words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Everyone except Ross is there watching Days of Our Lives.]
MONICA: We, we just wanna see the end.
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe is singing. Monica, Richard, Ross, and Rachel are listening.]
MONICA: Ya know, I was thinking. Ya know how we always stay at your apartment? Well, I thought maybe tonight we'd stay at my place.
MONICA: Well, maybe you don't need them.
MONICA: Shut up, I'm happy.
PHOEBE: Oh, this is so nice. Alright I have to make a speech. I just wanna say that of all the guys that Monica has been with, and that is a lot, I like you the best.
MONICA: Not a lot, Phoebe's kidding, Phoebe's crazy.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica, Richard, Ross, and Rachel are returning.]
MONICA: Well it wasn't that many guys. I mean, if you consider how many guys there actually are, it's a very small percentage.
MONICA: Alright, before I tell you, uh, why don't you tell me how many women you've been with.
MONICA: Two? TWO? How is that possible? I mean, have you seen you?
MONICA: Two it is. Ok, time for bed, I'm gonna go brush my teeth. [goes in the bathroom]
MONICA: Ok, it is definitely less than a ballpark.
RACHEL: Wow, I am so glad I'm not Monica right now.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Richard are in Monica's bedroom.]
MONICA: Well yeah.
MONICA: You really ok with it?
MONICA: Oh, yay. Ok about that two.
MONICA: Well, it just seems like a really small number.
MONICA: And, well, don't you have a lot of wild oats to sew? Or is that what you're doing with me? Oh my God, am I an oat?
MONICA: But you've only slept with two people.
MONICA: Wow. Oh wow. You know I love you too, right.
[later in the bathroom Monica is looking in the drawer, Rachel runs up]
MONICA: Hi. Richard just told me he loves me.
MONICA: I know. I just can't find...
MONICA: You need one too?
MONICA: There's only one.
RICHARD: Monica.
MONICA: Hi. Uh, we'll be right there, we're just trying to decide something. [shuts the bathroom door]
MONICA: No.
MONICA: Alright, I tell you what, I'll give this to you now if you can tell me where we keep the dustpan.
MONICA: Yeah.
RACHEL and MONICA: One two three. [Rachel picks rock, Monica picks scissors]
MONICA: Fine, go have sex.
MONICA: It's not gonna happen. They're doing it tonight, we can do it tomorrow.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. All but Joey are present.]
MONICA: Why?
MONICA: Wait, he's not here yet.
MONICA: Alright.
MONICA: Did they just kill off Joey?
MONICA: And some of us really have to pee.
MONICA: Sorry Joey [runs to the bathroom]
PHOEBE: Yes, I was going to incorporate that. Oh good, here's Monica, she'll have something nice to say.
MONICA: Um, I straightened out your shower curtain so you won't get mildew. What? To me that's nice.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment.]
Monica: There's nothing to tell! He's just some guy I work with!
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, Phoebe, and Monica are there.]
Monica: Okay, just stay there a couple more hours and if she doesnt show up by then, then just come on home.
Monica: Are you okay, sweetie?
Monica: No you don't.
Monica: (explaining to the others) Carol moved her stuff out today.
Monica: (holding up a small cowboy hat) This isnt mine. (Sets it down and looks at the rest of the boxes.) Hey, this isnt, this isnt my stuff! Ugh, Ross! (Grabs and holds up a doll.) These are your boxes! Where are my boxes?
Monica: Rachel?!
Monica: Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date. It's just two people going out to dinner and- not having sex.
Ross: 'Pwease, Aunt Monica, pwease?' Oh, unclench. You're not even gonna be there.
Monica: No I dont know Chandler! Not anymore! Its like its like somethings changed.
Monica: Who wasn't invited to the wedding.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang is there eating breakfast. Chandler is cleaning out his wallet.]
(Phoebe, Monica, and Rachel enters.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, with a blanket draped over her shoulders, opens the door to a similarly clad Chandler.]
Monica: What are you doing here so early?
Monica: Oh, by the way, you are more than welcome to look under any of the furniture, because, believe me, you won't find any porn or cigarettes under there!
Monica: Just breathe, breathe.. that's it. Just try to think of nice calm things...
Monica: Yes!
Monica: (horrified) Really?
Monica: Oh well, maybe we can put it in the guest bedroom.
(Monica goes to change.)
Monica: Change! Okay, sit down. (Shows Paul in) Two seconds.
Monica: No it's not. We had an inspection and they didn't find anything.
Monica: (entering) Oh good youre all here. Thanksgiving tomorrow, four oclock. (To Rachel) Oh, guess who I invited. Remember that guy Will Colbert from high school?
Monica: All right, Ive got a whole bunch of uh-uh, stuff in this area, but umm, Im getting the feeling that you dont want to deliver.
Monica: Oh my God!
Rachel: (as Monica) And by the way, have I mentioned that back in high school, I was a cow?
Chandler: I am only one man! (Monica heads out) Okay Ross, time is up!
Monica: Ok...ay.
Monica: It's no big deal, I do it all the time.
MONICA: No, a doctor of meat. Of course he's a real doctor. And he's handsome, and he's sweet, and know you'd like him. [she puts her arm around Richard]
Phoebe: Ohh! All right! All right. Heres what well do, Ill get twice as drunk as Monica and then no ones will even notice her.
