words in movies
Monica: Hey Phoebe... how you doin'? You feelin' better?
Phoebe: Oh God, I tried everything to make myself feel better. I even tried writing a song about it... but... I can't think of anything that rhymes with AARRGGHH!! (pause) Hey Monica, I really need your help getting through this...
Monica: Ok, you got it!
Monica: Really? If that's what you want...
Monica: Damn it! Rookie mistake!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's. Chandler is looking at the screen of his laptop, shaking his head.]
Monica: Alright, wait a second, why would Ross tell everyone in your class that you are as... (reads from the screen) "gay as the day is long"?
Monica: But that's clearly a joke. This could easily be true. (Phone rings)
Monica: (On the phone) Hello? No, he's not here. Yeah, this is his wife. Yeah, well, it came as quite a shock to me too. I guess I should have known. Yeah, I mean, he just kept making me watch Moulin Rouge.
Chandler: Hang up, hang up. And that was a great movie! (Monica hangs up) I'm so gonna get back at Ross... oh yeah, this will show him, here we go (starts typing something).
Monica: What are you doing?
Monica: Okay if Mike were here what would the two of you be doing?
Monica: What are you, animals? It's 4 o'clock in the afternoon!
Monica: Phoebe, that's how it starts. I don't need to eat the cake, I'll just smell the icing... why don't I just eat a little sliver, or, okay, just a slice or two. And next thing you know, you're 210 pounds and you get wedged in going down the tunnel slide. Phoebe, honey, I know this is hard. Look, if you talk to him, you're going to wanna see him. And if you see him, you're going to want to get back together with him. I know that's not what you want. (pause) Give me your phone.
Monica: And now your cell.
Phoebe: Okay (she takes a huge, clearly obsolete cellphone she keeps in a closet and gives it to Monica)
Monica: This is your cellphone?
Monica: This is your current cellphone?
Monica: Phoebe, where's your purse?
(They run for Phoebe's purse, Phoebe gets there first and takes the cell. Monica tries to take it away from her)
Monica: No, no! Give it to me!
Monica: Give it to me!
Monica: I'll go in there.
Monica: Phoebe come here
(they fight a little, the phone falls and Monica picks it up)
Monica: Haha!
Phoebe: Damn you Monica Geller hyphen Bing!
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. Enter Monica]
Monica: Haha!
Monica: So Phoebe, why are there men's shoes by the door.
Monica: Oh, when you get over this breakup we need to go shopping.
Phoebe: Monica, I really appreciate you checking in on me, but I'm actually feeling a lot better. Yeah, I just kinda want to be alone right now.
Monica: Who's that? (goes to open door)
(Monica opens the door and Mike is standing at the doorway)
Monica: (To Mike) What are you doing here?
Monica: Phoebe!
Monica: Damnit Phoebe! How did you even call him?
Monica: Base Unit! Think Monica! Think!
Monica: (to Mike) This doesn't concern you!!
Monica: Look, guys, you can't do this, it's just going to make getting over each other, that much harder.
Monica: Sure! If you're just gonna hang out as friends, then maybe I'll join ya. You know, I'm your friend (to Phoebe) and Mike's friend (Mike is sceptical).
Monica: Oh wow wow wow!! Make room for your friend! (sits herself down between them)
Monica: I've been pretty good!
Monica: Oh no no no no... this is dangerous territory. Keep it clean!
Monica: You know, on the way over here, I saw this drunk guy throw up. And then a pigeon ate it!
Joey: It's Monica, ok?
Rachel: That's not Monica!
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment: Phoebe, Monica and Mike sitting on the couch]
(Monica is getting up from the couch)
Monica: Alright you two, I'm gonna go to the bathroom. Now I don't want anything going on while I'm gone. Here's a few things you can discuss: mucus, fungus and the idea of me and Ross doing it.
Monica: (running back into the room) Kiss him, you fool!!
Monica: Didn't you hear that speech? If you don't kiss him then I will!
Monica: Hi, that's what I'm doing for Phoebe!
Monica: Excuse me?
Monica: Hey, at least I knew where my guy was.
