words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang is there except for Rachel and Ross, who both come storming in. Rachel is still going off about Rosss secret marriage.]
Monica: Youre kidding!
Monica: Ross!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Monica are at the counter getting some more coffee.]
Monica: Joey, why dont you put them in the lost and found?
Monica: Oh my God, what a fun day! That sounds great!
Monica: Dont worry about it Phoebe, well absolutely do it.
Monica: Come on Chandler, come on! Itll give us great practice for when(realizes what shes about to say and changes)people with babies come to visit.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe and Rachel are having tea.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next day, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are baby-sitting the triplets. They each have one baby.]
Monica: Pheebs, hows it going?
Monica: Nope, sound like me. Pheebs, its going great. Look at Chandler with little baby girl Chandler.
Monica: What do you mean?
[Time lapse, they have set up a little assembly line for diaper changes. Phoebe wipes, Chandler adds the powder, begrudgingly, and Monica puts the diaper on.]
Monica: This is so great! This is exactly how we set the plates at the restaurant.
Joey: The ones that got me the Porsche! Will you keep up! (Chandler wipes his forehead with a baby wipe, that might have been used. He drops it disgustedly.) But I figured, if-if people keep seeing me just standing there, theyre gonna start to think that I dont own it. So I figured Ill wash it. Right? Monica, you got a bucket and some soap I can borrow?
Monica: Oh yeah, I got soap and sponges and rags and Carnuba wax and polishing compound.
Monica: I know. But umm, one time there was this really dirty car in front of the building, so I washed it.
Monica: And six others.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the triplets are all in their crib as Monica and Phoebe watch them.]
Monica: Yeah, two hours, a lifetime thats the same.
Monica: Chandler, what are you doing? That thing can put someones eye out!
Chandler: Glass, sand, whatever. (Walks out as Monica and Phoebe turn to check on the babies again.)
Monica: Oh its so cute. I wonder what age it is when you stop being able to put both legs over your head.
Monica: How are you still single?!
Monica: Good. What made you change your mind?
Monica: Damnit! Yknow this whole time we were concentrating on watching the babies and, and no one was watching Chandler! (He does it again.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is still doing the hairball thing as Monica and Phoebe are watching the babies. I cant describe it, youll have to see it when it comes on in your area.]
Monica: And people will think you own a Porsche because youre wearing the clothes?
Monica: Joey, you know you dont actually have one.
Monica: All right, thats it, were going to the emergency room.
Monica: The babies are asleep, Im sure youll be okay on your own for a while!
Monica: Hes got something plastic lodged in his throat, weve got to go to the hospital.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is being triple teamed.]
Phoebe: Me taking care of you is no problem, huh? You guys feel safe. Right? Okay, Im gonna take that spit bubble as, "Yeah, I do!" Okay, after I get rid of this dirty diaper Leslie, Ill set you up with a clean one. (She throws it at the garbage without looking, misses, and knocks over a vase and flowers, which fall to the floor and break.) Okay, Im sorry. I didnt mean to scare you. I just have to clean that up. Okay? Cause lets face it, were at Monicas. (She crawls over, disposes of the diaper, picks up the flowers, and the vase.) I broke it. All right. Well, thats just the way that goes. (She throws out both the flowers and the vase.) Okay, good. (She turns around and only counts two babies.) Why are there only two of you? Where is Leslie? Well, you cant answer. (She starts looking for her) Leslie? Where are you Leslie? Leslie, now would be a good time for your first words! (She turns around and finds that Leslie has managed to crawl into the bottom drawer of the TV cabinet.) Well, look at you! Hey! You are a little bit mischievous! My gosh! (She picks her up and notices a surprise is waiting in the drawer.) Oh, youre a lot mischievous! Well, itll dry. (Closes the drawer with her foot.) (To Leslie) Okay, you sit with your brother and sister nowwho arent there! (They both have disappeared as well.)
[Time Lapse, the babies are finally asleep. Good for Phoebe! The only problem is, Monicas apartment looks like a tornado, a hurricane, a swarm of locusts, fire, brimstone, hail, and giant man-eating, radioactive ants have torn the place apart. Needless to say, its messy enough to cause Monica to die of shock right away. Parents with small children know what Im talking about.]
(Monica enters and her jaw drops in horror.)
Monica: Oh my God.
Monica: Phoebe, what, what happened here?!
Monica: But my apartment!
Monica: But the mess!
Monica: Youre right, youre right I shouldnt freak out. Cause this is what will happen when you and I have babies! When will that be?!
[Scene: Rehearsal dinner hall. Ross and Emily are standing in the reception area. Monica arrives with her parents.]
Chandler: Listen er..I need to ask you a favor but you can't tell Monica anything about it.
Monica: Wait Chandler, what are you doing?!
Monica: Not any more.
Chandler: Let me see this guy. (Phoebe hands him the picture.) W-H-Wow! Dont show this to Monica! And dont tell her about the W-H-Wow!
Monica: (to the guys) Not the way they're doing it. What, what happened? How did she die?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are dressing up Ben in the entire rain suit from Rainy Day Bear.]
Monica: Umm, going to the beach. When it stays light real late.
Monica: Chandler has two copies of Annie!
Monica: We have one.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Monica are sitting on the couch, Rachel is on the chair.]
Monica: Yeah, I couldn't be mad at him for too long.
Monica: What? It's still going on.
MONICA: That's good, have a seat. Um, the doctor says it's gotta be a needle. You're just gonna have to be brave, ok? Can you do that for me?
Monica: Yes!
Monica: Okay, good! Okay, what do I want now?
Monica: What?
Monica: Thank you!
