words in movies
[Scene: Coffee place, Joey is there, Chandler is entering]
Joey: Hey. So where's Mon?
Joey: And you're not helping?
Joey and Chandler: (start to sing) Hey! Happy birthday ...
Ross: Uh, good news everyone, we finally found a nanny. This is Molly (points to Molly). Molly, Chandler, Joey.
Joey and Chandler: Hi.
Joey: You damn right I am, I've been waiting for a cookie for 7 minutes.
Molly: Nice to meet you guys (to Chandler and Joey).
Joey: Yeah, you too.
Rachel: And Joey?
Joey: How do you think she's doing?
Rachel: So hot I cried myself to sleep last night. (Joey and Chandler clap their hands)
[Scene: Coffee place, Molly holding Emma and talking to Joey]
Joey: Man, I wish I had a nanny like you.
Joey: Sure.
Chandler: Looks like Joey is doing allright with her.
Monica: Yeah. Hey, that was nice of you guys to back off and let Joey get the girl for once.
Ross, Joey and Chandler: Bye, Emma-Wemma-Demma.
Rachel: (to Joey) Hey, listen, Joey, about Molly, I really prefer if you didn't go after her.
Joey: Why not?
Joey: So, what, you think I'm just gonna sleep with her and never call her again and things are gonna get uncomfortable? (thinks about it) Yeah, sounds about right.
Joey: Oh, man, why did have to go and say that for? Now that you told me I can't have it makes me want her even more!
Joey: Yes!
Ross: Joey, come on now, for me! Please, just-just try to focus your sexual energy on someone else.
Joey: Fine. (looks around, then focuses on Monica)
Ross: Listen, can you do me a favor? I'm gonna be out today. Can you just keep an eye on Joey, make sure nothing happens between him and Molly?
Ross: Wh - No. Some woman who sounded a lot like Joey called earlier and asked for her daughter, the "hot nanny".
Chandler: Allright, fine, but don't blame me if it doesn't work. Because you know as well as I do that once Joey sets his mind on something, more often than not, he's going to have sex with it.
[Scene: Hallway, Joey get out of his appartment and Chandler jumps out of his]
(Joey falls on floor and gets up)
Joey: For a walk.
Joey: Actually, that will be long. You know, I really need to organize my thoughts.
Joey: Allright, fine, I only have one thought! It's about the hot nanny, I gotta see her!
Joey: Now YOU'RE telling me I can't see her?? You guys are killing me! She's forbidden fruit! It's like ... like she's the princess and I'm the stable boy ... Why are you doing this, huh? Did Ross tell you not to let me go over there?
Joey: Huh. Interesting. Now there are obstacles. Hot nanny and me against the world. This is the kind of stuff great novels are made of.
Joey: Fine ... mediocre porn
(Joey comes over)
Joey: Hey Rach, so can I sing happy birthday to you now?
Joey: Oh ... (Starts to sing) Happy birth ... (sees Molly leaving) oh, see you later (runs after Molly)
Ross: Where the hell are Joey and Molly? I asked you to watch them.
[Scene: Ross's place, Molly and Joey are talking on the couch]
Joey: So you see, Molly, what people don't understand is that acting is a discipline. It takes a lot of hard work.
Joey: Oh, I didn't go to college.
Joey: Molly ... people don't study acting ...
(Ross and Chandler walk in, Joey looks disappointed)
Joey: (upset) Will the stable boy never get the princess??
Joey: No ... the leather sticks to my ass. You know, this isn't fair. What makes you think that I'm just gonna sleep with her and then blow her off? Huh? Can't you guys open your minds to the possibility that I actally like her, and might want something real? (pause) Look, the truth is, I haven't felt this way about anyone since Rachel, ok? I didn't think I could ever love again.
Joey: Ok (admits)
Ross: Ok ... (they leave the room, long pause) Well, uh, Joey, I guess we have no problem.
Joey: It's like my favorite fairy tale come true! (Chandler looks at him) The princess, the stable boy and the lesbian!
Joey: Well, you wouldn't let me in, so I thought you were in trouble.
(Joey leaves and closes the door behind him. Chandler walks towards the living room, but then Joey enters again.)
Joey: (disappointed) Oh... oh, but that's ok, I'll find someone else to do it... I'll do it alone, but... I don't know what happens if the sea turtle catches you...
Joey: Ok, ok! (He leaves)
Joey: (to Chandler) Bert! Bert! Bert! Bert!
Joey: I forgot my bat.
Chandler: I can explain... Joey...
Laura: Joey, wait!
Joey: No, no! Don't try to turn this around on me, ok? I'm not some kind of... social work, ok, that you can just... do.
Joey: LAURA! (and points to her, very confident)
Amy: Oh, I can’t, honey. I’m gonna go get my eyebrows shaped. (points at her eyebrows) I am not happy. (to Joey who has a pizza box in his hands) Oh... sure you wanna eat that?
Joey: Oh whoa-whoa wait a minute! I have to do it?!
Joey: Don't you put words in people's mouths, you put turkey in people's mouths!
(Joey gets up and look annoyed)
Joey: (entering) Hey! Hey Chandler look, I know youre mad, but I just want to say Im sorry. I-I was a total jerk. Completely o-over the line. Uh, I just I hate pulp! Yknow? I mean, yknow how Monica feels about low fat mayonnaise?
Kathy: Well, uh, when Joey gave it to me, he said, "This is 'cause I know ya like Rabbits, and I know ya like cheese." Thanks. I love it. And I know how hard it must have been for you to find.