Monica: You didn't hear the speech!
Monica: Hey, it was very moving! You're just heartless!
Monica: You're... weird!
Monica: Oh (realizes her pants are undone and zips them up)!
Monica: Damn it!
Monica: And I blame you too.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment]
(Chandler and Monica go open the door)
Monica: Hi, glad you could come.
Monica: So, did you know Ross well?
Monica: (a bit surprised) Yes, he is. Me.
Monica: I look like a man??
Chandler: You gave them one day's notice, not everyone in our class checks the web site everyday and Monica... it's probably the way you stand!
Monica: You are married though.
Ross: (on the phone) No Mum, I'm not dead. I know it's not something to kid about. It was just a practical joke between Chandler and me, but it's over, ok? (pause) Actually no, even if I had died, you would not be left childless. (pause) Monica?
(Phoebe snaps the ball to Monica, who pitches back to Rachel.)
Monica: I've got a plan. I've got a plan. I'm going to ram this platter really hard into your ribs. You're gonna scream out and that'll wake her up!
Chandler: You cant just call Monicas room.
Monica: Oh, it was great! The widow wouldn't pay, so Phoebe yelled at her 'til she did.
Monica: All right, youre hired!
[Scene: The delivery room, everyone except Rachel is there. Phoebe, Monica, and Ross are holding the babies.]
Monica, Rachel, and Joey: Yes!
MONICA: Well, I guess now we can't go.
Monica: Well you know it's just like living with a girl. Only they don't steal your makeup. Unless they're playing "This is what my sister would look like" (Looks at Chandler)
Monica: You want a problem? Ill give you a problem!
Monica: Hey.
Monica: What are you doing?!
Ross: Oh, thanks, thanks. So Monica tells me that uh, you dont want to play anymore because me and y'know my talent. Is that true?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is making reservations.]
Monica: (sees two people exit) Okay, those people just left, come on! Quick! Give him the money and get their table!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is working as Monica enters.]
Monica: What the hell happened?!
Monica: What kinda things have you been saying?
Monica: (holding up a glove) Oh, an old glove?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, later that same night. There is a knock on the door and Chandler answers it to reveal Emily standing behind it.]
[Cut to Central Perk, Ross, Phoebe, Monica, and Chandler are there. I think its The One With The Joke.]
Monica: How do you feel?
Monica: Oh, then you do know it. (pause) So um what kind of things do you write about?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the game is coming to a close.]
Monica: Oh God! Orange juice just came out of my nose, but it was totally worth it. Oh my God, I completely forgot about your sound.
Monica: Who cares? He works in a museum!
Monica: You did a minute ago!
Monica: Fine!
Monica: Thats not funny.
Monica: You do?
Monica: (brings a plate of tiny appetizers over) Here you go, maybe this'll cheer you up.
Monica: Okay Ben, why don't you come open some more presents, and Santa, the Armadillo, and I have a little talk in the kitchen? There's a sentence, I never thought I'd say.
Monica: Enough!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Mrs. Green is telling Ross what needs to be done to baby proof his apartment.]
Monica: I know, but look at me all tan.
Joey: Well, we have to say something! We have to get it out! Its eating me alive!! Monica got stung by a jellyfish.
Monica: Now, are you glad we didnt start with the bikini strips?
MONICA: Good, they feel good, in my head.
Chandler, Monica, and Rachel: Great!! Thats great!
MONICA: Yeah, well you promised Barry, you'd marry him. (Rachel glares at her, and she retreats to safety between Richard's legs)
Monica: Really?! How much?!
Monica: Are you serious?
Ross: Eww! No!! Her ear! All right, Monica categorizes her towels. How many categories are there?
Monica: We just want you to think it through.
MONICA: No forget it, I'm not gonna tell you now.
Chandler: And here is the bottle of wine for you to bring over tonight. (Hands it to him.) You were also going to buy Monica flowers but you couldnt afford it, because you paid dinner last night.
Monica: Why cant you use the phone in here?
Monica: And the sex?
Monica: No, you messed it up. Youre stupid.
