words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are hosting a New Year's party. So the place is crowded and in a shameless promotion for NBC they're watching Jay Leno's coverage of New Year's from Time Square.]
Chandler: (deadpan, standing next to Monica) We're very happy for you.
Monica: Oh no, wait! Joey!
(And with that everyone starts playing tonsil hockey. Chandler with Monica, Ross with Phoebe, and Joey with Rachel.)
Chandler: (To Monica) Happy New Year!
Monica: Happy New Year.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, after the party. Everyone has left, except for the gang.]
Monica: She has a better chance of sprouting wings and flying up your nose than you do of not making fun of us.
Monica: Hey Rach, maybe your resolution should be to umm, gossip less.
Monica: Well if Ted Kopel talked about his coworkers botched boob jobs, I would.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering with Rachel.]
Monica: Hi Ben!
Ben: Auntie Monica!! (He runs to hug her.)
Monica: I like 'em.
Monica: I like them a lot.
Rachel: Awful, absolutely awful. (Plus other negative comments from Phoebe and Monica.)
(Monica starts taking pictures of Ross and Ben, with the flash.)
Monica: It's my New Year's resolution!
Monica: No! To take more pictures of all of us together. I mean I really think it's the best resolution because everyone will enjoy the pictures.
Joey: Well, everyone will enjoy my music as well. (Does a chord and Monica starts taking pictures of him and Phoebe. They both start to strike a pose with the excessive amount of pictures that Monica takes.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is drilling Joey on the chords as Monica looks on.]
Joey: No, I'm not questioning it, I'm saying it's stupid! (Notices Monica standing between them and smiling.) What?! (The camera clicks, taking another picture.)
Monica: Thank you. (Leaves.)
(Rachel looks shocked, gets over it, notices she's alone, and picks up the phone. The last part of which is something she shouldn't have done, because the phone is already in use. By Monica, and now Rachel can hear every word.)
Monica: (on phone) I can't wait to be with you! I'll sneak over as soon as Ross picks up Ben. I'll just tell Rachel I'm gonna be doing laundry for a couple of hours.
Monica: (on phone) Awww, y'know what your nickname is, Mr. Big
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is returning from his horrible trek back home without pants on. The whole gang is there.]
Monica: We heard about your pants, I'm so sorry.
Monica: Hey, hey, look. Look Ross, Ben drew a picture of you! (Shows him Ben's picture.) Huh? You're-you're a cowboy!
Monica: See? Ben doesn't think you're a loser, he thinks you're a cowboy! Now that's something.
Monica: Okay, now that everything's wrapped up here, I think I'm, I'm gonna go do my laundry.
Rachel: Chandler and Monica?!! Oh, this is unbelievable!! How long have you known?
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Ross, and Monica are there.]
Monica: Ah no, the other Phoebe, the one you went to go see.
Monica: Well, why would she lie to you?
Monica: Oh well, where is he?!
Monica: Yeah. (to Chandler) I bet you cant guess what color my tonsils are? Ill bet the apartment!
Monica: You guys! Do you realize that any minute now, Phoebe can be pregnant?
Monica: Strip Happy Days Game?
Monica: You made a joke right? So I laughed.
[Scene: The Moondance Diner, Pete is talking to Monica about the restaurant.]
Rachel: Monica, please?
Monica: Hes totally flirting with you too.
Monica: Why would the little girl creep you out?
Monica: Huh?
Monica: What?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is entering again.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang is returning from Petes.]
Monica: Windows are clean, candels are lit. Uh, belt's to tight, gotta change the belt. Did I turn the fish? (goes over to the kitchen to check on the dinner) No, cause I made lasagne. (to Rachel) Am I out of control?
MONICA: You know what, maybe I don't need to have children. You know maybe I just think I do because that is what society, and by that I mean my mom, has always convinced me that I...(sees two little girls dancing together) I do, I have to have children, I'm sorry, I just do.
Rachel and Monica: Ohh! (both grab there stomachs in pain)
(He goes over and gives Rachel the same treatment he gave Monica, only Rachel is shocked.)
Monica: And what are you laughing at, Miss `My-keg-sucking-boyfriend-is-stealing-from-me!'
Monica: You know, on the way over here, I saw this drunk guy throw up. And then a pigeon ate it!
Rachel and Monica: Uff.
Monica: Thats that weird voice again.
Monica: Yeah, but if it's good news, you should tell him now.
[cut to Monica opening the door of the beach house, with Chandler trying to pick her up for a date.]
[Scene: Central Perk. Everybody's sitting on the couch and Monica is eating a chunk of cake.]
Monica: Whats fish hooking?
Monica: Close? She's got her tongue in his ear.
Monica: Okay, Ive got a question. If you had to pick one of us to date, who would it be?
[Monica is visibly upset]
Monica: Really?!
Monica: Oh.
[Next is a shot of them dragging an enormous plant into the room, then Monica knitting a sweater, then Phoebe singing, then Phoebe shaving him and chatting to Monica]
Monica: Look, when it started I was just trying to be nice to her because she was my brother's girlfriend. And then, one thing led to another and, before I knew it, we were...shopping.
Monica: �A qui�n pidio el pollo General Tso? (Who ordered General Sal's chicken?)
