words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Monica, and Rachel are sitting on the couch and Ross is sitting on the chair, and theyre all talking.]
Rachel: Hey! Out of all of us, who do you think is gonna get married next?
Rachel: (to the gang) Oh my God, Melissa Warburton. I dont think I have the energy for this.
Melissa: (Gasps when she notices Rachel) Oh my God! Ray-ray Green?! (Screams)
Rachel: (screaming) Melissa!
Rachel: Wh(Turns and looks at the gang whos staring)Why dont I tell you over here? (She walks Melissa away from the gang.)
Melissa: So last I heard you were gonna get married. (Grabs Rachels hand and notices that she doesnt have a ring on it.) (Sadly) Oh poor Ray-ray.
Rachel: Oh no-no, no! Its good! Its all good! I-I actually work at Ralph Lauren!
Rachel: I will not! Im the divisional head of mens sportswear!
Rachel: Oh please
Rachel: No.
Rachel: Oh tomorrow, oh I dont know. Um
Rachel: Shut up.
Melissa: I-Ive got to go. This has been so great Ray-ray! (Gunther returns with her cigarettes.) Oh, there you are. (Takes them from Gunther.) (To Rachel) Umm, so listen, just call me. Heres my card. (Hands the card over.)
Rachel: Oh, wow thanks! (Reading the card) Oh youre in real estate!
Rachel: Wow! What do you do now?
Rachel: Okay! (Joins the rest of the gang.)
Rachel: Shut up that was my friend Melissa from college.
Rachel: Shes actually very sweet and we used to be very close.
Rachel: (To Monica) Yes.
Rachel: Its not a big deal!
Rachel: No we werent! It was nothing! It was one night, senior year we went to a party, had a lot of sangria and yknow, ended up kissing for a bit.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica is working on the seating chart while Chandler looks on and Rachel reads.]
Monica: (telling Chandler the seating arrangement) Okay so this is where the band is. (Points.) And this is where the bar is. (Points) And all these pins have peoples names on them. (She has pins to show the seating at each of the tables.) And Rach, here you are. (Points to Rachels place.)
Rachel: Oh wow. Why dont we just take me (Grabs her pin) and put me with a Manhattan in my hand, talking to the cute bartender. (Puts her pin at the bar and laughs. Monica just glares at her.) These pins arent for playing are they?
Monica: Chandler, relax its not a contest. (To Rachel) Certainly not a close one.
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Stop picturing it!!
Monica: All right, all right. Maybe I can fit them in if I just do some rearranging. But uh, Rachel may actually have to sit at the bar!
Rachel: That is not a problem.
Rachel: Oh, get out of here! (Jumps back and walks away.)
[Scene: Ralph Lauren, Rachel is showing Chandler the selection of tuxedos.]
Rachel: (motioning to a rack) So now, these are all the tuxedos that we make and if theres anything that you like, we can make you a deal. Anything at all. (Grabs a few) But these are the three that Monica pre-approved.
Rachel: Im Monicas maid of honor. Okay? Dont try to blue pin me!
Rachel: Oh they are nice. We-we custom-make tuxedos for celebrities and then when theyre done with them they just send em back.
Rachel: Some of them.
Rachel: Honey, might I suggest watching a little more ESPN and a little less E!?
Rachel: Umm, well lets see uh, this one is Tom Brokaw.
Rachel: (reading a tag) This one is uh Paul ONeil.
Rachel: He plays for the Yankees. Seriously, ESPN! Just once and a while, have it on in the background. (Chandler nods and Rachel grabs another tux) Ooh, this one was Pierce Brosnan!
Rachel: Uh-huh.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Its a pretty cool tux.
Rachel: (entering) Hey!
Rachel: So Joey I just hooked Ross and Chandler up with some tuxedos for the wedding, do you need one?
Rachel: Well, what are you going to wear?
Rachel: Huh. Does Monica know about this?
Rachel: Can I please be there when you tell her? (Joey nods yes.)
Rachel: Oh, yknow what? I cant. I have to have dinner with that Melissa girl.
Rachel: Well, do you want to hear what actually happened or Joeys lewd version?
Rachel: Hey, come on! I had this friend from college and I made the stupid mistake of telling Joey that one time she and I yknow kissed a little bit.
Rachel: It-it did!
Rachel: Yeah, it was senior year in college. It was after the Sigma Chi luau and Melissa and I got very drunk! And we ended up kissing! For several minutes!
Rachel: Yeah, why is it so hard for you to believe?!
Rachel: Im not saying that Im a lesbian! Im just saying that this happened!
Rachel: (shocked) Vanilla?!
Rachel: Im not vanilla! Ive done lots of crazy things! I mean I got-I got drunk and married in Vegas!
Rachel: All right, yknow what? If you dont want to believe me about this, why dont you just come with me to dinner tonight and she will tell you.
Ross: No. Rachel hooked me up with a tux! But not just any tux, Batmans tux!
[Scene: A restaurant, Melissa, Rachel, and Phoebe are talking.]