Monica: How'd it go?
Monica: No, he'll be fine. It's the other five I'm worried about.
Monica: Then what is it?
Dr. Rosen: So, Monica, what do you do?
Monica: Yeah, you should.
Monica: Y'know what, Ive got to walk out of here right now, cause getting over you is the hardest thing that I have ever had to do. I dont think I could do it again.
Monica: Go on.
Monica: Have you ever taken out the trash? (Hands her the garbage.)
Rachel: (looks at Monica) (to him) Do you want my pickle?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler have gone through the phone book and found Greg and Jennys number which Monica has just dialed.]
Monica: Yknow what, lets do the catering business.
Monica: I cannot believe you broke up with her just like that.
Monica: (louder) A positive atmosphere! But I-I-I have had it up to here. (She holds her hand over her head as an afterthought.) From now on, it is gonna be my way, or the highway! All right? Does anybody have a problem with that?!! (Joey looks at the money hes holding, and doesnt speak up.) Hey new guy! I said, does anybody have a problem with that?!
Monica: Hey!
Monica: What?!
Monica: (to Chandler) So, did you do it?
Monica: Uh-oh, it was bad?
[cut to Monica cleaning the floor in the kitchen]
Monica: I was probably waiting for it to open.
Monica: Its kind of an important one!
Rachel: Let me see that. (Monica shows her) Oh, yeah.
Monica: Look Rach, we have to move. I mean if they had lost, we wouldve made them get rid of the birds. Right?
Monica: Well?
Ross: You have 30 seconds. And the lightning round beginsstop it (Chandler stops jumping)now. What was Monicas nickname when she was a field hockey goalie?
Monica: Back then, I thought that I would never, ever get the chance to go out with a Chip Matthews, and now hes-hes called me up and asked me out. And the fat girl inside of me really wants to go. I-I owe her this. I never let her eat.
Monica: Hey!
(Theres a knock on the door and Monica answers it.)
Monica: What is it?!
Phoebe: Yeah, but youve got to pull yourself together! Monica cant see you like this! Then shell know somethings wrong!
Joey: Sure! (Monica gets very depressed) But hey, you know this way sounds good too.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is getting coffee as Phoebe enters.]
Monica: Oh my God, are you out of a job?
Monica: Yeah, I think I have some around here somewhere. Why?
Joey: Oh yeah. If you ah, move your hamper, you see what color the tile used to be. (Monica gasps) Yeah.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, erm, Monica and Rachel's, Monica is still unpacking after the move, and Phoebe is their also.]
Monica: What are you doing?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica and Erica enter, Chandler is in the kitchen.]
Monica: Umm. (Looks at Chandler who is using the phone.) Umm. Umm. I don't think so.
MONICA: [carrying an ice cube tray] Ice, ice, ice squares anyone? Take a napkin. Alright.
MONICA: I don't know, I lost it all ok. I lost it.
Rachel: (to Monica) Did you know he was in there?
Monica: (popping back up) Regular or decaf?
Ross: (To Rachel) Hey are you getting Monica and Chandler an engagement present?
Monica: (entering) Hey!
Monica: And it has to go perfectly, because if she doesn't like something about us she can keep us off every adoption list in the state.
MONICA: If you really want to watch that Serengetti thing, you can.
Monica: Oh that's okay. Dont worry about it, you can give it to me when we get back.
Monica: Oh, well... um, that's all there are of these. But in about eight and a half minutes, we'll be serving some delicious onion tartlets.
Chandler: Okay! (He joins her on one knee) Okay! Okay! Oh God, I thought (Starting to cry, pauses) Wait a minute, I-I can do this. (Pause) I thought that it mattered what I said or where I said it. Then I realized the only thing that matters is that you, (Pause) you make me happier than I ever thought I could be. (Starting to cry again.) And if youll let me, I will spend the rest of my life trying to make you feel the same way. (Pause as he gets out the ring.) Monica, will you marry me?
Monica: Well, my breasts are going to get bigger weather you like it or not! And you know what? It's not just my breasts. My ass is going to get bigger too.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there as Monica enters.]