words in movies
PHOEBE: Not especially. But you know what, I think they had pot in them.
ROSS: Yeah, but not very well, unless 14-across, 'Gershwin musical' actually is bitemebitemebitemebiteme.
ROSS: Hey Rach. I, uh, got you a little present. [Rachel is not impressed]. . I'll open it. It's a Slinky! Remember, huh. [sings] Walks down stairs, alone or in pairs, everyone knows it's. . . just a big spring. Alright, you still mad at me becuase of the whole. . .
RACHEL: Horrible and degrading list of reasons not to be with me?
PHOEBE: It's not a blue screen... it's just, maybe it was just really clear that day. OK, I have to talk to my grandmother. [turns to leave]
GRANDMOTHER: Alright, that is not your father, that's just a picture of a guy in a frame.
GRANDMOTHER: It was your mother's idea. Ya know, she didn't want you to know your real father because it hurt her so much when he left, and, I didn't want to go along with it, but, well then she died and, and it was harder to argue with her. Not impossible, but harder.
PHOEBE: Alright, so, what, he's not a famous tree surgeon? And then, I guess, OK, he doesn't live in a hut in Burma where there's no phones?
ROSS: Hey, Rach, you know what? I think, I think I know what'll make you feel better. How 'bout you make a list about me. RACHEL: Wha... forget it Ross, no, I am not gonna stand here and make a list of. . . ROSS: C'mon Rachel. RACHEL: OK, you're whiney, you are, you're obsessive, you are insecure, you're, you're gutless, you know, you don't ever, you don't just sort of seize the day, you know. You like me for what, a year, you didn't do anything about it. And, uh, oh, you wear too much of that gel in your hair. ROSS: See there, you uhh, alright, ya, you did what I said. RACHEL: Yeah, and you know what? You're right, I do feel better, thank you Ross. [she walks off and Ross puts his hand to his hair] [Scene: Back at Phoebe's. She is on the phone] PHOEBE: Yeah, um, in Albany, can I have the number of Frank Buffay. . . OK, um, in Ithica. . . alright, um, Saratoga. . . Oneonta. Alright, you know what, you shouldn't call youself information. [hangs up] [Phoebe's grandmother enters] GRANDMOTHER: Hey. PHOEBE: Hello grandma, if that is in fact your real name. GRANDMOTHER: C'mon now Phoe, don't still be mad at me. How's it going? PHOEBE: Well, not so good. Upstate's pretty big, he's pretty small, you do the math. GRANDMOTHER: Well, I think you're better off without him. Oh honey, I know he's your daddy but, but to me he's still the irresponsible creep who knocked up your mom and stole her Gremlin. PHOEBE: No I just, just wanted to know who he was, ya know. GRANDMOTHER: I know. OK, I wasn't completely honest with you when I told you that, uh, I didn't know exactly where he lived. PHOEBE: Whattaya mean? GRANDMOTHER: He lives at 74 Laurel Drive in Middletown. If you hit the Dairy Queen, you've gone too far. You can take my cab. PHOEBE: Wow. Thank you. GRANDMOTHER: Now, remember, nobody else drives that cab. PHOEBE: Uh-huh, got it. Ooh, I'm gonna see my dad. Wish me luck, Grandpa! [blows a kiss to a picture of Einstein]
MONICA: For the sixteenth time, no... I do not think you're obsessive.
MONICA: Hey, it's Funny's cousin, Not Funny.
MONICA: No, if he doesn't like our cookies, too bad, I am not gonna be blackmailed. Look if worse comes to worse, it gets a little warm, we'll call it a theme party.
ROSS: Alright, alright, here's the chance. Monica give him cash, Rachel give him your earrings. Something, now, anything. MONICA: No, I will not cave. RACHEL: Yeah, I'm with Mon. ROSS: Alright, alright, you know how you say I never seize the day? Well, alright, even though he's your super, I'm seizing. [approaches Mr. Treeger] Mr. Treeger, here is 50 bucks, merry Christmas. [Gives him the cash.]
MR. TREEGER: No, the place is not open 'till Tuesday. Am I not saying it right.
CHANDLER: Well, so why not go knock?
PHOEBE: Well, 'cause, I mean, what if, what if he's not this great dad guy? I mean, what if, what if he's just still the dirtbag who ran out on my mom and us? You know what? I've already lost a fake dad this week and I don't think I'm ready to lose a real one.
JOEY: Uh, listen Phoebs, I know you're not goin' in there but do you think it'd be alright if I went in and used his bathroom? Oh, that's fine, never mind. Cool, snow, kinda like a blank canvas.
CHANDLER: And last but not least.
Chandler: Now, its not wrapped because I just, just finished it.
Joey: Oh no, not you too!