Monica: (crying) So, I went down to the post office, and it turns out it was those videos that I ordered for Richard about the Civil War. He loved the Civil War.
Monica: Ohh Oh, thats okay I hate when people come back to complement the chef. Like I have nothing better to do! So whats up?
Monica: But you should eat them now because theyre hot from the oven.
Monica: (gasps) Totally familiar. (Phoebe shows the rest of them.)
Monica: Im getting married!!!! Im gonna be a bride!!!! (Someone else yells at her.) No, I will not shut up because Im engaged! (He yells again.) Ohh, big talk! Huh, why dont you come over here and say that to me?! Huh, buddy?! Yeah, my fiancee will kick your ass! (Chandler starts to look worried.) Come on, apartment 20! Apartment 20!
(Phoebe and Monica walk in from getting some coffee.)
Monica: Rach, did you check the machine?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Chandler and Joey are there looking at pictures from the trip to London.]
Monica: Ennnh.
Monica: (screaming in pain) Ow!! Ow!!!
Monica: What?!! Gross!!
Monica: What?! What is it?!
Phoebe: Yeah thats right Chandler does still think Im pregnant. He hasnt asked me how Im feeling or offered to carry my bags. Boy, I feel bad for the woman who ends up with him. (Monica looks at her.) After you of course.
Monica: Nothing, I dont know.
Monica: Oh, thats okay. By the way, I was just checking the shower massager.
Monica: You didnt even take off your pants.
Monica: (to Phoebe) Here you go. You can wear this. (hands her a sweater)
(Monica screams, throws the mouse down, and rubs her hands on Rosss sweater to clean them.)
Emily: Monica, why have you brought me here of all places?!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is reading The Shining, as Monica enters.]
Rachel: Ohh, its gonna be so great! Im gonna get to help decide what we sell, Im gonna have an office with walls and everything. (turns to Monica) Im gonna have walls!
Chandler, Monica, and Joey: NO!!!
Monica: Pass the cheese, please.
Monica: It's this dumb thing that Ross made up `cause he was trying to fool our parents. It's a way of giving the finger, without actually having to give it. I remember I cried the night you made it up, `cause it was the first time that I realized that I was actually cooler than my older brother.
MONICA: Tonight you're supposed to waitress for me, my catering thing, any of those words trigger anything for you?
[Scene: Joey’s apartment. Everybody except Monica and Chandler is there.]
Monica: (puts down the lasagne) I just... can't do it.
Monica: I was in too much pain.
Monica: Same category?
Monica: Promise me youll be careful.
Phoebe: Yeah! Sure! Ooh, I left my purse up at Monicas. Ill be right back. (She goes to get it.)
Monica: Please, could you just try it for me? Come on, I used all my best stuff! I-I-I lit some candles. I put on some music. I used bath salts, plus bubble bath! And got you this little plastic Navy ship. So its a boy bath!
Monica: Look, guys, you can't do this, it's just going to make getting over each other, that much harder.
Monica: Chasing him all around the room?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is watching TV, but turns it off, and Rachel is sleeping on the couch. Ross puts a blanket over her.]
Monica: Like a log.
MONICA: Really? I'm perfectly comfortable. [one of the guest opens the refrigerator] Hey, hey, hey, get in line buddy, I was next. [she opens the refrigerator and leans into it]
MONICA: So what, he's a little older, big deal, I mean he's important to me. Ya know if you ask him, he might take you on his Jag. [walks off]
Monica: You bet.
Monica: Dad, Chandler was just laughing at your joke.
[Scene: The Ultimate Fighting Championship, Ross and Monica are there watching Pete.]
[Flashback to Monica and Chandlers apartment. Chandler has a bunch of people over in formal wear to give Monica a surprise birthday party. Joey is coming out of the bathroom and removing his tie.]
Monica: Hey!!
Monica: Will you stop!
Monica: I cant believe this is taking so long. How are you doing?
MONICA: Hey, have you guys eaten, because uh, Richard and I just finished and we've got leftovers... Chicken and potatoes... What am I wearing?...Actually, nothing but rubber gloves.
Monica: Shhh!
Monica: Yesss!!
Monica: Aww, man!
Rachel: So, come on, what was the big news Pete wanted to tell you Mon?! Or should I say Mrs. Monica Becker?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Joey are there.]
Chandler: Hey Rach! Ah........ Perfection. (kisses monica) Wouldn't change a thing. Not a thing.
Monica: Hey. Okay, I gave him another chance, but Tim has got to go!
Monica: Oh, no. He doesn't have time for that. But if you want, you can go help him and Joey pack up the guest room.
Monica: We're moving in a couple of days and we've got a lot of packing to do. It would be great if you guys could pitch in.
Monica: Well Id probably be scared of a guy using a fake voice.
Monica: Hey!
Monica: Sweetie! Edges! Fingers! Smudgey! Pictures!
Monica: What, that little thing at the prom?
Monica: I just thought that if I could follow the wire I could find out what it did.
Monica: You painting his toenails?
Ross: Monicas right. Were talking about getting married here. Okay? She-she cant just rush into this.
Monica: Oh, really?!
Monica: Oh God (Starts looking around.) Why dont they put chairs back here?!
Monica: Ill try.