words in movies
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler, Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe are standing around the table drinking champagne as Ross enters.]
Ross: I found a note on my door, "Come to Monicas quick, bring champagne and a Three Musketeers bar."
Chandler: Monica and I are engaged.
[Cut to Monica out on the balcony.]
Monica: (yelling at the top of her lungs) Im engaged!!!!!! Im engaged!!!!
[Cut to Monica.]
Monica: Im getting married!!!! Im gonna be a bride!!!! (Someone else yells at her.) No, I will not shut up because Im engaged! (He yells again.) Ohh, big talk! Huh, why dont you come over here and say that to me?! Huh, buddy?! Yeah, my fiancee will kick your ass! (Chandler starts to look worried.) Come on, apartment 20! Apartment 20!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, continued from earlier, everyone is now in the living room drinking champagne.]
Monica: Okay! Wait-wait-wait! Shhh! (Bangs on her class with a spoon to make a toast.) Okay, umm, I just wanna say that I love you guys so-so much and-and thank you for being here on my special night. (Chandler clears his throat.) Our special night. I mean it just wouldnt be myour-our night, if you all werent here to celebrate with meusDamnit!
Chandler: Its okay, I want this to be your night too. (Raises his class.) To Monica.
Monica: Awww, come onwaitstop it. Okay, to Monica.
Chandler: To Monica!
(They all say to Monica, clink their glasses, and drink.)
Rachel: (To Monica) Yeah, youre on your own.
Monica: Yknow what we should do? We should all get dressed up and go to have champagne at The Plaza.
Monica: Okay everybody, lets go! Lets go!
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers bedroom, theyre getting ready.]
Monica: (looking at her hand) Yknow what shoes would look great with this ring? Diamond shoes! (Sees Chandler sitting on the bed.) Youre not getting dressed. (Chandler quietly folds over the comforter on the bed making a spot for her.)
Monica: Yeah, but I dont think we have time.
Monica: (lustily) Lets do it! (She kisses him and they fall back onto the bed.)
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, time lapse, Chandler is fully dressed and slowly walking out of the bedroom with a distressed look on his face.]
Monica: (chasing after him) Chandler! It happens to lots of guys! You-you-you were probably tired, you had a lot of champagne, dont worry about it!
Monica: Phoebe!
Ross: Wow! Happy Monicas night!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is in the living room and Phoebe is in her room.]
Monica: Phoebe! Come on! Lets go! (Knocks on her door.) Come on! (Phoebe enters with guitar and not ready to go.) Why arent you dressed yet?!
Monica: (grabs the guitar away from her) No, Phoebe, Ill tell you what, if you get ready now Ill let you play it at the wedding.
Monica: Fair enough, now go get ready!
Monica: Ill get everybody else (Does so), finally we can start celebrating my(She gasps and is stopped by the sight of Ross and Rachel making out in the hall.) Im sorry, uh apparently Ive opened the door to the past.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, continued from before the commercial break. Monica is walking into the apartment followed by Ross and Rachel.]
Ross: Okay, Monica. Mon, uh what-what you just saw
Monica: (interrupting) Can I ask you just a little question, huh? Why tonight?
Monica: See, Ive been waiting my whole life to be engaged, and unlike some people Im only planning on doing this once. So, uh yknow, maybe this is selfish and Im sorry about it, but I was kinda hoping tonight could just be about that.
Monica: No its not! No! No! Now its about you and Ross getting back together!
Monica: See yeah umm, you kinda stole my thunder!
Monica: Thats true.
Monica: Thunder being stolen!!
Rachel: Okay come on Phoebe, its nothing! Monica, come on!
Ross: And; people thinking its huge has led Monica to believe that we are stealing her thunder. (To Monica) Which we are not!
Monica: Well, were still talking about it, arent we?
Monica: Yes that would be lovely.
Monica: Yknow what? I-I think that umm, I dont feel like going to The Plaza.
Rachel: Honey, Monica, this is ridiculous! Look
Monica: No-no, I-I really dont want to talk about it! I dont! (To Rachel) Especially with you. (Goes into her room.)
Phoebe: Well, I dont think Monica is gonna take this away.
Rachel: What do you think Monica mean when she said she didnt want to talk, especially with me? I mean, why not especially you and me? We were both out there kissing.
Rachel: Come on! Serious-ser-ser-seriously, what did she mean by that? (Mimicking Monica.) Especially you!
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers bedroom, they are both getting undressed.]
Monica: I cant believe her, yknow its justits so typical.
Chandler: Now Monica, I know youre upset, but dont forget. There is going to be a wedding, you are going to throw the bouquet, and then theres going to be a honeymoon, maybe in Paris.
Monica: Paris?
Monica: Keep talking.
Monica: I love you!
Monica: (in a French accent) Bonjour, monsieur.
