words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Chandler enter, the others are sitting on the couch.]
Monica: Hey guys!
Monica: We need to talk to you about something.
Ross: (skeptical) That doesn't sound like you... That's Monica talking!
Monica: No, it's not!
Monica: Thank you, Pheebs!
Monica: What? You are way off, lady!
Monica: That's my favourite kind! Okay, we are doing this!
Monica: Hey, stay out of this, Chandler! This is between me... and ME!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Rachel and Monica are in there, and Phoebe enters]
Monica: You guys, I ordered some chocolate pies from that bakery on Bleecker. Could you pick them up for me?
Monica: No, no, no, I don't make chocolate pies. When I was younger I-I enter in this pie-eating contest. I ate so many that just the thought of them made me sick.
Monica: 2 minutes, 12 pies and a part of one tin! Okay, I see you guys at 4.
Monica: This dinner is gonna be so great! In your face, last year "me"!
(Monica leaves)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Chandler is watching TV and Monica is cooking]
Monica: (Chandler's laughing) Did someone drop the baton again?
Monica: (she tastes what she has cooked) I don't get older. I just get better!
Monica: You don't know that.
Monica: Yeah, but we haven't heard a thing from the adoption agency and it has been weeks!
Monica: Name one of his books.
Monica: Ok, let's see... uhm, okay, the turkey is in the oven, the stuffing is ready...
Monica: Oh, Chandler, that's sweet. But you don't have to do everything Doctor Phil tells you to do.
Monica: Ok, let's see... Oh, the cranberry sauce, it is easy to make and no-one really cares about it.
Monica: Okay, I'm gonna go check on something across the hall. You start by washing these (she gives Chandler a bowl with cranberries. Then, while she's going outside, she sees him with a bottle of soap in his hands) Not with soap!! (she leaves)
Chandler: Look, Monica has been working hard all day, she didn't wanna host this thing in the first place, we shouldn't go!
Monica: Where is everybody? They're forty-five minutes late!
Monica: Do you hear something? (Chandlers stands up and goes to the door to look out from the peephole)
Monica: Ohhh! Let me see! Oh God, I can't believe this! They're an hour late and they're just staying out there, talking!
Monica: (gasps) Oooh! They are in for a world of pain!
Monica: Oh! They're late and they're sloppy!
Phoebe: We're just... we're trying to figure out an excuse. Hey! Ooh! How about this: We can say that Monica told us 5 o'clock, not 4 o'clock. That way we're right on time! (Others start to agree but she continues) OR... or, we can plant PCP in the apartment and call the cops on her.
[cut to Monica and Chandler]
Monica: No! Everything's cold. The turkey's dried out and the... the stuffing is all soggy.
Chandler: Yeah, and there's a bowl of cranberry sauce that... (speaking lower to Monica) what happens to cranberry sauce?
Monica: (Rolling her eyes) Nothing. It's fine.
[cut to Monica and Chandler]
Monica: That's all the turkey you're gonna get.
Rachel: (gasps) Oh, I just remembered. We do have something to eat. Monica put something in our oven this morning.
[cut to Monica and Chandler]
Monica: Hey, you touch that and you will be sorry.
Chandler: Guys, I'd listen to her. The vein is bigger than I've ever seen it. (Monica looks at Chandler)
[cut to Monica and Chandler]
(Monica looks insulted)
Monica: Stinky?!
(Joey sticks his head through the gap. Monica and Chandler are now sitting at the dinner table. There is another smaller table full of food standing in front of the front door)
(Monica and Chandler do not look amused by Joeys head in the door)
(Monica is now smiling)
Monica: Oh! Enough! A monkey could have made 'em!
Joey: (still with his door wedged in the door gap, now opens his eyes wide and stares at Monica and Chandler as he did with Ross earlier in the hall) Hey listen guys, we feel really terrible.
Joey: Come on you guys, we want you to know we're (His eye widen even more) very very sorry. (Monica and Chandler are now covering their eyes with their hands) (then to the others in the hall) Right guys?
Monica: Yeah, they do seem to feel pretty bad.
Monica: (Gets up) Okay, okay. You two (to Phoebe and Rachel) go get the dessert. And I'll let you in.
Monica: Yeah, I asked you and Phoebe to pick up the pies. You did remember, right?
