words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the whole gang is there including Janice, theyre watching Happy Days.]
(A commercial for the Mattress King, Janices ex-husband, comes on TV.)
Chandler: (to Janice) Dont look honey. Change the channel! Change the channel!
Janice: Wait! Wait! I wanna see this. After I divorce him, half of that kingdom is gonna be mine.
Janice: Oh, I cannot believe hes using our divorce to sell mattresses.
Phoebe: Ugh! I dont know Monica. It feels funny just being here. I mean if you buy a bed from Janices ex-husband, thats like betraying Chandler.
(Joey goes to the door, but stops and looks through the window at Janice and the Mattress King, her ex-husband, kissing.)
Janice: Oh my God.
(Janice and Phoebe's boyfriend, Tony, walk in.)
Chandler: Hey, Janice.
Janice: What?
Janice: Ow!
(Janice returns from the bathroom.)
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler and Monica are sitting at the kitchen table and are still trying to decide what to do about Janice.]
Janice: I got you...these. (pulls out a pair of socks)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is still trying to ease things over with Janice, and there are about a dozen empty Espresso cups in front of him. He is extremely wired.]
Monica: Yeah, but Janice? That-that was like the worst breakup in history!
Chandler: You remember Janice.
Janice: Oh, no. Oh, no.
Janice: Oh my God. You listen to me, Chandler, you listen to me. One of these times is just gonna be your last chance with me. (She runs off)
Joey: Chandler, you have to start getting over her. All right, if you play, you get some fresh air, maybe itll take your mind off Janice, and if you dont play, everyone will be mad at you cause the teams wont be even. Come on.
Janice: Im sorry I find it hard to believe that a group of people who spends as much time together as you guys do has never bumped uglies.
Chandler: Janice?
Janice: Oh.... my.... God.
Janice: Just us.
Janice: Kiss me!
Janice: Each.
Janice: Hi, Monica.
Rachel: Oh my god. Janice, hi!
(Janice kisses him. Monica comes out for the newspaper.}
Monica: Ohhh, Chandler, sorry! Hey, Janice.
(Janice enters.)
(Janice kisses Joey all over. Chandler smiles.)
Chandler: Hi, Just Janice.
Janice: Hello, funny Valentine.
Janice: That's fine.
Janice: I brought you something.
Janice: I had them made special.
Janice: Happy Valentine's Day!
Janice: Okay, okay, well then answer me this. Has any of you ever.... almost?
Joey: Pathetic mess? I know, butcome on, man, she's needy, she's vulnerable. I'm thinkin', cha-ching! (Rachel throws a roll at Joey. He picks it up and eats it.) Thanks. Look, you have not been out with a woman since Janice. You're doin' this.
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler is trying to get Janice out of his apartment.]
Chandler: Janice is gonna go away now.
Chandler: The ball is Janice. The ball is Janice. (goes to kick the ball but kicks Rosss foot instead.)
ROSS: We'll give you Janice.
Janice: Barley? What kind of party serves barley?
(He gives the agent his ticket and walks onto the jetway. Janice walks over and looks out the window. Chandler walks back into the terminal and tries to walk right past Janice, but she sees him.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, Janice are sitting on the couch, and Phoebe is sitting next to them in the chair.]
JANICE: Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry.
ROSS: You remember Janice, right?
PHOEBE: Janice? You called Janice?
JANICE: Oh, my, god.
JANICE: Hey, it's everybody.
JANICE: Yes, I am.
Janice: Well then ask yourself this. Why do you think we keep ending up together? New Year's? Who invited who? Valentine's? Who asked who into whose bed?
(Joey leaves with Lorraine. Chandler sits back down with Janice.)
JANICE: Helloo!!
Janice: Oh! Someone's a little cranky today cuz they have to do it in a cup! (laughs) Oh! They gave you the kiddy size (looking at the cup in his hand).
Janice: (laughs) I-I-I gotta go, I gotta go. Okay, not without a kiss.
Janice: (holding the full cup) No, no, I'm still working on mine.
Chandler: (in a British accent) Hello, Janice.
Chandler: No! That was a test! In a couple of hours Im gonna get really drunk and wanna call Kathy and you guys are gonna have to stop me! And then after that, Im gonna get so drunk, Im gonna wanna call Janice
CHANDLER: Janice was my safety net, ok? And now I have to get a snake.
Ross: Let-let me make sure I'm hearing this right, you're ending this with me because I'm too whiney? (Janice makes an agreeing sound.) So you're saying, I've become so whiney that I annoy you, Janice.
(Chandler walks back to couch, where Janice is.)
Chandler: (angrily) Hey, it's Janice.
Janice: Say hello to Aaron, your future son-in-law.
Chandler: Just do it! Okay, it's Janice and if I get it I'm going to have to see her tonight. (phone stops ringing) Oh, that's great I'm gonna have to see her tonight.
Janice: So, I hear, you hate me!
Janice: I will go for that drink.
PHOEBE: I miss Janice though. "Hello, Chandler Bing."
JANICE: And what? Missed the expression on your face? Janice likes to have her fun.
Janice: Well, I gotta buy a vowel. Because, oh my Gawd! Who, would've thought that someday, Chandler Bing would buy me a drawer.
Joey: This is Janice.
Janice: I'll see you later, sweetie. Bye Joey.
CHANDLER: Ok, Janice. Janice. You gotta give me Janice. That wasn't about being picky.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is waiting for Janice to arrive, and is angrily fllipping through a magazine.]
Woman: OH MY GAWD!! (Yep, you guessed it. Its Janice.)
Chandler: No, Janice.
Janice: For Chandler!
Lorraine: She's checking the coats. Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off my hands. Will you get me a white Zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice.
JANICE: OH.....MY.....GAWD!! (Chandler rushes over and kisses her)
Joey: Look, I don't hate Janice, she's-she's just a lot to take, you know.
Rachel: What's the big deal? Why don't you wanna see Janice?
Janice: What, you can do it in the parking lot of a Taco Bell, but you can't do it at a doctor's office?
Janice: Oh, (laughs) I wish. No, you know he was just trying Ross's Hug and Roll thing.
Janice: Well, Sid and I are trying again and we had trouble last time because apparently we...
Janice: Oh, sure. Now. But what happens when he meets somebody else and gets married?
Janice: We should?
Chandler: Janice I didnt even know you were pregnant! Whos the unwitting human whos essence youve stolen?
Janice: Who's party is it?
Janice: You probably want us to move in together?
Janice: Oh, you didn't have to do this.
Janice: What are you doing here?
Janice: Are you being British?!
Janice: What woman?!
Janice: Where is this party?
Janice: Janice has a question. Who of the six of you has sleep with the six of you?
Janice: I just came up to say, "Hi!" Hi! (to Chandler) And you, sweetie, Ill see you tonight.
Janice: Oh my Gawd, I-I understand. I-I am so sorry, Ill go. (Starts for the door.) Good-bye Monica (hugs her), I wish you a lifetime of happiness with him. Chandler, (hugs him) you call me when this goes in the pooper. (Hurries out.)
Janice: Why are your eyes so white?
Lorraine: She's checking the coats. Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off my hands. Will you get me a white Zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice.
Joey: Cute! This is Janice! You remember Janice?
Janice: Just those two!
Janice: Oh my God!!
Janice: How did you know?
Janice: I dont know.
Janice: In the park?