words in movies
Joey: (enters) Guess what? (they all look expectantly at him) I finally got that seed out of my teeth.
Phoebe: I do, he's been working on that all day! (looking at Joey)
Joey: (enters) Hey guys.
Joey: No, thank you.
Joey: But no, it's not close. You said it was in escrow? I couldn't even find it on the map.
Monica: Joey, please come. It would mean so much to us.
Joey: You know what? You are my friends, I wanna be supportive, I will come with you. SHOTGUN!
Monica: (to Joey) I'll pick you up at eleven. So glad you're coming.
Joey: What? No, the only reason I'm going to their stupid new house, is so I can point out everything that's wrong with it, so they don't move. I'm gonna make them stay here.
Phoebe: Joey, you can't make someone do something they don't want to do. Believe me, there's something I've been trying to get Mike to do in bed and there's... he's just...
Joey: Hey, hey... I can convince people to do anything, you know. I bet I can even get Mike to do that "thing". What is it?
Joey: I AM NOT GONNA HELP YOU DO THAT! Goodbye! (he leaves)
Ross: Oh, I thought Joey was here. Five is good. (Gunther leaves, hurt) Well, I'm gonna have a loogie in my coffee tomorrow.
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's future house. They enter the living room with the realtor and Joey.]
Joey: Me too. Yeah, this place is great. I'm so happy for you guys. Although, you know, I hope you like fungus.
Joey: Fungus! Yeah. Place is full of it.
Joey: Okay. Then I guess I have dry eyes and a scratchy throat for no reason.
Joey: Maybe. So this is the living room huh? Ooh, it's pretty dark. (starts feeling around him like he's in a completely dark room, touching Chandler, who backs out and hits him)
Joey: (squinting his eyes) Are you kiddin'? I think I just saw a bat in the corner!
Joey: (glares at him for a moment, then admits grudgingly) Maybe. Well, I just think you guys can do better than this house, you know? Or any other house for that matter.
Monica: Oh Joey, look, we know you're having a hard time with this, but we really, we love it here.
Joey: FINE, ok, if you love this house so much, then you should just live here, okay? I just hope you get used to that weird humming sound. (He turns his back to them and starts humming) Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...
Monica: Joey, we know that's you.
Joey: no... hmmmmm... it's not... hmmmmmmmmmm
[Scene: Joey is in Monica and Chandler's future house, sitting in a child's bedroom, looking at a quiz card which has "5+10=" printed on one side.]
Joey: (turns the card around, obviously had the wrong answer) Ow!
Joey: Oh, hi, I'm Joey. My stupid friends are buying this house. Who are you?
Joey: (understanding) Oh.
Joey: I hate my friends. (They shake on it as if they just made a pact) Alright, look. There's gotta be a way that we can stop this from happening.
Joey: (thinking) Uhm... oh! Okay. You come with me, and you tell them that the house is haunted!
Joey: Woah, uh! Okay, let's hear your great idea.
Joey: (frustrated) Ahh! There's gotta be a way. I mean, you know, if Monica and Chandler move out here and now Phoebe is married to Mike. That just leaves me and Ross and Rach, you know what I mean?
Joey: What am I gonna do, I feel like I'm losing my friends.
Joey: Oh, yeah, sure, easy for you, you're young. Me, I'm set in my ways.
Mackenzie: This is what my mom was talking about. Whiners are wieners. (Joey glares at her angrily) Look, you want your friends to be happy, right?
Joey: Yeah, yeah, I guess.
Joey: (having difficulty admitting it) Yeah, maybe.
Joey: (In near tears, realizes she is right) I hate to admit it, but you're probably right. How did you get to be so smart?
Joey: (his mood changes instantly) Just when I thought we could be friends. (he leaves the room)
Joey: (entering) Hey!
Joey: Oh, just er... you know, looking around. But you know what? This house... is great.
Joey: Oh well, the little girl who lives here made me feel a lot better about the whole thing.
Chandler: Joey, there was a little girl who lived here, but she died like 30 years ago.
Joey: (frightened) What?
Joey: That's not funny! You know I'm afraid of little girl ghosts!
Monica: Joey, now that you're okay with the house, do you wanna go see your room?
Joey: What? I get my own room?
