words in movies
(She lets her hair down and whips her hair around in Baywatch-esque slow motion with a Barry White song in the background. Chandler needless to say cant help but stare along with the rest of the male and lesbian population of North America.)
Male Jeweler: Okay, I can let it go at eight.
Male Guest: (to the Maitre d') Good evening. (Shakes his hand)
Ross: Look, I-I know how miserable you are, I wish there was something I can do. I mean I wish I were a seahorse. (She glares at him) Because with seahorses its the male, they carry the babies. And then also umm, Id be far away in the sea. (He sits back down.)
[Scene: At the tanning salon. Ross and a male assistant are walking through a hall]
Soothing male voice: ..a sound Mom and Dad never forget. For this after all, is the miracle of birth.
PHOEBE: OK. Ooh, OK, you gotta give me a second, I wanna get this just right. [she sticks out her gut, clears her throat and sniffs her nose and then in her best male voice. . .] Dude, 11 o'clock, totally hot babe checkin' you out. That was really good, I think I'm ready for my penis now.
Male Nurse: Rachel.
Chandler: You know what's not funny? Male Pattern Baldness (Monica stretches her neck to look behind Zack's head and then gives Chandler an "ok" sign)
Ross: It was no big deal. We-we said that the rumor was that umm you had both male and female reproductive parts.
Mrs. Bing: Oh, please, honey, listen, if I can do it, anybody can. You just start with half a dozen European cities, throw in thirty euphemisms for male genitalia, and bam! You have got yourself a book.
Rachel: They're male nurses.
Chandler: Really? Male nurses?
(A male nurse enters.)
Male Nurse: Hey!
The Presenter: in the category of Favorite Returning Male Character the nominees are: John Wheeler from General Hospital (Applause), Gavin Grant from The Young and the Restless (Applause), Dunkin Harrington from Passions (Applause), and Joey Tribbiani from Days of Our Lives (Applause). And the Soapie goes to (She opens the envelope) Gavin Grant from The Young and the Restless!
Ross: Uhm... Rachel and I hired a male nanny. (Joey makes a gesture and sound like "Can you believe that?")
Male Student: Sorry!
Male Jeweler: 8,600.
Male Jeweler: A tad.
Male Jeweler: Can I help you?
Chandler: So he has to be a male who has at least $50.
Male Jeweler: (to the female jeweler) Wheres the 1920s princess cut ring.
A Male Customer: Hey, thats weird, todays my birthday too!
[Scene: The Library, Ross enters and heads to the desk to talk to the male librarian on duty.]
Male Jeweler: (ignoring her) How would you like to pay?
Male Jeweler: (angrily) Are you interested in this ring?!
Ross: Did Rachel tell you we hired a male nanny?
Chandler: You know, I don't mind a... male nanny, but I do draw the line at a male wetnurse. (again they laugh, even more fake than before)
Roy, the male stripper: (coughs) Whoo, that's a lot of stairs!
Ross: Hey...! Rachel and I hired a male nanny.
Chandler: Well maybe you're going about this the wrong way. You know I mean think about it. Single white male, divorced three times,two illegitimate children. The personal ad writes itself....
Male Jeweler: Okay. (Holds out the ring, deadpan.) Will you marry me?
Male Jeweler: Uh yes, I have these two rather beautiful $5 bills. (Holds them up from his pocket.)
Phoebe: Okay umm, Id also like to try on the tiara. (The male jeweler hands it to her.) Oh yeah. Okay. (Puts it on.) (To the jeweler) What do you think, too much?
Monica: (entering from her bedroom) Okay, sperm donor number 03815, come on down! Okay, he's 6'2", 170 pounds, and he describes himself as a male Geena Davis.
Announcer: Presenting the award for Favorite Returning Male Character is McKensize
Roy: Well, look - it's not my fault if you're too uptight to appreciate the male form in all it's glory.
Male Jeweler: This ring is from the 1920s, its a one and a half carat diamond with sapphires on either side.