words in movies
Monica: Oh my God!
Joey: Oh sorry, I hear divorce I immediately go to Ross. (To Rachel) Who-whos Barry and Mindy?
All: (simultaneously) Oh yeah! Come on! Yeah right!
{Transcribers note: This is where the opening credits are, but theyre not the usual opening credits. Oh no! These credits are based on the world that would have been created had all of the above actually happened. It starts out with all of them at the fountain sitting on the couch as Fat Monica runs up and sits on the arm of the couch, tilting the whole thing towards her. It then goes on to show Rachels still a shop-aholic and with Barry. Fat Monica is sweating while cooking and dancing while eating a donut. Phoebe as the Wall Street shark smoking while on two cell phones. Then theyre dancing in the fountain. Joey entering as Dr. Drake Remoray and meeting a groupie. Chandler trying to write as a bird does its business on his shoulder and falling asleep while typing. Ross doing some kara-tay and trying to get Carol into bed. And finally, some more dancing in the fountain, them all flexing, and the turning out the lamp and shutting off all the lights bit from the first season. Just remember one thing, this is an alternate universe. Everything from every other episode doesnt apply, for instance, Ross and Rachel have no history. And in fact have not seen each other in years in this world.}
Ross: (recognizing her) Oh my God! Rachel Green?
Rachel: Oh, Im sorry. Ross Tillman.
Rachel: Oh, its the best! (They both exhale contemplating the joys of marriage.) So, umm hows Monica?
Ross: Oh really, really great! Yeah! A-actually shes right down the street, umm, do-do you know what? You should stop bye and say hi.
Rachel: Oh wait, dont you have to pay for your, (looks at his magazine) Busty Ladies?
Rachel: (laughs) Oh yeah? Okay.
Joey: Oh dear God, let me think. (Starts to sarcastically think about it.)
Monica: Oh no! Whats the matter?
Chandler: Oh I just got another rejection letter. They said my writing was funny, just not "Archie Comic funny."
Monica's Boyfriend: Bye-bye. (Gets up to leave.) Oh uh, by the way, the answer is, the Brazil nut. (Exits.)
Joey: Oh right great! Welcome aboard!
Phoebe: Ohh thats so sweet! (Her cell phone rings.) Oh! Hang on! (Quickly grabs a cigarette and starts to light it as her phone rings.) Hang onnnnnn!!! (Gets the cigarette lighted and answers the phone.) (On phone.) Go!! No! No-no! I said sell when it hits 50! 5-0, its a number! It comes after 4-9!! No, its okay. Its okay, youre allowed one mistake. Just kidding, you are of course fired.
Monica: (gets up and gasps) Oh my God! Rachel!! (Rachel is stunned to see that her long lost friend is still fat.) (Monica goes over and gives Rachel a big bear hug, which is quite easy for her.) You look terrific!
Rachel: Oh yeah.
Monica: Oh my God, sit down! Sit down! How long as it been since weve seen each other?
Rachel: Oh yeah. Right. So now, aredo you, do you still do music?
Rachel: (interrupting him and seeing Joey) Oh my God! Joey Tribbiani from Days of Our Lives, just walked in here!
Phoebe: Hang on! Hang on! Hang on! (Answering the phone.) Go!! Whos this? (Listens) Oh okay, youre gonna like working for me. Whats your name? (Listens) What kind of name is Brendy? I Whatever Stop talking! All right, from now on your name is Joan. You can pick your own last name.
Monica: (panicked) Oh wait! You didnt just sit on my Kit-Kats did you?!!
Phoebe: (louder) My chest hurts! Oh, and now I-I cant breathe.
Phoebe: Oh, if I were, would-would I have shooting pains up and down my left arm?
Monica: Oh my God!
Phoebe: Oh thats not so bad.
Ross: Oh.
Chandler: Oh just great. He beeps me now with codes. One is, "Bring me food." Two is, "Im with a girl, bring us food." Three is, "Im lost and I cant find food."
Joey: Oh great. (Starts to go in.) (To Chandler) Hey! Go take off those pants, they look ready!
Joey: Oh my God, Im sorry, Im being so rude. (Turns to Rachel.) Rachel, would like a soda or something? Because Chandler would run right out and get it.
Monica: Oh my God! Thats great! Oh wow! (Hugs him.) Youre a published writer! I wish I had a present for you!
Joey: Oh my God! Thats great! Congratulations! Whats the story?!
Chandler: Oh you wouldnt uh, care. Its just a stupid comic book story.
