words in movies
Phoebe: Well, so what I like him! Do I make fun of the people youve dated? Tag, Janice, Mona? No, because friends dont do that. But, do you want my opinion? Do you want it? Cause in my opinion, your collective dating record reads like the whos who of human crap. (Walks off)
Janice: I know! I know! And then you lose your apartment! And then you lose your job! And then your ex-wife gets married so fast! And now the coffeeahh!! Ross, we need to talk.
Janice: Ooh, that decides it then. I was on the fence. But knowing that you two would be our neighbors? Ah! now we have to get it! (Chandler and Monica are utterly shocked) Ellen, we're going to talk numbers. (Grabs Ellen by her elbow and pulls her outside)
Janice: I love the way you look every night Chandler! (Monica breaks the kiss and Chandler freezes in terror.) Thats why I made you this tape! Happy Birthday! Love Janice!
Janice: Mmm-hmm. Because I know that this isn't the end.
Janice: Well umm, I thought I was going to go back to my apartment but then I just felt I couldnt really be alone tonight. (Joey walks into view of the open door behind Janice, sees her, gets a terrified look on his face, and flees in horror.) I was wondering if I could maybe stay here with you, just I really feel that I need to be with family.
Chandler: (to Janice) Dont look honey. Change the channel! Change the channel!
Janice: Oh, Im sorry honey, Im so, so, (nasally) haaaaa! Im so, so sorry, I just (nasally) haaaaaa! But I, oh what happened was, I-I-I cant breathe. Can you get me a bag, or something?
Janice: Hi, Ross. Yes, it's me. How did you know? (she laughs obnoxiously)
Rachel: He's soo lucky, if Janice were a guy, she'd be sleeping with somebody else by now.
Janice: Why are you shopping here? You don't live in this neighborhood. Were you here waiting for me?
Janice: Can I just say, I really admire what youre doing. Just raising her all alone.
Janice: Okay. All right. This is what we're gonna call it: 'Joey and Janice's DAY OF FUN!'
Chandler: (answering phone) Hello. Hi, Janice! Can you hold on for a second? Okay. (to Monica and Rachel) Okay, what do I do?
Janice: So I'm asking you please, take a moment before you judge me.
Janice: (starting to cry) You're a very sweet person Ross, umm, unfortunately I don't think I can take another second of you whining!!
Janice: Oh! Youre right. Oh God. But, before I can say good-bye, theres something I really need you to know, Chandler. The way I feel about you, its like, I finally understand what Lionel Richies been singing about. Y'know, I mean what we have, its like movie love, youre my soulmate, and I cant believe were not going to be spending the rest of our lives together.
Janice: No, you were right, you were right. I mean, I-I-Ive got to give my marriage another chance.
Janices Voice: (singing) Youre look for laughable (She does the now patented Janice laugh.)
Chandler: Ill take it! All right look, I gotta know. Are you finished with me? (Janice shakes her head no) Are you finished with him? (Janice shakes her head no) Do you still love him? (Janice shakes her head yes) Do you still love me? (Janice shakes her head yes) All right look, (grabs the bag) Im gonna need an actual answer here okay, so which is it, him or me? (his phone starts to ring)
Janice: (Startles them) There you are! Haaah, you got away from me!
(Janice turns around, Monica sees who it is.)
Janice: By the way, Chandler. I cut you out of all my pictures. So if you want, I have a bag with just your heads.
Ross: Y'know what? It sounds so weird to say this but, I just had a great day with Janice!
Janice: No, it isn't, because you won't let that happen. Don't you know it yet? You love me, Chandler Bing.
CHANDLER: Yes, Janice. Why is that so difficult for you to comprehend?
Janice: But I love my husband. And I know you love your wife. Now, I don't think we should get this house now.
Ross: Look, I didn't lose my mind! Okay, Janice and I have a lot in common! We've-we've both been divorced. We-we both have kids.
Janice: I mean this is so great! Were gonna be baby buddies! (Does the laugh.)
Chandler: Janice?
Janice: Ow!
(Janice returns from the bathroom.)
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler and Monica are sitting at the kitchen table and are still trying to decide what to do about Janice.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is still trying to ease things over with Janice, and there are about a dozen empty Espresso cups in front of him. He is extremely wired.]
Chandler: You remember Janice.
Joey: Chandler, you have to start getting over her. All right, if you play, you get some fresh air, maybe itll take your mind off Janice, and if you dont play, everyone will be mad at you cause the teams wont be even. Come on.
