words in movies
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Chandler is getting help writing his vows from Joey and Ross.]
Chandler: (writing) Monica, there are no words (To Joey and Ross) There are no words! This should not be this hard!
Joey: All right, uh (To Ross) Oh hey, youve done this before Ross, well what did you say when you made up your vows?
Joey: Oh, I got it! How about saying something like, "Monica
Joey: " when I look back over our time together "
Chandler: (writes what Joey said and waits for him to go on) Yeah?
Joey: Well, I cant do everything! Look back over your time together.
[Cut to Chandler opening the door to his and Joeys apartment to reveal Monica standing there with a turkey on her head in The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks.]
(Joey walks in and sees Monica. He freaks out and runs back into the hallway, screaming.)
(He turns to look at Joey who smiles slyly and closes the door leaving them alone.)
Joey: (yelling through the door) Can we come it yet?! Were dying out here!
Monica: Come in! Come in! (Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe burst through the door.) Were engaged!!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are on the couch as Joey and Ross enter.]
Joey: Hey!
Ross: Oh, we were helping Chandler write his vows, but he kicked us out because Joey kept making inappropriate suggestions.
Joey: How is "Monica, I love your sweet ass," inappropriate?
Joey: (shocked) Has it been that long?!
[Flashback to Joey interrupting a bath Monica and Chandler are sharing in The One With All The Kissing. Monica dives underwater as Joey opens the door.]
(They move into kiss but are interrupted by Joey knocking on the door.)
Joey: Hey, it's me! I'm comin' in!
(Monica quickly dives under the water as Joey enters. He looks a little shocked at what Chandler's doing.)
Joey: Ahh, I'm gonna go get some chicken. Want some?
Joey: Okay.
(Joey leaves and Monica comes up for air.)
(Monica goes back underwater as Joey re-enters.)
(Joey gives him a thumbs up and heads for the chicken.)
Joey: I know! I mean its not like we werent cool about it.
[This starts a series of flashbacks starting with Monica and Chandler forcing Joey to keep his new found knowledge of their secret relationship in Monicas bedroom in The One With All the Kips.]
Joey: (To Chandler) You?! (To Monica) And-and you?!
Joey: How?! When?!
Joey: IN LONDON!!!
Joey: But it is a big deal!! I have to tell someone!
(Joey thinks it over.)
Joey: All right! Man, this is unbelievable!
Rachel: Yes, I know! And Joey knows! But Ross doesn't know so you have to stop screaming!!
[Cut to later in that episode in Central Perk, a meeting with Phoebe, Rachel, and Joey where they discuss Chandler and Monica.]
Joey: Yes, but y'know what? It doesn't matter who knows what. Now, enough of us know that we can just tell them that we know! Then all the lying and the secrets would finally be over!
[Cut to later in that episode. Monica and Chandler are confronting Joey in his apartment about Phoebes knowledge.]
Joey: Well I didn't tell them!
Joey: Uhhh, Phoebe and Joey.
Monica: Joey!
Joey: And Rachel. I would've told you but they made me promise not to tell!
Rachel: I can not believe he would do that to MonWhoa! (She stops suddenly and slowly turns to point at Joey. Joey is avoiding her eyes.) Joey, do they know that we know?
Joey: No.
Rachel: Joey!
Joey: They know you know.
Phoebe: God, they thought they can mess with us! They're trying to mess with us?! They don't know that we know they know we know! (Joey just shakes his head.) Joey, you can't say anything!
Joey: I couldn't even if I wanted too.
Joey: (entering the hall) Oh man! Aren't you guys done yet?!
Rachel: Joey look, just look at it this way, the sooner Phoebe breaks Chandler the sooner this is all over and out in the open.
Joey: Ooh!
Joey: I like that! (To Phoebe) Oh, okay! Show him your bra! He's afraid of bras! Can't work 'em! (He swiftly rips open the front of Phoebe's dress revealing her bra.)
Phoebe: Joey! (Examining the dress.) Wow, you didnt rip off any buttons.
Joey: It's not my first time.
(Monica comes out of the bathroom like a bolt, and Rachel and Joey both enter.)
