words in movies
Chandler: Okay, well Im gonna get Ross, get the cameras, and get them developed. (Joey laughs again.) 32 Joe. Youre 32! (Exits)
Ross: Oh-oh yeah, you-you came up to me and asked if I could do you a favor, and my Uncle Murray came up to you and handed you a check. And then you said, "Why do they call it a check? Why not a Yugoslavian?" (Chandler laughs.) Yeah, then you did that.
Joey: Yes, but in Drake Remorays body. (Ross laughs unbelievably.) Why is this so hard for you to get? I thought you were a scientist!
(Everyone laughs.)
(Monica laughs and snorts.)
Monica: (laughs) Well thats the best part. Umm, you guys get to decide!
Joey: Ah, yes, The Plan! (Laughs loudly again, but he sounds more like Santa Claus.)
Rachel: Yeah, I did, but y'know what? I am really, really trying to cut back, y'know? (Laughs) Good luck, Rach.
(Chandler laughs)
Rachel: (laughs) Oh, I'm sure gonna miss pretending to laugh at your weird jokes that I don't get.
(Everybody laughs.)
Rachel: Uh well, I guess Im not gonna miss the fact that youre never allowed to move the phone pen. (Laughs. Monica lags behind the laugh a little bit.)
[Joey just laughs as a third set of flashbacks featuring Chandlers mistakes starts. The first flashback is from The One With The Prom Video. It's Chandler telling Phoebe how much he hates the bracelet Joey bought him. They're both at Central Perk.]
Monica: Just go up to her and ask her out. (Chandler laughs) Oh, what's the worst thing that could happen?
Ross: No, but, it's, you know, it's just a funny image, you know, the two of you, in this restaurant, with... (laughs nervously)tzz-zzz, mmm.
Chandler: I was dangerously dehydrated during the first six months of our relationship. (Monica laughs.) Look, for me the rush is knowing that we are gonna be together for the rest of our lives.
Monica: I can't believe we are at a real college party! (Rachel laughs excitedly) I have to pee so bad!
(Joey and Chandler laughs)
(Phoebe, Joey and Ross laughs)
(Joey and Ross laughs)
(Phoebe, Joey and Ross laughs again)
(Rachel laughs.)
Rachel: (laughs) You know what?
(Joey and Ross laughs)
(Ross and Chandler laughs)
RACHEL: Oh well, well thank you.� (She laughs.� He stares for a moment.)� Okay, stop.� Stop looking at me like that.� The last time that happened, (points to Ross) that happened.� (points to Emma.)
(Hayley laughs and goes into the kitchen thinking it's a joke, Joey doesn't see what's so funny about it)
Earl: (To All) Did you hear that?! I dont need you guys to care about me! Because the universe cares! The whole universe! (Laughs as everyone ignores him.) (To Phoebe) I really wished theyd care just a little bit though.
Janice: Hi, Ross. Yes, it's me. How did you know? (she laughs obnoxiously)
Monica: Now you think I wouldn't enjoy that, because it is so fake, (Laughs) but I still do.
Chandler: Id like to toast, Ross and Emily. Of course, my big toast will be tomorrow at the wedding, so this is kind of my little toast or Melba toast, if you will. (No one in the room laughs. He starts to get flustered.) Okay. I known Ross for a long time. In fact, I knew him when he was going out with his first girlfriend. (Ross looks embarrassed.) And I thought things were going to work out for him..Until the day he over inflated her. (He laughs. Jack looks at Judy and no one in the room laughs.) Ohh, Dear God.. (A cellular phone rings.)
Rachel: (reading the note) "Pheebs, cant make it, got a date. Talk to you later. Big Daddy." (Laughs) Big Daddy?
[Everyone laughs]
Joey: I know, yeah. I feel like we're all growing up. Person named Wiener, God that kills me. (Laughs)
[Chandler, trying to make nice with Jack, laughs at his joke and points at Jack.]
JOEY: Good, otherwise my watch would fall off. [laughs hysterically]
Rachel: (laughs) Well, I mean, are you sure you want to go out with her? I mean that aint a pretty picture in the morning, yknow what I mean. That wig all in disarray, and boobs flung over the night stand, y'know.
(She laughs at the childhood memory. Phoebe smiles at being able to make her point.)
Richard: Oh, (laughs) that was the blind date that I told you about, she called and switched it to today.
Mona: Huh, could you imagine. I go away for a few days, and come back, and my boyfriend is living with some woman he got pregnant! (Mona laughs yes again!)
Ross: Okay. (He leans in to kiss her again, but she leans back preventing him from making contact.) Wow, its-its 5:30 in the morning. (Rachel laughs) So, Id better get cracking on this baby.
Rachel: (reading what he wrote again) "Dear Rach, youre a great person. Sorry about your tiney-wienie." (Will laughs.)
Ross: I like it. I do, I think it's a Ten. (Chandler laughs.)
Monica: I might've said that. (Chandler laughs.) Why is that funny?
