words in movies
Rachel: (To the woman sitting in front of her) He-he said Rachel, right? Do you think I should go up there?
Minister: As my lawfully wedded wife, in sickness and in health, till death parts us.
Ross: As my lawfully wedded wife, in sickness and in health, until death parts us. Really, I do. Emily. (Points at her.)
Minister: May I have the rings? (He is given the rings) Emily, place this ring on Rosss finger as a symbol of your bond everlasting. (She jams the ring onto his finger) Ross, place this ring in Emilys hand as a symbol of the love that encircles you forever.
[Scene: The Wedding reception, Ross and Emily are in the bathroom and Emily is yelling at him. Rachel, Chandler, Joey, and Monica are standing outside the doorway.]
Ross: (exiting the bathroom) That-that-thats all right, no honey, you take your time sweetie. Ill be right out here. (She slams the door in his face, to the gang) Shes just fixing her makeup.
Phoebe: (On the phone, in New York) Uh, hello, this is Ross Gellers personal physician, Dr. Philange.
Phoebe: Yeah, Ive discovered that Ross forgot to take his brain medicine, uh, now without it, uh, in the brain of Ross, uh womens names are interchangeable, through-through no fault of his own.
Chandler: In a foreign, romantic country
Monica: So look umm, while were st-still in London, I mean, we can keep doing it right?
Monica: Ill meet you there in two minutes.
Monica: Where were you? We were supposed to meet in the wine cellar?
Mr. Waltham: (drunkenly) The next tour of the wine cellar will plan in two in-in minutes
Joey: Well, I figured were in another country, so it doesnt count.
Rachel: (laughs) Yknow when I locked myself in the bathroom at my wedding, it was because I was trying to pop the window out of the frame.
Ross: (Bangs on the bathroom door) Emily? Emily? Im coming in. (He opens the door to reveal that the window is gone, along with Emily.)
Chandler: Listen, in the middle of everything if I scream the word, "Yippee!" just ignore me.
Chandler: Yeah, well be down in like five minutes.
Rachel: Okay, Pheebs, yknow what, lets look at this objectively all right? Ninth grade, right? The obsession starts. All right? The summer after ninth grade he sees me in a two-piece for the first time, his obsession begins to grow. So then
Chandler: (To Monica) Hey, listen, why dont we go change in my room?
Joey: Hey, dude, let me in. I got a girl out here!
Chandler: Well, Ive got a girl in here.
Joey: No you dont, I just saw you go in there with Monica!
Chandler: Well, were-were hanging out in here!
Joey: Look, which one of us is gonna be having sex in there, me or you?
Chandler: Well, I suppose Id have to say you!! But, what if were watching a movie in here?
Chandler: Wow, in 45 minutes you can find her twice. (Monica smiles at that.)
Ross: No! For all I know, shes trying to find me but couldnt because I kept moving around. No, from now on, Im staying in one place. (He sits down on the bed.) Right here.
[Scene: Ross and Emilys room, the next morning. Ross is now asleep and has his head in Monicas lap and his feet on Chandlers lap. Monica and Chandler are both still awake and depressed.]
Chandler: We have to leave for New York in an hour.
Mr. Waltham: Shes in hiding. Shes utterly humiliated. She doesnt want to see you ever again.
Mr. Waltham: You spend half your life in the bathroom, why dont you ever go out the bloody window!
[Scene: A 747 somewhere over the North Atlantic, Monica and Chandler are sitting in first class, depressed.]
Monica: Im gonna go to the bathroom, maybe Ill see you there in a bit?
(Monica gets up and heads for the bathroom, Chandler turns to watch her go and is startled to see Joey sitting in Monicas seat.)
Joey: I mean, theres no way I can make myself taller now, yknow? And who knows what science will come up with in the future, but Chandler, what if I die an unsuccessful, regular sized man?
Joey: Hey, Monica, wow youve been in the bathroom for like a half-hour.
Chandler: Yes! Good thing we have that, Not in New York rule.
