words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, erm, Monica and Rachel's, Monica is still unpacking after the move, and Phoebe is their also.]
Phoebe: Oh, hey, Mon, do you still have your like old blouses and dresses from high school?
Phoebe: Well, its just that maternity clothes are so expensive.
Rachel: Bloomingdales eliminated my department. (Phoebe gasps)
Phoebe: Personal shopping? What is that? Like where you walk around with snooty rich people and tell them what to buy?
Phoebe: That sounds great!
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Chandler are entering after the play. Phoebe and Joey are already there.]
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Ooh! How was Kathys play?
Phoebe: Thats a good idea for a business!
Phoebe: Hey, Mel Gibson and Clint Eastwood.
Phoebe: Oh-okay, I get the game now.
Phoebe: Oh. (Joey flips the pancake and Phoebe catches it and throws it on her plate.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Phoebe, and Ross are there eating pizza as Rachel enters.]
Phoebe: Rachel has a new doll.
Phoebe: Ooh, what do I smell?
Phoebe: Ooh! (They all go over to her apartment)
Phoebe: What? What?
Phoebe: (getting up) Well, I hate to eat and run, but
Phoebe: Yeah, I dont need it.
Phoebe: Well, why did you make like a whole big thing out of y'know, everyone has to hang out in the big apartment?
Phoebe: If you wanted to punish them, you shouldve just made them hang out here!
Phoebe: Oh, are we gonna trash that place?
Phoebe: Wait a minute.
Phoebe: Why dont you ask him out?
Phoebe: He just got a divorce right?
Phoebe: So hes probably really nervous around women, y'know? Maybe, you just have to make the first move.
Phoebe: (shocked) Youve never asked a guy out?!!
Phoebe: Thousands of times!! That doesnt make me sound too good does it?
Phoebe: Oh, please!
Joey: (to Phoebe) Hey, how you doin?
(Phoebe looks at him, and then giggles and looks away.)
Rachel: You know what, Im gonna do that, Im gonna call him up, and Im gonna ask him out. I can do that. Ask him out. (Practising) How you doin? (Calls him) Hi! Joshua? Its Rachel Green from Bloomingdales. (Listens) Yeah, umm, I was wondering if you umm, if you umm, left your wallet at the store today? Well, we found a wallet, and we(Listens) the license? Well, that is a good idea! Uh, well, lets see here this says this license belongs to a uh, uh, belongs to a mister uh, Pheebs, and umm, yeah, so sorry to bother you at home. Ill see you tomorrow. Bye. (Hangs up) (to Phoebe) Youve done that a thousand times?
Phoebe: Ive never done that.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross, Joey, and Phoebe are watching a movie as Chandler comes in from his bedroom.]
Phoebe: No, sorry.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey is debriefing Rachel on her rejection earlier that day and telling her what she shouldve done. Ross and Phoebe are watching.]
Phoebe: Great!
Phoebe: Oh did youwhat did youdid you work for two days straight?
Phoebe: Oh good!
Phoebe: How? How is your fault?
PHOEBE: Oh! I can't believe it. I can't believe this. We're just like, sitting at home, trying to guess Joey's fingers, and you guys are out like partying and having fun, and you know, all, "hey, Blowfish, suck on my neck".
Phoebe: Yeah, but if I do tell him, then hes gonna hate myself. I mean look at him and his Mom, I cant. (pause) But, you guys can, please you gotta talk him out of it.
Rachel: I just, Phoebe, said yknow thought she saw something between you guys.
Phoebe: What about, what about when I said yknow about the apartment pants, how dumb was I?
Phoebe: Sorry.
(Phoebe enters, walks up to Monica, and exhales exasperatedly.)
Monica: Okay, come here! (Phoebe joins them in the hug.)
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler, Monica, Joey, and Phoebe are there.]
Phoebe: Oh! Joey uh, were you in our room last night?
Phoebe: What happened?
Phoebe: Hi!
Rachel: (grabbing Phoebe) Okay. Well be right back. (They go into her office and she closes the door.)
Phoebe: Y'know what, it doesnt matter what you say it's not gonna make a difference anyway, so you can just go.
Phoebe: Hey! You could do a lot worse than Joey Tribbiani!!
Phoebe: Yeah thats great! Next to that, Chandler wont look so stupid.
Rachel: Phoebe, if this guys going through a divorce, is it such a good idea to start going out with him?
Phoebe: But... I'm ready, so, just deal.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel are eating breakfast.]
Phoebe: Oh! Ooh! Oh Monica! Its so beautiful.
Phoebe: Oh I-I dont know about that. No, I think that if the two of you had sex the-the-the repercussions would be catastrophic.
Phoebe Sr: (entering) Hi! Whats going on?
Phoebe: Oh, Ode To A Pubic Hair?
Phoebe: (wearing a veil) Am I crazy or does this totally go?!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is eating cereal from a bowl she has balanced on her stomach as Joey, Chandler, and Monica return.]
Phoebe: (entering) Have I gone deaf?
Phoebe: Maybe because you never listen to anything that I say. I talk about her all the time! DENISE!!!!!
Phoebe: Im having a really good time!
Phoebe: Its slang for pregnant.
