words in movies
Phoebe: Okay. (Phoebe and Rachel join Monica and Chandler on the altar.) Hey Mon, why did you tell the guys you werent pregnant?
Phoebe: We found your test in the trash, if youre not pregnant(She sees Rachel shaking her head)Its because I am.
Phoebe: Yes, I I am with child. (Flash) And I didnt want to say anything because its your day; I didnt want to steal your thunder.
Phoebe: I cant say.
Phoebe: I cant say because hes famous.
Rachel: Oh my God, who is it?! (Phoebe rolls her eyes.)
Monica: Phoebe, come on, you have to tell us.
Phoebe: Okay, okay. Its James Brolin. James Brolin is the father of my baby.
Phoebe: What?! Well he never said that to me!
Phoebe: How about just the bridemaids?
Phoebe: It is.
Phoebe: Oh my God!
Phoebe: So instead you told me Monica was pregnant.
Phoebe: Sneaky.
Phoebe: Uh-hmm.
Phoebe: Oh, I know. I could only think of two names, him and Ed Begley Jr. and then I remembered hes gay.
Phoebe: (intrigued) Really?!
[Cut to Phoebe and Rachel at their table.]
Phoebe: So, are you ready to talk about it?
Phoebe: Now?
Phoebe: Okay, well talk about something else then.
Phoebe: Whos the father?!
Phoebe: Yeah. Thats fine. Thats fair. Is it Tag?
Rachel: Phoebe!!
Phoebe: Okay, Im sorry. Ill stop.
Phoebe: Is it Ross? Its Ross isnt itOh my God, its Joey!
Phoebe: Ah-hah! At least we know its a him.
Monica: Can you believe Phoebe got pregnant?!
Rachel: Uh-hmm. Im just thinking about Phoebe; poor knocked up Phoebe.
[Scene: continued from earlier, only now Phoebe joins them.]
Phoebe: Well, I just got off the phone with my lover, James Brolin
Phoebe: Yes, and apparently he is married to some singer, but he said he would leave her for me. And I said, "James, James Brolin, are you sure?" James Brolin said
Phoebe: (shocked) What?! (deadpan) Why bother?
Phoebe: Calm down. Maybe youre not pregnant.
Phoebe: When I got pregnant with the triplets, I took that test like three times just to make sure.
Phoebe: Im-Im just saying, dont freak out until youre a hundred percent sure.
Phoebe: Ill run out and get you one.
Phoebe: Oh no, she wont tell us.
Phoebe: See? This is why you register.
[Scene: The Womens Restroom, Rachel and Phoebe are waiting for the outcome of Rachels second test.]
Phoebe: 30 seconds.
Monica: (entering) Did I miss it? (Phoebe nods no.) Rachel, I-I want you to know that, if its positive, were gonna
Phoebe: Its time.
Phoebe: Okay.
Phoebe: Umm, its negative.
Phoebe: Its negative.
Phoebe: Here. (Gives Rachel a tissue.)
Phoebe: No, its positive.
Phoebe: Its-its not negative, its positive.
Phoebe: Well yeah, I lied before.
Phoebe: Now you know how you really feel about it.
Phoebe: With who?
(They both look at each other, then Phoebe gets an idea.)
Monica: Okay, I feel like Im talking to Lassie. All right, Phoebe would you just tell me!
Joey: Huh, if I had to guess I'd say Rachel is putting on the bubble wrap and Phoebe is doing the punching.
Joey: Are you kidding? Phoebe, I would be honored. (they hug)
Ross: Look, forget it Phoebe. Okay? Its Rachels tape and she can do whatever she wants with it. And she wants to destroy it. So, end of story.
Phoebe: All right fine! This looks like so much fun. (Examining the bowl of wet paper towels.)
Phoebe: Isnt there a national football league.
Roy: Damnit. OH! (To Phoebe) Big surprise! The hunk of beef has feelings!
Chandler: Well, I try to y'know, squeeze things. (Phoebe giggles uncontrollably.) Are you okay?
(Phoebe whispers something in Joey's ear, but after hearing it he jumps up, shocked)
Phoebe: No, Joey! You borrowed my cab; you have to drive it back.
Phoebe: Oh please! Just before when you were asleep in the lounge! That Armenian family was watching you instead of the TV. Oh, that reminds me. That Mr. Hasmeje still has my Gameboy.
(Phoebe and Rachel go to the back room and Emma continues to cry in the background while Chandler and Monica talk.)
PHOEBE: Oh God.� Remember the girls' nights we used to have sitting around talking about you and Ross?