Monica: Right. Umm, listen since were-we-re on that subject, umm, I just wanted to tell you that uh, well, I-I was going through a really hard time in London, what with my brother getting married and that guy thinking I was Rosss mother
Chandler: Oh. Yknow, that night meant a lot to me too, and it wasnt because I was in a bad place or anything, it just meant a lot to me cause, youre really hot! Is that okay?
[Scene: An airport in London, Ross is waiting for Emily to show up to go on their honeymoon and sees Rachel walking past.]
Rachel: No, youre not an idiot, Ross. Youre a guy very much in love.
Rachel: Ahh, yes, I will have a glass of the Merlot and uh, (points to Rosss seat.) he will have a white wine spritzer. Woo! (Looks out the window.) Hey, look at that, the airports moving. (Realizes that thats not how it works.) Hey, are we moving?! Are we moving? Why are we moving? Hey, time-out, umm, yeah, does the captain know that were moving? (Sits back in defeat.) Oh my God. Oh, my gosh.
Ross: Well maybe she wouldnt have to be selfish in bed if someone else knew where everything was!
RACH: When you were in China.
Chandler: Come in!
Phoebe: (reading from the note) Good-bye Phoebe and Ursula. Ill miss you. P.S. Your Mom lives in Montauk. You just wrote this!
Phoebe: I just felt so bad, missing this. So I just slipped him a little something, you know. As long as I'm back in five or six hours, it will be alright.
Joey: Well. I guess you think youre pretty special huh? Sittin up here in your fancy small hall building. Makin stars jump through hoops for ya, huh? Well yknow what? (Throws the script away) This is one star whos hoop This is a star that the hoopthis hoopI was Dr. Drake Remoray!
Rachel: Ross, I watched you get hypnotised in Atlantic City.
Ross: No, but ah, theres coconut in the Hanukkah Menoreoes. I tell you what, Ill put you down for eight boxes, one for each night.
(They lean in to kiss and are interrupted by the phone.)
Mr. Geller: Well, I dont know whats in the boxes down here, but I do know there are six or seven Easy Bake Ovens in the attic.
Monica: You just put an empty carton back in the fridge!
Mrs. Geller: No-no-no, that was all true. This was just in case you pulled a Monica.
Rachel: When she sees that youre gone, shes gonna know that I let you out, and that I was in here, and Im gonna get fired!
Phoebe: ( in a soothing voice) Relax every muscle in your body. Listen to the plinky-plunky music. Okay, now close you eyes, and think of a happy place. Okay, tell me your happy place.
Joey: It's easy, you just walk in on them having sex.
Joey: If you wanna get back in the car, we need the wire, your call.
Ross: Correct. In what part of her body did Monica get a pencil stuck at age 14?
[Phoebe puts the car in gear and starts to back out.]
Rachel: Yeah, I mean, you should play in public!
Chandler: Look, Im sorry! But theres nothing I can do, I think Im in love with her!
Phoebe: Oh my God!! (She runs after him, but sets of the security system, which locks the stores door and brings down a set of bars behind her, caging her in.) No! What?! Help me! Let me out! Now! (Points the musket at them.)
Chandler: Oh! (Whispers something in Joeys ear and then in Rosss ear.)
Rachel: (standing in her doorway) People are trying to sleep in here!
Woman: (looking through her peephole, we see Ross standing in the hallway.) Yesss?
Joey: No! Im putting that in my room.
Rachel: Okay! (Grabs a knife and cuts it in half.) All right, pick a half.
Joey: (Something in Italian.) (Storms out.)
Kate: No, thats not it. So, youre a soap actor? Well this must be pretty exciting for you to be in a real play, hmm?
Joey: Dont you think I asked him that before he got in?!
Rachel: Is he okay in there?
Chandler: (He is now in the box, in their living room.) Sounds like a really bad idea to me.
Melissa: Of course I remember our kiss. I think about it all the time. I can still hear the coconuts knockin together I (Phoebe is shocked.) I just didnt want to tell you cause I didnt think that youd return my love, and now that you have (Leans in to kiss Rachel.)
(They all cheer and Rachel, Ross and Phoebe join in for a group hug. Joey also joins, but he stands back a bit, because he is all sticky of the food on him)
Monica: Why? (in a motherlike tone) Do you have a report due?
