindaI have to take off.
Joshua: But, I was curious; do you have any plans for tonight?
Joshua: I invested in this night-club and its opening tonight, would you like to come?
Rachel: (shocked) Well, I-I guessI
Joshua: Kidding! (Rachel is relived) Im gonna get there early, but Im going to put you on the V.I.P list, okay? Look for me.
Mr. Waltham: (entering) I almost forget the tickets, didnt I?
Mr. Waltham: I think youll like it, it has two out of the three tenors.
Chandler: Yknow, I cant believe Kathy did this too me. I really, thought that she was the one. I tell you what, from now on Im never getting out of this chair, ever! Okay? From now on, this chair is the one! You wanna what else is the one? My sweat pants!
Joey: Yeah, three days on the lake without a shower. Plus! I fell in that big tub of worms at the bait stand! Hey, how-hows he doing?
Joey: (To the rest of the gang) Hey, see that? He just needed his pal to come home. All right, uh, Ive got to go memorise my lines. (Starts to go his bedroom) Me and Charlton Heston bright and early tomorrow morning! Yeah-yeah!
Rachel: Ohh, its Joshua invited me to this fancy club opening tonight. But, I already told Mr. Waltham that I would take his niece to this dumb old opera. So What are you gonna do?
Monica: I dont know sweetie.
Monica: I cant! I have to work!
Phoebe: I would, but I get my morning sickness in the evening.
Rachel: Ohh, gosh. You guys, come on, this isI have to meet Joshua! This is my one chance for him to see the fun Rachel. Yknow the "Wouldnt it be great if she was my wife" Rachel. Ohh, all right! Are Joey and Chandler back?
Monica: I think shes here.
Ross: You want me to take some girl Ive never met to the opera so you can go to a club and flirt with some guy, hmm, that-that is a toughie.
Rachel: Ill be right there! (to Ross) Okay, Ross, please come on! I thought we have moved on! I thought weve gotten to a place where we could be happy for each other! I mean was that just me?
Ross: All right, Ill do it.
Rachel: Im Rachel Green.
Rachel: Theres been a teeny-teeny change in plans. It turns out that Im not free tonight. So
Emily: Really?! Well, thats just lovely, isnt it? I mustve missed your call, even though I didnt leave the flat all day.
Rachel: Oh well, no I
Emily: Oh, no-no-no, thats not rude! Its perfectly in keeping with a trip that Ive already been run down by one of your wiener carts, and been strip-searched at John F. Kennedy Airport, apparently to you people, I look like someone whos got a balloon full of cocaine stuffed up their bum.
Rachel: Ill get her.
Phoebe: It kicked! I think the baby kicked!
Joey: (running from his bedroom) Oh my God! I overslept! I was supposed to be on the set a half an hour ago! I gotta get out of here!
Joey: Look, I know I feel asleep before I could shower and now I dont have time! Theyre just ten blocks away, if I run, I can make it.
Rachel: Well, I didnt see Joshua last night, but I did punch a girl in the face.
Rachel: The whole night was horrible, it was pouring down rain, and when I got there, there was no Rachel Green on the list, but there was a Rachel Greep.
Rachel: No, there is no Rachel Greep, but then this other girl overheard us and she was all, "Im Rachel Greep! Im Rachel Greep!" and he let her right in.
Rachel: No, she was already in, but then this big bitch behind me tried to steal my umbrella, so I clocked her. Ohhh! I cant believe this, all I wanted was a few hours outside of work to see Joshua, so he can go ahead and start falling in love with me.
Phoebe: Thats short for Phoebe?! I thought that was just what we called each other!
Chandler: Thats right! Where are the guys? Im ready to get drunk and see some strippers.
Chandler: Well, can I just
Ross: When we first met her, she was soaking, her feet were wet! Who wouldnt be miserable? Im telling you when I got her into a dry pair of shoes, she was a totally different person.
Ross: Ive gotta go, theres a deer just outside eating fruit from the orchard! (He hangs up and runs out.)
Rachel: I dont get this! She was horrible! (She hits Chandler, yet again.)
Chandler: Okay, Im going to go stand over there. (Points and moves into the living room.)
Rachel: I dont care! All right, yknow what Im just upset that Im getting nowhere with Joshua thatyknow what still, you do not meet someone and go flitting off to Vermont!