(Janice and Phoebe's boyfriend, Tony, walk in.)
Chandler: Hey, Janice.
Janice: What?
Janice: I got you...these. (pulls out a pair of socks)
Monica: Yeah, but Janice? That-that was like the worst breakup in history!
Janice: Oh, no. Oh, no.
Janice: Oh my God. You listen to me, Chandler, you listen to me. One of these times is just gonna be your last chance with me. (She runs off)
Janice: Im sorry I find it hard to believe that a group of people who spends as much time together as you guys do has never bumped uglies.
Janice: Oh.... my.... God.
Janice: Kiss me!
Janice: Just us.
Monica: Ohhh, Chandler, sorry! Hey, Janice.
Janice: Hi, Monica.
Rachel: Oh my god. Janice, hi!
(Janice kisses him. Monica comes out for the newspaper.}
Janice: Each.
(Janice enters.)
(Janice kisses Joey all over. Chandler smiles.)
Chandler: Hi, Just Janice.
Janice: Hello, funny Valentine.
Janice: That's fine.
Chandler: Janice is gonna go away now.
Janice: Happy Valentine's Day!
Janice: I brought you something.
Janice: I had them made special.
Janice: Okay, okay, well then answer me this. Has any of you ever.... almost?
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler is trying to get Janice out of his apartment.]
Janice: Barley? What kind of party serves barley?
Joey: Pathetic mess? I know, butcome on, man, she's needy, she's vulnerable. I'm thinkin', cha-ching! (Rachel throws a roll at Joey. He picks it up and eats it.) Thanks. Look, you have not been out with a woman since Janice. You're doin' this.
Chandler: The ball is Janice. The ball is Janice. (goes to kick the ball but kicks Rosss foot instead.)
ROSS: We'll give you Janice.
(He gives the agent his ticket and walks onto the jetway. Janice walks over and looks out the window. Chandler walks back into the terminal and tries to walk right past Janice, but she sees him.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, Janice are sitting on the couch, and Phoebe is sitting next to them in the chair.]
JANICE: Oh, my, god.
JANICE: Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry.
ROSS: You remember Janice, right?
PHOEBE: Janice? You called Janice?
JANICE: Hey, it's everybody.
JANICE: Yes, I am.
Janice: Oh! Someone's a little cranky today cuz they have to do it in a cup! (laughs) Oh! They gave you the kiddy size (looking at the cup in his hand).
Janice: (laughs) I-I-I gotta go, I gotta go. Okay, not without a kiss.
(Joey leaves with Lorraine. Chandler sits back down with Janice.)
JANICE: Helloo!!
Chandler: (in a British accent) Hello, Janice.
Janice: Well then ask yourself this. Why do you think we keep ending up together? New Year's? Who invited who? Valentine's? Who asked who into whose bed?
Janice: (holding the full cup) No, no, I'm still working on mine.
Ross: Let-let me make sure I'm hearing this right, you're ending this with me because I'm too whiney? (Janice makes an agreeing sound.) So you're saying, I've become so whiney that I annoy you, Janice.
CHANDLER: Janice was my safety net, ok? And now I have to get a snake.
(Chandler walks back to couch, where Janice is.)
Chandler: (angrily) Hey, it's Janice.
Chandler: No! That was a test! In a couple of hours Im gonna get really drunk and wanna call Kathy and you guys are gonna have to stop me! And then after that, Im gonna get so drunk, Im gonna wanna call Janice
PHOEBE: I miss Janice though. "Hello, Chandler Bing."
Janice: Say hello to Aaron, your future son-in-law.
Chandler: Just do it! Okay, it's Janice and if I get it I'm going to have to see her tonight. (phone stops ringing) Oh, that's great I'm gonna have to see her tonight.
Janice: I will go for that drink.
JANICE: And what? Missed the expression on your face? Janice likes to have her fun.
CHANDLER: Ok, Janice. Janice. You gotta give me Janice. That wasn't about being picky.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is waiting for Janice to arrive, and is angrily fllipping through a magazine.]
Woman: OH MY GAWD!! (Yep, you guessed it. Its Janice.)
Lorraine: She's checking the coats. Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off my hands. Will you get me a white Zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice.
Chandler: No, Janice.
Janice: Well, I gotta buy a vowel. Because, oh my Gawd! Who, would've thought that someday, Chandler Bing would buy me a drawer.
Joey: This is Janice.
Janice: I'll see you later, sweetie. Bye Joey.
Janice: So, I hear, you hate me!