words in movies
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is filing her nails as Ross and Ben enter.]
Rachel: Hi! Hi Ben!
Rachel: Oh, yeah go ahead.
Rachel: No. No.
Rachel: Ben, its Rachel! (He closes the door.) But whatever.
Rachel: Awww, just like his daddy.
Rachel: What-what about Monica?
Rachel: (nervous) So it would just be, me alone?
Rachel: Huh umm
Rachel: Well thatyknow its just uh, Ive never done that before. Me and him alone.
Rachel: Okay. Okay. Okay. Uh, what do I, what do I do with him?
Rachel: Okay.
Ross: Okay. (Ben enters) Ben? Come here. All right, Im gonna leave you here with Aunt Rachel for about an hour. Okay? Are you gonna be okay?
Rachel: Yeah I think so.
Ross: (To Rachel) I wasnt talking to you.
Rachel: Bye. (Ross exits.) Ahhh (Silence) So this is fun, huh?
Rachel: Okay. Uh, want something-want something to drink?
Rachel: Uh great! How do you feel about Diet Coke?
Rachel: Okay. Well thats pretty much all that we haveOh! Oh! Have you ever had a virgin margarita? (Holds up a bottle of margarita mix.)
Rachel: Water it is.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Ben are sitting on the couch bored out of their minds.]
Rachel: Ben yknow when uh, when you were a baby, you and I used to hang out all the time. Cause I was, I was your daddys girlfriend.
Rachel: No, Im not.
Rachel: Hey! We were not on aOkay. Thats fine! Fine. Yknow what Ben? One day when you are a lot older I am going to tell you that entire story over a pitcher of real margaritas, okay?
Rachel: (checks her watch) Fifty-two minutes. (Pause) So no-no brothers and sisters, huh? That must be nice. You dont have to share stuff.
Rachel: Oh, youre one of those. But yknow what? I have two sisters of my own and we just-just tortured each other.
Rachel: Well yknow, we would umm, repeat everything the other said, or uh, wed jump out of closets to scare each other, or switch the sugar for the salt so theyd put salt on their cereal.
Rachel: Yeah? You like that one?
Rachel: Im funny? Oh thank God! Well hey, Ive got a ton of these! Umm, oh hearDo you want a good one? Heres a good one. Umm, you uh, you take a quarter, take a quarter and, and you blacken the edge. Right? (Does so.) And then you say to person, I bet you cant roll this quarter from your forehead to your chin without it leaving your face. And then when they do it, theyre left with a big black pencil line right down the center of their face.
Rachel: Yeah, I-I-I-Im funny Ben, but Im not stupid. Okay?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is reading and there is knock on the door which she answers.]
Rachel: Coming.
Rachel: Uh-oh.
Rachel: Oh yeah? Did he pull the old (She is waving her hand up and down her face. Shes thinking about the pencil mark.)
Rachel: Oh that.
Rachel: Oh, come on! Saran Wrap on the toilet seat, you dont think thats just a little funny?!
Rachel: (looking at his mark) Yes.
[Scene: Carol and Susans, there is a knock on the door and Carol opens it to reveal Rachel.]
Carol: Hey Rachel! (The camera cuts to her face and we see that Ben pulled the quarter trick with her as well.)
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Well yknow I was just in the neighborhood and I passed by your building and I thought to myself, "Whats up with Carol and sweet, little Ben?"
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Id love that. I would loooove (Carol goes to make the coffee and she sits down.) So uh, so where is sweet little Ben? I would love to have a little...
Ben: (jumping up from behind her chair) Gotcha!! (Rachel jumps up startled.)
Rachel: I found him! (To Ben) Very funny, come here! (She sits down on the coffee table and Ben walks up.) That is exactly why Ive come here to talk to you okay?
Rachel: Yes oh(To Ben)Do I want sugar in my coffee? (Ben nods no.) No, just some milk would be good Carol. Thanks. (To Ben) Okay, do you remember all that stuff I taught you yesterday?
Rachel: Dont do that.
Rachel: Seriously, your dad doesnt like pranks.
Rachel: Oh damnit!
Rachel: No! Dont say that! Dont say that!
Rachel: No dont! Go back to repeating!
Rachel: Oh crap!
[Scene: Carol and Susans, Rachel is talking with Ben.]
