words in movies
Monica: You guys, Joey just saw Janice kissing her ex-husband.
Chandler: Janices birthday is coming up, I want to get her something speacial. Come in here with me.
Chandler: Thats a good idea, Dear Janice have a Hubba-Bubba birthday. I would like to get her something serious.
Joey: Okay. I went down to the Mattress King showroom and, and I saw Janice, kissing her ex-husband.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is waiting for Janice to arrive, and is angrily fllipping through a magazine.]
Janice: (entering) Hows my Bing-a-ling?
Janice: Why are your eyes so white?
Janice: Oh my God!!
Janice: How did you know?
Janice: In the park?
Janice: Just those two!
Janice: Oh, Im sorry honey, Im so, so, (nasally) haaaaa! Im so, so sorry, I just (nasally) haaaaaa! But I, oh what happened was, I-I-I cant breathe. Can you get me a bag, or something?
(Janice starts to breath into it and sucks in the reciept, and then spits it out.)
Janice: The receipt.
Chandler: Ill take it! All right look, I gotta know. Are you finished with me? (Janice shakes her head no) Are you finished with him? (Janice shakes her head no) Do you still love him? (Janice shakes her head yes) Do you still love me? (Janice shakes her head yes) All right look, (grabs the bag) Im gonna need an actual answer here okay, so which is it, him or me? (his phone starts to ring)
Janice: I dont know.
Chandler: I talked to Janice.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Janice are there.]
Chandler: Janice, I have something I need to tell you, and I want you to let me get through it, because its, its, its not gonna be easy.
Janice: Okay.
Janice: Wow!
Janice: Oh! Youre right. Oh God. But, before I can say good-bye, theres something I really need you to know, Chandler. The way I feel about you, its like, I finally understand what Lionel Richies been singing about. Y'know, I mean what we have, its like movie love, youre my soulmate, and I cant believe were not going to be spending the rest of our lives together.
Janice: What?
Janice: No, you were right, you were right. I mean, I-I-Ive got to give my marriage another chance.
Janice: (standing up) Im sorry. (hugs him)
Janice: No, I-I-I gotta go. (she starts to walk away, but Chandler doesnt let her go.)
Janice: Honey, honey, people are looking.
Janice: Yeah, um, Im, Im leaving now. (tries to get her leg out of Chandlers grasp, she finally does, but Chandler takes off her shoe.)
Janice: Good-bye Chandler Bing. (walks out with one shoe)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler and Janice are having dinner]
Janice: Here, Ross, take our picture. (Hands him a camera and he starts snapping) Smile! You're on Janice Camera!
Janice: On no! No! Its not good-bye, Im not leaving until you get on that plane.
Janice: (Ross is still taking their photo) Oh, I'm gonna blow this one up, and I'm gonna write 'Reunited' in glitter.
Janice: All right. Well, there you go. (she gets extremely wound up, and begins to try and calm herself down) Stop it, stop it, stop it.
Janice: Ohh, well when you said all you were going to be doing between now and the time you leave is packing, you didnt really leave me much choice. Did you?
Joey: Why dont you ask Chandler, cause hes the one that fooled around with her. She told me you said you could really fall for her. Now is that true? Or are you just gettin over Janice by groping my sister.
Janice: All right, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, we've got to do something about our little situation here Joey. So, this is my idea: you and me spending some quality time together.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Janice are returning from their DAY OF FUN!]
Janice: Are you gonna be okay?
Rachel: Ross! Janice?!
Phoebe: You don't need Janice for that, you've got us. We
Janice: Okay.
Janice: Well yeah!!
Janice: What is wrong now?!
Janice: Yes! Yes! You did!
Ross: I just wanted to tell you something before you heard it from someone else and I hope this isn't too weird, but uh, I had uh, a thing with Janice. (He laughs, his real laugh this time.) What you're-you're not mad?
Janice: Yeah, Im riding the alimony pony. (Does the now famous laugh.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Janice are sitting on the couch.]
Janice: We're baack!
Chandler: Here's the thing, Janice. You know, I mean, it's like we're different. I'm like the bing, bing, bing. You're like the boom, boom, (Chandler flails his hand out and hits Janice in the eye)... boom.
Chandler: Oh, no, no, no, don't go! I've scared ya'! I've said too much! I'm hopeless, and awkward, and desperate for love!! (Janice leaves, Chandler then calls Janice to leave a message on her machine) Hey, Janice! It's me. Um, yeah, I-I-I just wanna apologize in advance for having chased you down the street. (runs out the door)
(Lorraine leaves. Joey shakes his head as though to say, 'It can't be the same Janice.' Janice enters.)
Ross: Okay, for instance. Let's say, Janice is coming back from a trip and she gives you two options. Option number 1 she'll take a cab home from the airport. Option 2 is you can meet her at baggage claim. Which do you do?
Janice: Oh! Sid is still in his room. I don't allow porn at home so this is like a vacation for him. So did you do it? Did you make your deposit?
Janice: Hi! Hi sweetheart! This is my husband Sid, I dont think youve met him. Ross, Rachel, this is Sid. I nabbed him a year ago at the dermatologists office. Thank God for adult acne huh? (Does the laugh.)
[The final one is from Episode 607: The One Where Phoebe Runs, Joey has been trying to repel Janice and sees its not working to his liking so hes confronting her about the sexual tension.]
Janice: No-no-no, no. I'm going to talk. I believe that the sun has set on our day in the sun.
Janice: Please, its because otherwise I really dont know what I might do.
Janice: Whats the matter? Is something wrong? Do you have to stay?
Janice: Oh, I cannot believe hes using our divorce to sell mattresses.
Janice: Oh, are you sure? Really? Because you know, you could make little puppets out of them, and you could use them in your theater of cruelty.