Chandler: You don't think we'd buy a house and not have a Joey room do you?
Joey: Oh my God! (they all hug) Oh! Hey, can I have an aquarium? And a sex swing?
Joey: Why not? I'll keep the tank clean.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's. Joey's on the phone.]
Joey: I mean, this soap opera is a great gig, but... am I missing opportunities? You know, I've always thought of myself as a serious actor. I mean, should I be trying to do more independent movies?
Joey: Hey bear, I need some career advice.
Joey: Yeah! Allright! Hey, hey Ross. Check it out! Sandy taught me Hot-cross Buns.
JOEY: No, not that one. We're trying to figure out who to bring to the Knicks game tonight, we have an extra ticket.
Joey: Listen, buddy, we're just looking out for you.
[Scene: Silvercup Studios, Joey is just arriving for his scene.]
(Long pause... Joey looks confused.)
Joey: (entering quietly) Hey.
Joey: Not following you.
Joey: What do you mean?
Joey: Then you do. Heh, heh.
Joey: Of course! Only an idiot would wear this stuff if you didnt have the car! Right?
Joey: (to Rachel): That book got me through some tough times.
Joey: No way! Mr.Salty is a sailor, all right, he's got to be, like, thetoughest snack there is.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is eyeing a beautiful woman at the counter, and Joey and Chandler are egging him on to go talk to her. No pun intended. I mean it.]
Joey: No, yeah, no, ok, but not yet. I don't wanna seem too eager. One Mississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi. That seems pretty cool. (he walks over to her) Hey, Angela.
Estelle: How do you do. (to Rachel and Monica) Ooh, you two girls were outstanding! (to Joey) Did they have representation?
Joey: He's right, cause if you're just gonna, like, break his heart, that's the kind of thing that can wait.
Joey: The country.
Joey: Well... I'm helping out down at the N.Y.U. Med School with some... research.
Joey: Okay, may I see the comics?
Joey: How do you mean?
Joey: Sure! Why not?
(Joey starts to kiss her.)
Joey and Chandler: Hey Phoebe!
Joey: Shhhh!
(Joey looks down at Lydia.)
Joey: Because its all tainted with your betrayal. From now on this apartment is empty for me! And Im not happy about you either. (The bread maker dings) Oh, and just so you know, I made that bread for you. (Joey walks into his bedroom and slams the door.)
Joey: Heh, heh. It was nothin'.
Joey: She's still asleep.
Ross: And-and I, and I saw that Joey was about to go in, so I ran in ahead of him to-to surprise him and, and then I pretended I didnt know he was in there. (They all kinda look at him.)
Joey: (panicked) Water breaking, what do you mean? What's that, water breaking?
Joey: (aside to Ross) So.... back to your place...you thinking, maybe... (gestures with hands, back and forth) huh-huh?
Joey: I know! Neither did I!
Joey: (staring at the ice sculpture) How bad do you want to stick your tongue on that? (They all glare at him)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler is playing foosball by himself, Joey enters]
Joey: Okay, so-so which route should I take the northern route or the southern route?
Joey: Seven hundred bucks!
[Scene: Estelle's memorial service. Joey is giving a speech. Next to him is a blown op photograph of Estelle behind her desk and there's a man standing next to him.]
Joey: Absolutely! And if it doesnt, can I get the extra ticket?
(Chandler looks at Joey in amazement)
Joey: No, no, no, don't you dare bail on me. The only reason she's goin' out with me is because I said I could bring a friend for her friend.
Joey: (takes her hand) Listen, I hope... that you know... (has difficulty saying it) I don't want you to see your father cry, GO TO YOUR ROOM!
Joey: Um, this?
Joey: What up?!
Joey: Thats it?! Even if nobody helps me I can eat that no problem. At least give me a challenge!
Joey: (returning from a deli) Okay, I got it! This place makes the best sandwich in the world!
Rachel: All right, fine. Um, you were not the only one there. (Camera fades to Ross, who's listening very carefully) Joey was there too.
Joey: Hey don't worry about that! I mean, Ross needs you! And Rachel and I will stay and help anyway we can.
Joey: (reaches for hi scones) My scones.
Joey: (to Chandler) You know, I think I was sixteen.
