words in movies
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is trying to move Joeys chair and not having much luck at it as Joey enters.]
Joey: Hey.
Joey: What are you doing?
Joey: (laughs) Why would you want to do that?
Joey: Rach, there is a decent place to
Joey: No. No. No.
Joey: No. Rosita does not move.
Joey: As in Rosita does not move.
Rachel: Joey, its just a chair! Whats the big deal?
Joey: The big deal is that it is the exact equal distance from the bathroom to the kitchen and its at the perfect angle so you dont get any glare coming of off Stevie.
Joey: (glaring at her) Is there a problem?
Rachel: No! (Joey sets his beer and bag of chips down and heads into his room.) Oh what does he know! Come on Rosita, us chichas got to stick together! (She tries pulling on the back of the chair, until the hinge breaks and the back falls off.) You bitch!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is examining the injury to Rosita while Rachel is apologizing to him.]
Rachel: Joey, Joey I am so sorry.
Joey: I told you not to move it! Rach, how would you feel if say, I wanted to move you mom, and you said dont, and I did it anyway and her head fell off?
Rachel: Okay, come onJoey, Ill buy you a new one! All right? Well go down to the store right now and well-well get you a new chair.
Joey: (slowly turning and glaring at her) Shes not even cold yet!
Joey: Thats true.
Joey: Yeah, I (Shuts off the TV.) I dont want Stevie to see her like this.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Chandler is entering.]
Chandler: Joey! Joe! (Sees that hes not here and starts investigating. He picks up the bag of chips.) Full bag. (He picks up the beer.) Beers still cold. Something terrible mustve happened here! (He decides its not that important; sits down on Rosita, and the back falls off causing him to flip over.) Oh no-no-no-no-no-no! (Runs over to Stevie.) Stevie, I was never here! (Runs out.)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Chandler has replaced Rosita with his chair.]
Chandler: My chair. Now, if anybody asks, your name is Rosita! (He runs out the door, grabs the back of Rosita, and we can hear Joey and Rachel talking as they are coming up the stairs. Neither of them have reached the landing yet.)
Joey: No I wont.
Joey: Because, I know what I like and what I dont like! Its not the same thing!
Joey: I dont know why you say that so soon.
(Joey and Rachel reach the landing just as Chandler closes the door.)
Rachel: Come on Joey, I just bought you a new chair! The most expensive one in the store! Hey, yknow what I was thinking? We could name her Francette.
Joey: Francette? What is she? A couch?
Joey: Poor thing. Cut down in her prime.
Rachel: Joey, the new chair will be here in an hour. Maybe we should actually move Rosita out of here. Yknow, start the heeling process?
Joey: Well, I guess youre right. Maybe, maybe Ill take her down to the incinerator. Its gonna be so said, and kinda cool. (He goes to remove the back, but it doesnt come off. So he sits down in it, puts his feet up, stands up, and looks back at it.) Shes heeled!
Joey: No its not weird, its a miracle!
Rachel: Its not a miracle Joey! Im sure theres some explanation.
Joey: Oh there is! If you want something enough and your heart is pure, wondrous things can happen!
Rachel: Joey, I really dont
Joey: (interrupting her) Can you tell me how this happened?
Joey: Miracle!
Joey: Someone like an angel?
Rachel: Thats right Joey, the chair angel came in and heeled your chair. (She sits down in the chair.)
Joey: (angrily) Get your non-believer ass outta my chair! (She gets up and heads for her room.)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is sitting the now heeled Rosita as Rachel is sitting in the newly arrived Francette. Francette is one of those new chairs from La-Z-Boy that has and does everything except cook and go to the bathroom for you. Its got a small refrigerator under one armrest it has phone jacks for the Internet and regular phone, and so much more.]
Joey: Yeah, me too. (He flips up his armrest in disgust.)
Joey: Fine.
Joey: No. Really?
Joey: (quietly) My chair heels itself.
Rachel: Well, its a long story, but umm I broke Joeys chair
Chandler: Whoa-whoa-whoa! You broke Joeys chair?
Chandler: I thought I broke Joeys chair! Thats why I replaced it with mine!
Chandler: Im gettin my chair back! (Heads for Joey and Rachels.)
(They enter Joey and Rachels to find that Joey has broken Chandlers chair.)
Joey: Well, it looks like it wasnt heeled after all! Yeah! So, I guess this chair is mine now! (Sits down in it and groans.)