Rachel: Oh Mon, listen I have to ask! Okay, Joey Tribbiani invited me back to his apartment, now does he do this with a lot of girls?
Rachel: Ohh! And Im one of them!! Wow! Oh, I just cannot believe this! I mean, Joey Tribbiani!
Rachel: Yeah. Oh I just wish we could not be married for a little bit! Yknow I just wish we could be like on a break!
Rachel: Oh, its so easy for you I mean, youre not married, you get to have sex with who ever you want!
Rachel: Oh my God! Youre a 30 year old virgin!
Rachel: Oh my God!! Do it!! Honey, youve waited long enough!!
Rachel: Oh what do you know? Virgin!
Phoebe: Oh yeah, the doctor said that could be one of the side effects.
Phoebe: Oh, give it to me.
Ross: (on the phone) Hello? (Listens.) No she cant come to the phone right now. (Listens.) Oh, right no problem. Okay, bye-bye. (Hangs up.)
Rachel: (very relived) Oh! Thank God!
Hope: Oh Drake.
Ross: Oh. (He takes the notepad she was using and looks at it.) Wow! (Flips to another page.) Huh. (Flips another page.) Boy! (Flips another page.) Well, someones been doing their homework. (Flips two more pages.)
Ross: Oh, I know. (Laughs) Yknow, just-just talking about it is getting me kinda
Carol: Oh, me too.
Carol: Oh umm, yknow I think it would be better if we just save it.
Rachel: Pat the dog. Oh! Oh! I get it!! (Laughs and finishes her drink.)
Rachel: Oh, I probably shouldntso I will! (Joey starts making her refill and Rachel notices that rain thing Joey has.) Oh! Wow! Its like its raining!
Susan: Oh, I wouldnt miss it for the world.
Chandler: With Roger? (Monica shyly looks away.) Not just with Roger?! (Monica shrugs.) Oh my God!
Monica: Oh really? When? Do you wanna do it with me?
Monica: I have no moves. (He moves in to kiss her and she laughs and backs away.) Okay, whatcha doin there?! (Giggles.) Oh yknow what? Im sorry, this is just too weird.
Chandler: Oh yeah.
Chandler: Oh my God!
Chandler: Oh, okay! (He rolls over to do that again.)
Rachel: (wakes up suddenly and realizes where she is) Oh right.
Rachel: (groans) Oh God. Oh I cant believe Joey Tribbiani heard me throw up!
Rachel: Noo! Oh God we didwe didnt, we didnt uhh
Rachel: (seeing the ring and gasping) Oh my God, they let you keep that stuff?!
Ross: Oh I a lot of stuff!
Chandler: Let me tell you about this chick I scored with last night! Oh no wait a minute that was you!
Monica: Oh I cant. Dr. Roger is coming over again.
Chandler: Oh. Oh right! Right! Because youre still seeing him and uh, hes a good guy. I mean, I remember a time when (He fakes falling asleep.)
Chandler: Oh yeah! Yeah! Dont worry about me, Ill be fine! (Does a kara-tay move.)
Rachel: Oh thats right! Im sorry! I-I am early! Finish! Please!!
Phoebe: Oh, okay I didnt get that message. So this doesnt countAnyway, Ill be in my office.
Phoebe: Oh, so this is all about money! Yknow its bad enough thatOw! Oh, you have got to be kidding!
Rachel: Oh. (Doesnt believe it.)
Ross: She is not (Realizes) Shes gay. Oh my God. She is so gay! I cant believe this.
Chandler: Oh yeah.
Chandler: That's right, each. Oh, and a uh Rob Roy. (to Janice) I've always wanted to know...
Rachel: Oh! Ow! (Joey motions, "You see what I mean?!")
Ross: Oh yeah, I'm sure he's gonna give you a job. Maybe make you his SEXretary.
Joey: (looking at the checkbook) Wow! Look at this! He wrote a check for 50,000 dollars to Hugo Ligrens Ring Design. (Monica is stunned) Oh, sorry, what do you think the good news is?
Phoebe: Wait! Oh wait! (she takes off a ring that was already on her left ring finger. After that Mike starts to kneel again, but then...) Oh no! (She was wearing rings on all her fingers and her thumb, and takes all of these off.)
Phoebe: Oh Joey, you bummed him out! This was the happiest dog in the world, and he spends half a day with you, and look at him!
Rachel: So? You guys are all sleep deprived. I dont see you weeping because you put your slippers on the wrong feet. Oh God. (Starts to cry harder.)
