words in movies
Phoebe: Am I? Really? Am I? Well, why don't you cook Thanksgiving dinner and prove me wrong! Well, think about it, think about it, you'll be trying to top than you did last year. You'd be in competition... with yourself.
Monica: Yeah, but we haven't heard a thing from the adoption agency and it has been weeks!
Monica: Ok, let's see... Oh, the cranberry sauce, it is easy to make and no-one really cares about it.
Chandler: Dinner is at four, we'll never gonna make it back.
Chandler: You say that now, but it could take us a long time to get back home. Plus Joey could get lost and and they could have to page us to go pick him up.
Phoebe: Oh, I know, we should have been more prepared. (she looks around) It's okay. Now, the way I see it, our real competition now is Cameron. Oh my God, they just took her sweater off. Look at those arms! Hello Michelin Man.
Phoebe: (panicking) But Emma's got what it takes, she could go all the way!
Ross: Yeah, I'd probably enjoy it more if you didn't keep batting my hand away.
Joey: Oh, no, no, no, no, no. You just want to put it on your hand!
Rachel: Yes! (spells it) Y-E-S. Yes!
Phoebe: And it looks like she put makeup on her!
Rachel: Well, I don't know, you guys figure it out, I got to put Emma down for a nap.
Chandler: (peeping) Everything is so distorted! Looks like Joey has a giant hand! Which says "Rangers" on it. They went to the game!
Rachel: You know what, we just say that she said it was 5 o'clock. We'll just act casual. We're not late, we're right on time. (When she finishes talking, a note is pushed from under Monica's and Chandler's door, into the hall. Ross picks it up and reads it out loud)
Phoebe: Oh, really? Does it beat water balloon? (She places her hand over his "fire" and mimics a bursting water balloon, thus putting the fire out).
All: Alright, okay. (Phoebe reaches for the door, and tries to open it but it's locked)
Ross: Wha...? Oh sure, now they lock it, but when they're having sex on the couch, its like: "Come on in, my butt is surprisingly hairy".
Ross: (to Joey, who is wearing a blue, 3 foot hand) FOR THE LOVE OF GOD TAKE IT OFF!! (takes it off his hand and throws it on the floor)
Rachel: You guys, come on, it doesn't matter why we're late. We're all here now, please let us in so we can have some of your delicious turkey. (A slice of turkey on a piece of aluminum foil is slid under door)
Joey: I had a dream once about a fax machine that did that. (Ross picks it up)
Chandler: Guys, I'd listen to her. The vein is bigger than I've ever seen it. (Monica looks at Chandler)
(Rachel comes out of the apartment holding a pot. Joey holds in anticipation and Rachel opens it)
Rachel: Oh, I know... I still have my old key! (She goes in to get it and comes back with her keys) We can just unlock the door.
Joey: I'm telling ya... (his eyes open wide and he looks like his eyes are about to pop out. He stares at Ross like this without blinking) I can do it.
Ross: (Staring back, and then breaks off) (To Phoebe and Rachel) Yeah, he can do it!
Joey: Oh! It all looks so beautiful: the turkey, the stuffing...
Phoebe: Pies, oh, we thought you said priiiize (goes to the hall and comes back with Emma's trophy in her hand). Here! (gives it to Monica).
(Monica takes it and reads the label)
Chandler: Well, you manheads aren't any better. You lied about going to the game. You knew it would make you late, and you still went anyway.
Monica: Bring it.
(Chandler gives Monica a footlong "eye dropper" with the turkey grease in it)
Monica: Okay, try it.
Joey: It isn't working.
Ross: (looking at Joey's butt) I'm finding it really hard not to mess with him.
(The chain breaks loose from the wall, and because Joey was pushing with all his might, he propells into the kitchen, towards the table with all the food. This table has wheels underneath it, and when Joey falls on this table, he rides into the living room, with all the food falling off, until finally Joey also falls off... Joey gets up quickly, a bit agitated, and acting as nothing happened. He is covered in food stains.)
(He licks his fingers, liking it. He offers Chandler a taste.)
Ross: I know when Im 90 shell be like 80 and it wont seem like such a big difference.
Chandler: Come on Monica, its our Valentines Day. Please? Please-please, please?
[Scene: Phoebes cab, its the same arrangement as before.]
Chandler: Yeah, we have all this paperwork that needs to be filed by the end of the year. If I don't get it done, I'll be fired.
Chandler: Yeah okay, I was just talking to the guys. Just look at them I mean, is it okay if they come visit?
(The phone rings and Joey answers it.)
Monica's Boyfriend: (returning) Here we go, one Hazelnut Latte. (Hands it to Monica and sits down.)
Chandler: You mean you didnt get it from this?
Rachel: Okay. Okay. (They sit down.) I think we can do this if we just get organized. All right? We have two days to plan this party. We just need to make fast decisions! Okay? All right, where are we gonna have it?