Monica: That's right baby! Okay, what do I want now?
Monica: Okay. (Rolls the dice)
Monica: Pick a number! That is your only job!
Monica: Are you serious?!
Monica: What did you just say?
Monica: Oh, that's because I had lunch with RichMe neither! Okay, what do I want now?
Monica: Okay!
Monica: I think so too.
Monica: I've never loved anybody as much as I love you.
Monica: Nobody move! (To Chandler) Okay, you look that way; I'll look this way!
Ross: I.....got.....dressed. Really, really quickly. Okay, okay. (Rachel starts to follow Monica into her room, but Ross stops her and sends her back to her room.) There we go, there we go.
Phoebe: Well okay, let this be a lesson to all of you, all right. Once you, once you betray me, I become like the ice woman, yknow. Very cold, hard, unyielding, y'know nothing, nothing can penetrate this icy exterior. (to Monica) Can I have a tissue, please?
Joey: Hey Ross. This probably isn't the best time to bring it up, but you have to throw a party for Monica.
Monica: You're right. I'm sorry. I should've told you.
Monica: Okay, now we just need something borrowed!
Monica: You look cute in bubbles.
(Paolo enters. Ross, Phoebe, and Monica scatter)
Monica: Why? (in a motherlike tone) Do you have a report due?
Monica: No-no-no! We need something old!
Monica: That'll work!
Monica: That's stealing!
Monica: Ok, hypothetically, why won't I be married when I'm 40?
Phoebe: Well, I've been reading up and for your information, minks are not very nice. Okay, I admit it! I love this coat! Okay, Iit's the best thing I've ever had wrapped around me, including Phil Huntley! (She starts to leave but stops and says to Monica.) Remember Phil Huntley? He was fine!
Chandler: Monica! This is the Men's room! (Pause) Isn't it?
Chandler and Monica: All right.
Monica: What are you doing?
Monica: Yep, we wanna get married!
Monica: Are you sure you wanna do this?
Monica: No, only because that's the graduation song.
Monica: Are you sure you wanna do this?
Monica: You obviously havent screwed over a lot of your friends. (They all look at her) Which we all appreciate.
Monica: Whoa!
Monica: Man, I feel like Im coming down with something.
(Chandler and Monica are stunned again.)
Monica: Uh-huh, but I'm sure you can handle this. I mean, I have won awards for my organizational skills, but, uh, I'm sure you'll do fine.
Monica: Yeah!
Monica: This is insane!
Monica: What are you talking about? If you get married in Vegas youre married everywhere.
Monica: No! To take more pictures of all of us together. I mean I really think it's the best resolution because everyone will enjoy the pictures.
Monica: Boy, I love carrots! Oh! (She picks up a bunch of them and holds them between her fingers.) Sometimes I like to put them between my fingers like this and-and hold them down here while I talk to you. (She is rubbing her hip with the carrots.) Umm, and-and-and y'know if I get really hot umm, I-I like to pick up this knife (She picks up a knife without putting the box down. She's holding the box between her cheek and shoulder) and-and umm, I-I put the cold steal against umm, (Pause) my body. (She doesn't have any exposed skin within reach of the knife, so while holding the carrots in one hand and the box between her face and shoulder, she rubs the knife on her stomach.)
(Monica motions that it went right over Rachel's head.)
Monica: Nothing. Im gonna take a shower.
Monica: Hey.
[Scene: Barry and Mindy's wedding, Monica and Richard are standing in the lobby]
Monica: I wish all guys could be like him.
Monica: Yes I do!
Monica: What are you guys gonna do?
Monica: Ready?
Rachel: Oh thanks, but listen, I was just at Monicas and she and Chandler had a big fight and theyre not moving in.
Monica: So, what do you think we should do?
(Monica rolls the dice.)
Monica: (sarcastic) Come on eight.
Monica: Well, you could actually go to the gym.
Chip: (on machine) Hey Monica, its Chip.
Monica: (to Phoebe) Remember that guy from cooking school I told you about that put cilantro with everything?
Monica: Well, were trying to find someone to perform our wedding and theyre all either boring or annoying or yknow, cant stop staring at the ladies. (Points to her chest.)
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica and Chandler are returning to find Ross is there waiting for them.]
Monica: Have you lost your mind? Chandler, this isn't about me! This is about you and all your weird relationship commitment crap!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is returning from her interview attempt.]
Chandler: (examining the coffee table) Scotch on the rocks, with a twist, on a coaster? Ha-ha, Monica! Monica!
Monica: Okay! Oh God, yknow what? Its really bad.
Monica: He took my snack!
MONICA: Hey, you know I got a question for ya. Just a little thing, no pressure.
Monica: Okay.
Monica: Thank you. Rachel, can I talk to you outside for a sec?
Monica: That kid really kicked me hard on the plane.
Monica: I like that. (Joey starts laughing) What?
Monica: Hey, at least I knew where my guy was.
Monica: Joey, she was listing the countries shes done it in.
Monica: You're so efficient. I love you!
Monica: All right, let's go say good-bye.
Monica: We got out pictures back from London. (Shows her one.) Here's all of us at the Tower of London.
Monica: Well, the end table is wrong, The couch looks bizarre and don't even get me started on the refrigerator magnets.
Chandler: (deadpan, standing next to Monica) We're very happy for you.
Monica: All right, hand me that other box of photos; that's the very last one.
Monica: No, dont say it! Dont even think it!
Monica: Then all your stuff would be here.
Monica: YES!!!!!!!!
Monica: Ready!
Monica: Live together? There have been no signs for that.
Monica: Yes! Okay! Okay! Wait-wait-wait!
Monica: I love you!