Chandler: Yknow, I knew something like this was going to happen. (He starts to take off his pants, revealing that he is still wearing his sweat pants.)
Phoebe: Im sorry. (Goes and hugs him)
Joey: (rushing in) Hey! Joey Tribbiani! Im here! Im here!
The A.D: Yeah, we loves em. Ive never seen him with(He gets a whiff of Joey and starts smelling around.)
Joey: Yknow, I can see why you think that, but ah, actually, you know who I think it is?
Monica: (coming back to the stage and sitting next to Chandler) Okay, Ive got some Ones, you wanna put them in her panties?
Phoebe: Oh, no umm, hi, that-that, you have to put that out, cause Im pregnant.
Phoebe: (doing the same) I really, really enjoyed it. Very exotic.
Rachel: (joining them) Well, I just checked our messages and Joshua didnt call. I mean youd think hed be worried about me not showing up at his club. Ugh, you know what makes it so much worse, Ross is all happy in Vermont!
Chandler: Ahh, come on! Yknow whatyknow what, I think Im just gonna go home and call Kathy.
Chandler: No! That was a test! In a couple of hours Im gonna get really drunk and wanna call Kathy and you guys are gonna have to stop me! And then after that, Im gonna get so drunk, Im gonna wanna call Janice
Monica: I think somebody needs another lap dance. (Motions for one.)
Joey: I guess you wouldnt believe me if I said I was Kurt Douglas, huh?
Charlton Heston: Put some pants on kid so I can kick your butt.
Joey: No-no-no, no, no, wait. You see, Im an actor, Joey Tribbiani, Im doing a scene with you today, and well, I stink.
Joey: Yeah-yeah, Im one of the cops that wont work with you cause you a lose cannon. Anyway, look, Im really sorry, but I stink!
Charlton Heston: I dont know one actor worth his salt that didnt say at one time or another, "God, I stink!" Hell, I just did a scene out there, first take, I stunk the place up. But, the important thing you must remember, no matter how badly you think you might stink, you must never, ever bust into my dressing room and use my shower! Do you understand me?!
Joey: Yes sir! Yes sir, Im-Im(he starts to leave)
Rachel: (entering) I cant believe it! He still hasnt called.
Rachel: No, I dont.
Chandler: All right, well Im gonna put my sweats back on.
Chandler: Okay, look, Im gonna have to ask you all to leave.
Chandler: Look, forget it. We tried, but Phase Three is a lost cause, Okay? Those strippers were insanely hot, and I couldnt picture myself with any of them. (Sits back in disgust.)
Phoebe: Yeah, I really liked that fighter pilot one.
Monica: Yknow, I think if I were going to be with a woman. (Chandler is intrigued.) Itd, itd be with someone like Michelle, she was so oh, she was so petite.
Rachel: See, I dont know, for me it would have to Chantal.
Rachel: Oh my goodness, she had the smoothest skin! I mean when I stuck that dollar bill in her g-string and grazed her thigh
Chandler: (jumping up) Phase Three! I just achieved Phase Three!
Chandler: I am totally picturing you with all those women!
Chandler: Well, Im there too!
Chandler: Stop it! Youre killing me! I think I just moved on to Phase Four!
Chandler: Where I dont want to have a relationship ever! I just want to have sex with strippers and my friends!!
Joey: I dont wanna.
Joey: I wanted to go to the strip club!
Chandler: I know, I know, but youre gonna have plenty of chances. There are literally thousands of women out there just waiting to screw me over.
Ross: Emily is incredible. I mean there-there are no words to describe it, I mean the whole weekend was like a dream. (Sees Rachel coming back from the bathroom.) Oh! And you! Rach!
Ross: I mean, I, I-I admit I-I wasnt quite there. Yknow, I mean the thought of you and that-that Josh guy
Rachel: Yeah, I
Ross: But now! Im there! Im totally there! Im-Im finally where you are!
Rachel: Oh, no problem. Im so glad I could help. Happy for you. (She playfully punches him.)
Phoebe: I-I wanna be with her, (points to the stripper next to her) I like her.
Monica: Wait, now, what am I doing again?
Chandler: Come on! Would you please pay attention, I could wake up at any moment!
The Cigarette Guy: Hi, Im Joshua, Im here to pick up Rachel.