Rachel: I can't believe it! I got a second interview!
Carol: (opening the door) Susan! Hi! (Whod you think it was gonna be?)
Ross: Uh-uhWow! Uh, I thought you guys were just like making jokes, I had no idea. What you know what? You guys are wrong. Uh yes, there is a chronological age difference but I never notice it. You know why? Because she is very mature. Besides, it doesnt really matter to me what you guys think. I mean, Im the one dating Elizabeth, not you!
Joey: I dont know! But its the same!
Ross: Yeah. Right. Save it. I can do that. (Gets up and does a little kara-tay.)
Monica: Yknow, I think if I were going to be with a woman. (Chandler is intrigued.) Itd, itd be with someone like Michelle, she was so oh, she was so petite.
Joey: Oh, oh, I got it! Pete-Chicago.
Rachel: Im sure he will forgive you. Look, we have all been there! Yknow, you fight, you make up, its just the way it works.
Chandler: (coming out from behind the door) I KNEW IT!!!!
Phoebe: (entering from Rachel's bedroom) I found it!
Leslie: Yeah, but, I dont do that anymore. I got kinda sick of it, and then I couldnt come up with anything good, so they fired me.
Ross: Thats okay. Shes still in there enjoying her fake party and uh, its too late to do any of the things I had planned, so
Ross: And it could've just as easily have been a bullet.
Ronni: Oh, uh, well, you left your good hair at my apartment, I figured you'd need it tomorrow for your meeting. (Hands him the hair)
Joey: See? Thats a great smile! Easy. Natural. Now, pretend I have a camera. (Chandler immediately does The Face.) Youre changing it!
Joey: What?! Its 6 oclock!
Rachel: Oh! Get over it soldier, we've gotta do this! (She pulls him towards her and throws him onto the barcalounger) Ok. Aha! You like that huh?
Chandler: Is it loaded? Oh, little candy hearts. (reading the candy) Chan and Jan Forever.
Ross: It'll be nice to get this off finally, won't it? Yes it will. (Marcel resists) Or we can leave it on for now, that's fine.
Chandler: Yknow I am the groom right? I was told it was kinda big deal.
Janine: Its a curling iron.
Ross: But hey, its not just me, I mean the scientists and the tour guides never sit together.
Rachel: Honey, its so sweet that you want me to stay, but I-I cant do that to you. I mean it would disrupt your entire life.
Joey: Im sorry, it justI dont know it doesnt really look like it can do anything.
Ross: Thats funny. Umm . (Pause, then serious) Its not funny.
Ross: We got honourable mention in the brother/sister dance category! Look, its almost fake midnight, do we really have any other choice?
Monica: Okay, fine I admit it! I feel terrible! Would you please rub this on my chest? (She hands him some of that Vicks Vap-O-Rub to put on.)
Monica: Yknow, it is so strange seeing Ross here this time of day, cause usually hes got the childrens hospital.
JOEY: What? I have seven Catholic sisters. I've taken care of hundreds of kids. Come on, we wanna do it, don't we?
Joey: Oh, you guys, with this joke. I gotta say, I know I cracked up, but Im not even sure I got it.
Ross: Sweetie, calm down, its gonna be okay.
Joey: Oh, it's okay. You don't have to be so mean about it.
Rachel: Ross, its okay. You can come out.
Paul: Yeah Ross its okay, its me, Mr. Stevens.
Ross: He is my girlfriends father, okay? Its-its, its weird!
Joey: Oh yeah (He mimes sticking his fingers into a jar of peanut butter, scooping some out, and eating it off his fingers.)
Rachel: Oh its important!
Phoebe: I know. But don't you think that it should be called Order and Law?
Rachel: Honey, its not just a matter of where you put it. I mean a baby changes everything. They cry all the time. I mean imagine bringing home some girl and trying to score when theres a screaming baby around.
Monica: Ok, I'll tell you what. How about I cook dinner at my place? I'll make it just like Mom's.
Chandler: (to his children) Look around, you guys. This was your first home. And it was a happy place, filled with love and laughter. But more important, because of rent control, it was a friggin' steal!
Tag: Its just not really who I am. Y'know, Ive always been happier when Why am I telling you this? You dont care about this stuff.
Chandler: (disgusted) What does it say?!
Joey: (holding a box) Well, remember when they got in that big fight and broke up and we were all stuck in her with no food or anything? Well, when Ross said Rachel at the wedding, I figured it was gonna happen again, so I hid this in here.
Ross: Well if it doesnt matter to her, it doesnt matter to me! (to Paul) Still not yelling!
Steve: Well then you can't have any. (she grabs for the package, and it breaks open. Gummi-bears fly everywhere, some into the punch bowl on the table.) Bear overboard! I think he's drowning. (he throws some Sugar-O's into the punch bowl) Hey fellows! Grab on a Sugar-O... save yourself! (Mimicking the bears) "Help! I'm drowning! Help!"