Melissa: anyway, his name is Allan and weve been going out for three years. He was my first client when I became a party planner. He was planning a party for his girlfriend at the time. Oh well. (Rachel and Phoebe politely laugh) And he was Theta Beta Pi at Syracuse.
Rachel: Oh. Oh, thats great!
Rachel: (changing the subject) Anyway, speaking of drinking too much. I was uh, tellin Phoebe about that one crazy night after the Sigma Chi luau where you and I uh, we made out.
Rachel: Remember?! Wecome on both had the sarongs on, and we had the-the coconut bikini tops
Rachel: we went back the house and we got really silly and we we made out.
Chandler: Rachel got Ross the tuxedo that Val Kilmer wore in Batman. Okay Batman is so much cooler than James Bond!
Rachel: How can you not remember us kissing?!
Rachel: Wh Come on! Remember? We were on the sleeping porch! We couldnt stop giggling? And our coconuts kept knockin together?
Rachel: Yeahbut come onListen, Im sorry I dont want to make you uncomfortable, but I told Phoebe that it happened and she doesnt believe me.
Rachel: No!!
Phoebe: Rachel, its okay. You dont have to do this. I believe you. All right? Okay, if-if you say that you kissed Melissa, then you kissed Melissa.
Rachel: Thank you Phoebe.
[Scene: Outside the restaurant, Melissa, Phoebe, and Rachel are emerging.]
Rachel: It happened! I am telling you it happened!
Melissa: Okay. (To Phoebe) Well, it was great meeting you. And uh Rachel, I-I dont think Ill be calling you (hails a cab) because umm, yknow youve gotten weird. (The cab pulls up.) Take care you guys.
Rachel: What?! Wait a minute! No wait a minute! (She does so.) Okay? Look, that night was the one wild thing I have ever done in my entire life, and Im not gonna let you take that away from me! Okay, so if you dont remember that, maybe you will remember this! (She grabs Melissa and kisses her on the lips.)
Rachel: (shocked) What?
Melissa: Of course I remember our kiss. I think about it all the time. I can still hear the coconuts knockin together I (Phoebe is shocked.) I just didnt want to tell you cause I didnt think that youd return my love, and now that you have (Leans in to kiss Rachel.)
Rachel: (moving away) Whoa! Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
Rachel: (moves away again) I-I-I-Im just Im just a good kisser!
Rachel: Im sorry!
Melissa: (laughs) Oh you dont have to be (Laughs again) sorry. Im Im obviously kidding. Im not in love with you. (To Phoebe) Im not in love with her. I dont hear coconuts banging together. Yeah, I dont picture your face when I make love to my boyfriend. Anyway, I gotta go. Eh kiss good-bye? (Rachel stares at her stunned.) No? Okay. (Hurries into the cab and drives off.)
Rachel: Wow! I mean I had no idea that that was gonna
Rachel: What the hell was that?!
Rachel: And?
[Scene: Ralph Lauren, Rachel is hooking Chandler up with another tuxedo.]
Rachel: Well yknow what they say, the 23rd times the charm. (Chandler enters.) Aww, look at you all handsome!
Rachel: Oh does it matter?! All that matters is that you look so handsome.
Rachel: I dont want to say.
Rachel: Diane Keeton.
Rachel: Yknow, I gotta tell ya, this really does put in a better mood.
Rachel: Oh, no, no, no. Presents first. Food later. (walks into living room)
Rachel: Okay, a thousand.
Rachel: Yes! Thank you! Exactly! You want it?
Ross: You think?! God, I, ah, Im in hell. I mean what, what am I gonna do? Rachels all like, I love you and, and lets work on this. And all I can think about is, What is she gonna do? What is she gonna say? when I tell her what I did.
Phoebe: Okay. (on phone) We are at a rest stop on Route 27. Okay. (to Rachel) There is no Route 27. (listens) (to Rachel) Okay, either 93 or 76?
Joey: What the?! (Joey pounds the table and starts yelling at Rachel, and which is drowned out by applause. Rachel is desperately trying to tell Joey that hes on TV right now. He finally notices and he does his gracious loser face.)
Rachel: Oh yeah, there you go. (Hands over the pillow.)
Rachel: Yeah, 15 hundred dollars.
(Rachel goes into the bathroom as the guys continue throwing the ball.)
Rachel: Phoebe, are you okay?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is on the phone, Rachel and Monica are sitting in the kitchen.]
Rachel: Sure! (Pause) God, please take those off!
Rachel: What?! What?! My birthday's not for another month!
Rachel: Oh my God, it's so huge, but you just have to promise me that you cannot tell anyone.
Rachel: Chandler!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is kneeling at the coffee table and has a bunch of pictures laid out in front of her as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Oh wow! What now Ross youre not gonna talk? How on earth will you ever annoy me? Oh wait a minute, I know. (Mimics his breathing.) I mean youd think the damn jalepeno wouldve cleared up your sinuses, but no!! Thats not enough (Ross jumps over and kisses her.) What are you doing?!
Rachel: Well, I like you less!
