words in movies
Written by: Jeffrey Astrof, Mike Sikowitz, Adam Chase & Ira Ungerleider Transcribed by: Jim & Tracy Lambers With Minor Adjustments by: Dan Silverstein
Mike: Yeah, you do that, and I go check my dad for signs of internal bleeding. (Mike walks away and Bitsy walks in the same direction.)
Mike: I get the joke. Sophisticated as it was. Now the thing I wanna say is... maybe we should have talked about this before. Us living together, you're not expecting a proposal, right?
(They start to leave Central Perk. The band starts to play "Here, There and Everywhere" by the Beatles. The crowd rises from their seats. Phoebe and Chandler walk down the aisle. Phoebe really glows with happiness. So does Mike who watches her walk down the isle. When Phoebe and Chandler arrive, they kiss and Phoebe walks to her bridesmaids.)
Mike: So...? What do you think? (looks at his parents, which look in disgust)
Mike: Wow! You look like... like my mom.
Helena: Im sorry? (Holds out the mike.)
Mike: And that's how it's done! (Phoebe kisses him)
Mike: No, my parents are rich.
Mike: Mom, dad, this is Phoebe. Phoebe, these are my parents: Theodore and Bitsy.
Mike: My friend Manny. I asked him to keep me away from you.
Mike: Yeah, I'm sure they will, but you don't have to do this... I'm wanting them to get to know Phoebe, not (accent) Phoebe...
Mike: Hey... Wh... What are you doing?
[Cut to Central Perk, Phoebe at the mike.]
Phoebe: Oh please, these guys, we haven't even moved in yet and they have us picking out china patterns. (Mike seems to gag a little...and laughs nervously. They begin to leave. Phoebe bolts back)
Mike: Well, come on...
Mike: No, no, no, you're doing fine, really... Why don't you go talk to my dad?
Mike: But, I mean, you have met... humans before, right? Look, why don't you go talk to my mom?
Mike: Uhm... Did you just hit my dad?
(There's booing around them, and Mike sinks in his chair, holding his hand in above his eyes, hoping no-one would recognize him)
Mike: Look Phoebe, It's not about you. I just never wanna get married again.
Theodore: How could you know. Why wouldn't you punch me in the stomach? (Theodore walks out... Mike walks towards Phoebe)
Mike: A little better.
Mike: Awesome!
[Scene: Mike's parents house. Dining room again. Both Mike and Phoebe are not at the table, but the others still are.]
Mike: So what? I mean if even I can get past that, it shouldn't bother you. And you don't have to like her. You just have to accept the fact that I do. I mean, if you even can't be civil to the woman I love...
Mike: I'm not interested.
Mike: You do?
Phoebe: So Theodore... I uhm... I can see where Mike gets his good looks from...
Mike: Wanna get out of here?
Mike: Oh, I made a little something. If I had more time to work on it, it'd be better, but..
Mike: No, no Mike, just Crap Bag. First name Crap, last name Bag.
Mike: And there is Kevin.
Mike: No, no! What I mean is, I hate going back to my apartment now... and partly because I live above a known crack den but... mostly because when I'm there, It's just, I really miss you. So.. do you want to move in together?
Rachel: Shake it! (Phoebe, Mike, Chandler, Monica and Joey step in)
Mike: Phoebe, I love you. There's no-one else in the world I would ask to marry me... three times. But I wanna take care of you, have babies with you, and grow old with you... Phoebe Buffay, will you marry me?
Mike: All right, stop! You know, all Phoebe has done tonight is trying to get you to like her. And maybe that hasn't been clear all the time, but she did her best. And yeah... She's a little different than you are...
Joey: MIKE!!!
Mike: No! It's my fault. I keep trying to propose in these stupid ways and all I wanna do is tell you that I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.
Joey: Mike.
Phoebe: Mike? Okay! What's his last name?
Mike: Yeah?
Mike: No, I didn't.
Mike: I am Mike.
Joey: Which is why I waited until now to introduce you to Mike.
Mike: Well, I'm a lawyer.
Mike: Actually, I just gave up my practice.
Mike: What?!
Mike: That's great. What kind of music do you play?
Mike: It was nice meeting you!
Mike: (Joey holds up six fingers) Six!
Mike: Phoebe (comes in smiling then sees Phoebe crying) what's wrong?
Mike: Really?
(Phoebe and Mike look at him, and he goes over to the counter.)
Mike: There isn't a piano here.
Mike: Do you think that maybe, sometime, I could...
[Scene: Ross goes to see Mike to explain about Phoebe.]
Mike: Hey, so are you sure your ready to go.
Mike: what's up is Phoebe ok?
Mike: but you did say it
Mike: Vicrum?
(Monica opens the door and Mike is standing at the doorway)
Ross: (He knocks at the door, Mike opens it) Hey Mike sorry to just drop by like this, can I come in?
Mike: Oh.
[Scene: Phoebe is sitting with Mike, explaining about Vicrum.]
Mike: Sure (looks confused) who are you?
Mike: I just think there's somebody better out there for you, (pause) I mean I'm not saying me but. maybe me.
Mike: that's why she was weird.
Mike: what's wrong?
Ross: So, so, is Mike coming to dinner?
Mike: But Rachel I thought she just had a baby with Ross
Mike: Definitely
Mike: uh huh
Mike: its Mike Hanagen
Phoebe: Yeah, I kinda do. (Mike lets go of her hand) Well, how's this? (she takes Mike's hand and puts it on her breast, she tears open the sugar and puts it in her coffee. Mike thinks it over and nods appreciative. After that, they hold hands again. Joey now enters, and sees the two sitting on the couch, holding hands.)
Mike: You need both hands for that?
Phoebe: (returns) Okay, that was Mike.
Mike: Is it?
Phoebe: (impatient) I know Mike, why don't you keep digging?
Mike: Okay. Do you think maybe sometime I could take you out?
Mike: This is nice.
ROSS: Oh, it's fine.� Actually, I, I invited Mike over.
Mike: Is this cool, huh?
Mike: It's to my apartment.
Mike: So... how many guys have your key?
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. David is still there. Mike closes the door.]
Mike: Did you uhm...
Mike: ...kiss him?
RACHEL: Phoebe's Mike?
Phoebe: I'm... I'm just... I'm the worst person ever. How can I not tell David that I'm seeing Mike?
Mike: Don't point your finger at me.
Mike: Well, I might.
Mike: It's never gonna happen again right?
Mike: Hey, what are you kidding me?
Ross: well then I didn't need to bother you or the four other Mike Hanagens I bothered.
Phoebe: I'm sooo sorry!! I just... I keep thinking about Mike! I'm crazy about David, and we're having so much fun together. Why-Why do I miss Mike? That's-that's gonna go away, right?
(Phoebe and Mike enter.)
MIKE: Eh, why don't we start with the beer?
RACHEL: Okay.� You too.� And I hope you score.� (to Mike) Bye.
MIKE:� So, you're a paleontologist, right?
MIKE: Okay.� (pause)