Ross: Unreasonable? How about we have this conversation when one of you guys gets married! You have no idea what it takes to make a marriage work! All right, it's about compromise! Do you always like it? No! Do you do it? Yes! Because it's not all laughing, happy, candy in the sky, drinking coffee at Central Perk all the time! It's real life, okay? It's what grown-ups do! (He storms out.)
Joey: Ross, you should know that my pants are startin to come down and Im not wearing any underwear!
Phoebe: Thats not why youre going! Youre going because you hope hes gonna say, "Yeah, I love you too, Rach. Forget that British chippy."
Joey: (not impressed) Wow!!
Chandler: That's not specific to girls.
Chandler: No not okay, you cant look for Monicas presents!
Rachel: Are you joking? Check out is not til noon and he has a good (checks her watch) eleven minutes left.
Chandler: Hey, you have to forget about Elizabeth. I mean if youre not careful you may not get married at all this year!
Ross: Kay, first of all, this attitude is not helping.
Phoebe: Oh thats not so bad.
Rachel: Well, he didnt say, but it was a fire. Im guessing not very good. Come on, we gotta go!
Ross: Ah, well, it means that I can sell cookies, but Im not invited to sleep-overs.
Joey: (To Rachel) Did I not just tell him?
Ross: Carol our sex life isits just not working
Monica: Well, youre not.
Phoebe: Oh, you're not going? (Fake disappointed voice) Oh, why?
Rachel: What? Maybe I put it in here (she opens her bag). Oh, oh, it's not in there! Oh, no! I must have packed it in one of these boxes!
Joey: Well, first it's not a purse.
Monica: Stop it!! Thats not funny!!
RACHEL: That is not a tattoo, that is a nothing. I finally got her back in the chair, bairly touched her with a needle, she jumped up screaming, and that was it.
Joey: Okay, maybe hes not his best friend, but
Chandler: Get in here! (They head for the door and Chandler sees Smokes-A-Lot Lady standing next to the door and smoking, to her) Hey, and you can not smoke in here! (Takes the cigarette and takes a drag for himself.) (Exhaling in ecstasy) Merry Christmas.
Joey: No! No! No, not after seeing that.
Joey: (entering) Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!! None of that, not while you're living under my roof!
Monica: Its not mayonnaise!!
JOEY: Oh we're not out. No, no. We're just uh, two heterosexual guys, hanging with the son of our other heterosexual friend, doin' the usual straight guy stuff.
Joey: Not the other one?
JOEY: [sings] It may not be a bed of roses.
Chandler: Then we will sprinkle rose pedals on the bed and make love. Not just because its romantic, but because I can!
Joey: Uh, well he did not get sick somewhere in there and it was immediately found and properly cleaned up!
Monica: I am not high maintenance!
Rachel: Ohh, so do you! Did you lose weight? (Shes not quite sure of that one.)
Joey: (not quite sure of how to answer that) Well uh, look Ross I uh, I think Carols great and Im sure youre a very attractive man, but I .
Phoebe: Not yet. Umm, I heard they really hurt, do they hurt?
RACHEL: I can not believe I have to walk down the aisle in front of 200 people looking like something you drink when your nauseous.
Monica: I mean I have not been picked on this much since kindergarten and they had to bring in someone from junior high to do the see-saw with me. (Joey laughs and Monica glares at him.)
Rachel: What? Im not you. This may be the only wedding I ever have. I want it to be amazing.
Joey: Hey, you're not Kip!
Joey: Uhhhh.... he's not even wearing a jockstrap!
Ross: Why not?
Monica: Well, Id like to but, (extremely quietly) Im not sure we have time to go.
Chandler: Not really.
Ross: Wait! No! Ben, come here! I am not kidding!
Russell: And well need to have witnesses who can testify that you were not of uh, sound mind.
Ross: Its not something you are! Its something you have!
Joey: Thats right! And what are you not gonna do?
The Doctor: But, youre not identical twins.
Kathy: Oh. Well uh, (to Chandler) you not being able to talk may make this easier. Listen umm (She looks at the gang who are watching, they take the hint and leave them alone.) Listen I dont wanna be someone who comes between two best friends. I just, I cant stand seeing what this is doing to you guys, and I dont wanna be the cause of that. So, I dont think we can see each other anymore. Im gonna go to my moms in Chicago, Im gonna stay there for awhile. I think this couldve be something really amazing, but yknow this is probably for the best. Yknow? Im gonna miss you. Good-bye, Chandler.
Chandler: Tell it again. (pause, we see Rachel is not amused.) Seriously.
Joey: Tell me about it, huh? (Realizes that she can see Monica.) Oh no-no-no, I'm not with her, she's just Monica! (He pantomimes that out.) Ewwuck! (He pushes Monica away and makes a disgusted face.)
Monica: (not buying it) Uh-huh.
Monica: That's not possible!
Ross: Rachel! Well, you-youre not at home, youre-youre-youre right here.
