words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Chandler enter, the others are sitting on the couch.]
Monica: Hey guys!
Monica: We need to talk to you about something.
Ross: (skeptical) That doesn't sound like you... That's Monica talking!
Monica: No, it's not!
Monica: Thank you, Pheebs!
Monica: What? You are way off, lady!
Monica: That's my favourite kind! Okay, we are doing this!
Monica: Hey, stay out of this, Chandler! This is between me... and ME!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Rachel and Monica are in there, and Phoebe enters]
Monica: You guys, I ordered some chocolate pies from that bakery on Bleecker. Could you pick them up for me?
Monica: No, no, no, I don't make chocolate pies. When I was younger I-I enter in this pie-eating contest. I ate so many that just the thought of them made me sick.
Monica: 2 minutes, 12 pies and a part of one tin! Okay, I see you guys at 4.
Monica: This dinner is gonna be so great! In your face, last year "me"!
(Monica leaves)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Chandler is watching TV and Monica is cooking]
Monica: (Chandler's laughing) Did someone drop the baton again?
Monica: (she tastes what she has cooked) I don't get older. I just get better!
Monica: You don't know that.
Monica: Yeah, but we haven't heard a thing from the adoption agency and it has been weeks!
Monica: Name one of his books.
Monica: Ok, let's see... uhm, okay, the turkey is in the oven, the stuffing is ready...
Monica: Oh, Chandler, that's sweet. But you don't have to do everything Doctor Phil tells you to do.
Monica: Ok, let's see... Oh, the cranberry sauce, it is easy to make and no-one really cares about it.
Monica: Okay, I'm gonna go check on something across the hall. You start by washing these (she gives Chandler a bowl with cranberries. Then, while she's going outside, she sees him with a bottle of soap in his hands) Not with soap!! (she leaves)
Chandler: Look, Monica has been working hard all day, she didn't wanna host this thing in the first place, we shouldn't go!
Monica: Where is everybody? They're forty-five minutes late!
Monica: Do you hear something? (Chandlers stands up and goes to the door to look out from the peephole)
Monica: Ohhh! Let me see! Oh God, I can't believe this! They're an hour late and they're just staying out there, talking!
Monica: (gasps) Oooh! They are in for a world of pain!
Monica: Oh! They're late and they're sloppy!
Phoebe: We're just... we're trying to figure out an excuse. Hey! Ooh! How about this: We can say that Monica told us 5 o'clock, not 4 o'clock. That way we're right on time! (Others start to agree but she continues) OR... or, we can plant PCP in the apartment and call the cops on her.
[cut to Monica and Chandler]
Monica: No! Everything's cold. The turkey's dried out and the... the stuffing is all soggy.
Chandler: Yeah, and there's a bowl of cranberry sauce that... (speaking lower to Monica) what happens to cranberry sauce?
Monica: (Rolling her eyes) Nothing. It's fine.
[cut to Monica and Chandler]
Monica: That's all the turkey you're gonna get.
Rachel: (gasps) Oh, I just remembered. We do have something to eat. Monica put something in our oven this morning.
[cut to Monica and Chandler]
Monica: Hey, you touch that and you will be sorry.
Chandler: Guys, I'd listen to her. The vein is bigger than I've ever seen it. (Monica looks at Chandler)
[cut to Monica and Chandler]
(Monica looks insulted)
Monica: Stinky?!
(Joey sticks his head through the gap. Monica and Chandler are now sitting at the dinner table. There is another smaller table full of food standing in front of the front door)
(Monica and Chandler do not look amused by Joeys head in the door)
(Monica is now smiling)
Monica: Oh! Enough! A monkey could have made 'em!
Joey: (still with his door wedged in the door gap, now opens his eyes wide and stares at Monica and Chandler as he did with Ross earlier in the hall) Hey listen guys, we feel really terrible.
Joey: Come on you guys, we want you to know we're (His eye widen even more) very very sorry. (Monica and Chandler are now covering their eyes with their hands) (then to the others in the hall) Right guys?
Monica: Yeah, they do seem to feel pretty bad.
Monica: (Gets up) Okay, okay. You two (to Phoebe and Rachel) go get the dessert. And I'll let you in.
Monica: Yeah, I asked you and Phoebe to pick up the pies. You did remember, right?
Phoebe: Pies, oh, we thought you said priiiize (goes to the hall and comes back with Emma's trophy in her hand). Here! (gives it to Monica).
(Monica takes it and reads the label)
Monica: Grand Supreme Little Darling?
Monica: Oh my God! YOU FORGOT THE PIES? Well, I cannot believe this. You force me to make dinner, then you're an hour late and you forget the one little thing that I asked you to do.