Chandler: Joey you broke my chair!!
Joey: Your chair?!
Joey: So, there was no miracle?!
Joey: (sarcastic) Oh no this is devastating! My faith is shaken. Im so glad I have the new chair to get my through this difficult time in my life.
Rachel: Uh-huh! Nice try, but you dont get that chair anymore! All right? That is my chair now! You can sit on my lap! (Joey starts to get up.) No I take that back!
(Rachel and Joey both laugh at that suggestion.)
Joey: How do you figure?
Chandler: Because you (Points to Joey) broke a chair and you (Points to Rachel) broke a chair! The only one around here that hasnt broke a chair, is me!
Chandler: So Joey breaks my chair and I get nothing!
(Joey whispers in Rachels ear to confirm his response.)
Joey: Thats right!
Joey: Yeah! We are!
(Rachel whispers in Joeys ear.)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is sitting in Joeys lap on Francette, and theyre both groaning.]
Joey: Oh yeah.
Joey: Ahhh (To Rachel) Eh?
Joey: Hey!
Rachel: Oh yeah, Joey broke it. Had to get rid of it.
Joey: Hey! Tag's still talking to the police.
[Joey stands up again. Rachel enters the door]
[Rachel walks past Joey towards the couch]
Joey: All right well, Id better take that back.
Joey: If you said it like that, you probably did, yeah.
Joey: Erin! Still here!
Joey: Huh, Rach I got to say its gonna take a lot of money for me to go out on a date with a dude.
Rachel: Well Joey, I hate to admit it, your way of sailing is a lot more fun.
Joey: Hey.
Joey: Fine! All right, Ill do it. But hey! You guys have to be at the next table so you can stop me if I yknow, start to say something stupid.
Joey: Well, first it's not a purse.
Monica: Joey!!
[Scene: The Animal Hospital, the guys have taken the duck in to remove the ring. Joey is pacing around like an expectant father.]
Joey: Yeah?
Chandler: Well, either that or uh (Motions towards Joeys door.)
Joey: Hey Pheebs?
Joey: Yeah-yeah I like that but just to go in another direction
Joey: (about to cry) Those two only had each other!
Joey: Youre right. Maybe I shouldnt even go on the call back.
Joey: Hey Rach?
Rachel: Oh my God! Joey!
Joey: Wait-wait-wait-wait! (To Chandler) Come on! Come on, lets trade! The timings perfect, I just clogged the toilet!
(Joey laughs nervously and goes to his bedroom.)
Joey: Yeah right! (Gets up for a refill to his snow cone.)
Joey and Chandler: Yeah, thats her.
Ross: Joeys asking if youve just ruined the first book hes ever loved that didnt star Jack Nicholson?
Joey: Oh, very funny. I dont know if you remember, but my audition was supposed to be Thursday. (Chandler doesnt say anything until Joey figures it out.) You got me the audition?! Lets hug it up! (They hug.)
Monica: Oh, you really want to talk about getting people to like you huh, funny man? (Joey laughs but stops when Chandler turns to glare at him.)
Joey: No way! I've been going to the guy for 12 years.
Joey: We don't? We really should. From now on, 'Bert' will be our code word for danger.
Joey: (Confused.) But, he loves Emily?
Chandler: Joey!
Joey: Whats up buddy?
Joey: Waiting for candy.
Joey: Yeah lady! Give us candy!!
Joey's Hand Twin: (To Joey) If you leave now, I will chop off my hand and give it too you!
Joey: (entering) Hey!
Joey: I just wanted to come by and yknow, wish you good luck on your date.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is eating cereal from a bowl she has balanced on her stomach as Joey, Chandler, and Monica return.]
Ross: All right. (Reading.) A room. A man enters, he looks suspicious. (Stops reading a flips the page to find the next one is blank.) That's it? (Joey shrugs.) Joey, you're supposed to have five pages done by now! Including an exciting incident! (Flipping through the rest of the pad.) And what is, and what is all this?! (Reading.) The official rulebook of Fireball.
Bobby: You bet I am! (To Joey) And to answer your earlier question, were straight-up gangster rap. (Joey shakes his head as if hes about to lose it.)
(Joey thinks that sounds familiar, but dismisses the thought.)
ROSS: Joey, you owe $1100 at I Love Lucite.
Joey: Who cares?! I-Ill make payments, whatever it takes, I want the Mr. Bowmont!!