Phoebe: Oh, okay. (Walks over to him.) Excuse me sir? Could you come with me please? You have a phone call.
Phoebe: But you were going to propose?
Phoebe: What about her whining and her constant need for attention?!
Phoebe: Oh no, Rach, no no, you know youre never supposed to wake a sleeping baby.
Phoebe: Maybe all the rulers are wrong.
Ross: What? No! No! I am not gonna hide it from PhoebeOoh, although I did get some great Pottery Barn sheets! (Gets them.)
Phoebe: Yeah, I should go to, `cause I'm playing in one hour. Hey, (clears her voice and in her normal voice) you guys should come hear me, ooh hear me. Ooh, (tries to sing) My sticky shoes--eww! Eww! I lost my sexy phlegm!
Phoebe: Yknow, birds have a very good sense of direction, and I thought maybe they could help us find where the presents are hidden.
Phoebe: You think hes emotionally unavailable?
Phoebe: Be careful, be careful! These are my rat babies!
[Scene: The Hotel, Monicas room, Mr. and Mrs. Bing are staring at each other while Phoebe looks on.]
Joey: Check it out. (He turns around, pulls down his pants, and shows Phoebe that hes got panties on.) How much of a man am I?!
[Time lapse. The girls have Ross pinned face down. Phoebe is sitting on his back and arms while holding his head down and facing Rachel. Rachel is sitting on his knees and holding his lower legs vertically, causing Ross pain.]
Phoebe: Yeah! Lets do that!! That-that sounds good. We should sit down and talk, just me, my lover Carol, and the Stings. Umm, how-how will I get in touch with them?
Phoebe: Oh hey! So, how did your doctors appointment go?
Phoebe: Yeah... All right, well that rules out Lana Titweiller
Phoebe: Hi, Bubbles. Manly. Well, I just thought I would drop by and let you know how it went with Joey.
Phoebe: I am sorry. I am, but this wedding is just really important to me.
Phoebe: Theyre just talking, and yknow what? Just because I think theyre soul mates doesnt mean anythings gonna happen.
Phoebe: Ooh, is that spelled with a C or a K? Oh my God! It doesnt matter; theyre both great!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone but Joey is waiting for Phoebe to arrive for her surprise birthday party. Rachel and Monica is telling Chandler about Rachel's incident.]
PHOEBE: There isn't time. You must leave everything. They'll take care of you next door.
Phoebe: That woman at the game didn't know what she was talking about. Mike, obviously you have balls.
Phoebe: Ok, have a good break-up.
Phoebe: Why? Just 'cause you're too lazy to get up off your touchie?
Phoebe: Shh! Doogie, shh! Doesn't anybody understand that I'm gonna be having babies soon? Huh? Go! Go little boy, go!
Phoebe: Oh. Well umm, okay heres a weird thing. My mother was also a supply manager.
Mike: (takes the check from Phoebe) Ok, look! Enough! Alright? I'm stepping in. I'm putting my foot down! As your future husband I'm going to make this decision for us. (thinking) Now... what do you think we should do?
Phoebe: God, I hope they kick his ass!
Phoebe: (as Ursula) You know... (unconsciously putting a hand on his knee) You're gonna be really, really hard to get over.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is reading a magazine, eating a cookie, and drinking some coffee as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: Well, I think I can help you get over him.
Phoebe: I know. But don't you think that it should be called Order and Law?
Rachel: Phoebe, I think... It's just too weird, I just saw a one year old running around with pantyhose on!
Monica: Phoebe! You kinda caught me at a bad time.
Phoebe: Well lets just say its shes lucky she has a sweet ass, cause shes not so good at the writing.
Phoebe: Oh, I have a headache. A horrible headache!
Monica: That’s crazy! (Phoebe looks bewildered). I am sorry. I just can’t imagine giving up my one wedding day like that!
Phoebe: Oh, can I play too? Ive never played football, like ever.
Phoebe: No but, why does that have to be a bad thing. Just change what it means. Y'know? Go down there and prove your Mother wrong. Finish the job you were hired to do, and well call that pulling a Monica.
Phoebe: I dontLook I dont know what youre complaining about now? You were both aware of the situation!
Phoebe: See, I-I think that one that Elton John wrote for, um, that guy on Who's The Boss.
Phoebe: Rachel is one of my closest friends. (Pause) Although, being the only one who knows anything about this does makes me feel special. Okay!
Rachel: I think it is. (Ross looks very sad. Phoebe and Joey enter.)
(She holds the phone out and starts taunting Phoebe. Phoebe calming knocks the phone out of Rachels hand and catches it.)
