words in movies
(Joey sits down and changes the channel, and we see two people making out.)
Joey: Pheebs! Youre blocking the porn! Look out!
Monica: Because! You could get to live out my fantasy!
Ross: Is that why in junior high you were the only one that hung out with that Ukrainian kid?
Monica: Ohhh, I knew you loved her! Then you need to go to the airport and tell her. Youre probably just gonna catch her just as shes about to go to the gate. Youre gonna call out her name and say, "I love you!" And shes gonna say, "I love you, too!" And you guys are going to have the most amazing kiss, everyone at the gate will applaud.
The Doctor: Definitely. (Points out each head on the ultrasound.)
Phoebe: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!! So I-I mean so in a few months Im going to have three full grown babies just walkin around inside me?! Oh! Oh! And its gonna be one of those log rides where they just come shooting out!
Frank: Yeah, Ive been thinking ever since you said we were having triplets, the best thing for me to do is to drop out of college and get a job.
Frank: Yeah, yknow when we found out we were going to have a baby, yknow I figured yknow like I should yknow have like a careerand I love refrigerators!
Ross: (stops her) Wait uh, listen. I-I, I have to tell you something. Umm, Ive been thinking, Im just gonna come out and say it. Okay? I-I-I ah, I-I think I love you.
Rachel: Im going to find out if he really thinks supermodels are too skinny. (As she exits, Phoebe enters.) Hey, Pheebs!
Chandler: They dont really talk to us about that kind of stuff. I can get you some free white out though.
Monica: It is not over because she is going to call you and tell you she loves you. And the reason why she couldnt, is because her feelings were so strong, it scared her. Now you go home and wait for her call, she could be calling you from the plane! Come on now go! Go! (Tries to push Ross out the door.)
Chandler: Hi! Listen, can we watch cartoons on your television? We need a porn break. We spent the last two hours watching In & Out & In, Again.
Phoebe: Ooh-Ooh! I did it! I did it! I figured out a way to make money! Im gonna open up my own massage place and Franks gonna help me! And! We can work it around his schedule so he doesnt have to quit school!
Chandler: A place where no one will ever get out alive?
Monica: All right. When is, when is the next flight out?
(She sets her bag down on the foosball table and Joey sees the Toblerone bar sticking out of it and gazes longingly at it.)
The Security Guard: (To Phoebe) Didn't I just throw you out of here?
Joey: Why dont you tell me something I dont know! (He storms out, and once Treeger closes the door behind him, Joey makes an Oops! have.)
Chandler: Night-night.....Janice. (he starts thinking to him self) 'Look at all that room on her side, you good fit a giant penguin over there. That would be weird though. Okay, hug and roll time. I'm huggin', I'm huggin', your rollin', and....yes! Freedom! (his one arm is still under her) Except for this arm! I'm stuck. Stuck arm! Okay, time for the old table cloth trick, one fluid motion. Quick like a cat, quick like a cat! And 1...2...3!' (Pulls his arm out from under her and she is spun off of the bed.)
Monica: You sold me out.
Rachel: I did not sell you out.
(She does Ross's little gesture. In response Ross puts his hands behind his neck with his arms sticking straight out and starts flapping them together.)
JOEY: Yeah, but then the guy opens his beer and those girls run at him, so, everything seems to work out OK.
Chandler: Well, at least we got these little guys out.
Chandler: (lets him out) What happened?!!
Ross: I got held up at Dr. Gettleman's office. There was some guy that freaked everybody out.
Joey: Oh yeah (He mimes sticking his fingers into a jar of peanut butter, scooping some out, and eating it off his fingers.)
Joey: All right, you know what? We don't have a choice. It's like I would have said in that sci-fi movie if I'd gotten the part. "Those are our men in there, we have to get them out! Even if I have to sacrifice the most important thing in my life; my time-machine."
Joey: Chandler, Chandler, yknow what we should do? You and I should go out and get some new sunglasses.
Ross: What am I supposed to do? He's out cold! In fact he was just talking in his sleep before and evidently he wants someone named Fran to spank him harder.
Rachel: Ross, its okay. You can come out.
Ross: Unless (Rachel groans.) You anticipated that I would figure all this out and you know that it actually is a girl, and you really do want her to be named Ruth! Well, Im not falling for that! Okay? Ruth is off the table!