Ross: Its a good thing I didnt do it, because it sounds like it wouldve been a very expensive wedding. (Rachel laughs) Okay, good night
Ross: (on the phone) Yes, hello. I have a question. Umm, I used your pen to draw on my friend's face. (Listens) A beard and a moustache. (Listens and laughs) Thank you. (Rachel turns around and glares at him.) No, she didn't think so. (Listens) I know it's like (turns and sees Rachel staring at him and quickly changes the subject) anyway, umm well make-up didn't cover it and we've tried everything to get it off and nothing's worked. What-what do we do? (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Uh-huh. (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Oh! Okay. (Listens) Okay, thank you! (Rachel gets excited at his tone.) (Hangs up the phone) Yeah, it's not coming off.
The Casting Director: Terrific! Well uh, theres one more thing. Uhh, uh its really important to the director that everything in this movie is authentic. Yeah and so in your love scene with Sarah she talks about how shes never seen a naked man who wasnt Jewish. So (Laughs.)
Phoebe: Oh well y'know. (laughs)
Phoebe: Okay, oh and you know, if she gets upset, just scratch her tummy and give her a liver snout. (laughs and hangs up the phone)
Monica: Oh. (she laughs)
Rachel: (laughs and pushes the chair back in) Yeah, well, y'know umm No honey, listen I think it's a great idea to become friends with someone before you date them, but I think the way you do it is y'know you meet someone, become their friend, build a foundation, then you ask them out on a date. Don't hit on your existing friends!
Chandler: Oh, shes got you running errands, yknow, picking up wedding dresses (Laughs and makes like Indiana Jones and his whip) Wah-pah!
Rachel: (laughs) You ah, you didnt say Yes to that did you?
Rachel: Oh! (laughs) Thats fine.
Chandler: (laughs) No. No!
The Salesman: (laughs) You need these books.
Mrs. Geller: (laughs) Im not freaking out.
Chandler: (laughs) Right in there!
Phoebe: (laughs) Okay, quit down. (they start to kiss again)
Kathy: (laughs) What about the duck?
Kathy: (laughs) Oh-oh-oh-oh!
Emily: (laughs) Well, I should hope not. Ross knows better than that by now.
[Scene: Rosss bedroom, Rachel getting into bed while Ross is reading and laughs.]
Monica: (laughs) Please, its a relief is what it is, is what it is.
Chandler: Gotcha! (laughs)
Chandler: Oh that's so cool! Why would a cop come in here though? They don't serve donuts. (No one laughs.) Y'know what actually, could you discover the badge again? I think I can come up with something better than that.
(Rachel laughs hysterically for no reason.)
(Chandler laughs without opening his mouth.)
Chandler: so then the farmer says, "Thats not a cow and youre not milking it." (Everyone laughs.)
Emily: (laughs) Ross play rugby? I dont think so.
Chandler: (laughs) No you cant.
Chandler: (laughs) Okay, we have to talk. Im just getting out of a very serious relationship
Ross: (laughs) Move in with me.
Rachel: Well, they never have any paper in there y'know. So my rule is no tissue, no tuschy. (Phoebe laughs and gets out.) Well, if everybodys going. (She gets out and starts to close the door.)
Rachel: (laughs) Yeah, okay, at ease solider!
Phoebe: (laughs and picks up another lure) And this?
Joey: Ross! (Laughs) Theyre gonna kill you!
(Rachel laughs hysterically.)
Joey: (Laughs) Of course we do! Mike is playing a game that we used to play in high school. Yeah, where we pretend we don't know each other. We played all kinds of games. (To Mike) Hey, remember the one where I punch you in the face for not being cool?!
Ross: Okay here, have one of these peppers. Oh ha Oh God! So so hot! (Rubs his eyes.) Oh my(Laughs.) By the way, you dont want to touch the pepper and then touch your eye.
Joey: (laughs) Actually, I didnt know the magazine was paying for it. Wouldnt have mattered, Im doing this for the fans, not for the free food.
Rachel: (laughs) Oh my God! Oh, thats funny, I cant believe I did that.
Phoebe: So you do know who he is! (laughs, Ross stares at her) Sorry.
Monica: (laughs) Okay.
Phoebe: (laughs) All I could think of was yknow, "Is he gonna kiss me? Is he gonna kiss me?"
Phoebe: (laughs) Thank you.
Monica: (laughs) Yes, I did! And you are welcome!
(She laughs and opens the door to reveal Rachel sitting on the bed.)
Joey: No! No. Umm, just myself and if they dont like me for(Laughs.) Im sorry I couldnt even get through that.
Ross: (laughs) That uh, that was pretty funny. Wasnt it?
Monica: (laughs) Thats okay.
Ross: I thought I heard voices! Hi Charlie! (Kisses her.) Hi Joey. (Hugs him.) And.. Oh! You're gonna have to introduce me to your new girlfriend. (Laughs.) I'm just kidding, I know Rachel, I know. (He squeezes her hand.) Come, please come in. Come in.
Chandler: Oh. (takes the cassette and puts it on his arm like the stop smoking patch, and it falls off.) Nope, that patch is no good. (Joey and Monica both do their fake laughs.)
(She laughs.)
Emily: Oh, Liam. (Ross laughs and takes her back.)
Rachel: (laughs) I'm sorry, that's not funny.
Frank: (laughs) Not to me.
Joey: (laughs, softly) Yeah, the stripper stole it.
Ross: (laughs as well, but for a different reason) Yeah, I didnt think of that.
(The woman who had tried to steal the washing machine walks by, and laughs.)
(Phoebe laughs.)
Phoebe: Okay. (She laughs harder.)