Monica: Wow! Thats great! Dad must really like you, he doesnt ask just anyone to play.
Chandler: Oh come on guys, its not like I moved to Europe! I just moved across the hall! And we would have you over all the time if it werent for (struggles to get this out) Monicas allergies. (The duck quacks.) Youre right, I could never lie to you. She hates you. (The phone rings.) Should I get that? (Laughs, then answers the phone.) Hello? (Listens) Uh no, Joeys not here right now. Can I take a message? (Listens) Yeah, okay so the audition has been moved from 5:00 to 2:30? (Listens) Okay great. (Listens.) Bye. (Hangs up the phone and goes to write the message on the Magna-Doodle on the door but Monica walks in and forces him to jump out of the way.)
Monica: (pause)...Yeah. Yeah, I do.
Monica: What?..... What, you wanna spell it out with noodles?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is telling Phoebe, Monica, and Chandler about Emily's ultimatum.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica has opened another wedding present as Chandler enters.]
(Monica and Paul walk to the door and talk in a low voice so the others can't hear. The others move Monica's table closer to the door so that they can.)
Monica: Stop!
Monica: We'll talk later.
Monica: Hey sweetie. Oh good. (Takes the baking dish from her.)
Monica: Shut up, and put my table back.
MONICA: Joey they're not real. I start miles beneath the surface of these things, ok, they're fake. See [squeezes her breast] honk honk.
Monica: Yeah, we all have jobs. See, that's how we buy stuff.
Monica: What for?
(Monica is standing by the crib, and she's looking at her babies.)
Monica: Do you realize that four weeks from today were getting married? Four weeks baby!! Four weeks!!!
(Monica exits.)
Monica: Big time!
Monica: So how you doing today? Did you sleep okay? Talk to Barry? I can't stop smiling.
MONICA: Oh I was just doing Chandler's side of the conversation.� You know, like, "Hi, How do I look?"� (As Chandler) "Really sexy.� Could I BE any more turned on?"
Monica: No! No its not! Its not gonna be okay! It sucks! No swing band! No lilies!
Monica: How do you do that?
Monica: You know Paul?
Frannie: Hey, Monica!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are sitting at the kitchen table.]
Monica: We are going to Dick Clarks New Years Rocking Eve!
Monica: I know, he's just so, so... Do you remember you and Tony DeMarco?
Monica: How'd you pay for them?
Monica: And who pays for that?
Monica: All right, you ready?
Monica: You can, I know you can!
Monica: Welcome to the real world! It sucks. You're gonna love it!
Ross: It was 5:30 in the morning, and you had rambled on for 18 pages. Front and back!! (they go into the living room, trapping Monica, Chandler, and Joey in the kitchen) (to Rachel) Oh-oh-oh, and by the way, Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means you are, Y-O-U-R means your!
Monica: You be okay?
Monica: Oh my God, that place has the creamiest frosting! I use to hitchhike there when I was a kid.
Fake Monica: So once they caught on to the fact that we're, y'know, short and have breasts...
Monica: See ya.... Waitwait, what's with you?
Monica: (to Phoebe) Would you stop?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is there as Rachel enters.]
Monica: Absolutely.
Monica: No, Chandlers still in Phase One, and Joeys that thing you smell.
Monica: ...They threw us out! I was thrown out of a hotel! Me!
Monica: Groomsman, groomsman, why are you just standing there, where is your bridesmaid? (into microphone) We've got a broken arrow. Bridesmaid down! (realizes) Oh, that's me.
Monica: It's "Bolero" from "10".
Monica: What?
Monica: Okay, just so you know, I'm gonna be ovulating from tomorrow until the sixth, so don't touch yourself in the next 48 hours.
Monica: You didn't.
Monica: Hey. Oh good-good youre here! All right, I figured it out. Im gonna take two tables of eight, Im gonna add your parents, and Im gonna turn them into three tables of six. Okay? And I called the caterer; I added two extra meals, we are good to go!
Monica: Easy Rach, we'll find it. (To all) Won't we!
Monica: How bout one last game of racquetball?
Monica: What happened to your rule about never sleeping with sick people?
Monica: (yelling from the bedroom) Shut up, Joey!
(There's a knock on the door and Chandler gets up to answer it. He opens the door to reveal Monica with a turkey over her head.)
Monica: Phoebe, its okay. You dont have to tip toe around me. I-Ive been thinking about it and umm, yknow what? Im okay about not having that new relationship feeling
[Scene, Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Ross are pouring wine for their parents.]
Monica: Come on, that was back in high school! How could that still bother you?
Fake Monica: Oh, by the way, tomorrow we're auditioning for a Broadway show.
Monica: No it's not.
Monica: What's that supposed to mean?
Monica: (to Ross) Are, are you okay? I mean, do you want me to stay?
Monica: 'Scuse me?
Mrs. Geller: (To Monica) And you knew about this?!
Monica: W-w-wh-... wha-... w-w-w-...
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, is the one where Rachel screwed up the desert and Ross and Joey are trying to enjoy it.]
Phoebe: Oh, this is like the best day ever. Ever! You guys might get back together, Monica and Chandler are getting their baby, there are chicks and ducks in the world again! Oh, I feel like I'm in a musical! (Singing) "Daa - raa... When the sun comes up, bright and beaming! And the moon comes..."
Monica: (slapping his hand) Hey!
(Monica starts to fluff a pillow.)