Chandler: What do you want from me, Ive never met the guy. So anyway, Rachel, Im sorry you cant stay, (Rachel is upset about leaving the orgy with the cigarette guy.) but the rest of us have a lot of work to do. (The cigarette guy starts rubbing Chandlers back.) What are you doing? (The guy just nods) All right, listen, Ive got to wake up!
Joey: Yeah, did I fool ya?
Ross: I know when Im 90 shell be like 80 and it wont seem like such a big difference.
Rachel: No Yeah, all the time, constantly. It's terrifying. But you know that I figure it it has to work out.
Ross: (entering) Okay Pheebs, I know how we're going to figure this out. Okay, clear your mind and answer the first thing that comes into your head. Okay?
Chandler: Yeah okay, I was just talking to the guys. Just look at them I mean, is it okay if they come visit?
Chandler: Yes, and I was saying the actual words.
Joey: Oh yeah, I added three.
Chandler: (looks down at his clothes) Am I naked again?!
Chandler: Well Ive-Ive never done that with you before.
Chandler: I messed up. Okay? Im sorry, I really messed up.
Chandler: Im not even getting married! Okay, this is a question for science fiction writers!
Joey: I dont know! But its the same!
Rachel: I cant talk to you. I cant even look at you right now!
Ross: Hmm? (Turns around and sees that its Elizabeth) Oh, a student I dont know.
Joey: Me too. In fact, I think I might be a little too comfortable.
Chandler: No! No! No! I just kissed her.
Chandler: Yeah, I mean when you were late last night, Kathy and I got to talking, and one thing to another and
Monica: Oh my God, it was the best funeral ever! I mean, everyone loved the food, and guess what? I even got another funeral for tomorrowthe dead-guy-from-today's best friend. I mean, it is like I am the official caterer for that accident!
Phoebe: Oh no, no, no, no... That's okay, that's okay... I mean, I'm... I am a vegetarian... except for veal... Yeah no, veal I love...
Chandler: Ok, now, remember, no trading. You get the pretty one, I get the mess.
Ross: Sure, because women never like Joey. Yknow, I think hes a virgin.
Chandler: I cant believe I did this! What an idiot!
RACHEL: Yes, but I, I think about who's apartment we're gonna sleep at tomorrow night and, and where we're gonna have dinner next Saturday night. I do not think about what our childrens' names are gonna be. You know what our childrens names are gonna be.
Joey: Yeah! Much! Listen uh, not that Im yknow insecure about my manhood or anything yknow, but I think I need to hook up with a woman like right now.
Ross: I fell asleep!
Ross: I didnt know what I was taking full responsibility for! Okay?! I didnt finish the whole letter!
Ross: Well, oh just ah, I was just wondering, when you and I split up, did you get the tape that was half the last episode of M*A*S*H and half the hostages coming home?
Chandler: (coming out from behind the door) I KNEW IT!!!!
Phoebe: (entering from Rachel's bedroom) I found it!
Rachel: I did not sell you out.
Phoebe: Probably? Yeah, I don't like that word. (Chandler and Monica look surprised) Kind of what probably really means. Yeah, uh-huh. Yeah, oh, "Your mom probably won't kill herself," yknow? I'm sorry, but I'm not hanging all my hopes of Rachel and I living together on-on "Probably!" Yknow? You gotta take care of yourselves! (She starts to walk out) In this world history teaches us nothing! (Exits)
Ross: Thats okay. Shes still in there enjoying her fake party and uh, its too late to do any of the things I had planned, so
Monica: I wont give you anything, but youll owe me 2.95.
Phoebe: I know! I know! I know!
Leslie: Yeah, but, I dont do that anymore. I got kinda sick of it, and then I couldnt come up with anything good, so they fired me.
Phoebe: Alright, now I will let go if you both stop.
Dina: Joey, I am scared to death about this. But I really think I can do it, Im just gonna need some help. And Bobbys gonna be here the whole time.
Joey: Look Chandler, it was instinct! Okay? I just went for it!
Chandler: Youre right, I have no excuses! I was totally over the line.
Joey: Oh, well Im uh
Joey: Oh wow! Okay man, Im sorry. I did not mean to make you feel bad.
Joey: I cant believe this Chandler!
Chandler: (angrily) Is that supposed to be funny! I was really worried over here!
Phoebe: All right I I gotta call my mom and ask her a left handed cooking question.
Joey: Wow! (Back to reading the scene.) Well then Ill just have to carry you.
Chandler: I think so. Yeah, get off me.