Monica: (opening the door) Hi Pheebs, whats up? (She enters.)
Monica: What?!
[Cut back to Monica and Chandlers room, they are making out again as theres another knock on the door.]
(Monica opens the door to Ross and Rachel.)
Monica: Yes.
Rachel: Monica, what did you mean before when you said you didnt want to talk to anyone, especially me?
Chandler: What a great apology! (To Monica) And you accept! Okay, bye-bye!
Monica: Well, lets just say its not the first time youve stolen my thunder.
(Rachel ignores him and follows Monica into the kitchen.)
Rachel: Monica, what are you talking about?
Monica: My Sweet Sixteen! Remember, you went to third base with my cousin Charlie.
Monica: Its all everybody at the party could talk about!
Rachel: Monica, yknow what? The only reason I did that was because your party was so boring!
Monica: (gasps) We had a characturist!
Rachel: Monica, your Sweet Sixteen was like a million years ago.
Monica: And yet, here we are doing it again.
Rachel: Ugh, Monica I dont want to steal your stupid thunder!
Monica: Oh please! Why else would you have made out with Ross?!
Monica: I just thought it would be nice if I could have just this one night!
Monica: Oh, is that why you did it the secret hallway where nobody ever goes?!
Rachel: (ignoring them) Monica, why? Why would I ever want to take away from your night?
Monica: I dont know! I dontmaybe youre feeling a little resentful. Maybe ah, maybe you thought youd get married first! Maybe you cant stand the fact that your formally fat friend is getting married before you!
Monica: (yelling after them) I cant believe youre gonna have sex on my engagement night!!
Chandler: Well, somebody should. (Monica glares at him.)
Monica: (outside the door) Its Monica, open up!
Rachel: Yeah, you like that baby? (Monica bursts in followed by Chandler.) May we help you?
Monica: I just wanted to say that I hope you do have sex tonight and I hope that you guys get back together, but I must warn you, the night that you announce your engagement Im going to announce that Im pregnant!
Rachel: All right Monica, do you want to know why I was with Ross tonight?!
Monica: I know why!
Monica: Okay! Why?!
Monica: What do you mean?
Monica: (starting to cry) Im sorry I almost made you sleep with Ross. (They hug.)
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Phoebe is singing outside Monica and Chandlers door.]
MONICA: Hi. Uh, we'll be right there, we're just trying to decide something. [shuts the bathroom door]
Monica: What?! (She accidentally starts the blender without the lid on it and fruit flies everywhere.)
Monica: Well, if you hadn't meddled to start with, I wouldn't have had to go in there and meddle myself. Now, no matter how much we meddle, we will never be able to un-meddle the thing that you meddled up - in the first place!
Monica: (shaking the dice) A new pair of shoes for the Chan-Chan man! (Rolls the dice.) Yes!
Monica: Why? It's just that I've waited seven years for an opportunity like this, and you can't even wait four and a half minutes for a stupid onion tartlet?
Monica: They could be our neighbors, what are they like?
[Scene: The moment we waited for has finally arrived. Its time for Monica and Chandlers wedding. Weve got violins playing Every Breath You Take, weve got guests seated, and Chandler starts walking down the aisle with his parents on either arm.]
[Scene: Mattress King, Monica and Phoebe are shopping for a new mattress.]
Matt: And then sometimes during the show yknow but youre like, the scenes going one way but youre just tempted to say something another time. Like, do you remember that one where Monicas baking cookies in our old apartment?
(Monica rolls, and Ross goes first.)
Monica: Went down to the docks. Bet ya didn't know you could get it wholesale.
Monica: Yknow, you called me that before so I-I took the liberty of fashioning a star out of aluminum foil. Now, no pressure, you like my cookies, you give me the star. (Hands it to her.)
MONICA: I can't believe you married Duncan. I mean how could you not tell me? We lived together, we told each other everything.
MONICA: Hi sweetie, look before I forget, did I leave my diaphram at your place? Hi mom. [she starts throwing oranges at Ross who's looking pleased with himself]
Monica: Well I guess there is no harm in telling you now, Rachel and Ross are gonna have a baby.
Monica: Hey Phoebe... how you doin'? You feelin' better?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is packing her belongings to move to Rosss. Shes standing in the kitchen.]
ROSS: Wow, well uh, uh, actually, Julie's downstairs getting a cab, I just need the cat toy, did Monica say. . . What? Why, why are you looking at me like that? RACH: I don't know, I, I feel like I had a dream about you last night but I, I don't remember. ROSS: OK. Oh, oh, oh. [runs over and picks up the cat toy] RACH: Did we speak on the phone last night? Did you call me? ROSS: No, I stayed at Julie's last night. RACH: Huh. ROSS: Oh, actually I haven't even been home yet. Do you mind if I check my messages? RACH: Oh yeah, go ahead. [Rachel walks in her room. Ross picks up the phone and dials his machine to check his messages.] ROSS: Rach, I got a message from you. [pauses] Who's Michael? [Rachel comes out of her room, suddenly she remembers leaving the message.]
