words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is taking a jar of olives out of the fridge.]
Joey: (to Monica) Hey, how much will you give me to eat this whole jar of olives?
Monica: I wont give you anything, but youll owe me 2.95.
Monica: Why? (in a motherlike tone) Do you have a report due?
Monica: Okay, lets start with the free messages outside the UN.
Monica: Wow! You might just get the first Nobel prize in rubbing. So what country is this guy from?
Monica: Wheres that?
Monica: I dont have an atlas.
Monica: Oh, but wait I do have a globe.
Monica: Hold on.
Monica: Kay, here you go. (Hands her this tiny little globe.)
Monica: Its a globe and, a pencil sharpener.
Monica: Oh, no thanks.
Monica: Well, if you dont have anything to copy, why are you going down there?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is showing Monica where Sergeis country is.]
Monica: Wow! Its small.
Monica: So you had fun, huh?
Monica: No.
Phoebe and Monica: Hey.
Monica: Oh no, shes still at work, but she told me to tell you to call her.
Monica: All right ah, Ross, this is the extent of my knowledge on the subject. (holds up a notepad) Call Rachel.
Monica: Oh thats my doodle of a ladybug, with a top hat. (to Phoebe) Shes fancy.
Phoebe: (to Monica) Anyway, Im going out with Sergei again tonight, and um, could you come and be the translators date? So that when we, its time for our alone time, you two could split off. Y'know, hes really, hes kinda cute.
Monica: Yeah, well kinda cute, like really kinda cute, or kinda cute like your friend Spackel Back Larry?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is eating the picnic as Rachel comes home from work.]
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Phoebe are on their dates with Sergei and Mischa.]
Monica: Oh, and I can also speak a little French. Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir? (Mischa laughs) Why? What did I say?
Monica: Oh my God! No wonder I get such great service at Cafe Maurice.
Mischa: (to Monica) So I was wondering....
Mischa: (to Phoebe, very quickly) Eh, he said, thank you very much, he thinks you look very pretty tonight, your hair, golden like the sun. (to Monica) So you're a chef?
Monica: Im also thinking about opening up my own restaurant.
Phoebe: Monica, can I talk to you behind my menu, please. (Behind the menu) What are you doing?
Monica: Well, I was having a conversation.
Monica: What do you want me to do? Just sit here silently while you three have a conversation?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is lying in front of the bay window, and the phone rings.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Mark is there, opening Chinese food boxes.]
Mischa: (to Monica) And the vet said it was time. And so from half a world away, while my Mother held the phone to his ear, I said good bye to my dog,. In seven languages.
Monica: Oh. (to Phoebe) Can I have a tissue?
Mischa: (to Monica) Oh, hes unbelievable. I mean for the first time in three years somebody wants to actually want to talk to me, but do you think he would let me enjoy that, no!! (to Sergei) You silly diplomat, why dont you learn some English, Sergei?
Monica: Hey, the mans dog just died.
Mischa: (to Monica) I have just resigned my post. Would you care to accompany me to the Rainbow Room? I have diplomatic coupons.
Monica: It will be my pleasure. (to Phoebe) My guy has diplomatic coupons. Your guy cant even say coupons. (they leave)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is next to the bay window again, Mark has left.]
Chip: So ah, Monica ready yet?
The Museum Official: (on machine) Hi, this is Heldi from the Morgan Chase museum. Im calling for Monica Geller.
Phoebe: Yeah, but Monica, do you actually want to be in a relationship where you can actually use the phrase, "Thats not how your dad used to do it."
Monica: Okay, but all right youre a guy, does it not freak you that youre never gonna sleep with anybody else?
MONICA: Yeah, we switched meat suppliers at work, and the new guys gave me the steaks as sort of a thank-you.
Monica: Is that all?
Monica: (pointing at the drawing, upset) Bye... bye... BIRDIE.
Monica: Ohh, how is he?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is there but Rachel.]
(Tank carries Pete over to the other side of the ring, and we see both Ross and Monica wince in pain.)
Monica: I do?
MONICA: Thank you. This is my friend Phoebe. She's gonna be helping me tonight.
Monica: Thanks, Im set. Do you still live with your parents?
Monica: I know!
Monica: (entering) Oh my God! What happened?
Rachel: (to Monica) So, how was your date?
Chandler, Monica, Joey, and Rachel: Thats a good call. Right.
Monica: No!!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Ross, Phoebe, and Rachel are eating breakfast.]
Phoebe: We've got the ground-up flesh of formerly cute cows and turkeys, ew... (hands meat to Monica)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey enters, upset.]
Monica: I knew that! Rachel! Use youre head!
Monica: Let me ask you a question.
Monica: Oh yeah, she didnt hire me out of pity, it wasnt so she could pick on me in front of her friends, she actually thinks Im good.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the game is about to begin.]
Monica: Yeah, I thought it was cute.
Monica: Why did you hire me?
