words in movies
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is filing her nails as Ross and Ben enter.]
Rachel: Hi! Hi Ben!
Rachel: Oh, yeah go ahead.
Rachel: No. No.
Rachel: Ben, its Rachel! (He closes the door.) But whatever.
Rachel: Awww, just like his daddy.
Rachel: What-what about Monica?
Rachel: (nervous) So it would just be, me alone?
Rachel: Huh umm
Rachel: Well thatyknow its just uh, Ive never done that before. Me and him alone.
Rachel: Okay. Okay. Okay. Uh, what do I, what do I do with him?
Rachel: Okay.
Ross: Okay. (Ben enters) Ben? Come here. All right, Im gonna leave you here with Aunt Rachel for about an hour. Okay? Are you gonna be okay?
Rachel: Yeah I think so.
Ross: (To Rachel) I wasnt talking to you.
Rachel: Bye. (Ross exits.) Ahhh (Silence) So this is fun, huh?
Rachel: Okay. Uh, want something-want something to drink?
Rachel: Uh great! How do you feel about Diet Coke?
Rachel: Okay. Well thats pretty much all that we haveOh! Oh! Have you ever had a virgin margarita? (Holds up a bottle of margarita mix.)
Rachel: Water it is.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Ben are sitting on the couch bored out of their minds.]
Rachel: Ben yknow when uh, when you were a baby, you and I used to hang out all the time. Cause I was, I was your daddys girlfriend.
Rachel: No, Im not.
Rachel: Hey! We were not on aOkay. Thats fine! Fine. Yknow what Ben? One day when you are a lot older I am going to tell you that entire story over a pitcher of real margaritas, okay?
Rachel: (checks her watch) Fifty-two minutes. (Pause) So no-no brothers and sisters, huh? That must be nice. You dont have to share stuff.
Rachel: Oh, youre one of those. But yknow what? I have two sisters of my own and we just-just tortured each other.
Rachel: Well yknow, we would umm, repeat everything the other said, or uh, wed jump out of closets to scare each other, or switch the sugar for the salt so theyd put salt on their cereal.
Rachel: Yeah? You like that one?
Rachel: Im funny? Oh thank God! Well hey, Ive got a ton of these! Umm, oh hearDo you want a good one? Heres a good one. Umm, you uh, you take a quarter, take a quarter and, and you blacken the edge. Right? (Does so.) And then you say to person, I bet you cant roll this quarter from your forehead to your chin without it leaving your face. And then when they do it, theyre left with a big black pencil line right down the center of their face.
Rachel: Yeah, I-I-I-Im funny Ben, but Im not stupid. Okay?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is reading and there is knock on the door which she answers.]
Rachel: Coming.
Rachel: Uh-oh.
Rachel: Oh yeah? Did he pull the old (She is waving her hand up and down her face. Shes thinking about the pencil mark.)
Rachel: Oh that.
Rachel: Oh, come on! Saran Wrap on the toilet seat, you dont think thats just a little funny?!
Rachel: (looking at his mark) Yes.
[Scene: Carol and Susans, there is a knock on the door and Carol opens it to reveal Rachel.]
Carol: Hey Rachel! (The camera cuts to her face and we see that Ben pulled the quarter trick with her as well.)
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Well yknow I was just in the neighborhood and I passed by your building and I thought to myself, "Whats up with Carol and sweet, little Ben?"
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Id love that. I would loooove (Carol goes to make the coffee and she sits down.) So uh, so where is sweet little Ben? I would love to have a little...
Ben: (jumping up from behind her chair) Gotcha!! (Rachel jumps up startled.)
Rachel: I found him! (To Ben) Very funny, come here! (She sits down on the coffee table and Ben walks up.) That is exactly why Ive come here to talk to you okay?
Rachel: Yes oh(To Ben)Do I want sugar in my coffee? (Ben nods no.) No, just some milk would be good Carol. Thanks. (To Ben) Okay, do you remember all that stuff I taught you yesterday?
Rachel: Dont do that.
Rachel: Seriously, your dad doesnt like pranks.
Rachel: Oh damnit!
Rachel: No! Dont say that! Dont say that!
Rachel: No dont! Go back to repeating!
Rachel: Oh crap!
[Scene: Carol and Susans, Rachel is talking with Ben.]
Rachel: So now what have we agreed?
Rachel: And-and what else?
Rachel: Very good.
Ross: Rachel! What are you doing here?
Rachel: Im just visiting my good friend Carol.