Phoebe: Pies, oh, we thought you said priiiize (goes to the hall and comes back with Emma's trophy in her hand). Here! (gives it to Monica).
(Monica takes it and reads the label)
Monica: Grand Supreme Little Darling?
Monica: Oh my God! YOU FORGOT THE PIES? Well, I cannot believe this. You force me to make dinner, then you're an hour late and you forget the one little thing that I asked you to do.
Monica: It's too late for apologies.
Monica: The three of us?
(Monica gasps and holds her forehead. Phoebe, Rachel and Ross pull back their heads)
Monica: Joey, that is not gonna work.
Monica: Alright, well, this does not change anything. (to Chandler) Okay, we need to get something to grease the sides of his face.
Monica: Bring it.
(Chandler gives Monica a footlong "eye dropper" with the turkey grease in it)
Monica: Here you go!
(And he starts licking the grease which trickles down his face. Monica also squirts some on the other side of his face, and his tongue follows her movements.)
Monica: Okay, try it.
Monica: Alright, we're gonna have to unscrew the chain.
Monica: Chandler, where are your tools?
Monica: I do, but Rachel borrowed them.
Monica: Oh!
Monica: Okay, I have to get that. Now when I get back, I want you and your friends to be gone. Thanksgiving is over. The Vein has spoken.
(Monica enters from the spare bedroom.)
Chandler: (to Monica) Look! Look! Look what the... Look what... Look what the floating heads did!
Monica: (very emotional) I don't care.
(Chandler can't believe what he's hearing. He looks at Monica, then at the others, then back at Monica.)
Monica: That was the adoption agency...
Monica: WE'RE GETTING A BABY!
Monica: There's a pregnant woman in Ohio, and she picked us!
Monica: This Thanksgiving kicks last Thanksgiving's ass!
Rachel: To Monica and Chandler... and that knocked up girl in Ohio.
Monica: I can't believe they called, and we're actually getting a baby. (she kisses Chandler)
(Monica and Chandler are looking curiously at Joey.)
Rachel: Chandler, aren't you worried about what to get Monica for Christmas?
Monica: Hi.
Monica: Yeah, I'm sure your ex-wife will be more than happy to move to another country so you can patch things up with your new wife.
Monica: Ok.
Monica: (long pause) Ok.
Monica: When you were little you slept through the Grand(Pointing again)Oh fffff .
Monica: Yes... What is the end of that sentence?
Monica: There are no tickets on the nightstand!
Rachel: Uh, yeah. Uh, Monica, y'know, honey, I've been thinking about it and I've decided thisthis whole Ross thing, it's just not a good idea.
Phoebe: Yes, and Im sorry. I-I know things worked out for Chandler and Monica, but thats very rare.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, time lapse, Chandler is fully dressed and slowly walking out of the bedroom with a distressed look on his face.]
Monica: I got it.
Monica: Yeah, I guess.
Monica: Hi honey!
Monica: Oh, of course, it's so nice to see you again, Zack!
Monica: (turns around and she's quite shocked) Excuse me?
Monica: Chandler!
Monica: Chandler, this is crazy! What did you even say to him! "Come up, meet my wife! Give us your sperm"!
Monica: Uh!
Monica: Tell me about yourself, Zack!
Monica: Im fine-d. Im fine-d! Yknow, its a really hard word to say.
(Monica hears that and is suddenly very interested in Zack)
Monica: Hey, it was very moving! You're just heartless!
Monica: Hey guys! Dinner's ready!
Joey: (entering) Hey! Hey Chandler look, I know youre mad, but I just want to say Im sorry. I-I was a total jerk. Completely o-over the line. Uh, I just I hate pulp! Yknow? I mean, yknow how Monica feels about low fat mayonnaise?
Janine: (entering from her room) Monica! Chandler! Im really-really sorry about tonight. I dont know if Joey told you; I just couldnt get out of going to this play. Im sorry. Have a great time.
Monica & Chandler: Sure! Alright...
Monica: Hi, glad you could come.
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's]
Monica: (pause) No.
Monica: Does seem pretty perfect.
Monica: I'm sorry it's just, Phoebe just always thought you were, you were charming in a, in a sexless kind of way.
Monica: Hey, Joey, I dont think that you should leave Chandler alone. I mean its only been two days since he broke up with Kathy. Maybe you can go fishing next week?
