words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Chandler are entering, Joey is on the phone.]
Ross: She's having lunch with him. She's having lunch with him. And you should of seen the hug she gave him when she got the job. And, and, and, (to Joey) he's really good looking. (Joey gives an enthusiastic thumbs up) What am I gonna do?
Joey: (hanging up the phone) Yes! Guess who's in an audition for a Broadway musical?
Joey: It is me! It's a musical version of Tale of Two Cities. So I think I'm gonna sing New York, New York, and ah, oh I left My Heart in San Francisco.
Ross: Ah Joey, I don't think you get to pick the cities.
Joey: What?
Joey: Who?
Joey: The what?
Joey: Oh, okay. (to Ross) The what?
Joey: (singing) You've got to pick a pocket or two. Boyyyyssss, (picks a handkerchief from the pianist's pocket) you've got to pick a pocket or two..........
Joey: Really? Thanks.
Director: Listen Joey, we definitely want to see you for the callback on Saturday.
Joey: Excellent, I'll be there.
Joey: Ahhh! My ah, my agent said it wasn't a dancing part.
Director: Joey, all the roles got to dance a little. But believe me with your dance background it'll be a piece of cake.
Joey: Hey, everybody lies on their resume, okay. I wasn't one of the Zoom Kids either.
Joey: Yeah, I can dance, y'know. (starts to dance really, really, really badly)
Joey: Sure, it looks stupid now, there's no music playing.
Joey: Get out! I couldn't stop if a meteor hit me.
Joey: Well sure, you name a kid that, what do you expect them to grow up to be?
Joey: (reading) The Empty Vase. Translucent beauty...
Joey: Whoa, I'm not done.
Joey: Done.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Ross, Joey are there.]
Joey: Mark's a genius!
Joey: And before you know it, she's with him. And you'll be all, 'Ohh, man!' And he'll be all, 'Yes!' And us, we'll be like, 'Wh-whoa, dude.' And pretty soon you'll be like, (sadly) 'Hhiii,' and, and, and, 'I can't go, Rachel and Mark might be there.' And we'll be like, 'Man get over it, it's been four years!!'
[Scene: Joey's dance audition, Joey is warming up.]
Director: Ah Joey. Joey Tribbiani. Listen Joey, I got a problem, I just got a call from my dance captain, he's having a relationship crisis and can't get out of Long Island.
Joey: So, does that mean the audition is off?
Director: Listen Joey, seeing as you've got the most experience, I want you to take these dancers and show them the combination.
Joey: What?!
Director: Aw come on Joey, it's easy. Y'know, it's hand, hand, head, head, (very quickly, Joey watches stunned) up, pas de bouree, pas de bouree, big turn here, grand sissone, sissone, sissone, slide back, step, step, step, and jazz hands!
Joey: It's ah, step-ity, step and jazz hands.
Joey: Bye. (does the jazz hands)
(The group does the same horrible dance that Joey did earlier in the show, except they're all out of sync and they do the jazz hands at the end.)
Joey: I know, it was the best I could get out of them.
Joey: People, people, people.
Director: Let's try it again, and this time let's watch everybody watch Joey. (to Joey) Show 'em how it's done. (to the pianist) Count it off.
(The pianist starts to play, and Joey readies himself, and then runs out of the audition.)
Rachel: Just tell Joey that you watched the tape and you liked it, but your bosses didn't. Then that way, you're the good guy and they're the bad guys.
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Joey is struggling with the fridge. He finally gets it open and falls on the floor]
Joey: I was tryin to make a sale!! Oh, man, if I ever run into that guy again, do you know what Im gonna do?
Joey: Well, this-this-this was great. Didnt everybody have a great time?
JOEY: (to Chandler) What'd I tell you? What'd I tell you?
Joey: I'm thinking we've got a bookcase here.
Joey: That makes more sense.
(Joey runs off down the hall. Ross tries Monica and Rachel's apartment, but it is locked so he has to stand in the hall and pretend he wasn't listening. Chandler and his mom come out)
Joey: Ok, thank you. And I promise you I will not forget this one. (he starts writing on his hand) Mandy.
Chandler: No, see the thing is I want to get out of here before Joey gets all worked up and starts calling everybody bitch.
(Camera moves to Chandler, Phoebe, Ross, and Joey sitting in living room)
(They almost kiss and then Joey realises her kids are staring at them)
Chandler: If you wanna give Joey a Christmas present that disrupts the entire building, why not get him something a little bit more subtle, like a wrecking ball, or a vile of small pox to release in the hallway?
Joey: (laughs) No. But I got Knicks tickets for you, me, and Chandler.
Joey: Ross, did you really read all these baby books?
Joey: All right, so well get a little coffee, and get energized, and well head back out.
Rachel: (gets up from the sofa and moves to the kitchen but Joey blocks her way) Oh, sorry... Oops, sorry.
Joey: Same kind of thing happened to me! Woman pizza delivery guy come over, gives me the pizza, takes the money, and leaves!
Joey: Need a new table.