Monica: Maybe because it's you hung your head out of the window like a dog the whole ride here.
Monica: (looking out the window) Hey Joey! Isn't that the girl that waved at you the other day?
Phoebe: You are useless! Freaking out about commitment is the one thing you can do! The one thing! And you can't even do that right! God!
Rachel: Gone! I mean its amazing Pheebs. I feel so free and so graceful. (Turns and bumps into a mounted policeman and falls) Hey! Look out for the horse! Sorry! (Runs off.)
Ross: Thanks? But I have plans; Elizabeth and I are going out of town.
Monica: No, its okay, not only did I get to go out with Chip Matthews, I got to dump Chip Matthews.
Phoebe: Youre the cook! With out you its just me driving up to peoples houses with empty trays and asking for money!
Mr. Waltham: You spend half your life in the bathroom, why dont you ever go out the bloody window!
JOEY: [to a wedding guest] How's that pig-in-the-blanket workin' out for you? [the guy nods] I wrapped those bad boys.
Ross: Y'know what? I'm gonna go out on a limb and say no divorces in '99!
(They start making out again.)
Carol: He picked it out of the toy store himself, he loves it.
Monica: Well Rachels not here! (Runs out.)
Monica: I know! I know! And he totally freaked out and I cant find him anywhere!
The Dry Cleaner: He went out with my wife!
Chandler: No, I dont want to tell anybody else because I dont want Monica to find out.
Rachel: (understands that Monica and Ethan wanna be alone) Hey, did you guys check out those new hand-dryers in the bathroom?
(Ross walks over to her and starts to kiss her passionately. After a while Rachel backs out. She thinks a while and starts kissing him back.)
The Dry Cleaner: You, get out of my shop!
Phoebe: I like waking up with you too. (Looks out the window) Oh! It's such a beautiful morning. (Some birds are singing outside the window) Oh, I can stay here all day.
Phoebe: Chandler, I found the perfect ring. (Holding it out for her.)
Monica: Okay well then, Ill fire him today and you go out with him for another week.
Joey: Hey, you wanna do Joey a favor, maybe you go out with Joey. (He turns around to see Chandler glaring at him.)
Ross: Well, I guess I can check out those apartment listings, even though there's never anything in here.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is sitting around the kitchen table. Rachel's credit cards are spread out on the table along with a pair of scissors.]
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Paul and Rachel are getting ready to go out. Paul is entering from the bathroom.]
[Rachel and Phoebe walk into the kitchen. Monica comes out of the bathroom and goes over to Ross.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is coming out of the bathroom after a shower wearing only her bath robe, walks into the kitchen, and opens the fridge. As she bends over to grab a bottle of wine, her robe falls open (Damn this network primetime programming, we didn't see anything!) and she quickly closes it again. But then realizes she didn't have to do that. So she closes the fridge and stands next to the table, thinks about it for a little while and ]
Monica: I think Ill help her out. (She gets up to go over and help Rachel, and reveals she has no pants.) (to Rachel) What is going on here?
Ross: That's ok. Uh, anyway, well he and I both really liked you a lot, uhm, but we didn't want anything to jeopardize our friendship, so we kinda made a pact, that neither of us could ask you out!
Chandler: Yeah, check out the ring. (Shows it to them.)
ROSS: Oh, mine too. Isn't that neat, scotch neat. Would you excuse me? [walks out in the hallway, Mr. Greene is walking out of Chandler and Joey's apartment] Hey, hey, where you uh, sneakin off to mister?
Chandler: Check out the ring.
Phoebe: Oh I know, I helped pick out the ring.
Janine: How are we gonna get out of that one?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the girls are all out on the balcony.]
Rachel: No Mon that's not the point. I'm out a thousand dollars, I'm all scratched up, and I'm stuck with this stupid cat that looks like a hand! (Storms out.)
Ross: (to the rest of them) Yeah-yeah you guys. Get out of here!
Joey: Whoa-whoa, that-that was just a theory! Theres a lot of theories that didnt pan out. The lone gunman. Communism. Geometry.
[Scene: Joey's apartment, the next morning, Rachel is passed out on the couch.]
