words in movies
Monica: (in her apartment, screaming) I LOVE MY NEW JOB!
Monica: YOU BET YOUR ASS I AM! I just had the best first day ever! The kitchen: twice as big as Allessandro's.
Monica: Yeah, a-a-and clean. Not just health department clean... Monica clean.
Monica: Oh, and the people are so nice. There's this one guy, Geoffrey, he's the Maitre D., Chandler, you will love him. He is without a doubt, the funniest guy I have ever met. (Chandler, who was almost asleep again, sits up straight in bed in an instant and can't believe what he just heard.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica sits on the couch and Phoebe is pacing up and down the room.]
Monica: Maybe he didn't give you a chance.
Monica: Oh, well... That had been your window.
Monica: Really? The scientist guy?
Monica: Continue...
Monica: Phoebe!
Monica: Wow, isn't it ironic that David would show up on the same day that you and Mike exchange keys?
Monica: What are you gonna do?
Monica: You have to tell David!
Monica: Heeeeeey!
Chandler: So... Oklahoma is a crazy place. You know, they call it the Sooner state. Frankly I'd sooner be in any other state. (Monica looks at Phoebe, who also doesn't know what to say.) And what's with Oklahoma having a pan handle? Can all states have stuff like that? Hey yeah, I'm from the waistband, Wyoming. But when I was seven, we headed over to the crotch.
Monica: (Doesn't believe what she's hearing) Was your cabin pressurised?
Chandler: What's with the word y'all? You know, just... two words just... pushed together... Are we all allowed to do that, because if so, I say why stop there? You know, your new poodle could be your noodle. And fried chicken? Could be fricken.Waiter, waiter excuse me, I'll have the fricken? (Monica laughs) See, that's... that's funny with the fricken, right?
Monica: No, it just remind me of something this guy did today at work. I told you about that funny guy, Geoffrey, right?
Monica: Well, he did this bit... You probably had to be there, but it was Liza Minelli locked in our freezer, eating a raw chicken. (Phoebe bursts out in a laugh)
Chandler: Hey! (Joey doesn't look up, but gestures 'wait a minute' with his finger while he finishes reading the article. Chandler waits for Joey to finish.) I need you to set me up for a joke. Later, when Monica is around, I need you to ask me about fire trucks.
Chandler: Monica says that her Maitre D. is the funniest guy she's ever met.
Chandler: Ye.... (stops because he realises what Joey just said, and stares at him. At this moment Monica enters)
Monica: Hi! There you are.
Joey: (sees Monica) Fire trucks! (Chandlers eyes double in size and he turns to Monica who doesn't understand what's happening. Then he turns back to Joey, who says "you're welcome" without a sound)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica is in the kitchen and Ross enters.]
Monica: Yeah! I think that's great!
Monica: Oh... How are they?
Monica: Yes... What is the end of that sentence?
Joey: Uhm... A penis model. (Monica can't believe what's she's hearing and Ross pats Joey on the back.) Anyway, hey... Did you tell Chandler that some guy from work is the funniest guy you've ever met?
Monica: Yeah, so?
Monica: Is that why he's acting so weird...? He's jealous...? Oh my God, that is crazy. It's not like I'm attracted to Geoffrey...
Monica: I can't believe he's that upset about this...
Joey: Monica, you have to do some damage control here, okay. 'Cause he's feeling like... (the door opens and Chandler walks in with a pizza)
Chandler: You got a man who's a nanny...? You got a manny...? (Monica starts laughing, but very exaggerated. Joey realises they also should laugh and punches Ross. Now all three of them laugh, but very fake. Chandler seems happy again.)
Monica: Ohhh, ooohhh... you are on a roll, mister!
Monica: Okay, okay... Chandler you... you stop it! (Monica wipes away tears)
Monica: Well, I don't know... I-It's... just the way you say it... I mean, you're funny... You have that funny thing. You're a funny guy! (Chandler turns to Joey)
Monica: Honey, listen... You have nothing to worry about with Geoffrey.