JOEY: Ok, uh, hey Richard, if you had an extra ticket to the Knicks game and you had to choose between a friend who smells and one who bruises you who would you pick?
Joey: Come on look guys, don't fight.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Joey and Chandler are giving out their Christmas presents out of a cardboard box from a case of motor oil.]
Rachel: Its a truffle. Its got all of these layers. First theres a layer of ladyfingers, then a layer of jam, then custard, which I made from scratch, [Joey and Ross make impressed faces] then raspberries, more ladyfingers, then beef sauteed with peas and onions, [Joey and Ross look like somethings wrong.] then a little more custard, and then bananas, and then I just put some whipped cream on top!
Joey: Can we see her?
Joey: You gotta tell Ross how you feel.
Chandler: Oh. (takes the cassette and puts it on his arm like the stop smoking patch, and it falls off.) Nope, that patch is no good. (Joey and Monica both do their fake laughs.)
JOEY: All right.� All right.� Then, maybe you won't mind if me and my friend take a look around, huh?� (He checks the bathroom shaking the bat.� Then he proceeds to their bedroom.)� Bwa-ah-ah!
Joey: (To Chandler) Hey man, you feeling any better? (Chandler answers him with some guttural sounds that only he can make and that no human can transcribe.)
Joey: Frankie? What're you talking about?
Joey: Man, hell of a two weeks, huh? Y'know what, though? I really feel like I learned something.
Joey: Needs some clothes altered?
JOEY: I don't know.
Joey: (joins him) I gotta get one, too.
Joey: Chandler?
Joey: Uh, does it hurt?
Joey: Monica just called from the cab. She said they should be here any minute. And apparently, there's some big surprise.
Joey: Who?
Joey: It smells really bad in here.
Joey: Services? (Ross looks at him) Oh, services.
Joey: Yeah. Bijan for men?
Joey: Hey, is this person who decides whether or not you... get a baby?
Hombre Man: (To Joey) You were saying?
Joey: Come on! Youre good with kids. Theyre just crazy on Halloween. Yknow, theyre all greedy and hopped up on sugar!
JOEY: I didn't get it.
Joey: Well, before, with the wishbone... I didn't wish we would win the lottery, I wished you'd get the job.
(Joeys shocked and everyone else looks at Rachel.)
Joey: Animals dressed as humans.
Joey: Oh no-no-no-no, she wants to talk to you!
Joey: Oh, yknow what? Since Im here, I think Im gonna have me a little beer on the port side. (Grabs and opens one.)
Joey: (realizes what he said) Street noise drowned any of that out? (Rachel moves madly towards him) No, all right, I see you later, okay... (Turns away embarrassed)
Joey: Exactly.
Joey: Yeah, it's kinda sweet, sorta like, uh...
Joey: No! No-no. Look, theres a bug stuck in tar right here. (Bends down to get a closer look.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, and Ross are sitting on the couch.]
Joey: Yeah I guess you're right.
(Hayley laughs and goes into the kitchen thinking it's a joke, Joey doesn't see what's so funny about it)
(Joey looks at his friends, thinks a bit more, then realises.)
Joey: Yeah, I'm ready.
JOEY: [Monica walks back in the kitchen] Ok ok ok ok. Monica, we'll bring him, but only if he takes the Jaguar.
Ross: You're just jealous because you couldn't pull this off. Yeah, now if you'll excuse me (getting up and taking his coat) I have a date. (As he is walking out, everyone turns and stares at him) See? (To Joey) ALL eyes on ME!
[Time lapse. Melanie, Joey's girlfriend, is there with Joey, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel. Ross is gone.]
Joey: What? That's not? (Realizes) Oh my God.
Joey: I dunno, I loved high school. Y'know? It was just four years of parties and dating and sex.
JOEY: Such as?
Joey: I dunno. Some fat guy's sleeping with the store manager. He's not even jolly, it's all political.
Chandler: No, no, I keep trying, yknow? I can get out, "Joey, I have too " but then I lose my nerve and I always finish with, " go to the bathroom." He may think Im sick.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is on the phone as Joey enters.]
Joey: Ive got cold feet.
Joey: I guess I didnt really think about it.
Joey: (panicked) Uhhh.. y'know what? Forget about me. Let's, uh... let's give you another turn.