Mike: Hi David. Chandler. Monica... (Looks at Monica, checking her big hair, aghast) Oh!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica is entering to find Chandler playing Ms. Pac-Man.]
Monica: There were only twelve.
Monica: But I insist!
(He leaves. Cut to Monica entering Chandler and Joey's apartment. She sneaks up to the shower door)
Monica: Oh, this terrible! Everything is destroyed! Look at this. (She picks up some kind of furry thing.) It obviously meant enough for me to save it, and I dont even know what it is! Ohh, its still soft. (She rubs it against her cheek.) What do you think this is?
Monica: All right, yknow what? We really are late! Lets go! Lets go! Lets go!!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross, Monica, and Joey are playing Monopoly.]
Monica: This baby has got everything. Take yknow, locations for instance. (She opens up the binder to the locations chapter.) First, organized alphabetically, then geographically, then by square footage.
Monica: Well, when you first met Barry, you flitted off to Vail.
Fat Monica: dammit! (Runs off.)
Monica: Okay, so I'm responsible, I'm organised. But hey, I can be a kook.
Monica: Boy, I know they say you can't change your parents,... boy, if you could- (To Ross) -I'd want yours.
Monica: Chandler, we cant let this tape wreck Valentines Day!
Monica: Make it fifty!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is letting everyone in on the new developments.]
Monica: All right, all right! Lets just cut to the chase, okay? (To Phoebe) Youre single. (To Tim) Youre single. (To Phoebe) He gets off work at eleven. (To Tim) Shell be waiting for your call. (To Phoebe) Ill give him your number if I can get one calamari and one Caesar salad!! (Everyone in the kitchen stops.) I did not yell. I am not putting a dollar in the jar.
Phoebe: (Grabs the pictures) Oh! Here we all are! Yeah, there's Ross and Joey and you and me. (She picks up a magic marker and draws herself in. Monica can't watch.)
Janice: All right, I got to run. Tell Monica I say goodbye. And... I'll see you later, neighbor. (Janice laugh)
Monica: Then youd be going back and forth all the time, I mean it doesnt make any sense.
Monica: I am not 'so'! OK, I was a teensy bit weird at first, but... I'll be good. I promise.
Monica: And, and, and they wear those little water wings, you know. And they're, they're running around on the deck. Then Hoyt wraps this big towel around all three of them.
Monica: No! No! No! No sweetie! No! Not like that! Were not at a barn dance. Youve gottayou wanna fold them like swans. Like I showed you at Christmas time, remember?
Monica: The truth is, Dad, were-were trying.
Monica: Well, that's it. Everything's packed.
Phoebe: Oh Chandler! Thank God you're alive. Monica, can I talk to you outside for a minute?
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, continued from earlier.]
Monica: And it could be soon. I mean, think about it: right now, somewhere out there (they go look through the window) our baby could be being conceived.
[Scene: The casino bar, Phoebe and Monica are sitting at the bar, while Wayne Newton's signature song Danke Schoen is playing in the background.]
Monica: Oh my God, oh my God, that letter is gonna go in our file! We're never gonna get a kid. No, we're gonna be one of those old couples that collects orchids or has a lot of birds!
Monica: Jellyfish sting! Oh, it hurts! It hurts!! It hurts!!
Monica: It was so wild! We told em we were the Gundersons in 16
Monica: Rach, that's great! It's so good that you had a good time in Greece!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is taking out the garbage as Phoebe and Joey enter. Phoebe gasps.]
Monica: Unless... Maybe we do it here. I mean, how much can she even be aware of at this age?
(Monica goes over and grabs the pesto.)
Monica: You gotta go home and get the earrings that you borrowed from me okay? Chandler wants me to wear them tonight.
Monica: You bet your ass Im gonna fire you! Get out of my kitchen! Get out!! (Joey leaves) All right! Anybody else got a problem? How bout you Chuckles? You think this is funny now?
Chandler: Hang up, hang up. And that was a great movie! (Monica hangs up) I'm so gonna get back at Ross... oh yeah, this will show him, here we go (starts typing something).
Monica: Ohhh, ooohhh... you are on a roll, mister!
Rachel: Monica! Look! Hi! What do ya think? (shows her, her ring)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ben is playing in his crib while Chandler and Ross are leaning against the rim and are completely asleep.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is entering, dragging Chandler, to mediate the argument between Chandler and Monica.]
Monica: (Rolling her eyes) Nothing. It's fine.