Joey: Well, it turns out you were right C.H.E.E.S.E.
Ross: Well, I don't know what else to do. I mean, I either keep my wife and lose one of my-my-my best friends or I keep my friend and get divorced the second time before I'm 30! So-so if anyone has-has a better suggestion, let's hear it! 'Cause I-I got nothing! All right, don't be shy, any suggestion will do. (There are none.) Okay then. Here we go. Magic 8 Ball, should I never see Rachel again? (He turns it over and reads the answer) Ask again later. Later is not good enough. (He shakes it up again and reads the answer.) Ask again later. What the hell! This is broken! It-it is broken!
Phoebe: I'll get it, okay. (answers phone) Hi, Monica and Rachel's. (listens) Yeah, just a second, can I ask who's calling. (to Monica) Oh, ew, it's Michelle! Ew! She, she must have that Caller Id thing. You should get that.
Monica: Okay, I think thats it. The seating chart is done. This is our wedding. They all look like theyre having fun dont they?
Phoebe: Great! Okay then its just us girls!
C.H.E.E.S.E.: The shipment never made it through Omaha?
Joey: Uh yes, but it was, we just did it once uh, in London.
Paul: Yes it does.
Dr. Leedbetter: Now-now calm down. Come look in my office, some of it my still be in the trash.
Joey: Oh well, its not on TV yet.
The Dry Cleaner: Well, then its not on the wall yet.
Joey: Whoa-whoa-hey-hey! (Motions to Chandler, "Whats going on?") Hi, Paul is it? (Paul nods yes and still hugging Joey.)
Rachel: I mean if you think about it, I mean Ross did learn something from each marriage.
Monica: Okay, Rachel, do you have any idea how painful it is to tell someone that you love them and not have them say it back?
Woman: Hey, hey, hey, her stuff wasn't in it.
Rachel: Im gonna do it too!
Rachel: But ah, youre safe from it if its in the freezer?
Joey: Nope, got it and I got yours (Pointing to Jack) too.
Rachel: Yeah I know, and I bet you thought it would be weird. But its not!
The Dry Cleaner: Ive never seen it!
Joey: Oh you should, its great.
Joey: Okay, I guess it doesnt seem that weird.
Phoebe: Look, I don't wanna talk about it. Okay?
Paul: (To Rachel) Thank you, its my moms. So this is the kitchen.
The Dry Cleaner: Russians! It showed them as terrorists and villains!
Rachel: Ugh, I knew it! Oh I cannot believe those two!
Ross: Um. I know it says black tie optional, but, um this may be pushing it a little, um.
Paul: I know. I like it up here.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, Joey and Rachel are there. Rachel is writing something on a pad, and then crumples it up and throws it on the floor.]
Phoebe: Well, its a long story. Its kind of embarrassing. Lets just say there was a typographical error with a sex manual. (The guy laughs.) How about you?
Monica: (faking joy. Rubbing her stomach and smiling at the same time, like Joey said) Mmmm! Its good!
Monica: Oh please, he didnt hear it! He didnt hear it!!
Chandler: It was working until you showed up, you big tree! I mean, this isnt fair. You had your chance with her! You had your chance and you blew it! And this is my chance and I am not going to blow it because we are meant for each other! And this is all just been one stupid mistake! (Sits down heavily.) I was gonna propose tonight.
Ross: Yes, yes it is. In prison!
(they all start to dive for the ball and Monica and Ross grab it at the same time.)
Monica: Wait a minute, Phoebe! We should be partners. We should be catering partners. I mean, think about it! You're not working right now, and we have such a great time together!
[Russ enters Central Perk. He looks like Ross, except for his chin and hair (it is David Schwimmer in a dual role).]
Rachel: Ohh, its Joshua invited me to this fancy club opening tonight. But, I already told Mr. Waltham that I would take his niece to this dumb old opera. So What are you gonna do?
Ross: Well I have to. Okay? If I dont, theyll take the class away from me. And I already put it in my family newsletter.
Chandler: (trying to cover up why his hand is over his heart) One nation, under God. Indivisible with liberty and justice for all. (Laughs.) I remembered it. (Its a butchered version of the Pledge of Allegiance of the United States for our foreign friends.) The champagne is here. (The waiter is delivering it and pouring two glasses.)
Joey: See look, women, carrying the bag. (He puts it on his shoulder and looks at himself in the mirror and likes what he sees.) But it is odd how a women's purse looks good on me, a man.
Monica: You know what would be real weird? Is if you werent there. Just say youll think about it, okay?
Joey: Its between us and the sea, Ross!
Chandler: It is to me. You wanted to sleep with Batman, and instead you had to settle for Robin. (Walks out and slams the door.)
Chandler: Yeah, its beautiful.