Monica: It's too late for apologies.
Monica: The three of us?
(Monica gasps and holds her forehead. Phoebe, Rachel and Ross pull back their heads)
Monica: Joey, that is not gonna work.
Monica: Alright, well, this does not change anything. (to Chandler) Okay, we need to get something to grease the sides of his face.
Monica: Bring it.
(Chandler gives Monica a footlong "eye dropper" with the turkey grease in it)
Monica: Here you go!
(And he starts licking the grease which trickles down his face. Monica also squirts some on the other side of his face, and his tongue follows her movements.)
Monica: Okay, try it.
Monica: Alright, we're gonna have to unscrew the chain.
Monica: Chandler, where are your tools?
Monica: I do, but Rachel borrowed them.
Monica: Oh!
Monica: Okay, I have to get that. Now when I get back, I want you and your friends to be gone. Thanksgiving is over. The Vein has spoken.
(Monica enters from the spare bedroom.)
Chandler: (to Monica) Look! Look! Look what the... Look what... Look what the floating heads did!
Monica: (very emotional) I don't care.
(Chandler can't believe what he's hearing. He looks at Monica, then at the others, then back at Monica.)
Monica: That was the adoption agency...
Monica: WE'RE GETTING A BABY!
Monica: There's a pregnant woman in Ohio, and she picked us!
Monica: This Thanksgiving kicks last Thanksgiving's ass!
Rachel: To Monica and Chandler... and that knocked up girl in Ohio.
Monica: I can't believe they called, and we're actually getting a baby. (she kisses Chandler)
(Monica and Chandler are looking curiously at Joey.)
Monica: (entering) Hi!
Monica: Chandler stole a twenty from my purse!
Monica: Yeah. Umm, Chandler can I talk to you outside for a second?
Monica: 300 dollars?!
Chandler: Monica. (Follows her out.)
[Scene: A hallway, Monica and Dan are talking.]
Monica: Maybe I could do it.
Monica: Hey.
Monica: I'm really getting tired of sneaking around.
Monica: Well, its getting late.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, its just Monica and Chandler dancing to Wonderful Tonight on the Slowhand album by Eric Clapton. And you can buy that album from the CFSI, just click on the CDNow link.]
Chandler: Very, very funny, but don't say things like that in front of Monica. I don't want you putting any ideas in her head.
Monica: What?
Monica: Hi.
Monica: Why, exactly?
Monica: Yeah, it did.
Monica: I'm afraid so.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel, Joey, and Chandler are there as Phoebe enters.]
Monica: Hey!
Monica: All right, were you guys smoking something in the back of our van?
Monica: I know, it's great!
Joey: (To Chandler) You?! (To Monica) And-and you?!
Rachel: Yes. Monica, you don't get it. It's bad enough that she's stolen the guy who might actually be the person that I am supposed to be with, but now, she's actually (starting to cry), but now she's actually stealing you.
Chandler: (excited) Guys, guys, I've got great news! Guess what Joey: Uh, ah, Monica's pregnant?! Monica: (shocked) Really? (She looks around, suddenly embarrassed) Let's get past the moment. Phoebe: What's your news? Chandler: Thank you. I got a job in advertising. (Everybody cheers) Monica: (hugging Chandler) Oh, honey, that's incredible! Phoebe: (inquisitive) Gosh, what's the pay like? (Everybody stares at her indignantly) Oh, come on people (defending) come on, now, if I don't know who makes the most, how do I know who I like the most! (She looks at Joey) Hey Joey! (Joey winks at her) Chandler: Actually, it pays nothing. It's an internship. Joey: Oh, that's cool. We have interns at 'Days Of Our Lives'. Chandler: Right. So, it'll be the same except less sex with you. (Joey nods) Ross: So, uh, what kinda stuff do you think they'll have you do there? Chandler: Well, it's a training program, but at the end, they hire the people they like. Phoebe: (enthusiastic) That's great. Chandler: Yeah, I mean, there's probably gonna be some ground work which will probably stink, you know, grown man getting people coffee is a little humiliating (At the same time, Gunther puts down a cup of coffee in front of Chandler) Chandler: (grinning awkwardly) Humiliating and noble! (Gunther shoots a nasty look at him while leaving) Ross: You know, if I didn't already have a job, I think, I would have been really good in advertising. Monica: Ross, you did not come up with "got milk?" Ross: Yes, I did, I did! (He turns to Joey, disappointed) I should have written it down!
Monica: What?!
Chandler and Monica: Okay.
Monica: Sorry.
Monica: (To Chandler) Rachel's at work.