Joey: (entering) Hey, Chandler, you got a minute? I-I really need to talk to you.
Joey: Oh.
JOEY: Well, I think it went pretty well. I.. I got a callback for Thursday.
Joey: Yeah, they're great seats too!
Joey: Center ice.
(Ross and Joey enter)
Ross: Hey! Hey, guess what Joey has!
Joey: So we'll leave before it's over, we'll be back in time.
Joey: Yeah!
Joey: Dude, two times that happened!
Joey: Right, I guess. Alright, so see you at four.
Joey: Ross and I were helping the girls pack, took a little break, I lost $1,500 to him in Cups!
JOEY: Let me get this straight. He got you to beg to sleep with him, he got you to say he never has to call you again, and he got you thinking this was a great idea.
Joey: I know, yeah.
Joey: (walking up carrying a brown paper bag) Hey!
Joey: Oh, Bob, get off the guy!
Joey: I don't know...
Joey: Okay.
Joey: Ohhhh! These seats are great!
Joey: How late are we?
Joey: Oh, no, no, no, no, no. You just want to put it on your hand!
[Scene: The corridor. Ross and Joey have just arrived.]
Joey: Wow (He opens his apartment door and throws their stuff in.)
Joey: Yeah, where were you!
Joey: Hmm thats weird. I dont remember being in a move called benefits lapsed.
Joey: You are not at Thanksgiving?
Joey: (realizing) Oh! That's Alicia Mae Emory's outfit!
Rachel: Joey, you cant let him get away with that. Ya know what, Im not going to let him get away with that. Im going to say something to himNo, I really shouldnt say anythingNo, I should say something to him. (Goes to the counter) Gunther, I want you to give Joey his job back. That is really not fair that you have to fire him
Ross: (to Joey) HEY!
Joey: Actually, you know what? I am. That whole thing with Rachel made me realize that maybe I'm ready for a more serious relationship. You know? Like I'd like to meet a nice mature commitment-minded lady. And looks aren't as important as...Nah, she's gotta be hot.
Monica: What? Are you serious?! (To Chandler) Joey smells gas!
[Scene: Pier 59 Studios, its the set of Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E. The producer is showing Joey around the set.]
Joey: Ok, let me stop you right there. The Mets suck, ok? You wanna see the Yankees.
Joey: (whispering) Who do you think its from?
Joey: Listen that�s a pretty girly hour we just spent, we should add some manly make up for it.
Joey: Ooh! Well played, Phoebe Buffay, well played.
Joey: Oh! It all looks so beautiful: the turkey, the stuffing...
Joey: No! No, and I did not ask her to marry me!
[The next one is from Episode 608: The One With Rosss Teeth, Chandler is accusing Joey of becoming less of a man.]
[Scene: The Emergency Room, Joey is miming hockey pucks kitting foreheads. Chandler realises it's getting tense and goes to the receptionist again.]
(Joey gives him the okay symbol, and Ross rushes towards him to be stopped by Chandler. Meanwhile, Phoebe goes over to the snack table as some guy, which turns out to be Ursula's fianc�e Eric, walks in and smacks her butt.)
Rachel: No. Joey, she knows! We were at Ugly Naked Guy's apartment and we saw them doing it through the window. (Joey gasps) Actually, we saw them doing it up against the window.
Joey: (to Ross, mouthing) Don't make me come up there!
Joey: Fine! Let's just go. I don't need your stupid dinner.
Joey: Sorry!
Joey: Ha!
Monica: Joey, that is not gonna work.
Joey: Yeah! You three have a nice Thanksgiving.
Joey: Oh-oh! I'm stuck!
Joey: Okay.
Joey: No seriously... I'm really wedged in here.
Joey: Alright, hurry up, you gotta do something.
Joey: It isn't working.
Joey: Oh, that smells good!
Ross: I gave them to Joey.
(Joey tries to pull back at all his might.)
Joey: Yknow I dont think you should be talking at all in there! I think youve got to much thinking to do to be talking and making jokes!
Joey: Interesting...
Joey: It's really starting to hurt.
Joey: I left them at the park.
Joey: Yeah! Come on!
Joey: Ooh! Stop putting things down my pants!
Joey and Chandler: PUSH! PUSH! PUSH!
Joey: Oh, I know how you feel...
Joey: But just think, ok? What if everything goes right? What if this woman does pick you guys?
Joey: So... who's your friend?
Joey: OW, why, why, why?
Rachel: (to Joey) Hey, who's Phoebe with?
Joey: Saraaah.
Joey: Oh, name one friend of yours that I did that with.
Joey: I know why I don't remember her, huh? (he winks at Rachel)
Joey: Keep going Pinocchio!
Joey: Hey.
Joey: Well...
Joey: Nope.
(Joey looks satisfied)
Rachel: Oh, yeah. Joey doesn’t share food. I mean, just last week we were having breakfast and he had a couple of grapes on his plate and ...
Joey: (to a customer) Are you all finished here?
Joey: ALL FOOD!
Phoebe: (to Joey) You wouldn’t let her have a grape?
Joey: Mandy, uh? Uh... really hot blonde, big boobs?
Joey: It's a one-woman play called "Why don't you like me: a bitter woman's journey through life".
Joey: Yeah. And look, I just want you to know that with Rachel staying here and everything, all my feelings from before are totally over, okay? And even if they weren't, when you accidentally walk in on a woman using a breast pump...
Joey: I think were not wearing the same shirt anymore!!