Joey: Thats always appropriate! (Back to the matter at hand) Oh, okay. One more push! One more push!
RACHEL: Oh God. Ross, OK, if you care about me at all, you will get the pie out of the man's hood.
Joey: All rightoh! Listen, I know this is your party, but Id really like to the number of museum geeks that are gonna be there.
Rachel: I am? Oh, look at that, yes I am. Enough about me, enough about me, Mr. Back from the Orient. Come on. I wanna hear everything! Everything. (Looks at Julie)
Chandler: Oh no-no-no, no. No, no, no, I just, I just need a pretend ticket.
Guy: Oh believe me, I-I-Ive been there. I had to sort mannequin heads at that Mannequins Plus.
Monica: Oh I love taking limos when nobody died!
Ross: Oh. Yeah. (Sarcastically) Uh Chandler let me win. No, Chandlers really strong. Oh my arm is so sore. Oh nurse! (Waddles over to Mona.)
Phoebe: Oh, okay that explains it. I got a call at two in the morning, but all I could hear was, like, this high squeaky sound, so I thought okay its like a mouse or a opossum. But then I realized where would a mouse or a opossum get the money to make the phone call.
Monica: Oh, now you want a pad.
Joey: (in a baby voice) Oh no, were you upset? Did you lose sleep?
Monica: That's Paul's watch. You just put it back where you found it. Oh boy. Alright. Goodnight, everybody.
Joey: Oh, its a new TV show. Yeah. Im up for the part of Mac Macaveli or "Mac." Yeah, Im a detective and I solve crimes with the help of my robot partner. Hes a, hes a Computerized Humanoid Electronically Enhanced Secret Enforcer or-or "C.H.E.E.S.E."
RACHEL: Oh my God this is sooo humiliating. I think the only thing that tops that was, was, was when I was in the eight grade and I had to sing the Copa Cabana in front of the entire school. I think I got about two lines into it before I ran and freaked out. Oh my God, my entire life is flashing before my eyes.
Chandler: Oh hey! There's some kids playing in the street, you wanna go down there and give them a project, ruin their day?
Ross: Oh my God! Im sorry, I was talking to this nurse, completely forgot.
JOEY: Oh hey uh, be careful with that 3-D last supper, Judas is a little loose.
Kim: Oh sure, every Sunday night I'm telling myself I'm quitting but every Monday morning it's like (Mimics chain smoking.)
Phoebe: Oh, come on! Yes, remember that time on the frozen lake? We were playing chess, you said I was boring, and then you took off your energy mask and you were Cameron Diaz! (Realizes) Okay, there's a chance this may have been a dream.
Chandler: Oh uh-uh, no-no-no-no-uh-uh. (He starts laughing, causing everyone else to laugh.)
Rachel: Oh great, the pacifiers?
Monica: Oh, honey, the earrings
Joey: Oh, .. uh... uh... pass. (Next word: "Rotunda") Pass. (Next word: "Filibuster" stares at it a moment) Pass. (Henrietta is looking very confused) (Next word: "Addendum" 4 seconds remaining) Okay, the little thing that hangs down at the back of your throat.
Cecilia: Right. Hes not angry at the room either. Try it again, he owns it! He owns the room. It is his. He owns, owns, owns, owns the room! He owns it!! (Joey gets a snooty look on his face.) All right, its a little weird, but its getting better. (Joey is pleased.) Oh well, Im gonna miss this woman so much. I dont know what Im going to do! I mean, its been 20 years of my life.
Phoebe: Ohh! (She moves.) Oh my. Oh, that reminds me, I have to see my OB-GYN today.
Joey: Because its all tainted with your betrayal. From now on this apartment is empty for me! And Im not happy about you either. (The bread maker dings) Oh, and just so you know, I made that bread for you. (Joey walks into his bedroom and slams the door.)
ROSS: I've no idea, could be. Listen, I'm sorry I had to work tonight. RACHEL: Oh it's OK. You were worth the wait, and I don't just mean tonight. [they kiss] ROSS: You're not laughing. RACHEL: This time it's not so funny. [They kiss and start undressing. As Rachel tries to pull off Ross's tie she catches it in his mouth. Then they roll across the fur rug.] RACHEL: Ah, oh God. Oh, honey, oh that's OK. ROSS: What. Oh no, you just rolled over the juice box. RACHEL: Oh, thank God. [Scene: Museum of Natural History. The next morning Rachel and Ross are sleeping in the display under a fur.] ROSS: Hi. RACHEL: Hi you. I can't believe I'm waking up next to you. ROSS: I know it is pretty unbelievaaaaah. RACHEL: What? ROSS: We're not alone. [A church youth group is outside the display watching them] CLOSING CREDITS [Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. They are still in their chairs, watching Beavis and Butthead.] [they're laughing along with the show when an alarm goes off] JOEY: Is that the fire alarm? CHANDLER: Yeah. [feels the floor] Oh it's not warm yet, we still have time. JOEY: Cool.