Phoebe: Yeah, I should probably take it back. Ooh, but you know what? While I'm at the police station, I could check their Ten Most Wanted lists because my friend Fritzy has been like number 11 forever, so this could be her year! (She crosses her fingers in hope.)
Phoebe: Hi Ginger.
Phoebe: I dont have it!
Chandler: Phoebe, I asked you to guard the ring!
Phoebe: Okay.
Phoebe: Oh my God! Thats the creep that youre with at the Statue of Liberty.
Phoebe: Youre still gonna go out with her?!
Phoebe: (To Monica) Anyway, I should go. Okay, bye.
Phoebe: And! She uses sex as a weapon!
Phoebe: Fine. Okay, enjoy your concert. (Starts to leave.)
Phoebe: You dont have to be back for a half-hour!
Phoebe: Hi.
Phoebe: Yeah I mean its probably nothing, but I just wanted to warn you that there might be something there.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's. Ross lays a lot off small papers, shaped like the U.S. states onto the floor making a map with the states. Phoebe enters]
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Phoebe are there.]
Phoebe: Oh, I see. (Exits angrily.)
Phoebe: And-and youre using my name!
Phoebe: You mean a backup?
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, The One With George Stephanopoulos, Phoebe is showing Monica and Rachel that she brought Operation to their slumber party.]
Phoebe: Oh, you're a paleonthologist, too! (pause) Oh, ok, now, what do you think of Ranion's new theory of species' variegation in segmented arthopods?
Phoebe: Both of you together?
Phoebe: Ooh, lets see it!
Phoebe: Oh my God! Is that him? (She points at someone.)
Phoebe: I hope its you.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe enters to find Rachel still packing.]
Phoebe: Yes!!! Oh!!
Phoebe: Still.
Phoebe: Hey Rachel?
Phoebe: Uh-hmm.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is bringing Rachel some coffee.]
Rachel: Yeah but Phoebe
Phoebe: (gets up and starts to leave) We want the last six years back!!
Phoebe: Oh! Well, if thats what you want
Rachel: Ohh! No way Phoebe! I want to be Monicas!
Phoebe: Oh I know.
Phoebe: You dont play the oboe!
Phoebe: Oh, thank you so much! (They hug.) Okay.
Phoebe: No, youre too late!!! She already took out the trash!!!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Chandler, and Phoebe are there as Ross enters.]
Phoebe: Happy Holidays. Feliz Navidad. Allo, and Merry Christmas. (A man put some change in her bucket.) Ohh thank you sir. Here's some joy. (She waves her hand up and down as if she is spreading joy.)
Phoebe: What are you talking about?
Phoebe: See? This is exactly why you shouldnt lie!
Joey: Okay, Phoebe
Phoebe: No! Coins hate me!
Joey: What?! Noooo (Phoebe gasps.)
Phoebe: Yes! Your honor?
Phoebe: Oh!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Joey are watching ET.]
Phoebe: Oh he knows! (Quietly) For the most part.
Phoebe: Okay. All right you yellow-bellied-lilly-livered-DRAW!! (they both kick up the foot rests like an old fashioned gun fight.)
Phoebe: I brought a bunch of stuff for the house, so check it out. Ha-ha. (She removes this large ceramic dog that comes up to the second floor and places it next to the house.)
Phoebe: Really?! I won!
Phoebe: (running after her) Rach, its gonna be okay! (To Ross and Joey) You guys are the best!
Phoebe: Well I'm sorry Rachel, but I'm not like you, ok? Not everyone can afford help. (she and Mike leave)
Phoebe: WellButNow, if-if you can achieve positronic distillation of sub-atomic particles yknow before he does, then he can come back. (They hug again.)
(Monica gasps and holds her forehead. Phoebe, Rachel and Ross pull back their heads)
Phoebe: Oh, but, could we not go together? I,I don't wanna be the geek that invited the boss.
Monica: Phoebe, that's how it starts. I don't need to eat the cake, I'll just smell the icing... why don't I just eat a little sliver, or, okay, just a slice or two. And next thing you know, you're 210 pounds and you get wedged in going down the tunnel slide. Phoebe, honey, I know this is hard. Look, if you talk to him, you're going to wanna see him. And if you see him, you're going to want to get back together with him. I know that's not what you want. (pause) Give me your phone.
Phoebe: Oh my god! Look, it's Ross and Rachel. Oh, the plan is working.
Phoebe: Hi!
Phoebe: Oh yeah!
Phoebe: Oh thats so sweet thanks.
Phoebe: This stuff is great!
Phoebe: Ohh.
Phoebe: Well, we just decided that Rachel is gonna be your maid of honor.
Phoebe: Yknow Rach, I think that, I think you should be Monicas made of honor.
Phoebe: Because I think it means more to you.
Phoebe: Wow! Well, if you nail the interview, you'll get it!
Rachel: Yeah okay, you laugh now, but shes gonna be yours. (Phoebe gets suddenly scared.)
Phoebe: Ahh, his work is done.
Phoebe: (looking at the picture again) Man alive!
Phoebe: Hey you guys, I dont mean to make things worse, but umm, I dont want to live with Rachel anymore.