Ross: So the first time you ask a guy out, he-he turns you down?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is looking at her beeper still in the pot. She takes it out, shakes it, and puts it back in.]
Joey: Me?! Oh come on, man! You can't do this! Come on! (Being dragged out by the guard) I'm your hand twin!!
Ross: Oh, it's-it's Marcel. He keeps shutting me out, y'know? He's walking around all the time dragging his hands...
(Everyone clinks glasses and Chandler freaks out again.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Phoebe, Rachel, and Monica are there. Ross is trying to figure out why Phoebe's mad at him.]
Elizabeth: (sticking her head out her window) Ross! Wait!
JOEY: It's just that, I, I'm gonna miss Joseph. I liked him. His wife, she was hot. [Chadler pushes him out the door by the face.]
Ross: Uh no-no, she-shes out for the night.
Rachel: Yeah, ohh! Why, damnit, why did I open my mouth? (In a girlish voice) I have a crush on you; I am attracted to you. (Back to normal again) Gee, I-I know that I freaked him out
[Cut back to Monica and Chandlers room, they are making out again as theres another knock on the door.]
Joey: Whoa!! Now look, dont be just blurtin stuff out. I want you to really think about your answers. Okay?
Monica: Chandler! (Follows him out.)
Monica: (suspiciously) Okay. (Exits to carry out Phoebes wishes.)
Joey: Oh, no! (Starts that screaming thing again. Rachel stops him by pulling his fingers out of his ears.)
(Follows Joey into their apartment and shrugs on his way out.)
Monica: Hey, check me out, Im a slut!
Monica: Ohhh! Let me see! Oh God, I can't believe this! They're an hour late and they're just staying out there, talking!
Monica: If the school finds out youre fired.
Richard: Uh, no! No! Thats art! If it bothers you I can put my art out.
Joey: Pheebs! Check it out! Check it out! Check it out! Check it out! (Hands her one.)
Phoebe: (coming back out) Hey! Rachel! Come on!!!!
Rachel: Okay, hold on just a second. (She grabs a camera out of the desk and takes his picture.) Im sorry, its for human resources, everybody has to do it. Could you just stand up please?
Chandler: Its not all juice! (Rachel quickly gets out of the way.)
Monica: Oh please! Why else would you have made out with Ross?!
Rachel: Yeah, one time, when we were dating, uh we got a late checkout, he got so excited it was the best sex we ever had. Until yknow, he screamed out Radisson at the end.
Chandler: No, the little girl creeps me out.
Rachel: No Yeah, all the time, constantly. It's terrifying. But you know that I figure it it has to work out.
[Time lapse, dinner is now finished and Ross is looking out the window.]
(She comes back out.)
Monica: Yknow I used to go out with this guy that was a really light sleeper, and whenever I started to snore, he would just roll me over
Dr. Green: This is nice. I pay two hundred dollars for dinner, you put down twenty, and you come out looking like Mr. Big Shot. You really want to be Mr. Big Shot? Here, Ill tell you what, you pay the whole bill, Mr. Big Shot, all right. (rips up the bill, and throws it at Ross, then leaves)
Phoebe: Ooh, technically you owe me $600 for sending out happy thoughts on your last ten auditions.
Ross: You've really crossed the line here, but that's okay, it's ok 'cause I'm on my way to buy some Photoshop software and a stack of gay porn. That's right! Your coming out is about to get real graphic.
CHANDLER: Oh please, I saw the way you were checking out his mouldings. You want it.
Joey: (recoils in horror) Women are mean!!! (Storms out.)
[All by myself is playing. Chandler is sitting in front of a window while it's raining outside. We see Joey through a rainy window. The camera zooms out to show it's just his tabletop water sculpture.]
Chandler: (To Ross) Thanks for picking out the earrings man.
Phoebe: No that's just me coughing! (Doing some weird coughing noises and the dog barks again. Phoebe comes out of the room.) Oh, good, there you are! Listen, um, I have a dog in my room.
(They start making out again, and it takes Joey trying to enter to stop them.)
Rachel: Ohh, you should know, this place is a real babe magnet. Wanna make out?
Paul: I dont like you going out with my daughter Ross.
Rachel: (waving them in his face) Take 'em! (Joey makes a noise and jumps out of the way.) Joey, you can touch them! They're your underwear.
(More falls out.)