All: Whoa. (they all lean in to get a closer look, Ross isn't pleased)
Phoebe Sr: Well, because youd be giving up a baby, and I-I really dontI dont know if theres anything I can say that could make you understand the pain of giving up a baby. So, umm, (Picks up a puppy in the box next to the couch.)
Benjamin: Alright, it's true. I behaved horribly. But it's only because I still love you. And I would do anything to have you back in my life.
Chandler: Thats not true! I wanted to wear my bathrobe and eat peanut clusters all day. I wanted to start drinking in the morning. Dont say that I dont have goals!
Joey: In the box.
Monica: She's this girl who used to live in the building before you did. Then she moved to England and she picked up this fake British accent. On the machine this is her message. (she apes Amanda using an awful British accent) "Monica, darling! It's Amanda calling!"
Joey: Well, it looks like it wasnt heeled after all! Yeah! So, I guess this chair is mine now! (Sits down in it and groans.)
Ross: (in his head) All right, keep going. We are phasing the accent out, phasing it out. So without out re-testing the results in the laboratory (pronounced the British way) the team would never have identified (British) the initial errors in their carbon dating analysis (British). Were there any questions at this point? (One student raises his hand.) Yes. (Points to him.)
(Kathy leaves and Chandler groans in agony. Kathy knocks on the door and Chandler opens it.)
Monica: All right, were you guys smoking something in the back of our van?
Joanna: Really? Well, in that case
Ross: Well, so, you-youll get a job here! I mean, Im always hearing about uh, them foreigners coming in here and stealing American jobs; that could be you!
(Ross wears the jackets and look at himself in the mirror)
[Scene: The Gellers kitchen, Phoebe is bringing in some dirty dishes.]
Phoebe: Monica slow down! Ok? I'm just excited to be living with him. You know I mean, I don't know, Can I see someday being married to Mike? Sure! Yeah. Y'know..I can picture myself walking down the aisle in a wedding dress that highlights my breasts in an obvious yet classy way. But do I want that house in Connecticut...you know..near the good schools where Mike and I can send Sophie and Mike Junior.. Oh my god I do.
Monica: Chandler In all my life I never thought I would be so lucky. (Starting to cry.) As to fall in love with my best my best Theres a reason why girls dont do this!
Chandler: Id carry you around in my pocket.
Joanna: Sophie, get in here! (Sophie enters) You see! Now youre making Sophie uncomfortable!
Joey/Drake: How can I? Knowing I'll never hold you in my arms again, or touch your skin, or feel your lips, knowing I'll never make love to you? How can I accept that... I can never kiss you again when it's all I can do not to kiss you right now.
(They both shiver in horror.)
Monica: So, did you play in college? (She points to his NYU Soccer (football for the rest of the world) sweatshirt he's wearing.)
RACHEL: Ya know, I just, so weird. I mean I was in there just listening to them bitch about each other and all I kept thinking about was the fourth of July.
Ross: So, uh, this guy, she used to go out with, is, uh is he still in love with her?
Joey: Arg... Alright, I'll take care of it. <throws hands out in the air>
Rachel: Oh, hi Mrs. Lynch! Is Joanna in already?
Joey: (to Kate) That guys like a cartoon. What do you see in him anyway?
Chandler: (answering it) Hello. (listens) (to Ross) Its Gandolf!!! (on phone) So, are you in town? (listens) (disappointed) Oh, well, well maybe next time then. (Hangs up)
Monica: (hums for a while, then gives up, and in her head) If it bothers you that much, just go out and get the shoes. No. Don't do this. This is stupid! I don't have to prove anything, I'm gonna go get them...But then everyone will know. Unless I get them, and then wake up really early and put them back! ...I need help! (She buries her head in her pillow.)
RACHEL: I know. And Mom, I realize you and Daddy were upset when I didn't marry Barry and get the big house in the suburbs with all the security and everything, but this is just so much better for me, you know?
Monica: Excuse me, Mrs. Burkart? Well, we're all cleaned up in the kitchen.