Phoebe: (keeping on running and yelling) OOOOOHHHHH! (she stops) Fine, I can't take it anymore! I'm putting an end to this! (she goes out to the balcony)
Phoebe: (Excitedly) Yeah, I already have my bell and later on...I get my bucket.
Phoebe: Oh Rach, good, listen isn't this perfect for me! (she's wearing another dress on a hanger around her neck)
Phoebe: Yeah, and I know you guys dont know a lot about psychic readings, but that one is pretty much the worse one you can get.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Phoebe, Rachel, and Monica are there. Ross is trying to figure out why Phoebe's mad at him.]
Phoebe: Ooh, God, it's him! It's that cop! God, I can't believe it! He found me!
(Rachel, Ross and Phoebe have their hands full and are stuffing all kinds of things down Joeys pants.)
Phoebe: Everybody looks so happy. I hate that.
Monica: (sits next to him) Phoebe, its okay that you dont want me to be your girlfriend because I have the best boyfriend.
Phoebe: Oh. (Joey flips the pancake and Phoebe catches it and throws it on her plate.)
Phoebe: I'm in vice. Yeah, in fact I'm undercover right now. I'm a whore.
Phoebe: Op, the ruined quiches are ready.
Phoebe: Shhhhhh! Im swamped right now.
Ben: (running to the bathroom) Thanks Phoebe!
Phoebe: I need to talk to you, its pretty urgent. Its about Monica and Chandler.
Phoebe: Ok, it's too hard, I can't teach you!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel and Ross are in the kitchen. Phoebe is sitting at the couch with oven mits on her hands.]
[Scene: Stings Apartment, Phoebe has come to talk about Jack and is waiting for Stings wife, Trudie Styler, to enter.]
Phoebe: Hi. Listen, Im sorry about that whole thing with Roger. It really wasnt right, and I, and I want to make it up to you, so umm, I brought you something that I think youll really enjoy. (Goes into the hallway and returns carrying the Evander Holyfield cutout.) Now, this is just a loan. Okay? Im gonna, Im gonna want him back. So (Looks at him longingly) Im gonna go now. (Exits.) (Pause) (Entering) Im sorry, I thought I could do it and I cant! (She grabs the cutout and exits for good.)
(He goes to the bathroom and Phoebe puts some pepper and salt on her food. With the salt she takes a bit and throws it over her left shoulder as she faces us.)
Phoebe: Yknow, dirty talk, m�nage � trois, toys
Phoebe: It's really crazy! The hall, the dress, the food... I-I had no idea how expensive this stuff was!
(They run for Phoebe's purse, Phoebe gets there first and takes the cell. Monica tries to take it away from her)
Phoebe: Im curious about the human body.
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler and Phoebe are sitting on couches. A beautiful woman is looking at Chandler.]
Phoebe: No, I just heard when people live together, they split the cost of stamps. Don't they?
Phoebe: Oh, I'd say about a month.
Phoebe: YOU’RE SO GENEROUS AND KIND AND (crowd stops cheering) YOU'RE AMAZING IN BED (everyone hears it and stare at them.) (to everybody) IT’S OUR ANNIVERSARY!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning, Phoebe is there with her puppy and is trying to sing it to sleep as Chandler enters.]
Phoebe: I just cant decide who she looks more alike, you or Rachel?
PHOEBE: Ok, do you know how to go from D to A minor?
Phoebe: (on phone) Hi, this Phoebe from Empire Office Supplies, can I speak to your supply manager please? (Listens) Earl, thanks. (Listens) Hi Earl, this is Phoebe from Empire Office Supplies Id like to talk to you about your toner needs. (Shes reading from the script.)
[Scene: The hospital, Chandler and Monica are there with Phoebe as Ross enters.]
Phoebe: Yayohyay! Okay, I gotta go tell Frank and Alice! Right now!
Phoebe: (still mimicking a heartbeat, only faster) Phoebe-Phoebe-Phoebe-PhoebeBurrrrr! (Mimics the sound of a cardiac monitor going off.)
Monica: Okay! Okay! We can take a hint! (They start to leave but run into Phoebe with her guy in tow.) (To Phoebe) What are you doing here?!
Phoebe: [looking outside the window] Eww, look. Ugly Naked Guy lit a bunch of candles.
Phoebe: You guys. You suck too. (She hugs them both.)
[Scene: Phoebe and Rachel's, everyone minus Ross are arriving to inspect the damage. The fire department is still there.]
Rachel: This was such a huge mistake. I cant tell him Phoebe. I cant, I cant, I cant, I cant
Rachel: Wow, a Swedish massage from a real Swedish person. (Puts her head in the hole and Phoebe enters)