Charlie: Oh, Newcastle disease is a secretion borne virus that only affects chickens and... other poultry.
Ross: Oh, guys, you should've seen him. 'Read 'em and weep.'
Ross: Oh! (Recoils in horror.)
Rachel: Oh that's so great, now Emma has two Hugsy's.
Ross: (speaking without pause, agitated) Oh yeah? Yeah? I wonder why? What could that smarmy letch possibly want?
Joey: It is me! It's a musical version of Tale of Two Cities. So I think I'm gonna sing New York, New York, and ah, oh I left My Heart in San Francisco.
PHOEBE: Oh, oh, OK, so everyone, pretend like I'm telling you a story, OK. And, and it's really funny. So everyone just laugh, now.
Chandler: Oh, thanks! I'm... actually thinking about becoming a motivational speaker.
Monica: (staggered) Oh God.
Ross: 'Pwease, Aunt Monica, pwease?' Oh, unclench. You're not even gonna be there.
Danny: Oh hey, great, you're up. Rachel, this is my sister Krista. Krista, this is Rachel.
(Monica enters, but she forgot something. Oh, about 150 pounds. In other words, she lost weight, big time!)
Joey: Oh, come on! Last night I was finishing off a pizza and she said (aping Amy badly) "Uoh oh oh, a moment on the lips, forever on the hips!" I don’t need that kind of talk in my house!
Joey: Oh uh, me and Ross can be the judges.
Megan: Oh, thanks for the tip.
Mike: Oh, no! I don't think so! You know, according to standard table tennis rules if at any time a player uses his non racket bearing hand to touch the playing surface he or she forfeits the point.
RUSS: Oh, you are the, uh... paleontologist.
Rachel: You're right! I mean you're right! It wasn't just the Weebles, but it was the Weeble Play Palace, and and the Weebles' Cruise Ship. Oh, which had this little lifeboat for the Weebles to wobble in.
Phoebe: Oh, I love you guys too, but Mike got off work early. Wait. Wait, I�m not t�not that kind of girl that just ditches her friends to be with her boyfriend. You know what? I am. Bye guys! (waves to the bar) Judy! Bye.
Phoebe: Oh my God!! (She grabs Rachels hand and drags her towards Monica.) Excuse me! Excuse me! (Shes knocking women and veils out of the way as she moves.)
Monica: Oh no, I already packed. The only thing I couldnt find though was your Speedo.
Chandler: (incredulous) I dont know what thats like?! Up until I was 25 I thought the only response to, "I love you," was, "Oh crap!"
Joey: Oh comelook, when I was a kid my dads company gave season tickets to the number one salesman every year, all right? My dad never won! Of course, he wasnt in the sales division, but still, I never ever, ever forgot that!
Monica: (Interrupting) Oh, what about that guy over there? (She points at another guy and Gunther is deflated.) Remember? That is the guy you flirted with at the counter that time.
Joey: Oh, oh! Any chance any of this happened in a "Galaxy far, far away"? (Ross turns aroud and glares at him. Joey and Rachel decide to leave).
Chandler: Oh, listen. If this is about those prank memos, I had nothing to do with them. Really. Nothing at all. Really. (Chandler tries to hide a rubber chicken from the woman.) Nothing.
Joey: Oh, Kath, we should get going. We're going to by hamsters.
Barry: Oh God... (Into intercom) I'll be right there, Bernice. (to Mindy) Look, please, please don't go anywhere, okay? I'll be, I'll be right back.
PHOEBE: Uh-huh, let's go. (they move in to kiss) Oh, wait I have gum. Okay. (they kiss rather passionately) Good, very good, firm but tender. I'd recommend you to a friend.
Monica: Oh, I so can't believe this! My uterus is an inhospitable environment? I was trying so hard to be a good hostess!
Joey: Oh, and Mississ-Pete is?
Ross: Oh, but he will. He still tells the story how Monica tried to escape from fat camp.