Monica: Oh, I don't know. Maybe, um, "That was nice?" Admit something to me? "I'll call you?"
Monica: Hey, what's that?
MONICA: It's goin' great. Right on schedule. Got my little happy helpers.[everyone groans]
Monica: Urghh!!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica and Phoebe are going through a bunch of pictures as Chandler enters.]
Phoebe: Or maybe he-he was writing to tell her that-that hes changed his name, yknow? Tell Monica Im sorry.
Monica: What is that?
Monica: Now calm down Joey.
Monica: Uhm, she has been showing us houses outside of the city.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is still trying to get Ben to play with something other than the Barbi doll.]
Monica: See, didn't I tell you?! You're getting over Ross already!
Monica: Phoebe, I did not have sex.
Monica: But you live here! (Ross rolls his eyes.) You know that.
Chandler: Oh, come on Monica, reliving past pain and getting depressed is what Thanksgiving is all about. Y'know, for me anyway. And of course, the Indians.
[Scene: A restaurant, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Gary are on a double date. Chandler is yawning.]
Monica: Yes!
Monica: Yeah.
Monica: Hey!
Monica: I totally forgive you!
Monica: Wow! That guy is so rude!
Monica: I have no idea, but X-rays alone could be a couple hundred dollars.
Ross: So uh, where's Monica?
Monica: Thats a good idea! Wait, do you know how to waiter?
Monica: Hi, Chandler.
ROY: He'll be here OK, take a chill pill. [Chip pins Monica's corsage on, Monica then turns and whispers to Rachel]
Monica: OK, look. That is Aunt Iris. This woman has been playing poker since she was five. You gotta listen to every word she says. (opens door) Hi!
Monica: What-what's the matter? Is there, is there something on my dress? (She turns around making sure he gets a good look.)
Monica: And processing.
Paula: Honey.. you should always feel the thing. Listen, if that's how you feel about the guy, Monica, dump him!
Chandler: What?! (Monica kicks him in the shin.) Ow! (He gets out of bed and heads into the living room.)
Monica: Okay thats it. I give up. At mom and dads 40th anniversary, youre the one giving the speech.
(Monica and Chandler turn and stare at him.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are there. Phoebe is stressing out about something.]
Monica: Y'know what, I think we should play a game. I mean come on, its been twelve years.
Monica: Oh. I guess you can. Okay but; I-I have to return it, so you cant like it.
Monica: Mhm, helpful brother - creepy loner at teen movie.
(Monica pats Joey on the shoulder.)
(She starts to play her song, but is stopped by Monica.)
Mrs. Geller: Yes, yes Monica is thin. It's wonderful. But what we really want to hear about is Ross's new girlfriend.
Monica: You bet your ass, Im gonna fire you! Thank you.
Monica: How did that happen?
Monica: Oh my God! Fog him! Fog him!
Monica: Ooh, chocolates on the pillows! I love that!
Monica: Oh, sweetie. Oh, look at you. You're shivering.
Monica: So Chandler, I guess I'll see you at dinner.
(Monica and Rachel enter breathless.)
Rachel: Ohh, whoa God! Storage rooms give me the creeps! Monica, come on please hurry up honey! Please?
(And with that everyone starts playing tonsil hockey. Chandler with Monica, Ross with Phoebe, and Joey with Rachel.)
Monica: Larry?
Monica: Oh, Larry.
Monica: Okay, knock yourself out, Larry.
Monica: Thanks.
Monica: I love you. (They kiss.) Hey listen umm, when, when you were talkin about our future you said cat, but you meant dog right.
Monica: Wait a minute! (Quickly checks her pockets and pulls out ) My last Kit-Kat bar!
[Scene: Central Perk, Gunther is serving Monica and Rachel.]
Monica: Hmm?
Rachel: Thank you. (To Monica) Mon?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is doing a crossword puzzle.]
Monica: Ohh, fun!
Monica: So-so there is no party.
Monica: And you're not gonna do that.
Monica: I know. Thanks. (Chandler leaves)
(Joey leaves and Monica comes up for air.)
Monica: (quietly) Hi!
Monica: We're-we're really sorry we fogged you.
Monica: Oh, can I borrow this? (points to his milk) My milks gone bad.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is opening the door.]
Monica: You are?
Monica: Okay.
[Scene: The Restaurant, Monica and Chandlers and Richard and Lisas tables have been pushed together and theyre all eating and talking.]
Monica: Oh, thanks! We'll try to stop by.
Monica: Yeah! You already got the first class tickets; you got the lounge! I mean we should get free stuff too! I mean youre not the only ones on your honeymoon!