words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk. Everyone's sitting on the couch. Monica and Joey enter.]
Joey: Hey guys!
Joey: Sure.
Monica: Joey is gonna be a celebrity guest on a game show!
Monica: (stopping Joey from answering) Ohh! Fish, seaweed, a sunken ship.
Ross: Things you find in the ocean, (to Joey) You're gonna be on "Pyramid"!!
Joey: Would you guys want to come down tomorrow and watch me tape the show?
Joey: Seriously?
Donny Osmond: Yeah! Welcome, it is Soap Opera week here on Pyramid, let's meet our contestants. First, Gene Lester is a database specialist, he's gonna be playing with "Days of Our Life's" star Joey Tribbiani! (Joey's amazed at the place and he keeps looking around till he realizes the audience is applauding him)
Joey: (to Gene) I know it could be intimidating for regular people to be around celebrities but... relax, I'm just like you! (pause) Only better looking and richer.
Donny: You crossed the line. Joey, describe for Gene these things that have lines. Give me 20 seconds on the clock, please. Ready, go!
Joey: (on the screen there's the word "Supermarket") Uhm... ok. It's a store, like a supermarket. (there is a sound indicating he made a mistake as he shouldn't have said 'supermarket'. The next word appears, "notebook") Oh! I see-I see what I did. Yeah, ok, ok, uhm... I'm writing in my...
Joey: Noo, (whispering) more like a notebook... Damn it! (next word appears: "blueprint") Oh, if I'm building an house, the plan isn't called the 'shmoo-print'... Can't say that either? Woha... hey... (the last word is "Football field" and there are 5 seconds left) In high school, I once had sex with a girl right in the middle of the...
Joey: Yeah! But that is not what they're looking for. (time's finished) OOOH!
Donny: Now Gene I must remind you, you need all six of these to stay in the game, all right? Describe for Joey things you find in your refrigerator.
Joey: Ahaha, he might as well just give us the points.
Joey: A spoon. Your hands. Your face!
Joey: Paper, snow, a ghost!
Joey: A rock, a dog, the earth.
Joey: Salami, anchovies, jam!
Joey: Paper, snow, a ghost!
Joey: Chickens?
Joey: Oh!
Joey: Ketchup!
Joey: Relish!
Joey: Oh.
Donny: Oh, time's up! Joey! You were, uh, almost on a roll there...
Joey: Yeah...
Joey: Oh, so we didn't win, but it's fun to play the game, right?
Joey: Oh, wow! I'm so sorry, ok? I promise, we'll do better next time!
Joey: Hey, you know, some of those are pretty hard! Like why would there be a ghost in my fridge? (pause). Yeah!
[Scene: At Pyramid. Joey is with the woman now.]
Joey: (To Henrietta) My friend Rachel has a kid. I totally know nursery rhymes! (makes a thumbs up sign)
Donny: Joey describe these things associated with the United States congress. (Joey goes form looking very confident to looking very shocked the instant the word congress is said) Give me 20 seconds on the clock please. Ready? Go!
(Camera goes to Joey. The clock is at 20 sec. The word "Legislature" appears. He looks at it blank faced and his eyes shift between Henrietta and his screen)
Joey: Oh, .. uh... uh... pass. (Next word: "Rotunda") Pass. (Next word: "Filibuster" stares at it a moment) Pass. (Henrietta is looking very confused) (Next word: "Addendum" 4 seconds remaining) Okay, the little thing that hangs down at the back of your throat.
Joey: Oh, then pass. (Next word: "Joint session", but time's up, Joey acts very disappointed)
Donny: O-kay... Henrietta, you didn't get all the points you needed, so that means Gene, you are going to the winners circle to try for ten thousand dollars! (Gene is clapping his hands looking very happy and so is Joey) And you're gonna be going there with Joey Tribbiani (Both of their smiles fade away instantly)
[Scene: The game show studio. Joey and Gene are sitting in the winner circle.]
Donny: Well, welcome to the Winner Circle. Joey and Gene, you guys ready?
Joey: (nervously) Yeah...
Gene: (irritable) Sure. (Joey gets even more nervous)
Joey: I-I-I don't know. Types of trees?