Rachel: Yeah!
Rachel: Carol Lesbian?
Rachel: What line?
Rachel: All right, Im sorry. Im sorry I didnt tell you but you were so mad already!
Rachel: Okay, maybe they are not funny to you
Rachel: Or Carol! But theyre funny to kids and who is it hurting?!
Rachel: That was you?! We heard about you in Junior High! Did you really just shake your fist in the air and shout, "I will be revenged?!"
Rachel: Fine. Fine, but Ill have you know that once I taught him that stuff he called me Fun Aunt Rachel. And I loved being Fun Aunt Rachel but Ill go back to being Boring and Uncomfortable Aunt Rachel if thats what you want!
Rachel: Look he doesnt have any brothers or sisters, somebodys gonna have to teach him this stuff! And I havent taught him anything that a normal 6-year-old doesnt know anyway!
Rachel: I gotta go! (Runs out.)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is in the kitchen as Ross and Ben are entering.]
Rachel: Hey!
Ross: Hey Im sorry to do this to you again but uh, is there any way you can look after Ben for a little bit? I-Ive got this meeting at school. And-and he-he asked for his uh, Fun Aunt Rachel, so
Rachel: Ohhh! Well of course I will watch him! We have fun, dont we Ben? (He nods yes.)
Rachel: Ohh, okay. (Ross has a sign on his back that reads Poop.) WhAh-ha! (Ross stops and turns.) Wait a minute. Uh Ben, I cant do it.
Rachel: I cant let him go out that way, hes got a meeting. (To Ross) Youve got something here on your back.
Rachel: Oh I
Rachel: No! Wait! Come on!
Rachel: No you guys (She walks out into the hallway.)
Ross: I-I-am(Suddenly Ross starts screaming and comes falling down the stairs landing just in front of Rachel.)
Rachel: EHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! My God!!!!!!!!!!! Oh my God!!!!!!! (She runs over to him and finds that it was a dummy and that she had been had.)
Rachel: Whoa! Wait! Hello! What about me?
Rachel: Were not?!
Monica: I justI cant believe that you think that you and Chandler know me and Rachel better than we know you.
Rachel: All right, I like that.
Rachel: Okay, okay, okay.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Okay.
(At this moment Rachel bursts through the door. Needless to say, shes not in the best of moods having just found out Rosss dirty little secret.)
Monica and Rachel: Oh!!
Rachel: Ross, please, this is a hospital, ok? That actually means something here.
Rachel: Yeah, ohh! Why, damnit, why did I open my mouth? (In a girlish voice) I have a crush on you; I am attracted to you. (Back to normal again) Gee, I-I know that I freaked him out
Monica: Ross, Rachel promised it would be over by now. We seriously have to go, if we want to get to Vermont. I called them and the last train leaves in a half hour.
RACHEL: Um, this is gonna sound kinda goofy but uhhm, my friend over there, who cooks by the way, um, she thinks you're cute.
Rachel: Right.
Rachel: Uh-huh.
Rachel: Okay, I heard that.
[Scene: The hallway between the two apartments, Chandler, Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel are coming up the stairs.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey are there.]
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: I am jealous of her?! I mean who does she think she is?! Princess Caroline?!
RACHEL: These are from Halloween three years ago.
Rachel: Okay! I was thinking if its a girl, how about Sandrine? Its French.
Rachel: (confidently) I did!
(Monica smiles to cover her embarrassment, but Rachel sadly looks away...)
Rachel: Jeez!
Rachel: Oh. (smiles) Heres your moisturiser. Hi!
Rachel: How do you think this suit would look on an assistant buyer at Bloomingdales?
Rachel: Its coming from Joey!
Rachel: But y'know, I never really had anything to worry about. Ross was never very good at the flirting thing.
Rachel: Oh, please tell me its not because Im going with Mark.
Rachel: I hope its still funny when youre in hell.
Rachel: No, no, no, wait! Okay, okay. Don't! I'll go, I'll go!
Rachel: Lets do it! Ross?
[Scene: The hallway of Monica's building. Phoebe and Rachel are trying to find the cat's owner.]
Monica: Y'know if its any consolation, he really did sound like he was having more fun with you. (Rachel nods in agreement)
Rachel: (surprised by how ugly it is) Wow! (sarcastic) Oh, she's so nice and big! Oh, Monica, where are you going to display Gladys oh so proudly? (looks around for a spot)
Rachel: On Melanie Griffith in "Working girl". I think what you want is over here.