[Scene, Central Perk, everyone except Phoebe and Rachel is there.]
[Scene: Outside Central Perk, Rachel is cleaning up and Monica is pleading with her.]
Rachel: I did the first time! Oh. Oh.. <gets up and walks into the kitchen> And you know what. You want to know why I'm not giving Emily to you.
Rachel: Oh my God! What does that thing do?
Joey: Who would you rather sleep with Monica or Rachel?
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: So were done then!
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: I'm sorry. All right, I'll just stay in here this time. (Puts her head back.) Okay.
Rachel: Okay.
The Doctor: Hi Rachel!
Rachel: Uh-huh.
Rachel: Tag? (He turns and looks at her.) Hi, who was that?
Rachel: Uh-huh.
Rachel: Okay. Okay!
Rachel: All right.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Great!
Rachel: Okay, but taking care of a drunk, naked woman seems like a job for Joey.
Rachel: Damn!
(Chandler, Monica, Joey and Rachel are carrying a couch through the door)
Rachel: Bye you guys!
Rachel: Yeah no, I mean it was at a flea market, so it was yknow, it was like a dollar.
Monica: They really were pretty, werent they? (Rachel and Phoebe both agree)
(Rachel slams shut her window and storms into the living room, where Joey and Monica are eating breakfast.)
[Scene: Rachel and Barrys bedroom, Rachel is watching Days of Our Lives. Of course its a Dr. Drake Remoray scene. Its set in a hospital room, and Dr. Wesley and a nurse are talking about a female patient with a bandage around her head.]
Rachel: Wow! You certainly think a lot of yourself.
Rachel: Eh! Stop it!
Rachel: Yes!
Rachel: All right.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: All right!
Ross: Okay. So well Ill umm, (To Rachel) Ill have her home by midnight.
Rachel: Really?!
Rachel: Okay!
Rachel: Great!
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: (thinks) Four.
Rachel: Mon, honey youre not dying. Im just moving out. Yknow, I mean were gonna see each other all the time.
Rachel: Okay, then y'know what? Help me! I need help! I can't do this!
Rachel: Monica! Stop it!
Rachel: Come on apartment! Come on apartment! (Picks a card.) Oh! I know queen is high!
Rachel: You dont understand! You didnt see how brazen she was.
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler and Rachel are on their knees with forks trying to salvage what they can of the cheesecake off of the floor.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler are there. Ross is still talking to the beautiful woman.]
Rachel: Ugh! Look you guys, I'm really excited about this! Okay? I don't care what you think! I'm gonna go set up a little litter box for Mrs. Whiskerson. (They both glare at her.) Well, what am I gonna call her? Fluffy?!
Rachel: Anyway, I'm going to be the coordinator of the woman's collection, I'll work right under the director, it's the perfect, perfect job for me!
Rachel: Give it here. (She takes the table.) Oh, God. (And gives it to Monica right away.)
Rachel: No-no! Big bear! Big bear outside! I think I-Iwould youactually, would you go check on that?
Rachel: Yep!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is telling Chandler and Monica about her day.]
Rachel: What?!! Stop it! Stop it! Oh my God!
Rachel: (entering from her room) Hey!
Rachel: Pheebs? Could you get that? Please?
Rachel: Oh okay, hey guys, would you flip mine too?
Rachel: Career counselor?
(Monica and Rachel enter breathless.)
Rachel: (out loud): We have apple cinnamon...
(Rachel starts to laugh, and Ross notices her.)
[Scene: Rachels new job, Rachels boss is telling her what to do.]
Phoebe: Wow! I owe Rachel 20 bucks!
Rachel: Yeah, but then you spent Phoebe's entire birthday party talking to my breasts, so then I figured maybe not.
Rachel: (entering with Ross) Hi!
Rachel: That sounds great.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is on the couch reading as Rachel enters. Its the next day.]
Rachel: Yes, you do. When we left, you said, "got the keys."
Rachel: I dont get this! She was horrible! (She hits Chandler, yet again.)
(Rachel begins tapping the picture of the bean frantically.)
(Rachel takes the ball from his hands and bounces it off of Rosss forehead and Chandler catches the rebound.)
Rachel: Yeah, sure?
Rachel: And um, what-what is that Ross?
Rachel: Yes.
Rachel: (laughs) What?! Are you crazy?
Rachel: (gasps) Oh God, you saw me?! Oh!
Rachel: (angrily) No! All right?! I did not see the bird! I did not see the fish! I did not see the piece of Styrofoam that was shaped like Mike Tyson! I did not, because I was trying to teach you how to sail a boat! Which obviously is an impossible thing to do!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is filing her nails as Ross and Ben enter.]
Phoebe: Okay, Rachel, get me perfume!
Rachel: (laughs) I'm sorry, that's not funny.
RACHEL: Uhh, I mean this is like reading about my own life. I mean this book could have been called 'Be Your Own Windkeeper Rachel'.
[Scene: The Girls apartment. Phoebe is dialing the phone and Rachel runs in the door.]
Rachel: You may need to use this year to teach Ben about Phoebe.