(Joey hears the bell which means his answer is correct and is surprised. The screen now says "5 to win" and "Spanish words")
Joey: (sympathetic) Oh, I'm so sorry. I don't know any Spanish words.
Joey: Things that go "tssst" when you put them out.
Gene: A torch, a bonfire... (Joey seems lost) uhm, your pee...
Joey: Things that burn.
Joey: Dude, dude! I think you're losing it.
Joey: Oh, oh, oh... What a dog says.
Joey: (instantly) Pizza toppings, next!
Joey: Oh, oh, oh... (5 seconds left)
Joey: Girls Chandler could never get?
Joey: Where? (looking around)
Ross: Obviously not to Joey.
Joey: (pause) What?
Joey: (pause) What?
Joey: Im tellin ya, he hasnt moved since this morning.
Rachel: Okay, but taking care of a drunk, naked woman seems like a job for Joey.
Joey: Yeah, and not put us in the middle.
Joey: (interrupting) Whoa-whoa! No-no-no-no-no, nothing is going up! Okay? Up, up is not an optionwhat's a urethra? (Monica whispers what it is in his ear.) Are you crazy?!
Monica: (to Joey) Whats so funny?
Joey: What-whats so funny?
JOEY: Wow, this is wild. What're you gonna get?
Joey: Hey you guys. Hey, you all know my dad, right?
Ross: Okay, Joey, you know what? You have to go for it. How often does this happen to you, huh? You owe it to yourself.
JOEY: Kinda looks like that stuff you get when you get a bad infection.
[This starts a series of flashbacks starting with Monica and Chandler forcing Joey to keep his new found knowledge of their secret relationship in Monicas bedroom in The One With All the Kips.]
Joey: Sure! (Monica gets very depressed) But hey, you know this way sounds good too.
Joey: Yeah, yeah. Its like my chance to give something back to the acting community.
Joey: What is the big deal? Its not like were exclusive.
Wayne: It can do this. (He moves C.H.E.E.S.E.s arm close to Joeys special area and he jumps back.)
JOEY: Oh no, can't invite her. She also steals.
Joey: Pheebs, he seems to enjoy it.
Ross and Joey: No.
Charlie: Hum, so, I started to say you something earlier, hum... (pause) There was another reason I realized it was time to end it with Joey. I kind of realized I... was starting to have feelings... for someone else.
Joey: B-bye Janice. So when ya' dumpin' her.
Joey: Now, wh-what, what is that like?
Joey: I dont know, maybe I cant. I mean, maybe theres something wrong with me.
Joey: Well, I want it!
Joey: (to Ross) Why cant I find that?
Monica: Joey, what are you gonna do when you have a baby?
Phoebe: (to Joey) Youre Franks best man?!
Joey: Listen, I know you're new, but it's kinda understood that everything from Young Men's to the escalator is my territory.
JOEY: Hey Ross, I'm aware of what I owe.
Joey: Oh, hey, Chandler, we, ah, we stopped by the coffee shop and ran into Ross.
Rachel: Yes, Joey, I remember, she's annoying, but you know what she's-she's his girlfriend now. I mean what can we do?
[Scene: The Philly, Chandler and Joey are talking to Chloe.]
Joey: Yeah, its this great part, this boxer named Nick. And Im so, so right for it, y'know, hes just like me. Except hes a boxer, and has an evil twin.
Joey: I couldnt help it, there love is so pure.
Janice: I'll see you later, sweetie. Bye Joey.
Monica: Well, if we owe it? (She throws down her cleaning stuff and jumps into his arms.) Oh my When is Joey gonna be home?
Ross: (shaking head) Oh Joey, Joey! But still, I mean, it seems like you guys are having a great time together.
Joey: Sure! As long as they dont find out you can keep whatever you want! And I want you to have it.
Joey: Hey!
JOEY: Phoebs look, if you want to know what the deal is, you're just gonna have to ask him.
Joey: Every night!!
Joey: (to Monica) Can I use your phone? (On phone) Yeah, the number for a Sidney Marks, please.