Ross: Well, apparently not, and I cant just stand by and watch two people I care about very much be hurt over something that is so silly. I mean, enough of the silliness!
Monica: Oh well, its not so bad.
Joey: It's not right what Emily wants you to do! She is totally-(The gang enters behind Joey and Phoebe pinches him again.)-Owww!! Stop pinching me! Look, now you guys said I only had to keep my mouth shut as long as Ross was happy, right? Well he just told me that he's not entirely happy.
Dina: And youre my big brother! I mean, youre my favorite guy in the whole world. Im not even scared to tell mom and dad. I was scared of telling you.
Chandler: Not once!
Chandler: Oh no-no-no, thats notNo-no-no!
Carl: Well, Im not gonna talk because
Rachel: Oh thanks, but listen, I was just at Monicas and she and Chandler had a big fight and theyre not moving in.
Chandler: Look, we're not just messing around! I love her. Okay, I'm in love with her.
Joey's Hand Twin: You can't sit here if you're not gonna play.
Elizabeth: Do you not want to be seen with me?
Elizabeth: Oh, were not together.
Phoebe: Maybe your resolution is to not make fun of your friends, especially the ones who may soon be flying you to Europe for free on their own plane.
Rachel: Oh, its a tattoo! Thats weird, Phoebe doesnt Wait thats Ursula! Thats not Phoebe that is Ursula!
Ross: Well, actually its been great. Shes 20 so shes not looking for anything too serious, which is perfect for me right now.
Monica: Youre not supposed to look!
Chandler: I'll try, but I'm not sure what good it would do, y'know? Because I'm a lot less afraid of commitment than I used to be.
Rachel: Ross, shes not weird, she just wants her stuff to be one of a kind.
Ross: Unless (Rachel groans.) You anticipated that I would figure all this out and you know that it actually is a girl, and you really do want her to be named Ruth! Well, Im not falling for that! Okay? Ruth is off the table!
Rachel: Oh. Oh yeah, dont get to worked up over it. I mean it-it sounds like hes a doctor, but hes not.
Ross: Hey, yknow what? Not all spring breaks are like that.
Monica: Drunk enough to know that I want to do this. Not so drunk that you should feel guilty about taking advantage.
Ross: Do not give him any money!
Ross: Look, face it, my father is not going to pay for the build-in barbecue and believe me you can kiss you gazebo goodbye. Now I might be able to get you the new lawn.
Sebastian: Uh, no not really. Why?
Chandler: Im not great at the advice, can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? Some cheese?
Chandler: Well, why does she not want to hang out with us?!
Chandler: Just tell her the truth! Tell her youre not ready.
[Scene: A blackjack table, it's the same one Joey's hand twin was working at, only he's not there anymore and has been replaced by a beautiful woman.]
Chandler: I believe the foundation of our friendship was unfortunate hair. (Ross just stares at him) All right, look, if we're really gonna do this... it's not like you never broke one of the pacts.
Ross: Im not going to do that. (Rachel glares at him.)
Monica: Hes great! I mean we have such a good time together! Hes so funny, and sooo sweet, and Im not attracted to him at all!!
Chandler: Yeah, but its not who I am. Everything they said was exaclty why I was worried about having a kid. And its true. And look everybody knows it.
Joey: Not anymore. So anyway, how do you want to pay me?
Ross: Okay, I did not abandon Rachel! Okay? Emily showed up at the airport! I had to go after her! I mean, I-I did what I had to do! She's my wife! Rachel is my wife! Y'knowEmily! Emily, is my wife! Man, what is that?
Joey: No youre not! Not to me!
Chandler: Oh come on guys, its not like I moved to Europe! I just moved across the hall! And we would have you over all the time if it werent for (struggles to get this out) Monicas allergies. (The duck quacks.) Youre right, I could never lie to you. She hates you. (The phone rings.) Should I get that? (Laughs, then answers the phone.) Hello? (Listens) Uh no, Joeys not here right now. Can I take a message? (Listens) Yeah, okay so the audition has been moved from 5:00 to 2:30? (Listens) Okay great. (Listens.) Bye. (Hangs up the phone and goes to write the message on the Magna-Doodle on the door but Monica walks in and forces him to jump out of the way.)
Chandler: Well, you know what they say, elephants never forget. (Monica is not amused by that statement.) Seriously, good luck marrying me.
Ross: Theres nothing the matter with me. See, Im not completely devoid of sentiment, see I have feelings.
Phoebe: It's not that bad.
Cop: Okay, so since umm, you're not going to jail tonight I was wondering if you would like to go to dinner with me?
Rachel: I did not sell you out.
Rachel: No! No I, no Ross is not a geek!
Monica: Not just the phone pen. I never get my messages.
Monica: No, its okay, not only did I get to go out with Chip Matthews, I got to dump Chip Matthews.