Joey: Yeah. What time are you meeting her?
Joey: A little uh, good deed for PBS and a little TV exposure, now that's the kind of math Joey likes to do!
Joey: Let me know about that coconut phone, it might great for the boat.
Joey: You mean how they're friends and nothing more? (Glares at Rachel.)
Joey: (yelling) No! Drums!
(Rachel heads for Joey and Chandler's and Phoebe heads for the kitchen to find Ross.)
Joey: Wow, thats in like 20 minutes. Youd better get dressed.
Joey: (walking to a table with many badges on it) I know we're not, but (he picks up a badge) Frank Medeio and... (picks up another badge) Eva Trorro... womba...
Joey: Oh. Well good! (To himself) For me. (He picks up a jar of lotion.) What is this? Did you give yourself a facial?
Joey: Rach! Rachel! Okay, the next highest bidder is at table one.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is there as Tag enters carrying a bag.]
Joey: Hey-hey, Pheebs, check it out, we already learned a song. (To Rachel) Ready? One, two, three, four...
Rachel and Joey: Tequila!!
Joey: Hit me! (He does so.) Ohh man! (Joey busts and loses all the money, but when the dealer starts to collect the cards Joey notices something.) Wait! (He holds his hand next to the dealer's hand.)
Rachel: Joey, yknow that you could just not throw the sticks up in the air.
Joey: What youdont hold it like that! Youre lettin all the good stuff fall out.
Joey: What is Rock 'n' Roll about that?
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is getting a phone number from a woman (Casey) as Chandler watches from the doorway.]
Joey: Ugh. Now if a cow should die of natural causes, I can have one of those right?
Phoebe: Because you would rather live here with Joey.
Monica: Joey, youre this guys teacher. I mean how could you do this?
Joey: Okay dude! (Finds a receit.) Hey you uh, you sent Kristen flowers.
Ross: Because its the highest. (Joey shrugs his shoulders) Okay, Rachel youre up first. (Rachel stands up and gets ready.) Situation No. 1: Youre with Monica, the wedding is about to start when Monica gets cold feet. Go! (Joey is playing the part of Monica.)
Joey: Yeah, and I met this really hot single mom at the store. What's an elf to do?
Joey: You spent a hundred dollars. Thats the limit. Youre screwed!
Rachel: Phoebe, its okay. I like living with Joey.
Joey: I got this pair marked excess, I gotta tell ya, there was no room for excess anything in there.
Rachel: Joey, would you just come out here and stop being such a baby!
Joey: Cage closed?
Joey: (yelling from the bedroom) Is it back in the cage?
Joey: Oh-oh! So thats the way its gonna be huh? Yeah I can break the rules too yknow!
Phoebe: Okay. (Joey exits.)
Joey: Ill see you at 8:00.
Joey: (To the gang) Hey, no matter what happens with Ross and Emily, we still get cake right?
Joey: Yeah, yeah. Hey, why dont you give a pull on that rope? (Points.)
Phoebe: Well, Ill tell you Rachel Karen Green, I had plans with Joey tonight and he left me this note. (Hands it to Rachel.)
Joey: (entering) Hey!
Joey: I dont know.
Joey: The RossIs that back?!! (Chandler motions no.)
JOEY: You know it's funny you should mention that 'cause I was thinkin'... what's with the boxes?
Joey: Hey.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment, Joey is trying to turn the sofabed back into a sofa. Someone knocks on the door and it rears up at him.]
Joey: (smiling) That sounds fair.
Monica: Joey, that papers like a year old!
Joey: Yknow what Ross? Im not gonna let you get away with this!
Joey: I'm sorry Pheebs, I just, y'know, I just wanted to do a good deed. Like-like you did with the babies.
Ross: Yeah, why would it be weird? Hey, Joey, can I get some coffee?
Joey: Well well see!
Joey: (entering wearing a Superman costume) Merry Christmas!
Phoebe: Well, I have plans with Joey tonight.
Joey: What?! Tonight?!
Joey: (entering) Hey!
Joey: (seeing what theyre doing) What do you got there?
Joey: Huh? Uh (He starts taking off his pants.)
Joey: She made me switch to light Mayo. Thats it! Thats all I got! And, you know what? It tastes the same and my pants fit better!
Chandler: Dude! Dude! (Motions that Joey should pull up his pants.)