Joey: Rach, its, its ah, its not that we dont want to, really. (quietly) Are we talking models in their underwear?
Joey: oh why don't you fly out there and surprise him.
Phoebe: Oh, Joey! Oh, okay, see I didn't recognize you wearing, in those....pants.
Joey: So the ah, plays pretty great, huh?
Chandler: Wow!! Can Joey and I put them on and fight?
Joey: Oh uh, can I give you a hand?
Joey: Okay, I know it sounds crazy, but I think it might work. Yknow? The only problem is, Carls acting is (Does the international hand symbol for so-so.)
Joey: Yeah, that was real.
Joey: Then you hold on to it!!
Chandler and Joey: Hey!
Joey: Yeah, yeah, she's really into history and foreign movies... And oh, oh, she loves puzzles. Huh? Come on, who loves puzzles?
(Joey takes the ice-bucket with the champagne bottle in it and puts it on his sore spot)
Joey: Okay, now the Mastodon is from the semi-late Jurassic period.
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Look, I can sense when women are depressed and vulnerable. It's one of my gifts.
Joey: It does in mine!
Joey: Whew! Stood up to fast, got a little head rush.
[Joey walks back inside just as Rosss dance is finishing.]
Joey: Hey! What are you guys doing here? I thought youd be out partying with Gandel-worf.
Joey: Like the three musketeers, only with fruit.
Joey: Hey!!! Oww!! And Im bleeding.
Joey: Okay. Im Chandler (makes a growling/gurgling sound at the end and the girls laugh.)
Joey: If the Homo Sapiens, were in fact Homo-sapien, is that why there extinct?
Joey: Look, the point is, theres a lot of women out there you havent even had sex with yet!
Joey: (holding an empty tissue box) Wheres all the tissues?! (Throws the box down in disgust.)
Joey: Oh. (realises) Ohh. Ohh, youre out of your mind.
(Joey enters.)
Phoebe: Joey, you can't make someone do something they don't want to do. Believe me, there's something I've been trying to get Mike to do in bed and there's... he's just...
Joey: I know! I know! And Im going to talk to them about it. They mean so much to me. They Theyre like my family. If you guys are gonna be fighting all the time, I-I I dont think we can be together. It just, it just cant work. It cant. (Starts to break up) Im very upset.
Joey: All right. Chandler, you can either spin the wheel or pick a Google card.
Joey: Hey, listen you ah....
Joey: Ah, Kate?
Joey: ...feel like getting a cup of coffee?
The Director: (to Joey) Very nice. Very nice. (he walks away)
[Cut to Living Room, Rachel is sleeping on the couch, Ross is gone, the rest of them can finally emerge from their cell. They all wave good bye, and start to walk quietly out, as Monica goes and puts a blanket on Rachel. Joey starts walking all hunched over and bobbing his shoulders as he goes.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Joey are there.]
Joey: Oh, and Mississ-Pete is?
Joey: (yelling from bathroom) Hey, does somebody wanna hand me one of those tiles.
Joey: Yeah! Oh my God! (to Chandler) Is this what its like to be you?
Joey: You ah, you forgot your shoes.
Joey: Better?
Joey: I don't know. I mean I like her a lot, and she's really nice, but
Joey: Oh, forget about it. She rocks!
Joey: You guys have one of those signs that says: 'We don't swim in your toilet, so don't pee in our pool.', you know.
Joey: Hey, Kate!
Joey: Oh, hey! Joey Tribbiani.
Joey: Listen, I ah, went to that restaurant that you were talking about last week...
Joey: Yeah?
Joey: All right.
Monica, Ross, and Joey: (joining in) Home is Home Star stew.
Joey: (looks at her, shocked) What?!
[Cut to the tape Joey made in front of some famous place in London with a rather famous English-type person.]
Joey: Get out of here, really?!
Joey: Excellent! Lets play Bamboozled! Chandler, youll go first. What is the capital of Columbia?
Joey: Oh, it was great! I mean we walked all around the village. We went to this ice cream place, split a milkshake, 70/30 but still And guess what, Im thinking about taking her upstate to one of those bed and breakfasts.
Joey: Calm down, do you want this unit or not?