[Scene: Phoebe's cab, Joey and Chandler are headed across the George Washington bridge on their way to Las Vegas. Joey is driving.]
Joey: Hey? what? what? wey! whoo! what? what!?
Joey: That's the rule.
Joey: Yeah
Joey: Why not?
Joey: You knew about that?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Chandler use their knees as a table to support the lasagna.]
Joey: How'd you get to that?
Joey: I say push her down the stairs.
Joey: Why, are you moving out?
Joey: Ok, ok, How about if we split it?
Joey: You'd tell me if you were moving out right
Joey: Well, that is usually what I would do. But I just never thought youd be on the receiving end of it. How could you do this?!
Joey: No, its not. I mean you-you made me your best man and I totally let you down!
(Joey and Chandler come back)
Joey: Whoa, store will be open tomorrow!
Joey: Or an uncle...
Joey: Yeah-yeah, its down to me and two other guys.
Joey: Sure, sure. Ok, (clears his throat and starts to read from his script. He starts talking in a fake French accent, making gestures with his hands) "Bleu de la bleu, de la blu bla bleu" (Phoebe looks astonished, annoyed and disgusted, Joey seems very proud though) See?
Joey: I don't know, birds just don't say, "Hello, sit here, eat something."
Joey: Will you pick one, just pick one! Here, how about that one? (points to a table)
Ross: (noticing the pipe and looking at the door) Joey wheres the pipe that was holding the door open?
Joey and Chandler: Ooooohh!
Chandler: Fine. (Joey and Chandler walk towards the door)
(They all start out, Rachel gives each one a kiss, and says "bye." In the hall, Joey says )
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Chandler is looking at the foosball table.]
Casting Director No. 2: Next. (Joey walks onstage)
Joey: (offended) Oh well I think I am, yeah and I think I'm definitely gonna get the part.
Joey: (announcer voice) Rightie-O Ray!
Joey: (entering, with Dina) Here she is! Future fashion superstar!
Joey: You cuddled.
Joey: Hey!
Joey: Wha-
Joey and Chandler: What is it?
(Joey and Chandler run in)
Joey: Oh yeah!
Chandler: (to Joey) One more game?
Joey: Yes, I am. As of today, I am officially Joey Tribbiani, actor slash model.
(Joey enters with his dad)
Joey: But I got to act with a robot Pheebs, and-and I dont know anything about technology! I cant even use Chandlers computer except to find porn! And-and thats only cause its right there when you turn it on!
Joey: Since then?!
Ross: Okay, Joey, you know what? You have to go for it. How often does this happen to you, huh? You owe it to yourself. (Walks towards the door until )
Joey: C'mon! Just try to picture her not pregnant, that's all.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Joey are still playing catch.]
Joey: Oh man. Please tell me one of 'em is Ma.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is repacking the furniture into boxes to return it.]
Joey: All right, how about the ladybugs?
Dr. Long: (To Joey) Uh, if you have any questions, heres some information on Braxton-Hicks. (Hands Joey a pamphlet.) Oh and by the way, you did the right thing by bringing her in. Youre gonna make a wonderful father.
Joey: Hey. Can, uh, can we help you?
Joey: Night, you guys.
Joey: I'm Joey Tribbiani.
[Scene: Joey and Janines, Joey is pacing around as Chandler and Monica enter.]
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, is the one where Rachel screwed up the desert and Ross and Joey are trying to enjoy it.]
Joey: Yeah, yeah, and then Adrian, she maybe she could wrap her legs around his waist.
Joey: What's the matter with Rog?
Joey: No you won't.
Joey: Then you gotta come clean with Ma! This is not right!
Joey: Well, either you break it off with Ronni
Joey: (To Rachel) Hey, I was pretty close. (She just glares at him.) Uhh, so bad news. Umm, I cant buy the boat, I dont have any money.
Joey: No.
Joey: You really think so?
Joey: She was nothing compared to you.
Joey: Thanks, Chandler. (Snuggles up to him)
Ronni: Yeah, uh, Joey said I could use your shower, since, uh, Chandler's in ours?
Rachel: Okay Bobby, why dont we just come over here and let them have a little moment. (Drags Bobby away from Joey and Dina.)
Joey: (Runs out in a towel) What's the matter with you?!
CHANDLER: Stay back, I've got kiwi. Run, Joey, Run!
Joey: Hey! Terry.
Joey: Chandler, will you just come in already?
Joey: Hold on, you-you knew?
Joey: Oww! Big ring!
Joey: I didn't know that! Well, what a pretty last name!
Joey: I'm sure he's not more bummed out than I am.
Joey: So then how could you I mean, how could you?!
Joey: I'm...happy...for you?
Joey: Ma, I'm sorry. I just did what I thought you'd want.
Joey: With this ring? (Her engagement ring.) No contest.
Ross: So Joey, you okay?
Joey: -Peaches?
Joey: Who cares, we'll eat at the sink! Come on, let's play!
Monica: Joey!! What the hell were you doing?!