words in movies
Joey: (entering with Monica) Hey, is, is, is Chandler here?
Monica: You guys, Joey just saw Janice kissing her ex-husband.
Ross: What? (to Joey) So what are you going to do? I mean how, how are you going to tell Chandler?
Joey: Well, I was thinking about that and I, I think the best way would be, to not.
Rachel: Joey, you cant keep this to yourself, if you know about this, you have to tell him.
Joey: Itll kill him. I mean itll, itll just kill him.
Joey: (looking out the window) Ewww! Ugly Naked Guy is using his new hammock. Its like a Play-Doo Fat Factory.
Joey: What did they do?
Joey: Hey-hey, Ross?
Joey: Ive got a science question.
Joey: If the Homo Sapiens, were in fact Homo-sapien, is that why there extinct?
Ross: Joey, Homo Sapiens are people.
Joey: Hey-hey, Im not judging.
[Scene: The street, Chandler and Joey are walking past a jewelery store.]
Joey: Id really prefer a mountain bike.
Joey: Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait, whoa. Do you ah, want to get her something speacial, get her flowers, get her candy, get her gum, girls love gum.
Joey: Oh, you want something serious. Y'know what you should do, you should get her one of those um, barium enemas. Those are dead serious.
Joey: (stopping him) No, no, you cant, you cant, okay, you cant, you cant buy her pearls, you just cant, you cant, you cant.
Joey: Oh God. Uh, okay, heres the thing, this is the thing, okay, the thing is...
Joey: Okay. I went down to the Mattress King showroom and, and I saw Janice, kissing her ex-husband.
Joey: They were in his office.
Joey: Im telling you man, I saw it.
Joey: Im not wrong! I wish I was. Im sorry. Bet that barium enema doesnt sound so bad now, huh?
Chandler: Joey told me, he saw you two kissing.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey are there.]
Rachel: Monica, number one, I dont think Ben understands the concept of bribery, and number two, I... (Joey starts laughing in the background) (to Joey) What?!
Joey: You said number two.
Joey: I know. (giggles harder)
Joey: Uh.
Joey: Ugly Naked Guy looks awfully still. (Phoebe runs to the window and gasps.)
Joey: Im tellin ya, he hasnt moved since this morning.
Joey: Well, there is one way. His windows open, I say, we poke him.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is throwing darts, as Joey enters.]
Joey: Hey! Y'know how we ah, save all those chopsticks for no reason we get when we get Chinese food?
Joey: Well, now we got a reason.
Joey: Well, were fashioning a very long poking device.
Joey: Hey uh, whats a matter?
Joey: Oh my God, is she going back to him?
Joey: What are you ah, what are you gonna do?
Joey: Well, it doesnt matter what I would do.
Joey: All right, youre probably not gonna want to hear this but ah, if it was me, and this is just me, (Chandler gets ready to throw another dart) I would ah, I would bow out.
Chandler: What? (turns around quickly still ready to throw the dart and Joey quickly ducks and hides behind the chair) What are you, what are you talking about?
Joey: They have a kid together, y'know. Theyre like, theyre like a family, and if, I dont know, theres chance they could make that work, I know I wouldnt want to be the guy who stood in the way of that. Are you okay? Do you wanna ah, come poke a nude guy?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey, Rachel, Monica, Phoebe, and Ross are holding the giant poking device.]
Joey: All right now remember, something this big and long is going to be difficult to manuver, fortunately I have a lot of experience in that area.
Joey: All right, ladies and gentlemen, lets poke. (they start to advance the giant poking device) Steady. Steady. Okay, a little higher. Careful of the angle. Okay, okay, were approaching the window (as he says this the camera cuts to their view of Ugly Naked Guy, so that we actually see him!) Thread the needle. Thread the needle.
Joey: Okay, retract the device, retract the device.
Joey: Hey, thats never gonna make it all the way over here, buddy!
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Look, I can sense when women are depressed and vulnerable. It's one of my gifts.
Joey: It does in mine!
Joey: Whew! Stood up to fast, got a little head rush.
[Joey walks back inside just as Rosss dance is finishing.]
Joey: Hey! What are you guys doing here? I thought youd be out partying with Gandel-worf.
Joey: Like the three musketeers, only with fruit.
Joey: Hey!!! Oww!! And Im bleeding.
Joey: Okay. Im Chandler (makes a growling/gurgling sound at the end and the girls laugh.)
Joey: Look, the point is, theres a lot of women out there you havent even had sex with yet!
Joey: (holding an empty tissue box) Wheres all the tissues?! (Throws the box down in disgust.)
Joey: Oh. (realises) Ohh. Ohh, youre out of your mind.
(Joey enters.)
Phoebe: Joey, you can't make someone do something they don't want to do. Believe me, there's something I've been trying to get Mike to do in bed and there's... he's just...
Joey: I know! I know! And Im going to talk to them about it. They mean so much to me. They Theyre like my family. If you guys are gonna be fighting all the time, I-I I dont think we can be together. It just, it just cant work. It cant. (Starts to break up) Im very upset.
Joey: All right. Chandler, you can either spin the wheel or pick a Google card.
Joey: Hey, listen you ah....
Joey: Ah, Kate?
Joey: ...feel like getting a cup of coffee?