Monica: Yeah, I'm sure.
Monica: I think I feel ok about it. Actually I think I feel really good about it.
Monica: That is so sweet. I love you. (they kiss)
Monica: Adoption.
Monica: So this is it, we're really gonna adopt?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang is there except for Rachel and Ross, who both come storming in. Rachel is still going off about Rosss secret marriage.]
Monica: Who did we fight in World War I?
Monica: (excitedly) Oh my God, we're gonna be parents!
Monica: Yes! Maybe its a false positive. Are you sure you peed on the stick right?
Monica: Hi! Umm, Im Monica Geller, Im the chef at Alessandros.
Chandler: (smiling, surprised) Oh yeah? (looks towards the kitchen, worried) Listen, don't tell Monica, she'll rip your heart right out.
Monica: (to Chandler) See?
Monica: At least you took me down with you!
Monica: I guess, in time.
Monica: What?! I thought hed love it! His favorite kid's book was the Velveteen Rabbit!
Monica: Ohmygod! Rat baby! Rat baby! Rat baby! (screams from another room)
Monica: Wait-wait!! Okay, stop it! Stop it! Stop! (Breaks it up.) Now listen, no ones gonna fight in this apartment.
Chandler: Okay. (Pause) You wont believe what Monicas older brother just said to me!
Monica: Im sorry. Im sorry. I-I should probably leave you girls alone. (She heads for the bedroom.)
[Scene: Back in New York, Monica and Chandler in Central Perk on the couch]
Monica: What? (looks very shocked) Why?
Chandler: Shhhhhhhhh!!! (Monica enters) Im sorry, I thought maybe Id make some warm milk and it would help me sleep.
(Rachel turns around and sees Chandler and Monica arriving)
(Monica and Chandler reach the group)
Monica: Yeah, right!
Monica: (to Chandler) Oh, honey, can you make sure we get a King size bed!
Monica: Ok!
Chandler: (slaps him on the shoulder) Nice! (goes to Monica)
Monica: (looking very serious) I need to talk to you.
Monica: Do you really think marrying someone else is the right answer?
Monica: What are you serious? You wanna marry him? Wha... What about Mike?
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's, Monica is pouring wine for her boyfriend, Dr. Roger.]
Monica: Alright heres something, it says to try holding the baby close to your body and then swing her rapidly from side to side.
Monica: Ok, Mike, enough is enough, now you love Phoebe and she loves you, so you need to get over your whole "I never want to get married" thing and step up!
Monica: (sarcastically) Well, I hope you're happy!
Monica: (to chandler) Twenty bucks says they're married within the month.
Monica: Phoebe is going to say "Yes" to David. See, that's what happens when you meddle in people's lives!
Monica: Who do you wanna fool around with?
Monica: Un, no you didn't! You must be mistaken!
Monica: Oh my God, he's gonna do it now. Please, I cannot watch this, let's go.
Monica: IT'S THE HUMIDITY!
Monica: The sun is out!
Monica: I know (she snuggles to him)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's room. Monica and Chandler are in bed.]
Monica: Damn it!
Monica: Yeah!
Rachel: All right! Well, uh... (to Monica) we're gonna hit the beach?
CHANDLER: Can I uh see something? (Takes Ben. When he puts him close to Monica, Ben cries. When he moves Ben away, he stops crying.)
Monica: Oh. (Holds on to it.) (To herself) Youre not gettin it.
Monica: (disappointed) Why not?
Monica: So, what are we gonna do today?
Monica: ... Phoebe...?
Monica: I'm not always that bad!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is eating the picnic as Rachel comes home from work.]
Monica: But then how do we know who wins?
Monica: Sure! Got to!
Monica: (smiling) OK!
Monica: (nearly shouting) One thousand...
Monica: Aww!
(Monica and Mike start to play ping pong. Mike scores)
(Monica rolls her eyes)
Monica: How much were you thinking?
Monica: Hell, yeah!
Monica: Ha! My point!
Phoebe: (picks up a coin from her bra) Monica, you call it.
RACHEL: [to Monica at the counter] Ooh, Julie's so smart, Julie's so special.
Monica: (from her bedroom) Okay! Ill be right out. Im slipping into something a little less comfortable, and a little more slutty.