words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Phoebe are preparing for Rachels baby shower.]
Monica: Hey!
Monica: Also both of your sisters called and neither can make it.
Monica: Oh my God, your mother!
Monica: Well, given that we forgot to invite her it would be an awfully big coincidence if she was.
Monica: Well it wasnt my fault, Phoebe was in charge of the invitations!
Monica: (interrupting her) Oh give it a rest!
Monica: Okay, yknow what? Dont worry, okay? Well take care of it. Well call her. Just go home and get ready.
Monica: Go! I have it in my book. Go! (Rachel leaves and Monica calls Mrs. Green.) (To Phoebe) Wait a minute! If youre in charge of the invitations why am I the one who has to call herHello Mrs. Green! Hi, its Monica Geller.
Mrs. Green: Oh, hello Monica.
Monica: (on phone) Hi, umm I know this is last minute, but weve decided to throw an impromptu baby shower for Rachel today.
Monica: Yeah, Im sorry. Im-Im so sorry.
Monica: (To Phoebe) Oh my God, my ass is sweating! (on phone) Please! Please! Can you come? Its today at four.
Monica: Thank you. (Hangs up.)
Monica: Son of a bitch! (Calls Mrs. Green again.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachels baby shower is underway. Monica and Phoebe are working in the kitchen.]
Monica: You ordered a stripper for the shower?! That is totally inappropriate!
Monica: Hi!
Monica: Yes, thank you so much. And again, were so sorry. We could not feel worse about it.
Monica: Shes still mad.
Monica: Phoebe, Sandras mad at you too. It-it doesnt bother you?
Monica: Okay. I can do that. (Pause) I gotta go powder my ass.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, the baby shower is continuing as Rachel walks over to Monica and Phoebe.]
Monica: What?
Monica: I personally would be honored if she wanted to live with me.
Monica: Thats right. That is right, you go over there and tell her you dont want her to live with you. Do not take no for an answer!
Monica: (To Phoebe) This is great! Now shes gonna be mad at Rachel! Yknow what? And Im just gonna swoop in there and be like the daughter she never had.
Monica: Yes! Yes! And I think that the first gift that Rachel opens should be from the grandmother of the baby, because youre the most important person in this room. And in the world!
Monica: Rachel, listen to your mother. She is very smart.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, the baby shower has ended and everyone except for Mrs. Green have left who is talking to Rachel while Monica and Phoebe are cleaning up.]
Mrs. Green: Now dont worry! Everythings gonna be okay. (Hugs Rachel while she is standing and Rachel is sitting, seeing this Monica decides to join in on the hugging by hugging Mrs. Green from behind her back.)
Monica: It is going to be okay! (Mrs. Green glances over her shoulder and glares at Monica while she heads for the bathroom.) It was worth a shot.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Mrs. Green is telling Ross what needs to be done to baby proof his apartment.]
Rachel: Oh no? Pheebs? Monica? Do I know anything about babies?
Monica: Its frightening.
Monica: (laughs) Youre still so funny. Youre so funny. (To Phoebe) What do I do?
Monica: Yknow what? Youre-youre right.
Monica: Really?
Monica: Okay! I will! Mrs. Green? Mrs. Green! (She ignores Monica and Monica follows her out into the hall with Phoebe in tow.) It is rude to leave a party without saying good-bye to the host! Yeah, and-and also when someone apologizes to you the decent thing to do is to accept it! Now what I did to you, it wasnt on purpose! But what youre during to me now is just plain spiteful!
Monica: Thats right! Maybe its time you took a good hard look at a mirror young lady old lady lady!
Phoebe: (To Monica) Wrap it up, wrap it up, wrap it up
Monica: So whenever youre ready to apologize to me, I will forgive you. Good day! (Monica and Phoebe reenter the apartment and Monica closes the door on a stunned Mrs. Green.) I cant feel my legs!
Monica: Yeah? Im proud of me too.
Monica: Yeah could-could-could you get me something to drink?
Monica: Okay. (When Phoebe turns around Monica runs out into the hall after Mrs. Green.) Mrs. Green! Okay Im really sorry!! Im apologizing for the(She trips and falls down the stairs.) (Pause) Okay, I bit my tongue, but Im still really sorry!
Monica: Joey's gonna be *so* upset.
Monica: Seriously, you don't think we should tell him?
Monica: Well, because every time we do, you make jokes about swinging and scare them away.
Monica: What if he reads it in the paper?
Rachel: Oh, big glamour night. Me and Monica at Laundorama.
Monica: Damnit Phoebe! How did you even call him?
Monica: Thanks.
Erica: No, he's in prison. (More shocked looks from Monica and Chandler)
Monica: Love it!
Monica: Well Im not sure yet, but umm of the top of my head Im thinking double sided tape and some sort of luncheon meat.
Chandler (to Monica): Sure.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the whole gang is there including Janice, theyre watching Happy Days.]
(Chandler and Monica are speechless).
Phoebe: I dont know! (frantically points at Monica)
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Everyone is helping clean the table.]
Monica: This dinner is gonna be so great! In your face, last year "me"!
Chandler: (To Monica and with bulging eyes) Why!?
Monica: No, actually, we're buying the house next door. (Janice gasps)
Monica: (looks confused and scared) I don't know why.
Monica: Oh, who cares, they still love me! "I am so excited..."
Monica: But we love our house.
Monica: Olivia? I thought she was marrying Connor! (pause) Oh right, real life more important.