The Director: (to Joey) Very nice. Very nice. (he walks away)
[Cut to Living Room, Rachel is sleeping on the couch, Ross is gone, the rest of them can finally emerge from their cell. They all wave good bye, and start to walk quietly out, as Monica goes and puts a blanket on Rachel. Joey starts walking all hunched over and bobbing his shoulders as he goes.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Joey are there.]
Joey: Oh, and Mississ-Pete is?
Joey: (yelling from bathroom) Hey, does somebody wanna hand me one of those tiles.
Joey: Yeah! Oh my God! (to Chandler) Is this what its like to be you?
Joey: You ah, you forgot your shoes.
Joey: Better?
Joey: I don't know. I mean I like her a lot, and she's really nice, but
Joey: Oh, forget about it. She rocks!
Joey: You guys have one of those signs that says: 'We don't swim in your toilet, so don't pee in our pool.', you know.
Joey: Hey, Kate!
Joey: Oh, hey! Joey Tribbiani.
Joey: Listen, I ah, went to that restaurant that you were talking about last week...
Joey: Yeah?
Joey: All right.
Monica, Ross, and Joey: (joining in) Home is Home Star stew.
Joey: (looks at her, shocked) What?!
[Cut to the tape Joey made in front of some famous place in London with a rather famous English-type person.]
Joey: Get out of here, really?!
Joey: Excellent! Lets play Bamboozled! Chandler, youll go first. What is the capital of Columbia?
Joey: Oh, it was great! I mean we walked all around the village. We went to this ice cream place, split a milkshake, 70/30 but still And guess what, Im thinking about taking her upstate to one of those bed and breakfasts.
Joey: Calm down, do you want this unit or not?
Joey: Come on baby, dont go. Please? What do you say?
Joey: Do you want me to want you to care?
Joey: What?
Joey: What?
(Suddenly Rachel clears her throat and the camera cuts to the rest of the gang staring at them. Needless to say Joey and Ross are shocked and slowly turn their heads to see the gang.)
Joey: Okay.
Joey: I dont know.
Joey: Yeah, Ross, way to ruin it. I was just going to get dressed.
Joey: How do you mean?
Joey: Yeah, Chandler finds me so intimdating that its better if were on the same team.
Joey: Yknow what you guys? Im uh, Im gonna go too. And uh, Im sorry about everything.
Joey: All right, okay, now, we just have to make sure she doesnt find out some other way. (spins the chair around so that Ross is facing him) Did you think about the trail?
Joey: (to Kate) Ah, are you okay?
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: (to Ross) Hey.
Joey: (to Monica) Hey.
Joey: Hey.
Joey: Something like that?
Joey: I don't wanna hear it! Now go to my room!
Joey: You should both know, that he's a dead man. Oh, Chandler? (Starts after Chandler.)
Joey: No-no, things ah, finally happened with Kate.
Phoebe: Hes just trying to show Joey how much he means to him.
Joey: Wow! Huh? (Picks up the phone) Mac Macaveli, Private Investigator!
Joey: Hey.
JOEY: Well I uh, got what I came for. [puts on moose hat] I'll uh, I'll see you guys.
Joey: Y'know, about what happened with us.
Joey: Nooo.
Joey: Hi, Lauren.
[Scene: Westminster Abbey, Joey and Chandler have successfully navigated the streets of London and are approaching the Abbey.]
Joey: Y'know, I'd walk back to London for another frosty one of those bad boys.
Joey: It's a rented tux. Okay. I'm not gonna go commando in another man's fatigues.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is talking on the phone.]
Joey: Mia Hamm?
Joey: Yes, now is when you swoop! You gotta make sure that when Paolo walks out of there, the first guy Rachel sees is you, She's gotta know that you're everything he's not! You're like, like the anti-Paolo!
[Scene: Joey and Janines apartment, Joey stares at a picture of a bay on the wall. Janine comes out of her room.]
Joey: Oh, no. Ah, I playing your husband, Victor. Im Joey Tribianni.
Hooker: Uh, no. But I could pretend to strip, but thats gonna cost extra. Okay, heres the extras, handcuffs, spanking (Chandler grunts for her not to continue and Joey pulls him back into the kitchen.)
Joey: Hey, how much cash do you got in your pocket right now?
Joey: Look, I don't have it all worked out yet, but it's gotta mean big money! Come on! Identical hands!
Joey: Ah. Yeah. Well look, the thing is its the same day as my nieces christening and I really want my parents to be there in time to see me. Cause my parts just in the beginning Im not even in the rest of the showWedding!
Joey: Well, we only had samboucha, so it is now.
(Joey leaves and Monica mouths to Chandler Oh my God!)
Joey: Look, I just need a wire something to jimmy it. Oh hey, one of you guys give me the underwire from your bra!
Joey: Its cute, huh?
[Cut to Joey entering wearing a preppy tennis outfit.]
Joey: Hey.
All: Good-bye! Good luck! (She opens the door to reveal Monica and Joey.)
Joey: Hows she doing?
Joey: Well yeah, dont-dont you think its a she?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Ross, Chandler, and Joey are entering.]
Joey: Thats not what I said. Okay, I just meant...
Joey: What?
Joey: Ohhh, here it comes.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is entering, and hes very dejected.]
Joey: Yeah, theres this superintendents dance, the Super Ball. I dont know, and he wants to impress Marge, this lady super that hes a crush on.
Joey: Do you think well get our three bucks back?
Joey: Oh, you bet I am!
Ross: Really? (Joey gives him a Like I would know look)