Monica: Well, well Ross didnt care enough to be here, so I think hes out. You snooze you lose.
Monica, Chandler, Phoebe, and Rachel: Oh yeah, I totally agree.
Monica: What?
Monica: I dont want things to change! Do you?
(Phoebe and Monica both stand up and gasp.)
Monica: And that's Pete's Mom.
MONICA: I'm a twinkie.
Monica: Frozen lasagnas?
Monica: Then why are you laughing?
MONICA: Do you want me to cry? Is that what you want? Do you wanna see me cry?
Monica: You guys, Joey just saw Janice kissing her ex-husband.
Monica: You promised Dr. Weinburg, youd never use that phrase.
Monica: Oh my God! Thats Pete! But why is Bill huggin Pete?
[cut to Monica telling the gang about what happened at Petes]
Phoebe: (to Monica) Then why are you answering? Do you at least know what route were on?
Erica: Yeah... it's almost definitely him. (Monica and Chandler look confused now)
Monica: No honey, Im sorry, but the weekends not over yet.
MONICA: This is so wild. Ya know, I gotta admit, I was kinda surprised that you agreed to go on a blind date.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Ross, Monica, and Rachel are sitting around after the party. Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe enter.]
Monica: Isnt he an architect now?
Monica: You better believe he's tired, after the day we had! If you know what I mean. You know what I mean?
Monica: Hi.
Monica: I missed this apartment! Now, this is a grown-ups apartment! Yknow, I-I should be with a grown-up, do you know what I mean?!
Monica: What?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's Apartment, Monica is cleaning up, Chandler is sitting on the couch, checking the Job offers in a Newspaper.]
Ross: Monica, uh Dad called this morning and ah, Aunt Silvia passed away.
Rachel: Oh wow. Why dont we just take me (Grabs her pin) and put me with a Manhattan in my hand, talking to the cute bartender. (Puts her pin at the bar and laughs. Monica just glares at her.) These pins arent for playing are they?
Monica: That was not an incident! I-I was gesturing, a-and the plate slipped out of my hand.
Monica: Well, because we want to get to know her better and she's never been to New York so she wants to see all the tourists' spots... you know, Statue of Liberty, Empire State Building...
Monica: I cant live like this! What are we gonna do? What are we gonna do?
Ross: Monica and I have a grandmother who died, you both went to her funeral, name that grandmother!
Phoebe: (turning around, insistently) Monica!
Monica: Well?
Monica: Really?!
Monica: And you?
Monica: Yes!!
Monica: Wow!
Monica: I know this is going to sound unbelievably selfish, but, were you planning on bringing up the whole baby/lesbian thing? Because I think it might take some of the heat off me.
Monica: (chuckles) Hmm, well you're around me all the time and you don't flirt.
Monica: Rachel!
Monica: Third door on the left.
Monica: No fair. I don't even have one. How come they get two?
Fat Monica: Hi, I'm Ross's little sister.
Monica: Well, at least youre not hearing it for the first time at your fifth grade Halloween party.
(Ross spots Chandler and starts chasing him around the kitchen table. Chandler runs and hides behind Monica.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is on the phone, Chandler and Monica are sitting in the living room, and Ross is in the kitchen as Rachel enters from her bedroom.]
Monica: So do them for free.
Monica: Whats the matter?
Monica: Now? Is it okay if I go out with Chip Matthews?
Monica: I told you not to go down there!
(Joey slides a plate away from Monica towards Chandler, who hides it under the table.)
Monica: (Entering from her bedroom) How desperate am I?
MONICA: No, I don't even know how serious he is about me. Until I do, I'm not telling them anything.
Monica: His dancing partner?!
Monica: (sets down some cards) Gin.
Monica: Wait, now so you joined the gym?
Monica: Good? Didn�t you hear them...I was great! Thank you so much for making me do this. That�s is the best gift ever.
(He exits leaving a stunned Phoebe and Monica.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross, Chandler, Joey, and Monica admiring their new table.]
Chandler: Monica, I think you've gone over to the bad place.
Rachel: (to Monica) I mean is that woman capable of talking about anything else but sex?
Monica: They baked it. I cant take this anymore. Im gonna call a meeting tonight, Im gonna fire you tonight.
Monica: Yes you did! You did like a little hop.
[Cut to the Men's room. Chandler is practicing flashing his badge as Monica enters.]
Monica: Its like two miles!
Phoebe: Well, who cares what your Mom thinks? So you pulled a Monica.
Monica: Oh my Gosh!
[Scene: Central Perk, the next morning. Chandler, Monica, Ross, and Rachel are there.]
Monica: Just be yourself. But, not too much.
Monica: Okay, look, I-I have enough stuff for one more sandwich, I mean I was going to eat it myself, but (motions that he can have it.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe and Rachel are in the kitchen as there is a knock on the door. Rachel answers it.]
Monica: Rach, try holding her a different way.
MONICA: Did you know I was allergic to shellfish?