Chandler: Ok, Janice. Janice. Hey, Janice. Look, there's no way for me to tell you this. At least there's no new way for me to tell you this. I just don't things are gonna work out.
Janice: Oh, too soon, too schmoon. Face it honey, I am not letting you get away this time.
Joey: Yeah, you've been avoiding her ever since we started going out. Look, I made an effort to like Janice, now I think it's your turn to make an effort to like Kathy by going out to dinner with us. Right?
Janice: Joey and Janice's DAY OF FUN!!! (laughs)
Joey: Hey! (Sees Janice.) Ah!! (Janice screams in surprise.)
[Scene: Chandler's bedroom, Chandler wakes up, and finds someone else's hand on his chest. He rolls over and is shocked to see Janice there.]
Janice: Oh.... my.... God.
Chandler: Janice?!
Chandler: Janice?
Janice: You seek me out. Something deep in your soul calls out to me like a foghorn. Janice, Janice. You want me. You need me. You can't live without me. And you know it. You just don't know you know it. See ya.
Chandler: All right, Janice, likes him. In fact she likes him so much she put him on her freebie list.
Janice: So, do we have the best friends or what?
Janice: I just came by to give you a kiss, I have to go pick up the baby, so. I'll see you later sweetheart, you too Chandler. (laughs)
Janice: (laughs) I don't think we need to, because you're tripping me out right now! Are you okay?
Chandler: Okay, well. Janice said 'Hi, do I look fat today?' And I, I looked at her....
(Suddenly they hear Janice laughing, and it ruins the moment.)
Janice: So, whos the lucky guy?
Janice: Chandler?
Janice: Okay! (She runs for the bathroom)
Janice: He does?
Chandler: Janice, Im sorry but umm, you cant stay here tonight.
Janice: Why not?
Monica: (To Chandler) Our kids are gonna call her Aunt Janice arent they?
Janice: Why?
Monica: Janice, what umm, what are you doing here?
(Theres a knock on the door and Janice enters.)
Janice: (leaning in from the bedroom) Chandler! Come on, Im gonna show how to roll up your underwear and stuff it in your shoes. Its a real space saver.
Janice: (notices Monicas engagement ring) Ohh! What is that on your finger?! Im blind!
Janice: This is so fun. This is like a reunion in the hall.
The Colonel: OH MY GAWD!!!! (Yep, its Janice.)
Janice: I should just go on to happier things, okay? Umm, why dont you tell about your lovely wedding?
Janice: Oh well thats what I thought about my first husband, now Im lucky if my kid gets to spend the weekend with her father and the twins and little Ms. New Boobs.
Janice: We got the proofs back from that photo shoot, you know, the one with the little vegetables. Anyway, they pretty much sucked, so, I blew off the rest of the day, and I went shopping...(looks through her bags)... and I got you, I'm looking, I'm looking, I'm looking, I got you...
Janice: Oh well, Im divorced.
Janice: Oh, my god, I am so glad you called me. I had the most supremely awful day.
Janice: (entering) Ross you left you scarf in (sees everyone.) Hey you guys. (Does the laugh.)
Chandler: Weirdest thing. Did I hear(A nurse opens the privacy screen and Chandler sees Janice)Mother of God its true!
Janice:Too London? No-no, Rome? Vienna? Ooh-ooh, Barcelona?
Janice: Okay, Im going to need a comforter, but did you have a hypoallergenic one because otherwise I get very nasal. (Makes some weird sound) Do you have a cat? Cause its already happening. (Makes a nasal sound) Do you hear that? (She keeps making the nasal sound.)
Joey: (entering) Their not breaking up. Chandler and Janice. Their not breaking up. He didn't blink or anything.
Janice: Why?!!
Janice: Well, I knew you had the Rockys, and so I figured, you know, you can wear Bullwinkle and Bullwinkle, or you can wear Rocky and Rocky,or, you can mix and match, moose and squirrel. Whatever you want.
Janice: Oh yknow what? You have to speak very loudly when youre talking to Sid, because hes almost completely deaf.
Sid: (To Janice) Whatd he say?
Ross: Not even, say, breaking up with Janice?
Woman: OH .MY .GAWD!!! (Uh-huh, its Janice.)
Janice: I .cant .believe this!
Monica: Does that sound like Janice?
Janice: What?!
Janice: Oh. Well then shut me up. (Does the laugh.)
Janice: Chandler Bing!
Janice: Its you. This is yours.
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, Janice is being moved to the delivery room and is screaming in pain.]
Janice: (laughs) Look how nervous he gets! We havent slept together in years! (Laughs again.)
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, Chandler and Monica are entering to see if they in fact did hear Janice.]
Janice: Im telling you Rachel, listen to Janice. They all say theyre gonna be there until they start their real family.
Ross: (entering) Hey Janice!
Janice: Im gonna leave the three of you alone.
Janice: Oh, this should be easy. I have a very wide pelvis. You remember Chandler.
Janice: Oh hi!
Janice: Bye. (Exits.)
(Ross and Rachel are, needless to say, stunned at the arrival of Janice.)
Janice: Oh, what are you, stupid? Its been three hours.
Janice: So? Congratulations you two, I didnt even know you got married.
Janice: Oh, we go way back. Before Monica made an honest man out of him, Chandler used to be my little love muffin! (does her irritating laugh). So? Are you guys thinking of getting this house too? Ooh! Are we gonna have a bidding war? I'd better warn you, I'm a toughie (playfully punches Chandler, who tries to get away from her)
Janice: Ah ahahahhahaa! How great is this!
Ross: Not just Janice, Janice in labor, contracting and everything.
Janice: Oh. Oh I just cannot believe Clark stood me up!