Monica: You would not believe my day! I had to work two shifts, and then to top it off, I lost one of my fake boobs, (opens her coat revealing a large burn mark over her left breast.) in a grill fire.
(Phoebe goes and lies down as Rachel opens the drawer Monica hid the candlesticks in and as Monica walks out of her room.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Ross. Joey, and Rachel are eating breakfast. Chandler is holding a bottle of Herseys Syrup.]
Monica: Relax. Y'know, she may not even know.
MONICA: I can't believe you thought I was cheating.� (pointing at Joey) You own me an apology.
Monica: So look umm, while were st-still in London, I mean, we can keep doing it right?
Monica: As a joke, this customer at work who has a crush on me gave me a $20,000 tip. His number is on the check, he just did so Id call him.
[Scene: Monica's apartment. Monica and Erica have just arrived.]
Monica: Naaaa... He still kills me. Last night he had me laughing so hard, I swear... a little pee came out.
Monica: These tiny, little non-breasts?! Please, its gotta be Rachel.
Joey: Whoa, whoa, whoa, Monica, what're you doin'? This is a poker game. You can't serve food with more than one syllable. It's gotta be like chips, or dip, or pretz...(look of realization)
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Rachel is flipping through magazines. Handyman is installing things. Monica enters.]
MONICA: Okay, so, uh, we're in France, we're making the toast. Do you see a little bassinet in the corner?
Monica: If you have the big apartment you have to deal with people coming over all the time. That fridge has got to be stocked, okay, thats your department now. (She takes back the turkey leg)
Monica: Shes a stripper.
Joey: Well, everyone will enjoy my music as well. (Does a chord and Monica starts taking pictures of him and Phoebe. They both start to strike a pose with the excessive amount of pictures that Monica takes.)
Monica: No sweetie, youve got to win over the guy that controls C.H.E.E.S.E.! Youve got to kiss some serious robot ass!
Monica: Stop it Chandler. (Chandler is relieved) Im sorry too.
MRS. GREENE: Alright, Monica dear, I'm gonna hit the road. Now I've left my 10 verbs on the table. And you be sure and send me that finished poem.
Monica: No kidding, out of towners huh? What did you tell em?
Monica: Come on Chandler, come on! Itll give us great practice for when(realizes what shes about to say and changes)people with babies come to visit.
Chandler: And that would have made the official party line. (Joey nods) Monica and I are having a little financial trouble.
Monica: Let's see. Congress is debating a new deficit reduction bill... the mayor wants to raise subway fares again... the high today was forty-five... and- oh, teams played sports.
Monica: She's only a couple of months pregnant. She liked our application but who knows if she's gonna like us.
Monica: Besides, if anybody's gonna get free stuff, it's gonna be me.
Monica: No! Wait! If anybody gets to go.. it's us (Points at herself and Chandler) We've been complaining the longest!
Monica: Dad, please dont pick your teeth out here! Alright, and if youre gonna put your feet up, why dont you sit on the-
[Scene: Downstairs at Danny's party, Monica and Rachel are coming down the stairs and Rachel has on a coat to make it look as if she's just getting back. But just as they reach the landing they see Danny out in the hall talking to a guest, Rachel then quickly pulls Monica back up the stairs.]
Joey: Look, Chandler I dont think us getting our asses kicked is a solution. Okay? Just go and find Monica!
Chandler: What's with the word y'all? You know, just... two words just... pushed together... Are we all allowed to do that, because if so, I say why stop there? You know, your new poodle could be your noodle. And fried chicken? Could be fricken.Waiter, waiter excuse me, I'll have the fricken? (Monica laughs) See, that's... that's funny with the fricken, right?
Monica: Oh, he just doesn't want us to go through any trouble. Think of how excited he'll be when we go out and surprise him! Plus we get to have our own, ani-Vegas-ary! A-Nevadaversary!
Monica: Freemont. West-Westmont, ah Westburg?
Chandler: Actuary... no. Book-keeper... no. Topless dancer... (he looks down on himself, checking, then nods satisfied and marks the offer with a pen) (to Monica:) Hey, d'you know what I just realized? You are the sole wage earner. *You* are the head of the household. I don't do anything - I'm a kept man!
Monica: Phoebe, your face is fine! Come on, none of this stuff is going to happen to you! Stop being such a baby!
MONICA: Yeah, ours pretty much sucked, oh, but, I did run into little Stevie Fisher. Remember him?
[Scene: A hospital hallway, Chandler is sitting on a gurney with his hands spread out behind his back. Then Monica comes and plops down on the gurney and one of his hands. Chandler immediately recoils in extreme pain.]
Monica: Because! Shes my cousin. I mean, we grew up together! Were family yknow? Well thats important to me.
Monica: Oh, I can't wait for everyone at work to see these... (plays with her hair to make the shells tingle again) Ow!