Joey: So that's it! It's over! Everybody knows!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Rachel, Joey and Ross are talking.]
Joey: I dont want them to move to a Volvo dealership!
Joey: Im sorry, I just I like things the way they are.
Joey: Ooh, look-look-look-look-look! I got Monica naked!
Joey: Hey.
Joey: Yeah, you can get a Volvo. If thats what you really want.
Joey: Hey!
Joey: (To Chandler) (laughing) Funny one! Thats good!
Joey: What? I dont get it.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Ross and Joey are reading Chandlers new vows.]
Joey: (starting to cry) I have never known love like this.
Joey: If he goes first he can!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Chandler, and Phoebe are there as Ross enters.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is opening the door, but Chandler has the chain on it.]
Monica: For this weekend! Oh gosh, it would be perfect, we get to see Joey plus we get to start our anniversary celebration on the plane. We can call it out plane-aversary.
CHANDLER AND JOEY: Hi. We're the guys who called about the baby. We left the baby on ths bus. Is he here? Is he here?
Joey: A dreamless sleep.
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's, Ross is there as Chandler enters.]
Ross: Thats right! He was hitting on her, and I got her. I guess the better man won. (To Joey) Please dont take her from me.
Joey: Oh, uh, again. Can I make a special request: Can you bring everything as soon as it�s ready? Appetizers, entrees, we don�t care.
Joey: Oh, it was a lot of fun right up until Chandler got a finger in the eye!
Joey: Well, I figured were in another country, so it doesnt count.
Joey: (slow on the uptake) Oh my God!
Joey: (raises his hand and points to himself again) Ken Adams!!
Monica: (answers the phone) Hello? (Listens.) (To Phoebe) It's Joey. (Phoebe's proud of herself.) (To Joey) I'm so glad you called! Chandler told me what happened. Y'know he's really upset about it.
Rachel: Hi Joey, how ya doin?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, Phoebe, and Monica are there.]
Joey: Never had that dream.
Joey: Ohh.
[Scene: The fire escape, Joey is now hanging off of the bottom rung of the ladder that wont move and Ross is watching from above.]
Joey: Oh uh, hey. Not as good as this guy! (Grabs Ross around the shoulders.) He brought Twizlers!
Phoebe: I do, he's been working on that all day! (looking at Joey)
Joey: This guy says hello, I wanna kill myself.
Joey: Strip joint! C'mon, you're single! Have some hormones!
Joey: Yeah, poor cat, never saw that big butt coming.
Joey: Who's Paul?
Joey: What, like there's a rule or something?
Joey: Hey, Paul!
Joey: Did you call the cops?
Joey: Hey Pheebs, you wanna help?
Joey: Well, the movie got shutdown because they ran out of money, so I'm working here 'til it starts up again, if it ever does.
Joey: Ross, let me ask you a question. She got the furniture, the stereo, the good TV- what did you get?
Joey: Ah, well, if I want the girl to kiss me, first thing I do is make my lips look irresistible.
Joey: Which goes where?
Phoebe, Ross, Chandler, and Joey: Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs!
Joey: I tried to call you from the coffee shop, and there was no answer.
Joey: You got screwed.
(Joey and Ross enter. Phoebe and Mike are sitting on the couch, reading a magazine.)
Joey: Shut up!
(Joey leaves. Rachel gulps down what's left of her drink and grimaces.)
Joey: All right! There is something. I kinda had a dream, (pause) but I don't want to talk about it. (Starts for his room.)
[Scene: The game show studio. Joey and Gene are sitting in the winner circle.]
Joey: Nothing major, it's just that, you know, they're not really good enough for you, and you deserve the best.
Joey: Morning, Paul.
Joey: Congratulations.
Joey: (quickly) I call Godfather!
Joey: Sure. Here. (He hands them over.) Ill uh, save your parking spot.
Joey: (through the window) All right, he likes you back! Huh? Told ya, you should go for it!
JOEY: Hey, you guys are still gonna come visit me, right?
Chandler: Joey, there was a little girl who lived here, but she died like 30 years ago.