Rachel: So now what have we agreed?
Rachel: And-and what else?
Rachel: Very good.
Ross: Rachel! What are you doing here?
Rachel: Im just visiting my good friend Carol.
Rachel: Yeah!
Rachel: Carol Lesbian?
Rachel: What line?
Rachel: All right, Im sorry. Im sorry I didnt tell you but you were so mad already!
Rachel: Okay, maybe they are not funny to you
Rachel: Or Carol! But theyre funny to kids and who is it hurting?!
Rachel: That was you?! We heard about you in Junior High! Did you really just shake your fist in the air and shout, "I will be revenged?!"
Rachel: Fine. Fine, but Ill have you know that once I taught him that stuff he called me Fun Aunt Rachel. And I loved being Fun Aunt Rachel but Ill go back to being Boring and Uncomfortable Aunt Rachel if thats what you want!
Rachel: Look he doesnt have any brothers or sisters, somebodys gonna have to teach him this stuff! And I havent taught him anything that a normal 6-year-old doesnt know anyway!
Rachel: I gotta go! (Runs out.)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is in the kitchen as Ross and Ben are entering.]
Rachel: Hey!
Ross: Hey Im sorry to do this to you again but uh, is there any way you can look after Ben for a little bit? I-Ive got this meeting at school. And-and he-he asked for his uh, Fun Aunt Rachel, so
Rachel: Ohhh! Well of course I will watch him! We have fun, dont we Ben? (He nods yes.)
Rachel: Ohh, okay. (Ross has a sign on his back that reads Poop.) WhAh-ha! (Ross stops and turns.) Wait a minute. Uh Ben, I cant do it.
Rachel: I cant let him go out that way, hes got a meeting. (To Ross) Youve got something here on your back.
Rachel: Oh I
Rachel: No! Wait! Come on!
Rachel: No you guys (She walks out into the hallway.)
Ross: I-I-am(Suddenly Ross starts screaming and comes falling down the stairs landing just in front of Rachel.)
Rachel: EHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! My God!!!!!!!!!!! Oh my God!!!!!!! (She runs over to him and finds that it was a dummy and that she had been had.)
Rachel: What?
Rachel: I dunno. Yknow to me hell always be Jack Geller, walks in while youre changing.
Chandler: Come on, you're going to Bloomingdale's with Julie? That's like cheating on Rachel in her house of worship.
Rachel: Well, there is one thing that we havent tried, but someone thinks that, (mimicking Ross) "That will open up a can of worms."
Rachel: Well, I'm very impressed.
Phoebe: Hey, are Ross and Rachel back?
Rachel: Well, well, well, look what mommy found!!
Rachel: What?
(Ross and Rachel enter.)
Joey: (to Ross and Rachel) I've been here the whole time!
(Rachel wipes away some tears.)
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Oh! Emma, that's right! You're that many!
Rachel: Okay. (they both look into the camera, and Ross waves.) Hi Emma. Well, your first birthday is over, and it was really...
Rachel: (angrily) NO, no science camp!
Rachel: Wait, but theres no money! Well this is terrible! You guys are gonna have to get married in like a, rec. center!
Rachel: You know, I'm thinking about letting Emma have her first cookie.
Rachel: Oh yeah, nothing! These are happy tears! This is just what I wanted.
RACHEL: So do you uh, think we can get you one of those uh, uniform things?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is writing letters as Rachel enters.]
Charlie: (to Rachel) So, you know what, I really like those jackets with the shoulder pads on them. Where do you think those would be?
Rachel: Oh, I have to pee. If I dont come out in five minutes its because Ive choked to death on the potpourri stink. (Goes into the bathroom.)
Amy: You're not Rachel.
Chandler: Again, let's journey back... As I recall what Rachel said, was she had never notice the shape of your skull before. And Joey... Well, Joey didn't realise that there was anything different.
Rachel: So now, what are you doing here?
Rachel: God!
Rachel: What? Oh my God! To who?
Rachel: Oh wow! That deserves another piece of candy.
Rachel: Thank you doctor. (Dr. Long exits.) (To Joey) Oh thank you for being so nice and calm.
Rachel: Oh, I know, isn't she?
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: A-And??
Rachel: All right. What's your news, Amy?
Rachel: No, what's he like?