Monica: Well, you're... you're different funny... I mean, you're... you're more sarcastic a-a-and... well, he does... bits... and impressions... and... and limericks...
Monica: Honey, you know I think you're hilarious! Come on, you know that joke you told me last week? The one about Jerry Lewis and the girl with the lazy eye...? (he laughs) That slayed me.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica and Joey are sitting at the dinner table. Chandler comes from the bedroom with his suitcase.]
Monica: Honey, you can relax. Last night at work, Geoffrey told this really sexist joke. After that, not so funny anymore.
Monica: Okay, don't miss that flight. You know I love you.
Chandler: I love you too. (Monica and Chandler kiss. He turns to Joey.) And... I like you as a friend. (They hug and pat each other on the back.)
Joey: (to Monica) Did that guy really make that joke?
Monica: Naaaa... He still kills me. Last night he had me laughing so hard, I swear... a little pee came out.
(We hear the guys start to attack him, but the guy manages to calm them down and gets them to agree to what he did. Monica throws up her hands in disgust.)
Rachel: I did!! I watched! I watched! I watched Monica bang his head against that thing!
[Scene: Their Building, Monica and Rachel are going to apologize to Danny. Rachel knocks on his door, which he opens and he has this really bushy beard and long hair. Picture Paul Bunyan.]
Monica (as Rachel): ..well, why don't you tell them? After all it, is your ankle.
MONICA: No, no, not a party. Just a surprise gathering of some people Rachel knows. Um, this is Phoebe and Chandler and Joey.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is writing a letter by the bay window as Rachel enters.]
MONICA: Wow, all you need now is The Killing Fields and some guacamole and you've got yourself a part-ay.
Joey: No, I'm not questioning it, I'm saying it's stupid! (Notices Monica standing between them and smiling.) What?! (The camera clicks, taking another picture.)
Monica: Honey, theres a reason.
Monica: No! Im not okay!
Monica: Oh, well, I bought Chandler a five hundred dollar watch and he wrote me a rap song.
Monica: Okay Ben, why don't you come open some more presents, and Santa, the Armadillo and I have a little talk in the kitchen? There's a sentence I'd never thought I'd say.
Monica: Break!
Monica: All right, Phoebe get open. Rachel, go long.
Monica: Ow!!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Joey are eating Thanksgiving dinner.]
Monica: Let go!
Monica: No!
Monica: Let go!
Monica: And Rachel. (Chandler clears his voice loudly) And thats Chandler.
Monica: Hi Chandler. It's really nice to see you (rolls her eyes) NOT. (she and Rachel giggle a little and Chandler looks unimpressed)
Monica: Let me think. Oh, when I was younger I used to dream that I got married to Mayor McCheese, and on our wedding night I ate his head.
Monica: I'm so sorry, I can't believe I did this, but I couldn't stop laughing at your Norman Mailer story.
Monica: (entering) Did I miss it? (Phoebe nods no.) Rachel, I-I want you to know that, if its positive, were gonna
Monica: (entering) Ross (who has his foot on the coffee table), foot on the floor or come over no more!
MONICA: What if they get mixed up?
[Scene: The 50's theme cafe. Monica is working the grill, the rest are at a table.]
Monica: Well, no, not at all, you're not terminal, you just, you just need some damage control.
Ross: Hey-hey, its valid okay? And Im not the only one who thinks so, Monica agrees with me.
Monica: Very bad.
Monica: Chandler!!
Monica: No.
Monica: Dont, dont, dont, dont, dont do this.
Monica: Did he just say Monica bang?
Monica: (laughs) Yknow what? I-I dont want a big, fancy wedding.
MONICA: And then he told me he would run away with me, and he didn't. [throws water in his face]
Monica: Wha... How the hell is that gonna help?
Monica: What?
Monica: Youre right, Im sorry. Its not like youre yknow, going out with an ex-girlfriend.
Monica: Oh, is that so? Ok. If that's really what you want, then here... I give you the headset. Well, I don't really want to give you the headset. Well I guess if you're taking over, you should probably return these messages. (hands her a stack of papers with messages and calls to return)
Monica: I heard that!