David: (disappointed) Oh. Uh, what?
Ross: Oh. Listen, do you think- and try not to let my intense vulnerability become any kind of a factor here- but do you think it would be okay if I asked you out? Sometime? Maybe?
Rachel: (Tearfully) Ross, I'm doing everything that I can, I've got everybody looking for him, and I- (Door buzzer goes and she runs to get it) Oh! Who is it?
Rachel: Yeah, totally! You are in such good hands. And I'm so good with meeting parents. With the father, you know, you want to flirt a little bit, but not in a gross way. Just kind of like: "Oh mr. Pincer, I can see where Wallis gets his good looks..."
Ross: Oh well, it sounds to me like your family is ready to uh, rediscover its Scottish roots.
Chandler: Oh, beautiful? Really? Beautiful? You think this is beautiful? (picks up the remote and presses a button, and he immediately makes a face that just looks like hes going to throw up!)
Chandler: Thanks for trying. (grabs the ticket and starts to leave) Oh, and by the way there is no Count Rushmore!
Ross: Wha? Oh, come on. You didnt have tosaltwater taffy?! (Mona laughs) Thanks! This is interesting. You know, most people think this is made with sea water, but its actually made with, uh, salted fresh water. Thats not interesting.
Phoebe: Ooh! I know what you could make! (runs over to join Monica and Rachel in the kitchen) I know! Oh, you should definitely make that thing... you know, with the stuff? (Monica doesn't know.) You know, that thing... with the stuff...? OK, I don't know. (sits down)
Chandler: Oh yeah! I mean at first I hated it, but why wouldn't I, because as a man I've been trained (bitter woman's tone) not to listen! (pause) But after chapter 16: "fat, single and ready to mingle", I was uplifted.
Chandler: Oh, those places! There's always so many people, their being corralled like cattle, and... you know, there's always some idiot who goes "Mooooo"!
Monica: Oh, sure it does! In high school, you werent jealous at all even though all your girlfriends were cheating on you!
Ross: Oh.. you don't get it! (Passes out and slumps across her)
Ross: Oh Ill prove it! Ill prove it like a theorem!!
Ross: What? You do? You do? (Looks) Oh my God!
Chandler: Oh, it would be you! You! Monica! And you'd get all the votes!
PHOEBE: OH!! Oh I thought they were just watching me. You know, like at, like at an aquarium, ya know.
ALISON: Oh, my major was totally useless. I mean, how often do you look in the classifieds and see "Philosopher wanted"?
Monica: Oh my god. Today's the sixth?! I may be done ovulating! I may have also served some very questionable meat at the restaurant.
Phoebe Sr: Oh gosh, Lily, yes. Of course I remember Lily. I... Then you must be?
Rachel: Well can we see it?! Oh maybe we shouldnt. I mean if she just died this morning out of respect.
Phoebe: Oh, God, just do it! (Grabbing the phone.) Call her! Stop being so testosteroney!
Chandler: Oh, so what you're saying is you're not completely fulfilled by Rick, Ethan and myself?
Melissa: Oh no!
Phoebe: Oh, this is like the best day ever. Ever! You guys might get back together, Monica and Chandler are getting their baby, there are chicks and ducks in the world again! Oh, I feel like I'm in a musical! (Singing) "Daa - raa... When the sun comes up, bright and beaming! And the moon comes..."
Eric: Oh right, youve got a church group meeting tonight.
Ross: Oh see, I-I needed a new thing for today and there's this leather store that always smells so good and I thought to myself, "Wow, (To Chandler) I never really owned a good smelling pair of pants before."
Phoebe: Oh! The yuk! Ross, he's doing it again! (Points to a lamp which is shaking behind the sofa)
Amy: Oh. I was so looking forward to this. It was going to be such a beautiful Thanksgiving. We were going to have sushi.
Chandler: Oh, I can't believe my sperm have low motility because, let me tell you, when I was growing up they sure seem to be in a hurry to get places!!
Joey: (grunting) Oh my How much do you weigh Ross?!
JOEY: Oh, what about that thing he did when he tipped the guy who showed us to our seats. You never even saw the money, it was like this. [With money in his palm] Hey Chandler, thanks for showing us to our seats [shakes his had and passes the dollar].
Joey: Oh, yeah, well I already did that! They said theyre gonna look into it right after they solved all the murders.
Joey: (muffled) Oh, they gave it to me at the sleep clinic, and its gonna help me not to snore.