Chandler: Hey, I can be pretty charming, babe, I won YOU over, didnt I?
Jill: (To Ross) And you! I throw myself at you and you say no, how gay are you?
Ross: What? No! Of course, of course I do! Are-are they gone?
Ross: Thank you! And I have to say that first scene when you meet Mac
Ross: Oh my God. I mean
Chandler: Yknow I am the groom right? I was told it was kinda big deal.
Monica: I think our lovers spat will start a little early this month.
Phoebe: (in a sexy voice to Chandler) Ill be waiting.
Chandler: (totally not crying) Well see now that I can see crying over, but Bambi is a cartoon!
Phoebe: I want to see what he wants first.
Chandler: Don't ask me, I was in there canoodling you!
Chandler: Yeah, I wanted to make a dramatic scene, but I hate packing.
Joey: Okay. Hey uh, when do I get to meet the robot?
MONICA: And, well, don't you have a lot of wild oats to sew? Or is that what you're doing with me? Oh my God, am I an oat?
Ross: We are four short of a bush-o (pause). God I feel so alive, I love being in the country!
Joey: They uh director. Uhh, her. (Points to an old woman standing behind him. Who glares at him and walks off.) All right, all right, it's not a gladiator movie. I work here.
Ross: No. No. You-you can't help. I mean, I kinda have to do this without your help.
Joey: Im sorry, it justI dont know it doesnt really look like it can do anything.
Paul: Im Irish.
Dr. Gettleman: (To a patient) I think you just have a cold, it's definitely not Strep.
Monica: All right Rach, for what its worth, I think that youre doing great. I mean yknow lets face it, no one handles this well.
Rachel: No, no dont get mad because lookthis is what happened. So I-I started packing, then I realized, "What am I doing? I am lousy at packing!" Right? But you love packing! So, as a gift to you, on our last night, ta-da!
Joey: Hmm thats weird. I dont remember being in a move called benefits lapsed.
Paul: I get that a lot.
Paul: I usually prefer Elizabeths boyfriends to address me as Mr. Stevens.
Joey: (on the other end at a pay phone) Hey, its me. Listen Casey and I were on our way back and had a little car trouble.
Paul: I had a sister.
JOEY: What? I have seven Catholic sisters. I've taken care of hundreds of kids. Come on, we wanna do it, don't we?
Paul: Im already here.
Joey: I can still hear you!
Rachel: Yeah. Your teeth? Yes, I saw them from outside. (Sitting down on the couch.) You guys are never going to believe this. But, Phoebe made out with Ralph Lauren.
Rachel: Paul. Umm, I just wanted you to know that Ross really is a great guy.
Rachel: Oh, Sophie, I guess you didnt hear about Joanna
Paul: Im just me, my wife died shortly after Lizzie was born.
Paul: Yes I did.
Chandler: Oh, is this about you-you dating the nurse? Yeah, Joey already told me, and I am so-so fine. I mean, you and I we're just, y'know, we're nothing, we're goofin' around.
CHANDLER: Well, couldn't we just lose our virginities again? Ya know, because I think actually mine's growing back.
Monica: Its harder for me! I have those four other women to compete with!
Rachel: Oh no! Yes! Of course, I know that! I justI meant yknow are you still a We or are you just You?
Monica: I am!! (Enter her room and closes the door behind her.)
Monica: I dont know. (Picks up a big plate from the coffee table.) Hey, Rachel, you want the big plate? I want you to have the big plate.
Joey: Pretty great! Except I did get a little attitude from the robot.
Rachel: I was just getting him to like you.
Ross: Okay, Ill just wait for him in here!
Chandler: I bet he can.
Paul: Ill call you later. Bye Ross. (Leaves)
Rachel: Ross, whats the big deal? So I kissed the guy!
Monica: And I don't know if you've noticed but she's a (aloud) HOTTY!! (Charlie looks at her) HI!
Rachel: Of course I packed! Monica relax! I just wanted to ask Phoebe her opinion on what I should wear tonight.
Monica: Yeah! Thats why Im sleeping with him on the side.
Phoebe: Im not writing about you! Im writing about other people.
Phoebe: I see what youre doing!
Monica: (still writing) Phyllis sees what Im doing.
PHOEBE: Yeah. Oh, except one of the strings on my guitar is broken. Hey, Chandler, can I borrow your G-string?