Joey: (picking up a leftover part) What's this?
Joey: I can't believe what I'm hearing here.
Joey: Yeah, right!.......Y'serious?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Paul is writing something as Rachel enters.]
Joey: (pause)....Are we still talking about sex?
Rachel: Its a trifle. Its got all of these layers. First theres a layer of ladyfingers, then a layer of jam, then custard, which I made from scratch. [Joey and Ross make impressed faces] Then raspberries, more ladyfingers, then beef saut�ed with peas and onions, [Joey and Ross look like somethings wrong.] then a little more custard, and then bananas, and then I just put some whipped cream on top!
(Monica is cleaning the table, Chandler is sitting on the sofa. Joey enters.)
Chandler and Joey: Oh! Yeah!
Joey: I was with you the whole time we were in Connecticut, when did you even get those?
(Rachel rushes back and pulls Joey back onto the balcony, and takes him inside.)
Joey: Thata girl! Huh? We should get out of here; theres a new class comin in.
Monica: (yelling from the bedroom) Shut up, Joey!
Monica: Hey Joey, come taste this.
Joey: How's that different? (She looks at him until he gets it.) Oh! Yeah!
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel, Chandler, Monica, and Joey are there as Phoebe enters.]
Joey: Hey-hey dancer girl! Can I go to the bathroom? I just.. (The girl starts dancing really close to him, so he picks her up, twirls her round, and puts her against a platform) Here we go. (He walks away to find Monica and Ross doing a really out of place dance) Looking good Gellers!
(The duck starts to frantically flap his wings, while Joey is holding him, in an attempt to get away.)
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe and Joey are sitting on the couch. A waitress brings a coffee and Phoebe wants to pay.]
[Another group of flashbacks begin with Episode 513: The One With Joeys Bag. Joey is carrying the bag and has entered Central Perk to the amusement of Ross and Chandler.]
Joey: (entering carrying a box) Hey!!
Charlie: You know, actually I'm a little surprised to myself. I mean, Joey is so different from the guys I usually date. I mean, they're all professors, and intellectuals, and paleontologists mostly, you know, very cerebral...
Rachel: Amy! Hi! Oh-oh-hoh! (they hug) Wow! You remember Joey?
Joey: Come on, you guys are more then that! I mean, youre gonna get together right?
Joey: .....Well, this is still ruined, right?
Joey: I doubt it. Mostly regional work.
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe's trying to teach Joey French, so she's sitting in front of him with the script in her hands.]
Ross: (to Joey) So? What do you think? (Shows himself - Joey observes him with a strange look on his face.)
Joey: Hmm, soup. (Pause.) I mean, noodle soup. I mean soup!
Joey: You a little sad about that sweetheart?
Joey: What theyre not invited?! Oh no, thats terrible! Theyre gonna be crushed!
Joey: What are we supposed to be seeing here?
Joey: Alright, when'd'ya have it on last?
Chandler: Joey and I can finish up in the guest room.
Joey: Ah, our little ones are growing up fast, uh?
Joey: Yeah. Cushions the blow.
Joey: Whoah!
Joey: What?
Joey: Hey!
Joey: Thanks! Let's keep going.
(Joey lets his wrist go limp.)
Joey: Wouldn't you pay good money to see these identical hands showcased in some type of a uh, entertainment venue?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is reading on the couch while Joey, still suffering from his hernia, is returning with coffee for them both. After a series of grunts and groans he manages to painfully walk back from the counter, sit down, and slide Chandler his coffee.]
Joey: Y'miss it?
(Joey tries and visibly winces.)
Joey: That's ridiculous!
Joey: Um-hmm.
Joey: Y'okay, Phoebe?
JOEY: I don't know, I was kinda hopin' no one would ever find out.
Chandler: Leave me alone! For the love of God, leave me alone!!! (Joey hangs up.)
Joey: I just said that so you wouldn't let Ben do it! Look Ross, if anyone should step aside it should be Ben!
Joey: Oh well, the little girl who lives here made me feel a lot better about the whole thing.
Joey: All right, well maybe Im enjoying it a little bit. I mean Im getting pretty good at it.