Chandler: Our balcony? Seriously? That's so funny because I told Monica we should put lights on our balcony. And she said"No, no. It's too cold, nobody will go out there." And I said "Maybe if we put some light out there they will"
Monica: If you would stop thinking about Ross for one minute you would notice that there are great guys everywhere! I mean, look! Look, Gunther! (Gunther turns to listen in.) I mean, he's nice, he's cute.
Monica: Well yknow, Im just-Im just worried that bosses will see them and think they pay you too much money. Or! Or your assistant will see them and-and want a raise!
Monica: Werent you nine?!
Monica: Christmas cookie?
Monica: (very emotional) Because... We may not be who she thinks we are but no-one will ever love that baby more than us.
Monica: Is this the one that I threw out last year?
(Phoebe gets up from the table, and while her back is turned, Rachel and Monica indicate via sign language that they each would have picked the other.)
[Sequence 2: Monica runs upfield and stops, waiting for a pass. Ross runs over and pulls her pants down, steps in front of her and intercepts the pass.]
Monica: Whew. Although yknow, this is part of a salt and pepper set. I mean I guess yknow it may just count as a half a present. What do you think?
Monica: (she reaches out for it and stops) Oh God! I gotta go! (runs out)
Rachel: (surprised by how ugly it is) Wow! (sarcastic) Oh, she's so nice and big! Oh, Monica, where are you going to display Gladys oh so proudly? (looks around for a spot)
Monica: It's because I'm scrappy.
Monica: Do you see this? (Mimics him drooling over a womans breasts.)
Monica: Um-mm.
Monica: Honey, whats the matter?
MONICA: You know what. Tomorrow I'm gonna do your clocks.
Monica: Ah-ah-ah, now you started this, you will finish it.
Monica: Its Joeys birthday.
Monica: Ok. Great. I am so glad that you are here. We’re really excited about getting this process started.
Monica: I know honey, Im sorry.
Monica: Okay, we'll start with the building. You guys take the first and second floor, Phoebe and I'll take third and fourth.
Monica: So, you think you'll do it on his couch?
Gunther: (to Monica and Phoebe) Hey guys.
Monica: Oh my!!
Chandler: (to Monica) Take off your shirt!
Monica: (to Chandler) Stick out your tongue.
(Cut to Ross and Monica)
Monica: Hi.
Monica: Isnt that great?
Monica: Hang on a second I just got in.
Ross: It's a big deal to me. This is great, Monica. I really appreciate this.
Monica: What is the worse part?
Monica: Thats okay.
MONICA: Two? TWO? How is that possible? I mean, have you seen you?
Monica: That was me.
Monica: Y'know which one was she again?
[Scene: Rachel and Monica's, Monica is watching the Civil War videos]
Monica: Oh my God!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Ross, and Rachel are there.]
(Monica is sarcastically amazed.)
Monica: Yay!
Monica: Oh, that is amazing!
Monica: What?
Monica: Are you crazy?!
Monica: Then get over yourself! Grow up!
Monica: Yeah, Ive had them picked out since I was fourteen.
Monica: Is it something youd be interested in?
Chandler: Because uh we-we we split up. Monica and I split up. Hold me.
Monica: Yeah, I do know.
MONICA: OK, wait, wait, wait, wait. You know what? Ross, let's - let's switch places. You get in the middle. No un-, ya know, unless this looks like we're trying to cover something up.
Monica: So ah, Phoebe, how was your date?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is getting ready for her first day.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Monica is cooking and Rachel is getting ready for a date with Joshua.]
Mrs. Geller: Not that old crow, my mother. (They stop and she kisses Monica on the cheek.) Congratulations darling.
Monica: Just out. Had some lunch, just me, little quality time with me. Thanks for your jacket.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica is outside the bathroom yelling at Ross who's in the bathroom.]
[Cut to Chandler, Joey, and Ross's apartment, Rachel enters and sneaks up to Chandler's bedroom where she overhears Chandler and Monica talking.]
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Joey are living here and Ross is writing on the Magna-Doodle when Rachel opens the door causing the door knob to hit his hand.]