words in movies
[Scene: The Hallway, Phoebe walks up to and knocks on Chandler and Monicas door.]
Monica: (opens the door wearing a robe, but leaves the chain on) Hey, whats up?
Monica: Oh, okay. No problem.
Phoebe: Okay. (Monica closes the door, gets the guitar, and then hands it out.)
Monica: Okay.
Monica: Here you go.
Monica: Okay.
Phoebe: Great! Umm (Monica closes the door again and Phoebe knocks again.)
Monica: What?!
Monica: Phoebe! You kinda caught me at a bad time.
Monica: Yes! Exactly.
Monica: (laughs) No. (Closes the door as Chandler walks up.)
(Chandler lets her into the apartment and reveals that Monica is getting a massage from another woman.)
Monica: Phoebe, I can explain!
Monica: Well umm, Alexandra has been
Monica: Phoebe, dont get upset!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica has opened another wedding present as Chandler enters.]
Monica: Hi honey. We just got a wedding gift from Bob and Faye Bing; they dont like us do they? (They gave them a pok-a-dotted punch bowl.)
Monica: No, it doesnt say where it came from. Where would we return it?
Monica: Why dont we just find a place for it?
Monica: No! Thats where we keep the canned goods! Have you completely forgotten everything you learned at orientation?
Monica: Oh, okay. Here, why dont you let me do it?
Monica: No reason. I-I keep private things in there.
Monica: Feminine stuff.
Monica: Chandler, there is nothing in there that concerns you! If you love me you-youll let it go.
Monica: Thank you! (He tries the door again and Monica glares at him.)
Phoebe: (entering) Hello Chandler, lovely day huh? (To Monica) You!
Chandler: Phoebe if it helps Alexandra has only been massaging Monica for like three years. (Phoebe rolls her eyes and walks away and Monica glares at him.) If! I said, "If it helps!" (Goes to the bedroom.)
Monica: Well its I mean Id justId be self-conscious. Youre my friend; Id be naked.
Phoebe: Monica! We lived together for years! Ive seen you naked!
Monica: Thats different, we were roommates! And when?!
Monica: Hey, come on Phoebe, you can understand why this would be weird for me.
Monica: Okay, if it means that much to you
Monica: Dinosaurs.
[Scene: Phoebe's Apartment, Monica is lying on the massage table waiting for Phoebe.]
Monica: Yes.
Monica: Nice! Wow Phoebe you are good!
Monica: No. Ooohh
Monica: (in a sexy voice) Oh. Oh yeah! Ohhhhh! Ohh! Oh yeah!
Monica: Oh God Phoebe!! (Phoebe covers one ear.) Oh thats it! Thats it! Right there! Oh! (Tries to cover the other ear.) Ooooh-oooh-ooooh (Covers both ears and continues the massage with her elbows.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler has a box of keys and is trying them on the secret closet when someone enters.]
Joey: Whoa, Monica runs a pretty tight ship over here. What are you doing?
Chandler: Monica has a secret closet and she wont let me see whats in it.
Chandler: Why would Monica be keeping Richard in here?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Joey and Chandler are still working on the door.]
Chandler: Maybe Monica has a bobby pin.
Joey: Sure. "Monica."
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is on the couch as Monica enters.]
Monica: Hey.
Monica: I gotta tell you, yesterday was amazing. That massage felt so good!
Monica: So umm, what do you say we make it a weekly appointment?
Monica: Okay.
Monica: What?
Monica: Whats going on?
Monica: What? (Laughs.)
Monica: What?! Youre crazy! Theres nothing sexual about the noises I make!
Monica: Oh myThis is so embarrassing. Oh my God, Im never gonna get massaged again!
Monica: Really?!
Monica: Are you sure?
Monica: I guess.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is pounding out the hinge pins on the closet door to get it open.]
Monica: (entering) (Gasps) How did you get in there?!
Monica: Oh no! You werent supposed to see this!
Monica: No Chandler, you dont understand! (Chandler starts singing the theme for Sanford and Son, an old TV show starring Redd Fox.) Okay! Okay! Okay! Fine! Now you know. Okay? Im yknow Im sick.
Monica: Really? You promise you wont tell anyone?
Monica: Well its just umm Im afraid you might mess it up.
[Scene: Phoebe's Apartment, Phoebe is giving Monica another massage.]
Monica: Ohhh.
Monica: Ohh. Oh! Ohh!
Monica: Oh God!
Monica: Oh yeah right there!
Monica: Uh Phoebe?
Joey: Chandler? Forty-five minutes? Well, something is not right. I just can’t believe he would do this to Monica!
Monica: Im just saying, if we put just a little bit of makeup on you.
Monica: Alright, you know, we got it, we got it. Let's play for real. High stakes... big bucks...
Monica: It's just, I'm not good at singing.
Monica: I'm there!
Monica: Only if I don't have to get up and sing.
MONICA: No no, the father can, but um, since I am the roommate I can tell you that she's not here and I'll pass along the message, ok. So bye-bye.
Monica: No no, it's not working on me. Wow! I must be growing up!
Monica: You kissed him?
Monica: I thought you hated him?
Monica: Oh yeah...So how did you end up kissing?
Monica: So are you thinking of starting up something with this guy?
Monica: Okay, listen, there's still some of Chandler's medicine under the sink in the bathroom. Bye!
Monica: Daddy! I dont think we need to hear about the specific positions you and mom had sex.
Monica: (entering, in a hurry) Guys! Guys! I just saw two people having sex in a car right outside.
Monica: Yeah, let-let-lets pretend thats not true.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel, Chandler, Monica, and Joey are there as Phoebe enters.]
Monica: (looks at it more closely) Oh that's an eye removal machine.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel is entering, still pregnant.]