(Chandler turns to look at Monica, who has the biggest hair ever, is flushed and in a sweat, and is decidedly sniffing her armpits)
Monica: Okay, you come up with an idea.
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, The One Where The Monkey Gets Away, Rachel is watching a soap opera with Marcel.]
Monica: Mira, Ross, Marcel se llevo el control remoto. (Look, Ross, Marcel's got the remote.)
Monica: This is different! Greg and Jenny are in a relationship.
Monica: Oh, yeah, right! And after I took a shower this morning I just threw my towel on the floor! Oh God, it hurts to even joke about it.
(Chandler and Monica enter the room)
Monica: Hey, Rach, you're leaving tomorrow, shouldn't you be packing?
Monica: Oh my God! I have nothing left to teach you! (they hug)
Monica: Here, let me help you. (they both start opening boxes)
Monica: (looking at Phoebe eating something) Pheebs, spit that out, that has pork in it.
Monica: You don't mind me touching your belly, do you?
Monica (to Ross): Okay, well, stop staring at them.
Monica: (walking around with her headset still on) OK LET'S GET THESE CHAIRS OUT HERE! Gunther, hit the Christmas lights. (He does so and the lights above the chairs light up. Monica looks satisfied) Okay, who left the ice sculpture (picks up a piece of ice from the ground) ON THE STEAM GRATE? (nobody answers)
Monica: From?
Monica (enters the room): Are, are you kidding? This is packing?
Chandler: I didn't know Monica had these!
Monica: Hey! Where's Mike?
Monica: Yeah.
Monica: Come here, I'll make you a drink.
Monica: Ok, you're being wierd. Do you want sex or did you do something bad?
Rachel: Ok. Monica?
Monica: Yeah?
Monica: Sure.
Monica: No.
Monica: Rachel used to live in that room.
Monica: What?
Monica: That is so sweet. (they hug)
[Scene: Central Perk. Everyone's sitting on the couch.Monica and Chandler enter]
Rachel: Well, these aren't mine. Maybe Monica used to use them with...
Monica: This is not, what I�m wearing. I�m ovulating and Chandler�s gonna be home any minute, so I thought we would try before dinner.
Monica: This is so great! Now we can enter into doubles tournaments!
Monica: Okay, I've had it with the hair jokes. Tomorrow morning, before we leave, I'm going to the salon.
Monica: You cried yesterday at the six o'clock news.
Chandler: (to Monica) Is it okay that I want you to wear that head set in bed tonight?
Monica: (to Ross) So, I guess you're next. You're ready?
Monica: Yeah. Mine too.
MONICA: Why, it's dinner for six. 5 steaks, and an eggplant for Phoebe.
Monica: (in a sexy voice) Hello, Chandler. (Phoebe has a huge smile on her face.)
Monica: Wait a minute, why dont you just call Mark. (they both look up in shock) I mean, who says you have to sit here and wait for him, youve got to make stuff happen.
Monica: I hope Ross isn't too upset.
Monica: Uh, where do you think you're going?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. The others are still there.]
Monica: Oh no! You and Phoebe are gonna help me in here.
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. Chandler enters. Rachel and monica are seated at the table.]
Monica: You did? How?
Monica: Oh my God! YOU FORGOT THE PIES? Well, I cannot believe this. You force me to make dinner, then you're an hour late and you forget the one little thing that I asked you to do.
Monica: Nana liked it rough!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Chandler is watching TV and Monica is cooking]
Monica: Oh my God!
Monica: Erica, are you okay?
Monica: Okay, okay... Okay, I feel a little better.
Monica: Oh... Yes, I'm sure. Oh honey, let's go. Okay bye everyone.
(Rachel looks shocked, gets over it, notices she's alone, and picks up the phone. The last part of which is something she shouldn't have done, because the phone is already in use. By Monica, and now Rachel can hear every word.)
Monica: Erica, are you okay?
Monica: Oh my God!
Monica: Sorry! I'm justI'm not very good at this! I'm a terrible liar and I hate having to lie to Rachel!
Monica: What?
Monica: What kind of social situation are you comfortable with?
Monica: To use the bathroom.
Monica: Breathe, breathe, breathe... Good.
Monica: Alright, I'll be right back.
Monica: You'll be fine. Nah, you won't, but I'll be back in two minutes.
[Scene: The beach house, its still raining. Chandler is building a sand castle, Rachel is doing Monicas nails, and theyre all drinking margaritas, obviously bored.]
Rachel: (to Monica and Phoebe) Have I been living with him for too long, or did that all just make sense?
Monica: All right fine. Fine, Ill do it. Ive just got to get this off the screen. Carol and Susan are still upset that you taught him pull my finger.
Monica: Okay, now this one is rare, this one is medium well! Now go-go-go! (Phoebe enters) Hey Phoebe!
(Monica gives Chandler a look.)
Monica: It's just a little bit more, honey.
Monica: Oh, you did it!
Monica: Chandler, you don't wanna miss this. This is the birth of your child! It's the miracle of life!
Monica: It's a... It's a boy!
Amanda: (To Monica) Hello!
Monica: So, howd the lasagne go over? (listens) Really?! Good. So you owe me three pretty things. (listens) Yeah, Ive been thinking a lot about you too. (listens) I know. Its hard this whole platonic thing. (listens) Its a word!
Monica: (To Erica) Oh my God, he's beautiful. Thank you so much.
(Monica looks at him.)
Monica: So the wedding caterer sent me this list of twelve appetizers and I have to narrow it down to six.
Monica: I... I'm sorry, who should be along in a what now?