Rachel: Huh... wow, so he's gotta be...
Rachel: Ok.
Rachel: Ok, let’s keep talking.
RACHEL: Ross, Ross, please listen to me. Ross, you are so much better for me than Paolo ever was. I mean you care about me, you're loving, you make me laugh.
Rachel: Look! This is ridiculous. We should be packing you!! (She knocks over Monica, grabs a box, and runs into the kitchen.)
Rachel: Oh, good for you!
Rachel: Amy, hi!
Rachel: Joey, I can’t do that!
Rachel: (walking in hurriedly) Open your drapes! Open your drapes!
Rachel: (Sees Phoebe's slippers through the hole) Wow... I really love your... (startled as she realizes those are Phoebe's slippers)
Rachel: Amy, that’s what I was supposed to wear today, that’s why I hung it on the door.
Rachel: Wow, Ikea... what a rich culture. Uhm, you know what? I have a friend who is a masseuse.
[Scene: Monica’s Apartment. Rachel, Ross, Monica and Chandler are there, Phoebe enters the room]
Rachel: Well, what happened?
Rachel: I cannot believe you guys! He was really nice and he left because of you!
Rachel: Phoebe, that’s huge!
Rachel: Then what's that big lump under your covers?
Rachel: I think it could be kind of great!
Phoebe: (To Rachel and Ross) Well, do you think I should propose?
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: (Takes the phone) Oh! That's interesting, since she died seven years ago!!
Rachel: (trying to divert his attention from the window by jumping up and down) HI!! Hi!
Rachel: Why not?
Rachel: (Shocked) Wha... the next one?
Rachel: Absolutely.
(Rachel looks at Ross and her agrees silently)
Rachel: See, there's always one guy. (Mocking) "If I had a wish, I'd wish for three more wishes." (Joey enters.)
Monica: (visibly upset) She picked Rachel. I mean, she tried to back out of it, but it was obvious. She picked Rachel.
Rachel: All right, yknow what, come on, do we really have to watch this while we eat? (She makes a move for the remote.)
(Rachel looks very shocked)
Rachel: (sounds excited) Yeah!
(Rachel looks at Emma)
Rachel: Nothing.
(Rachel looks worried)
Phoebe: Rachel, listenI mean, if you let me have him then I will really owe you one.
Rachel: Nah, I don't really want her to see.
Rachel: Oh, they're real!
Rachel: Oh yeah? Since when?
Rachel: No, Im just kidding I would never do that to you! Okay, everybody, its trifle time!
Ross: (sees how strangely Monica, Chandler and Rachel are looking at him) What?
Rachel: (shouting) Babies don't care if they're slim.
Rachel: (looks at Ross and then at Amy again in disbelief) What?
(Rachel and Amy enter)
Rachel: Excuse me?
Rachel: Hips or thighs?
Rachel: (doesn't believe what she's hearing) Seriously?
Rachel: (yelling) Joey, where are those bags?
Joey: Get back in there! (Rachel re-enters her room and closes the door.)
Rachel: Did you just say Emma?
Rachel: Are you kidding?! With the, with the lilies, and-and the song, and the stars! It was really wonderful! Did you just make that up?
Rachel: (To the woman sitting in front of her) He-he said Rachel, right? Do you think I should go up there?
Rachel: That's shocking!
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: My God!
Phoebe: Thank you! (to Rachel) Oh, and I have something for you!
[Cut to Joannas outer office, where Rachel and Sophie work. They are both coming back from lunch.]
Joey: Hey! Rachel: Congratulations! Wow!!
Rachel: Oh!
Rachel: Hey, that was an honest mistake!
Rachel: Mmh-mmh!
Joey: Hey! You hold on pal! Now you made my friend, Rachel, cry. So now, youre gonna go up there and apologize to her, unless you want me to call the landlord.
The Salesman: Ohh, okay. (Laughs.) Something didn't quite add up there. (Ross stops, walks back to talk to the salesman, and in the process pushes Rachel up against a wall.)
[The next flashback is from The One With The Dozen Lasagnas, Phoebe is telling everyone but Rachel about the pass Paulo made on her.]
Rachel: Did I say I was done guessing? Okay, thank you for that. Oh wow! Whats this?
Joey: You mean how they're friends and nothing more? (Glares at Rachel.)