ERICA: You told me I was the only one. [throws a glass of water in his face]
Julie: Well, Ross and I were in grad school together.
Chandler: My Catholic friend is right. She's distraught. You're there for her. You pick up the pieces, and then you usher in the age of Ross! (Ross and Chandler look off into the distance. Joey, wondering what they are looking at, looks in the same direction)
Chandler: Look, I-Im just gonna be right across the hall and I promise you, the minute Monica and I break up Im moving right back in with you!
Ross: Look, what do you want me to do? Do you want me to call everyone in the entire school and tell them it wasnt true?!
Rachel: Oh, in my head he's done some pretty "not-gay-stuff"!
(Chandler grunts and turns around, sees that hes in sight of the room, and mouths damn!)
Ross: You know that girl I told you about who lives up in Poughkeepsie?
(And with that, an era ends as Chandler moves in with Monica as Rachel moves in with Phoebe. It tis a sad and happy time for Friends.)
Mrs. Green: Oh, Im so happy Im gonna do this for my little girl. Aw, look at you. You have tears in your eyes.
(In the meantime, Rachel has returned with the perfume and sprays a mist out in front of Phoebe who walks through the mist and does a little spin.)
Joey: Heyooh Pheebs, are they in there?
Monica: Who cares? He works in a museum!
Monica: And it has to go perfectly, because if she doesn't like something about us she can keep us off every adoption list in the state.
Joey: No, I had sex in high school.
Rachel: (shakes her head) Alright, alright look, just uh... just try to remember how you felt when you were in love, and think about that when you're playing the scene.
Chandler: You had a dream about a girl that I am seeing?! Oh, that is so cool! (To Monica) I can't tell you how many times I've dreamt about a girl that he was seeing. (Seeing Monica's stare.) (To Joey) Anyway we're talking about your dream. (To Monica) I love you. (To Joey) Your dream? (Leans in to listen closely.)
Chandler: Hes not gonna make it, hes stuck in Chicago.
Joey: Let's just say there's a well-dressed pack of dogs in Ohio. Hey Monica listen is-is Phoebe there? I gotta ask her something about the car.
Kiki: Well, we were in the city shopping, and your mom said you work here, aaand it's true!
Phoebe Sr: Its open! Come in!
Chandler: If that doesnt keep kids in school, what will?
Rachel: Umm, Chandler, you do realize that those ideas are probably already in Monica's head.
Rachel: (entering from Chandlers bedroom, I guess, and sees the foosball table.) Oh my God! I cant believe you guys are actually think youre moving in here!
Phoebe: (on phone) 'Annie! Hi. Listen we got a problem with Joey Tribbiani, apparently he missed his audition. Who did you speak to in my office? Estelle, no, I don't know what I'm going to do with her. No. All right, so your husband leaves and burns down the apartment, the world does not stop.'
Ross: Oh! I thought you guys got married in uh, January?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel and Ross are in the kitchen. Phoebe is sitting at the couch with oven mits on her hands.]
Ross: Okay, Ill be up in, (looks at the letter) 18 pages. Front and back. Very exciting.
Rachel: Its not dumb. But, maybe its okay that youre not a part of it. Y'know what I mean? (Ross looks confused) I mean its like, I-I-I like that youre not involved in that part of my life.
Joey: Yeah, you hang in there Teddy!
Frank: Well um, I was in ah Mrs. Knights ah, I mean Alice, sorry, Alice, I always do that. I was in her ah, Home Ec class.
Phoebe: Dead. (everyone is a bit upset) Oh, it's OK, no, he was old, yeah! And he lived a full life, he was in the first wave at Omaha Beach.
Rachel: Oh, I think I saw some in here.
RADIO: The next one's dedicated to Rachel from Ross. Rachel, he wants you to know he's deeply sorry for what he did and he hopes you can find it in your heart to forgive him. (With or Without You plays)
Monica: How about if I dance around all covered in sauce? Huh? You think its funny now?
Monica: I'll get it! (She runs in, and she's her old fat self like The One With The Prom Video. Not only that, she's out of breath after running a short distance. She goes over and opens the door to reveal Rachel with her old nose.) Happy Thanksgiving!