Rachel: So, I still have boxes here. I still have boxes at Rosss, and I have nowhere to live! Wow. I could so easily freak out right now.
Rachel: (To Ross) You know what? We should call my mum's house and say goodnight to Emma before she goes down.
Rachel: Um, there was a Geller Cup?
Monica: All right! Okay, its just Phoebe. Wills still on a diet, Chandler doesnt eat Thanksgiving food, and Rachels having her aversion to poultry.
Rachel: Oh, yes! Well have ourselves a little baby Ruth
Rachel: OK, alright, OK, um... then could you please, uh... just give him a message for me? Please? This is very important.
Rachel: Wait no, honey, honey throw it to me, throw it to me.
Rachel, Chandler, and Joey: What?
Rachel: You dont pick me! Youre stuck with me!
Rachel: Ross!
Rachel: Oh, well okay. Well, there you go.
Rachel: (Running to her room.) Hi, Pheebs.
Rachel: (coming over to Ross, who is just getting up) Are you okay?
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Over here!
Rachel: Wait, how long?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are comforting Chandler]
Rachel: Wait, what am I gonna do?
Rachel: Good! I'm glad it's not a problem.
Rachel: Okay. Okay. Itssince youve never done it before you can be Monicas made of honor.
Monica: Uh, Aunt Iris? This is Phoebe, and that's Rachel...
Rachel: You had to do it, didnt you? You couldnt just leave it alone.
Rachel: Can I see that for second.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica, Richard, Ross, and Rachel are returning.]
Rachel: Ohh, I love Joey! Joey lives with a duck! (Goes and hugs Joey.)
Rachel: Now, does it really matter?
Rachel: You know what honey, you go ahead, well call her an alternate.
Rachel: Can you not look at me when I say this? (He turns around) I thought that if I could get you here, I could seduce you.
Rachel: Down at the docks again?
Rachel: Oh no, you guys, just stay here, Im gonna go check her diaper, Pheebs you wanna come?
Rachel: Ohh!
Rachel: I went really long.
Rachel: Oh, its okay. (starts to leave)
(Monica pushes him off of the sofa as Rachel enters with a shopping bag.)
Rachel: Hm-mm.
Rachel: Oh, good, good! We had this idea to make a birthday video for Emma and we'll give it to her when she is 18.
[Scene: after the wedding, Ross and Rachel are in the lobby]
Rachel: Yeah!!! Kill um!!!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is writing a letter by the bay window as Rachel enters.]
RACHEL: Phoebe's dead.
Rachel: When did you go to a sperm bank?
Rachel: Im so sorry! Are you okay?
Rachel: Thank you! Break!
Rachel: And heels.
Rachel: Oh, I don't know. I guess it's not about no guys, it's about the right guy, y'know? I mean, with Barry, it was safe and it was easy, but there was no heat. With Paolo, that's all there was, was heat! And it was just this raw, animal, sexual...
Rachel: Thats not her name! Im sorry, she just doesnt feel like an Isabella.
Chandler: (in a manly voice) Yeah well, Im gonna go spit. (He goes into the bedroom. On his way out, Joey gives Rachel a wide berth.)
Rachel: (to Chandler) Eh, do you believe that?
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: What?
Gunther: Rachel?
Rachel: (entering) Hey Ross? Umm, I just ran into Caitlin in the hallway and-and uh, you must be getting better at this flirting stuff than I thought.
Rachel: I know I had it this morning, and I know I had it when I was in the kitchen with...
Rachel: No, hey, come on, if he asked you first, thats only fair. (leaves)
Rachel: Well Phoebe, we gotta do something! (They turn the corner.) Well, yknow. I mean theres no way Joeys gonna make it in time. So Im gonna through the hotel and see if theres any other weddings going on.
RACHEL: Would you let me talk. [flicks Monica on the forehead]
Ross: Dude. Well done. You know what? If I die, and Rachel dies and Monica dies then you can totally take care of Emma.
Rachel: Well that works out good, because I'm not listening.
Phoebe: No! Because hes in love with the British chippy! Look, Rachel, if you go, youre just gonna mess with his head and ruin his wedding! Yknow, its too late! You missed youre chance! Im sorry, I know this must be really hard, its over.
Rachel: Oh. Oh, its beautiful. I see it now.
RACHEL: Only 'cause you took up half the circle.
[Scene: The hallway after the party. Rachel is sitting there.]
RACHEL: No no, 'cause mayo, that would make it gross.