Monica: Wow! You are really fast!
Monica: What?
Monica: No I told you I can't.
Monica: Okay. (As Brenda exits Monica notices something.)
Monica: Im just so excited to make the presents! (Chandler does another sarcastic/scared laugh and leaves.) Shoot!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is watching Joey pace nervously as Rachel enters.]
Monica: What have you heard me sing?
(Monica and Ben sit down on the couch.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is making a drink as Phoebe enters with the fur coat.]
Monica: Wait wait! I can't sing in front of all these people.
Monica: Yeah, but I love you more. Besides yknow, nothing goes with Bing. So Im screwed. I mean (Rachel hands Emma to Monica.) Oh, hi Emma. Yeah, thats you. Youre our little Em. Oh whats that honey? What? Oh, you want a little cousin? (To Chandler) You want a cousin right now?!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's]
Monica: "To take you to his mansion in the sky-y?"
Monica: Oh, I still cant believe my dad saw us having sex! He didnt make it to one of piano recitals, but this he sees!
Ross: No, its not just cause Im jealous. (Both Monica and Chandler give him a Come on look) I mean Im not, Im not, Im not jealous, okay? Its Look, the guy, he screamed, he actually screamed at this couple sitting in our seats.
Monica: Mom�s here? I wanted to have lunch with her today, she told me she was out of town.
MONICA: (smiling) I arranged some pillows on the bed to look like a guy.
Monica: What Phoebe meant to say was umm, how come youre having a party and were not invited?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's]
Monica: All right, watch!
Monica: And they love me!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, time has lapsed, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler, and Monica are sitting at the kitchen table.]
Monica: If you're not going then I don't want to go either.
Ross: Hey, hello! mmwa! (kisses Carol) I brought all the books, and Monica sends her love, along with this lasagna.
Monica: What are you doing?! Chandler! You cant just go back a phase!
<Amy pushes Rachel and Monica goes berserk and runs around the table>
Monica: Ok, right about now the turkey should be crispy on the outside, juicy on the inside. Why are we standing here?
Monica: He's not great umm, but he's dealing with it. Oh wait a minute, you're not gonna try
Monica: I don't care. <pauses and realizes...> Oh my god. I've lost the will to scold.
(Monica enters and Chandler screams stuff at the TV.)
Monica: Hey!
Monica: Oh my god.
Monica: Oh, it's perfect.
Monica: Sure, we'll do that. What are you up to?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, later that night, there is someone knocking on the door and Chandler stumbles out into the living room, turns on the light, looks through the peephole, and opens the door.]
Monica: I thought I lost it. I got a new one, like, a month ago.
Monica: No, it's not.
Monica: Yeah.
(Monica looks at him.)
Monica: Okay.
Monica: Chandler!
Monica: So, let's do this.
Monica: We're okay. I'm still ovulating.
Monica: Canoodling?
Monica: I guess you're right.
[Scene: The Airport, Chandler and Monica are following the previous couple through a tiny hallway that proves this is a set on a sound stage and not an actual airport, and see them enter the first class lounge.]
Joey: So what's it gonna be? (Monica whispers in Joey's ear. Ross gets up and waves arms frantically in protest)
Monica: What are you doing?
Monica: She's asleep.
Monica: She's asleep. Chandler?
Monica (laughs): Okay, I'll try.
Monica: Ross is really strong! Okay, hes the strongest out of all three of you! (Joey looks at her.) Except for Joey.
Monica: Two guys in one night? Wow, I thought she became a slut after she got her nose fixed.
Monica: Yes, but we have to be fast.
Rachel: Oh God Monica hi! Thank God! I just went to your building and you weren't there and then this guy with a big hammer said you might be here and you are, you are!
Monica: (Doesn't believe what she's hearing) Was your cabin pressurised?
Monica: Oh, I wish I didn't have to wait to take a pregnancy test.
Monica: Well, that was weird. You were loud, and I was fast.
Monica: Well, I'm sorry, but Chandler and I could really use a weekend away. You know, to reconnect... emotionally.
Monica: Oh my god, where's Emma? Where's Emma?
Monica: Oh my god, then...
Rachel: Of course I packed! Monica relax! I just wanted to ask Phoebe her opinion on what I should wear tonight.
Monica (on phone): Hey, Rach, how's it going?
Monica: Hey, did you stop by here?
Monica: No, we weren't!
(Monica hangs up, and Rachel looks at her phone.)
Monica (to Joey): Why the hell did you take her?
Monica: Oh, thank god! Emma, there you are!
Monica: Unless what?
Chandler: Well... there's surrogacy, but Monica has dreamt her whole life of carrying a child, she has felt that watching a surrogate would be... too hard for her.
Ross: Hows Monica coming along with her vows?
MONICA: Yes, because all good plans start with, "I'll go down the fire escape."
Phoebe: (walking up) Whats up? (Rachel hands her the note and she reads it.) Tell Monica Im sorry. (Pause) Tell her yourself!
Monica: Oh, then bring it on! Oh, unless of course your afraid you might lose to a bunch of girls.
Monica: You say Thank you very much, and then you buy me something pretty. Come on, were gonna put are hands in this bowl, and were gonna start squishing the tomatoes.
Joey: Youre right. Youre right. I-Ill go tell her now before Ross finds out and Ill be gentle. I can do that. I am a gentle person. Oh, by the way. Two people screwing in there (Points to the closet Chandler and Monica were in) if you want to check that out.
Monica: Why not?
Monica: Wow! I Had no idea you had this much pride.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Chandler, and Monica are there as Joey enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is lying in front of the bay window, and the phone rings.]
Monica: Listen...I need to know that what I'm about to ask you, will never get back to Chandler.